


When the Sun Begins to Fall

by megs368



Category: Anne with an E (TV)
Genre: Angst, Completed, I am so sorry for this, It May Hurt, Its a good time, Lets see how many times i can have people call gilbert out on being an idiot, My First Fanfic, Sick Character, True Love, alternate title, and wearing the worst hair gel in the world, gilbert acting all medical and such, spoiler: its a lot, written in the middle of season 3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2020-04-16
Packaged: 2021-01-15 15:23:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 90,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21255530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/megs368/pseuds/megs368
Summary: "Long time no see Carrots."After nine months of studying at The Sorbonne, Gilbert Blythe felt that he was ready for his upcoming graduation and wedding. That is until his brother arrives, informing him his childhood best friend is gravely ill.Written in the middle of season 3!





	1. Miss Shirley

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anne's thoughts are in bold. For some reason, italics was being strange!

When the Sun Begins to Fall  
Chapter One

_“...And that things are not so ill with you and me as they might h-have been, is half owing to the number who li-lived faithfully a hidden life, and rest in un- unvisited tombs."___

“Wonderful job Emily, much improved.” Anne Shirley rested her hand on the young girls shoulder, squeezing it in reassurance. Emily smiled and handed the beloved Miss Shirley back her copy of _Middlemarch_ before making her way back to her seat. Anne decided to do the same, feeling slightly drained after having a cold the last few days. She detested sitting during class, but occasionally she felt the need to make an exception.__

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_ _Behind her desk, she folded her hands and stared at the twenty children sitting before her._ _

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_ _“Now class, I know you are all anxious to go about your weekend, but...” She paused for a moment to let out a chesty cough into her sleeve. “Excuse me. But I would like for all of you to practice your texts for at least an hour each day, and then write a small paragraph about what you have read to be turned in on Monday.” _ _

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_ _Groans erupted from her students as she felt another cough rising in her throat. She understood their frustration, as she was ready to go home herself. Over the last couple of days, she had been finding it harder and harder to make herself rise from her bed in the morning. Every muscle in her body seemed to be working against her and the pains she had in her lungs have made enjoying the morning walks impossible. She coughed into her handkerchief, managing to clear her throat enough to talk, “Now now, I understand your frustrations, however, think of all the wonderful places you can travel within,” she coughed once more, this time harder. She could not seem to get the phlegm out of her throat and it was most aggravating._ _

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_ _After one additional cough, phlegm loosened and made its way up. She looked down and what she thought would be a ball of gunk, was actually a tiny red dot. For a moment, the dot gave her pause but she was soon brought back when a student cleared their throat. Shoving the rag in her apron, she smiled up at her students. “Ah, yes, sorry. I believe I am getting a cold. Class, you are free to go, enjoy the world around you.”_ _

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_ _Without hesitation, everyone began bustling about the room, gathering their items and talking about their weekend plans. Anne observed for a moment before she turned on her heels, heading to her office. Shutting the door behind her, she pulled handkerchief out of her pocket and brushed her fingers against the dot. ** Blood?** __

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_ _ _ _“No,” she whispered, “perhaps it's something I ate.” Although she said it with surety, she wasn’t convinced. Ever since she was young she has had an overactive imagination and the places her mind were going right now were plenty. None of them were good either._ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _A knuckle tapped against the door causing Anne to jump and drop the rag. “Come in,” she yelled as she bent down to grab it. She must have stood up too quickly because instantly the room was spinning and she felt as if she could faint. Bracing herself against her desk as she tried to regain her composure, the door opened to reveal Minnie May Barry, who over the last few years, she had truly grown into a beautiful young lady. Her mouse brown hair fell in gentle ringlets and her doe brown eyes sparkled even on the darkest day. The only girl who could possibly be prettier than her in Avonlea would be Diana. When Anne was a girl, she would have given anything to look like either of the Barry girls. _ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _“Anne?”_ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _“Minnie May, I’m Miss Shirley during school,” Anne mumbled as she rubbed her forehead.The room was still dancing around her, causing her to use extra effort just to focus on standing upright. She felt that if she didn’t sit immediately, she would surely faint._ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _“Well schools not in session now, so you’re Anne,” Minnie May retorted. Normally Anne would scold her, telling her to stop acting smart with her but she couldn’t find the energy. She pulled out her desk chair and attempted to sit gracefully but somehow she missed the chair and landed on the floor with a plop. Minnie May raced towards her and grabbed her arm, attempting to pull her up. “Are you alright, Anne!?”_ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _Embarrassed, Anne accepted her help and pulled herself up into the chair. “Oh yes, I am fine. Just a little dizzy is all. I must have accidentally laced my corset too tightly this morning.” Minnie May did look assured so Anne plastered the best smile she could muster. “What did you need, dear?”_ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _Minnie May hesitated for a brief moment before she spoke. “Diana is coming home tomorrow from Paris. Mama wanted me to ask if you were still bringing your famous apple pie.”_ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _Anne silently cursed herself for feeling ill. **Oh, why this weekend of all weekends? The one I am supposed to reunite with my bosom friend after she has been away for so long. Of all the unlucky things in my life, this is the worst so far.** “Of course I will be there,” she managed utter before she went into a fit of rough, dry coughs. Somehow this fit felt worse than before, it made her head pound. She looked in her tea pot hoping she had a little left but was left feeling disappointed to find it empty. Minnie May, understanding what was needed, pulled a jar of milk out of her lunch pail, gesturing it towards her. Grateful, Anne took the jar and poured it into her cup. In between coughs, she sipped slowly as Minnie May looked on. It felt cool on her throat and her coughing began to cease.“Thank you.” _ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _Minnie May nodded, concern crossing her face as she took the jar back from Anne. “Are you sure you’re alright?” _ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _“Oh yes, just a cold. A good night of rest and I will be right as rain in the morning.” Anne smiled brightly taking her young friend’s hand within her own. “Now run along and let your mother know that of course I am bringing my pie, and I am anxiously awaiting tea time.” A smile danced on Minnie May’s lips as she turned and skipped out towards the front of the room, where she had a large group of friends awaiting her arrival. Anne looked on, letting her smile fall into a gaze of nostalgia. How she missed walking home with Diana after classes, seeing her bosom friend daily and recanting stories of adventure and wonder. _ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _She turned towards her desk,momentarily forgetting the sharp pain in her temples and pulled out the half heart locket that she shared with Diana. The locket now shared the chain with a small silver key that looks as if it came straight from a fairy tale. Her hand reached to the top of her desk, where a locked drawer held her greatest treasures. Slowly she unlocked the drawer and began pulling out each item carefully. On top, lay Matthew’s “Most Unusual” ribbon from the county fair mere months before he passed. She held it close for a moment, thinking how proud he was of that radish and how they ate the entire vegetable over the course of the following week. She chuckled, she hasn’t been able to stomach radish ever since. A cough escaped her lips as she pulled out the blue ribbon Diana had worn almost everyday of their friendship. She had been bestowed it not long before Di had left for Paris, asking her to always keep it close. She decided she would bring it tomorrow for tea, to show she had indeed kept her promise. _ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _Next she pulled her copy of Jane Eyre given to her by Aunt Josephine for her sixteenth birthday. Inside of that held the portrait that Cole had penned of her so many years ago, along with flowers she had pressed from various occasions. A carnation from Matthews funeral, a daisy from Mary’s garden, dandelions from the first flower crown Dellie had made for her, and a wildflower picked by Gilbert while they walked the White Way of Delight after receiving their scores from the Queen's entrance exam._ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _At the thought of the curly haired friend she had cared for so deeply, the pain in her chest worsened. She scolded herself. ** Push away those thoughts Anne, he is happy, you are happy.** But she was lying to herself, as she had been everyday for the last two years. Even she, who had never had any issue with describing her feelings, struggled to find words to describe how much she missed her friend and academic rival. ____

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_ _ _ _Before she could stop herself, she reached into the back corner of the drawer, pulling out a pocket dictionary and a bundle of letters. She ran her fingers along the spine of the book, that had begun to tear on the edges due to constant use. “So you can beat me fair and square,” she whispered, opening up the cover out of habit. She never did get to truly beat him. The last time they competed was at the Queens entrance exams, which they both ended up in first place and became dual recipients of the prize money. It should have made her angry but when he came to Green Gables to tell her the news, they both hugged without any indication of malice._ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _A smile danced on her lips once more as she turned her eyes to the letters, all of them from one sender. She pulled out the top letter, which was clearly much older than the rest due to its dark yellow hue. The envelope was falling apart from the letter coming out so often although now she didn’t have to read it to know its contents. It had been memorized for years. Her smile widened when suddenly she felt something rising in her throat. One, two coughs escaped her lips before she sputtered out crimson liquid on the envelope. She dropped the envelope in horror, only now realizing it felt like someone was poking an ice pick into her skull. _ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _ **Well that’s not good…** Quickly she began putting her items back in their designated spot, when she turned her attention back to the envelope on the floor. Slowly, not wanting to make the room start spinning again, she bent down to pick it up and laid it gently on the desk, not wanting it to drip onto any of her other treasures. She pulled the key from the drawer and placed it gently around her neck, deciding it was finally time to attempt standing. It took longer than it would usually but eventually she was standing on her own two feet without support. She fastened her shawl around her shoulders. Despite it being a warm September afternoon, she felt slightly chilled.__ _ _

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_ _ _ _ _ _Stepping out of her office, she locked the door behind her. Slowly, she made her way through the center aisle, using each desk as additional support, stopping for only a brief moment at the fourth one back. She would use the excuse that she needed to catch her breath but she always found herself drawn to the desk her old rival used to sit at. It sat empty every day, none of her students chose to sit at it, but she felt a more powerful force at work. Like they were saying that spot belonged to Gilbert and to him alone. _ _ _ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _ _ _Another cough pulled her gaze from desk. She made her way to the door as another rose in her throat only this time it was joined by a metallic taste. A taste she had become used to all too quickly. She managed to pull her handkerchief out just as the blood rose in her throat. The spot was larger this time but not as much as she had brought up in her office, which she was grateful for. Shoving it back in her apron, she fished the schoolhouse key from the other pocket. Around her, images began to blur. She managed to get the key into the lock on the fourth attempt. _ _ _ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _ _ _“Auntie!” A sweet voice called from behind her seconds before arms tackled her legs with a bear hug. Anne braced herself against the wall and began to see stars. _ _ _ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _ _ _“Oh, hello Dellie!” she said as cheerfully as possible. The dizziness was worsening now but in truth, she was happy to see the little girl who had brought so much joy into her life over the last three years._ _ _ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _ _ _“Careful Dellie, you don’t want to knock Queen Anne over now, do ya?” Sebastian called from a little farther down the path, carrying a basket in one hand. He greeted her with a toothy grin and Dellie released her legs, opting to hold Anne’s hand in one of her own, and her father’s in the other. Anne looked down to see the the basket filled to the brim with gorgeous red apples._ _ _ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _ _ _“Oh, those must be the apples for the pie,” Anne smiled softly, unsure if she could manage more. She of all people loved conversation but today, she was willing the conversation to end soon. All she wanted at the moment was a cup of tea and one of Marilla’s quilts draped over her lap._ _ _ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _ _ _“Yes they are. Freshly picked today, especially for you, by Miss Delphine Lacroix,” As he said her name, he poked Dellie’s cheek, sending her into a fit of giggles. He joined in her laughter and poked her again. Anne wished she could join in their joy, but something was feeling very wrong at that moment. Her face suddenly felt flush and the world around her spun so quickly, she felt she was going to puke. “Sorry for bringing them here, but you know how much she loves seeing the school…” he stopped suddenly, his eyes finally reaching her face. His smile dropped instantly and looked at her with great concern. “Anne, are you alright?” _ _ _ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _ _ _Before she knew what was happening, her knees gave way and she fell forward, ripping her hand away from Dellies. _ _ _ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _ _ _“ANNE!” Bash caught her with ease, throwing the apples on the ground. Dellie stood stock still for the first time in her life. _ _ _ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _ _ _“Bash,” Anne whispered, “I think I am in need of assistance getting ho-” she was interrupted by the worst coughing fit she had all day. Everything hurt, her lungs were on fire, her head felt like it was going to come off of her shoulders, and the world continued to spin._ _ _ _ _ _

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_ _ _ _ _ _“Auntie?” Dellie had begun to cry. Anne wish for nothing more to reach out and wrap Dellie up in her arms, tell her that she was okay but her body betrayed her. Her body felt like Atlas holding up the sky. She was tired. So incredibly tired. **I need to rest my eyes...just for a moment.** The last thing she remembered before falling asleep was Bash picking up Dellie, throwing her onto his back before he picked up Anne, and began running to Green Gables.___ _ _ _

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> need a new kindred spirit? need to talk about the new episodes? find me on tumblr: @onedayiwillflyfree
> 
> Also, a huge shoutout to Lil_Rehead (@royalcordelia) for her advice and edits! You're a gem <3


	2. Doctor Blythe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Doctor Blythe will see you now ;)
> 
> Okay that was a really bad joke. Ignore me.

Chapter 2

Despite all of the stresses that medical school had brought to Gilbert Blythe, he was thankful for everything he had learned over the last year. One skill he was exceptionally grateful for was the ability to stitch a patient's wound in under a minute flat. Especially when the patient was a ten year old boy who had been dared to climb the roof of the local church and tripped, only to have his fall broken by a sharp rock.

Benjamin Beckley, the daredevil himself, was trying his best to put on a brave face. To his credit, he was doing a decent job at it too, except the bravery didn’t quite meet his eyes. Tiny pools of water formed in each as Gilbert pushed the needle through the torn skin of his forearm for the last time. After tying off the thread, he reached for the scissors that sat on the table next to him.

“And there we go, my daring friend,” he said with a quick snip of the string. As he turned to put his utensils on the table, out of the corner of his eye, he saw Ben swiftly run his good hand across his lashes. Pretending not to notice, he grabbed a bandage and turned his attention back to the boy. In one swift movement, he circled the bandage around the freshly stitched wound. “Not too tight?”

Ben sniffed, shaking his head. “No sir.”

Gilbert smiled reassuringly as he tied the banage. “Good lad.” The young boy sniffed once again as Gilbert reached beside him to grab a rag to clean his hands. “You know, Ben, I know another individual who was once dared to climb a church roof as well.” For the first time since his arrival, the young boy met Gilbert’s eyes.

“What happened?” he whispered curiously.

“Well, she almost did it.” He put the rag back as a reminiscent smirk graced his lips. “But she fell and ended up twisting her ankle. Nothing too horrible. It definitely could have been a lot worse for both of you.” The young boy began to lower his eyes again when Gilbert placed a hand on his shoulder, causing him to meet Gilbert’s eyes once more. “So how about you stay off of rooftops from now on? I think you already proved how brave you are just now.” Gesturing towards Ben’s freshly bandaged arm. His face instantly brightened as Gilbert slyly winked at him.

“Yes sir!” Ben said proudly. Ben’s mother, who had been standing silently in the farthest corner, stepped forward with a stern expression. She held out her hand to Gilbert, which he accepted, giving it a shake.

“Thank you, Doctor Blythe. I certainly hope that Ben has learned his lesson about listening to those friends of his,” Mrs Beckley looked at her son with the same expression that Marilla had given Anne. Gilbert had to bite his tongue in order not to laugh. “What do you say, Benjamin?”

“Thank you sir,” he whispered sadly. Mrs Beckley opened her mouth, ready to scold her son, before she was interrupted by Gilbert reaching out his hand and ruffling the boys hair.

“Just be careful, alright?” Ben’s eyes met his and he smiled gently once more, which Gilbert returned. As the three of them made their way out of the examination room, Gilbert grabbed a small jar of golden salve. “Now Mrs. Beckley, apply this salve directly to the wound twice a day for the next week or so. It will help prevent infection as well as reduction of scaring. Once it is applied, make sure you wrap it back with a clean bandage and he should be right as rain before you know it.”

Mrs Beckley took the salve in her hands, tilting the bottle side to side before her hand slid up to the lid. _Oh boy, here we go_ Gilbert thought to himself. She twisted the lid and brought the jar to her nose, surprise crossing her face when she took a whiff.

“Is this honey?” She asked skeptically.

“Ah yes, mixed with a little bit of goldenrod,” he responded proudly. Early last summer, he had spent a week learning from the local tribe that resided near Avonlea. The Mi'kmaq had been hesitant about teaching a white man their methods, especially after everything that happened to Ka’kwet, but luckily a certain redhead had convinced them he simply wanted to expand his medical knowledge and would be respectful of their practices. It was one of the most fascinating weeks of his life and the knowledge he had gained from it had improved his skills tremendously.

“Well, that is certainly...different.” Her eyes narrowed. “Did Doctor Ward teach you this?”

Gilbert straightened, preparing himself for the shouting that would soon follow his response. “No actually, I learned this from a lo…”

“He learned it from his time studying at the Sorbonne!” Winifred, who had been witness to the entire conversation, stood from her desk. He had almost forgotten she was in the office. She made her way over to stand next to Gilbert, sliding her arm through his. “Gilbert just got back a week ago from a semester abroad and he learned all sorts of new tricks of the trade. Isn’t that right, darling?”

He desperately wanted to correct her, to tell them he had learned it from people who had been using these methods before their grandparents were even born. But for some reason, he couldn’t form the words. He was tired after a full day of work and wasn’t sure he had the fight in him at the moment. So instead, he pulled his lips into a tight smile and gave a curt nod. “That’s right.”

This answer seemed to please Mrs. Beckley, whose demeanor changed drastically. Smiling, she put the jar into her hand bag and put her hand on her son's shoulders. “Well, I am glad to hear that. Thank you again, and good day Doctor Blythe.” Winnie slid her arm out of Gilbert's, gliding towards the front door to show out the mother and son. He lifted his hand in farewell then immediately bringing it up to run his fingers through his hair, only to find it stiff and unmoving. _ Damn forgot about the pomade._ While in Paris, Winnie had convinced him to try out a new product that held hair in place, saying it would make him look more professional to have his hair out of his eyes. He agreed but at times, he missed his curls moving freely, especially when he was frustrated.

“Come back if you need anything else,” Winifred called before he heard her bolt the latch. Swiftly she made her way back down the hallway. With a smile dancing on her lips, she crossed to her desk, grabbing her coat from the back of the chair. “Well, that was certainly an interesting last patient for the week.”

“Indeed,” he responded, striding over to the water basin to wash his hands. He must have put the water pitcher down harder than he wanted because Winnie’s smile fell. Silently, she put her coat back down and timidly stepped towards him. She looked over his shoulder as he began to scrub a few spots of dried blood under his nails.

“I know you’re upset about my interruption,” she rested her hand on his shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I apologize.”

Gilbert stopped scrubbing and sighed. “I understand why you did it, but it still doesn’t make it any less frustrating.” He dropped the brush into the basin and grabbed a fresh towel from the shelf. “The Mi’kmaq have been using these techniques for hundreds of years and they work, Winnie. Their natural methods actually work. Why shouldn’t they be credited?” Winnie frowned as he dried his hands, throwing the towel into a basket on the floor. She turned him around to face her.

“Darling,” she spoke softly. “I admire how you are always willing to learn and try new things. But the world isn’t as forward thinking as you and I,” she slid her hand down to his, holding it at his side. “Perhaps some day they will be, but for now, we must adapt on occasion.”

Gilbert took a deep breath once more as a million thoughts raced through his head. He had never been one to adapt, it wasn’t who he was or who he wanted to be. His father had taught him that no matter what happens in his life, he must remain true to his beliefs. And at the moment, he felt as if he wasn’t following that lesson. But much like the frustration he had earlier with Mrs Beckley, he pushed this aside as well. He was exhausted and hungry.

Winnie must have sensed this because instantly a coy smile made its way to her lips. “Now, Doctor Blythe, why don’t we close up the office and head off? We have much to discuss before tomorrow.”

Confusion crossed Gilbert's face. “Tomorrow? What’s tomorrow?” he asked clueless. Winnie’s smile dropped once more only this time, her hand joined it.

“Gilbert, did you honestly forget my parents are coming into town tomorrow? To help settle wedding plans?” Gilbert felt like smacking his head against the wall. Of course he had forgotten, he would forget his own head if it wasn’t attached to his body. The only thoughts he had anymore involved medical equations and how to identify whether or not a person had the common cold. It honestly didn’t leave much room for anything else. Or at least that is what he told himself.

In all honesty, he wasn’t exactly sure why he couldn’t focus on the wedding. He should be thrilled and full of joy, but he couldn’t seem to find the energy to do so. When he proposed to her two years ago, he had felt so sure of himself. Even in the late summer months in Paris, he had been happy to finally begin the wedding planning. But now, it was as if some mysterious force was begging him not to go through with it.

He pinched the bridge of his nose before sliding his hand through his hair once more, this time pulling a curl lose. “Oh Win,” Pushing the nagging feeling aside, he opened his eyes to look at his bride to be, who was wearing a look of mild disappointment. “I am so sorry. With all the traveling, covering for Doctor Ward, and preparing to go back to school...I am not even sure which way is up anymore.”

Her lips formed a tight smile as she brushed the curl out of his eyes, pushing it back into place with all the others. “It’s alright dear, I forgive you...this time.” She giggled as he rolled his eyes and smirked. Despite his doubts, he did thoroughly enjoy Winifred's company. She was easy to be with, never challenging him and supporting his ambitions, along with being exceptionally beautiful. It was everything a man would want in a wife, right?

“Well, I don’t know about you, but I am famished,” Winnie made her way back over to her desk, grabbing her coat once more. “I believe we have tea and cakes calling our names...that is, of course, if you’re feeling up to it.”

Gilbert must have looked as tired as he felt. And honestly, the last thing he wanted to do this evening was to sit in a posh tea shop, eating sandwiches that would hardly fill him. But as she had said before, sometimes you have to adapt, so he straightened up and tried to erase the exhaustion from his face. But just as he was opening his mouth to respond, a mysterious figure sprinted by the window, catching his attention. Within the next second a frantic knock came on the door. Winnie jumped, peering worriedly at Gilbert. He held up a hand as if to tell her to wait by the desk as he inched closer to the door. And of course she didn’t listen, instead choosing to step behind him, matching each step towards the door. Another frantic knock rang through the room, only this time, it was accompanied with a familiar voice.

“Doctor, if you’re in there, please open the door!” Gilbert, knowing the voice could only belong to one man, ran to the door. He unlatched the door and threw it open to see Bash doubled over, fighting to catch his breath.

“Bash!” Gilbert cried in excitement. Sebastians head shot up.

“Blythe?! I figured...” he took a deep breath and tried to stand up straight. “I figured you would be in Kingsport by now!” Once Bash had fully straightened, Gilbert couldn’t contain his excitement and threw his arms around his brother, holding him so tightly that the wind was probably going to be knocked out of him all over again.

“Doctor Ward asked me to fill in this week while he took time to rest…” He paused, pulling away from the hug. Now that the initial excitement had passed, he looked Sebastian in the eyes and saw one thing: fear. “Bash, not that I’m not thrilled to see you but... why are you here? Is Dellie alright?”

Bash wiped sweat from his brow. “Dellie is fine. But there is something wrong with…” he looked at Gilbert fully for the first time since the arrival. His hand instantly reached up to Gilberts hair, giving it a soft pat. “What is wrong with your hair Blythe? Lose a bet?”

Gilbert swatted his hand away and put his hands on either shoulder. “Bash, I need you to focus. What’s wrong?”

Fear flashed across Sebastian’s face once more. “It’s Anne.” Immediately at the mention of her name, Gilbert’s chest tightened and his throat dried. “Gilbert...she’s horribly ill...none of us have any clue what is wrong with her.”

The color drained from Gilberts face. Bash continued to speak as Winnie gestured for him to come inside. Even though he followed behind them, he couldn’t hear what was being said anymore, becoming too buried in his thoughts.

_Anne is sick… okay, it could be nothing, it could just be a cold. She could just be acting dramatic. Anne has always had a knack for dramatics._

“Bash…” he willed his voice to remain steady and calm as he looked up to see Winifred handing Sebastian a cup of tea. “How sick is she exactly?”

He swallowed the entirety of the cup in one gulp, resting it down on the counter. “Well,” he wiped a stray drop of tea from him mouth. “She had this coughing fit that weakened her so badly that I had to carry her back to Green Gables myself.”

“A coughing fit?” Gilberts throat dried, fearing the different diagnoses that were popping into his head. Winnie glanced over to him, worry consuming her eyes. A question formed in his throat but he seemed unable to ask it out loud. Come on Gilbert, treat her like any other patient. But she wasn’t just any patient. She was Anne. The smartest girl in all of Avonlea, the girl who fought to help those whose voices tended to go unheard in society. The girl who could make even the most boring school lesson fun. The girl that had hair the color of fire and ocean eyes. She was the girl who he had once dreamed of spending the rest of his life with. He forced the question out before he could stop it again: “Was there blood?”

Bash hesitated for a moment before nodding his head silently. Gilbert's body suddenly flew into a frenzy, racing into the examination room and threw open his bag. He began frantically filling it with everything his could possibly think he would need. Stethoscope, thermometer, different vials of pain medication, anything he thought might help.

“Gilbert?” Bash and Winnifred stepped into the doorway, watching the man frantically ran through the room throwing open cabinets and drawers.

“Bandages? No, we shouldn’t need those. Syringes…” he carefully placed two in his bag next to the pain medication, praying he wouldn’t have to use them. He made his way through the door, ignoring the two people who quickly stepped aside to avoid being pushed. “Winifred,” he shouted over his shoulder as he walked over to her desk, opening the top drawer to grab his wallet. “I am sorry but I need you to stay here and ring Doctor Ward first thing in the morning. Tell him he needs to come to Avonlea on the earliest train he can get.”

Bash and Winnie exchanged glances. Both confusion and worry crossed their faces as they watched Gilbert run frantically around the room, grabbing random books and throwing them into his bag.

“Gilbert…” Winifred spoke softly in an attempt to calm him.

“Alright, its 6:30 now. The last train leaves at 6:45, which means we can make it if we run.” Gilbert snapped his bag shut, making his way over to the coat rack, once again pushing past the two. He reached for his coat, trying to pull it on with one hand.

“_Blythe!_” Bash yelled, causing Gilbert to bump into the counter, which sent the teacup crashing to the floor. Silence engulfed the room as the three people stared awkwardly at one another. “Gilbert, take a deep breath brother,” Bash took a tender step towards him, gingerly taking in a deep breath while instructing Gilbert to do the same. He put his bag down and took a deep breath as he put his coat on. “Good, now answer me calmly, what do you think is wrong with Anne?”

He let out his breath and buttoned the middle button on his coat. “I can’t say for sure without seeing her,” he picked up his bag from the counter and stepped over the shattered teacup. “But let’s just hope it’s not what I think it is.”

For the first time since his frenzy had started, he looked at Winnie, realization dawning on him. “Your parents…”

She stepped forward, putting her hands on his shoulders. “Go. Go help Anne.” she smiled softly as she said their friends name. “I will phone my parents this evening and tell them not to come. When I get a hold of Doctor Ward, he and I will be on the first train out to help.”

He smiled at her, took her hands within her own and did something he had never done before: he kissed them. “Thank you.” She gave him one last smile before he turned his attention to Bash. “You up to run some more?”

Gilbert made his way over to the door, grabbing the door handle. Bash walked up next to him, glancing at him sideways. “I am, but I wish you would tell me what has got you so worked up.”

His voice caught in his throat once more, so instead of responding, he threw open the door and began to run. Within seconds Bash had matched his pace and Gilbert's nerve returned. “Consumption, Bash,” he said between each step, his eyes stinging with tears. “I fear she may have consumption.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ruh roh raggy...
> 
> let's be friends! find me on tumblr: @onedayiwillflyfree


	3. Hey Carrots

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologizing in advance for the feels trip you may experience over the 3800 words.

Chapter 3

Gilbert had loved train rides for as long as he could remember. When he was a boy, he always marvelled at their speed and how the scenery looked as they passed by. Now when he boarded one, his mind filled with happy memories of his father and their many adventures in his last few months of life. It had never failed to bring a smile to his face until today.

Today, the train seemed to be trudging along far too slowly and, despite the changing leaves and the cerulean water crashing against the outer edges of the island, the scenery looked dull. Gilbert’s foot bounced as anxiety coursed through his body, his eyes glued out the window.

_You haven’t seen her yet, you don’t know that it is consumption. You need to see her. Stop jumping to conclusions._

Bash nudged Gilbert’s twitching foot gently with his own. His attention shot to the man across from him, who in turn gestured towards Gilberts hands and passed him a handkerchief. Gilbert glanced down to notice he had unconsciously tore off the skin surrounding his thumb nail and blood was dripping down the back of his hand. He accepted the rag, pressed it firmly against the ripped skin and turned his attention back to the window. His eyes were starting to burn with exhaustion. Looking down at his watch, he deduced that he had been up for close to fifteen hours already, waking up early to study before he went in to care for back to back patients for twelve hours. Now that he thought about it, he was pretty sure he hadn’t eaten yet either.

“Blythe,” Gilbert lazily rolled his eyes in Bash’s direction. “Get some sleep, worrying won’t make the time go any faster.” Gilbert opened his mouth in protest but Bash lifted his hand. “You and I both know how you are when you don’t sleep. You won’t be any good for her if you’re like this.”

He felt the need to argue but Bash turned his head out the window, indicating the discussion was over. Gilbert rubbed his eyes while quietly deciding that his obnoxious brother was correct. When he was exhausted, he could barely add two and two together, let alone take care of someone. He adjusted himself so that his back was facing the window, resting his head on the cool pane of glass that separates him from the passing world. As he drifted off to sleep, he swore he could hear the trees whispering good night to him.

\-------

_“So, when do you suppose you will be back?” Anne questioned sorrowfully, wrapping her shawl tighter around her shoulders. Gilbert hated when she looked this upset. He never quite knew the right thing to say to her. _

_He took a deep breath as he walked over to a dying tree at the end of the orchard. “It’s only a semester, but Winnie’s father has set up for me to stay through the summer to attend lectures and expos. So roughly the end of August, give or take.” He took out spool of twine, wrapping it around the trunk of the tree. Bash would need to cut it before next season to make room for a new tree. _

_“And you’re leaving the day after Christmas?” Anne mumbled._

_He turned to face her and nodded. “Yes, I am meeting Winnie up in Charlottetown and we will be leaving two days before the new year.” _

_“Oh,” she mumbled as she brushed a stray curl behind her ear. Gilbert had always found Anne to be beautiful but recently she had begun to wear her hair up in the most intricate styles, each one complementing her face perfectly. He hated to admit it but everyday, when she met him at the end of the Blythe-Lacroix orchard, his heart skipped a beat. _

_They stood in silence for a moment, staring at each other. Anne broke the silence as she turned to face the far end of the orchard. “Perhaps we should keep walking. It’s getting late and if you want to finish tonight, then we should move on.” _

_He stepped toward her and instantly they fell back into stride with one another. Over the last four months, since their graduation, each day they would meet on the path where the orchard met the woods and they would walk. Some days they would share ideals and discuss poetry, other days Anne would rant about the pranks some student (whose name began with an M and ended with an innie May) had played on her._

_And some days they would get into such a disagreement that Anne would storm off in a rage, claiming she would never speak to him again. But he didn’t worry because he knew the next day, right on time, she would walk up the bend carrying a peace offering. It had become a routine and the most treasured part of his day._

_They continued walking the length of the orchard in silence, making Gilbert feel incredibly uncomfortable. They used to be able to silently study with one another, casting occasional glances up at one another. But this silence was different, it wasn’t routine._

_ He stopped by one of the final rows of tree and plucked a perfect green apple. He smirked, noticing Anne deep in thought as she continued walking. “Hey, Carrots,” Anne spun around. Her hair caught loosely on a stay branch, pulling her hair pins out of their designated spot as she turned, causing fiery curls to fall over her shoulders. Gilbert’s smirk grew mischievously as a flush crept up her cheeks. “Catch.” He threw the apple, which she caught with ease. She was preparing to throw it back when he turned on his heels and sprinted towards the woods._

_“Gilbert Blythe!” he heard her yell as she began to take off after him. “You get back here!” He ran, dodging the trees, occasionally throwing a look over his shoulder to make sure she was still there. She was trying to maintain a serious face as she ran, but every time she yelled at him to stop, he heard laughter in her voice. It was the sweetest sound he had ever heard._

_He slowed his stride as they closed in on the lake that Anne had beautifully dubbed The Lake of Shining Waters. Once she closed in, she took aim at his back and threw the apple as hard as she could. It landed on the ground beside him with a soft thud. _

_“You’re gonna have to do better than that, Carrots!” he shot a look over his shoulder only to notice she wasn’t running after him any longer. Instead, she stood about ten feet away, panting, her face pink as a peony. He slowed to a stop, meeting her eyes with his own. “Awe Anne,” he ran his fingers through his hair as he started taking steps back towards her. “I was just messin…”_

_“You promise you will come back, right? To Avonlea, I mean.” Anne asked, stopping him dead in his tracks. He stared at her with wide eyes. “Because when you last left...you promised me that you would come home someday. And you did. And back then...we didn’t even have what we have now.” She looked into his eyes, stepping closer to him slowly._

_Gilbert felt as if his heart was going to pound out of his chest. “What do you mean by what we have now?” She continued to step closer to him and he didn’t dare move. Once she was not more than two feet away, she stopped and took a deep breath._

_“I just mean this,” she gestured her hands between the two of them as if he was supposed to understand what she meant. He cocked an eyebrow and she rolled her eyes. “Happiness...when we are together. Don’t you feel it too?”_

More than you will ever know _Gilbert thought to himself. He dared to take a step forward and when she didn’t break his gaze, he closed the remaining foot that separated them._

_They continued to hold each other's gaze, Anne not shying away as she used to so often. Something had changed within her since Matthew had passed and she began at Queens. She exuded confidence and strength, becoming the woman she always dreamed she would be as a girl. _

_Gilbert wasn’t sure how long they stared at one another for, frankly he didn’t care. He could have stayed there, staring at this beautiful fire queen for the rest of his life if it was allowed. And it was within that moment that he realized the truth. He didn’t want Paris. He didn’t want Sorbonne or even Winifred. He wanted Anne Shirley Cuthbert, the girl who had broken a slate across his face and competed with him so fiercely all these years. Deep down, he had always wanted Anne. _

_“Ask me to stay,” he told her, breaking the silence. Anne looked taken aback by the sudden declaration and tears to form in her eyes. They looked on the verge of pooling over when she quickly swept them away. Before she could put her hand back down at her side, he grabbed it in his own. Her skin felt smooth against his calloused palms but her hand fit perfectly within his. It felt right, “I will stay if you ask me to.”_

_Anne looked at their joined hands and began to contemplate the choice she had been presented with. After a moment, she bit her lip and lifted her free hand up to Gilberts face. She gingerly touched a stray curl before she moving it down to caress his cheek. He held his breath in fear she would pull away if he exhaled._

_Sadness flashed across her face and swiftly she pulled away from him, stepping back until they had a few feet between them. Tears fell over her eyelids but she didn’t seem to care. Her voice cracked when she spoke. “I can’t Gil… I’m so sorry…” With that, she turned and ran back up the hill. He wanted to reach out, he wanted to catch her and wrap her up in his arms and never let go. But he knew now that he couldn’t. She had made her choice. _

_And it wasn’t him._

\------- 

“Gilbert,” he opened his eyes to see Bash standing over him, gently shaking his shoulder. Gilbert straightened and rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He peered out the window to the small train platform with a faded sign that read _WELCOME TO AVONLEA_. Bash patted his shoulder. “Welcome home, brother.”

\-------

“Mr. Lacroix, over here!” a voice called from a wagon just down the road. Gilbert smiled, immediately recognizing the wagon and its driver. Jerry Baynard climbed down, tying Belle’s reigns against the hitching post before turning towards the pair. “Gilbert! Welcome home!” Jerry held out his hand that Gilbert accepted, feeling slightly ashamed of how soft his hands had become in the last nine months.

“Jerry, good to see you,” Gilbert replied curtly, throwing his bag onto the back of the wagon and pulling himself up. He wasn’t intentionally trying to be rude, he was excited to be home and to see his old friend, but he wasn’t exactly in the mood for small talk. Jerry, seeming to understand Gilbert's attitude, swiftly untied Belle’s reins and handed them up to Sebastian, who had taken his place in the driver's seat. Bash reached out a hand and pulled Jerry up next to him before giving the reins a sharp flick.

“So,” Jerry turned in his seat. “I have to ask…” He pointed up to Gilberts head. “What’s with the hair?” Bash let out a roar of laughter so loud that it frightened Belle, almost causing them to veer into a ditch. Gilbert rolled his eyes as a confused Jerry looked between the two men.

“See,” Bash, still chuckling as he steered Belle back to center. “Told you there was somethin’ wrong with it.” He cast a glance back at Gilbert, whose jaw tensed. Bash cleared his throat. “Jerry, how about you sing us one of those tunes you’re always hummin’.”

Despite confusion still overwhelming him, Jerry obliged and began to sing. 

\------  
Even though he was there under peculiar circumstances, it was nice to know that Green Gables stayed the same no matter the occasion. The green shingled room and starch white siding looked the same today as they did the first time he stepped foot on the property, which instantly calmed some worries he felt at the moment. 

“Woah,” Bash pulled Belle to a halt, allowing Jerry to slide down the side of the wagon and open the paddock gate. Once through the gate, Gilbert felt his fingers started to twitch once again. He hadn’t been to Green Gables in over nine months. Not since he had come to say goodbye to Anne, when he had secretly hoped she had reconsidered asking him to stay.

She didn’t.

But she did take him in her arms so tightly he felt as if he was going to burst. They held each other only for a moment, before she walked back into the house, closing the door behind her without another word.

The wagon came to a halt at the entrance of the barn and he threw himself off the back. “I’ll uh, put Belle up. You go on in,” he instructed, beginning to undo Belle’s harness.

He didn’t have to be told twice. In fact, he had to force himself not to bolt up the steps, past Marilla, and straight into Anne’s room. He stepped slow and steady, looking in every direction he could until he stopped just a few feet from the kitchen door, looking down at a cluster of dormant daylily cluster. 

_“You know, Green Gables is exquisite as is. However,” Anne wiped her brow, not realizing her forehead was now streaked with soil. “With Matthew gone, the world needs a little more color all around.” She whispered to the plants more so than Gilbert. He didn’t mind, he understood grieving better than most. It had only been a week since Matthews heart had failed him and Anne had been trying her best to cope in any way she could. Two days ago, she baked sixteen apple pies, claiming none of them were perfect and she had to keep trying to get it right. And yesterday, she wrote ten pages on why the Bronte sisters should have never had to pen under a man’s name and discussed society's oppression of women. Gilbert had actually thought the paper to be quite good and wanted to publish it in the paper before she tore it up and threw it into the stove_

_Today’s method of coping was flowers. She finished patting down the last of the soil and dusted her hands together. “There you are, my dears. Welcome to your new home.” Gilbert looked on as she gently nuzzled her face against each bud, admiring her love for nature and all things good. _

_After each bud had received the proper amount of affection, she attempted to stand, only to discover one of her feet had fallen asleep in the process of planting. “Oh no,” she stumbled as Gilbert reached out, grabbing her wrist and pulling her in the opposite direction of the fall. He accidentally pulled her too hard causing her to collide into his chest, sending them both crashing to the ground._ Okay, that hurt _he thought to himself as he rubbed the small bump that was beginning to form on his tail bone._

_Beside him, Anne lay face down in the grass, her shoulders shaking. Gilbert quickly sat up, grabbing her arm. “Anne? Oh God, Anne, are you alright?!” _

_She rolled over and he saw why her shoulders were shaking now: she was giggling. No, not just giggling. Laughing so hard that tears began to form in her eyes. “I..am...such...a clutz!” she yelled, barely able to form the sentence._

_Gilbert smiled, it was the first time he had seen her smile in a week. Her laughter was uncontrollable and he couldn’t help but join in, her laugh was so sweet that it was contagious. Together, the two lay on the ground, laughing insanely until their stomachs began to ache. After at least two minutes, the laughter began to die down, Gilbert resting his hand on his sore abdomen. Anne stared at the clouds above them as Gilbert turned to look at her. Tears began streaming down her cheeks but she didn’t look upset, she looked hopeful. _

_“Gilbert, do you think Marilla will like the flowers? She is so desperately sad.” _

_He turned his gaze to join hers, watching the clouds slowly move overhead. “Yeah, Anne, I think she will like them very much.”_

Gilbert pulled his gaze from the flowers and the memories they held when suddenly the screen door crashed opened to reveal a little girl who looked much older than when he last left. Bash’s face lit up excitedly, bending down, ready to hug his little girl. “Hello my little lo…”

“UNSEL GILBUR!” Gilbert barely had time to place his bag on the ground before the toddler launched herself off of the porch. He caught her, wrapping his arms tightly around the girls tiny body as fastened her arms around his neck.

“My girl!” He began smothering his niece’s face with heaps of kisses as her bushy curls tickled his cheeks. He had missed his niece horribly in their time apart from one another, feeling a piece of his heart was missing. She grabbed hold of his face, giggling, and gingerly placed a sloppy kiss on the tip of his nose.

“Well then,” Bash mocked hurt but was unable to hide a jovial tone behind his words. Gilbert allowed a chuckle to escape his lips when the screen door flew open once more, only this time revealing the harrowing Marilla Cuthbert. Wiping her flour covered hands on her apron in frustration, she began to scold the young girl.

“Delphine Lacroix, I have told you a hundred times not to…” her demeanor changed when her gaze met Gilberts own. “Gilbert Blythe, well aren’t you a site for sore eyes.”

Gilbert slowly lowered Dellie to the ground next to him, taking her small hand within his own. “Hello Marilla.” Tears formed in the older woman’s eyes as she took gently strides towards him, stopping when she was an arms length away. “You look well.” he bent down to kiss her cheek softly. Stunned, she reached her hands and grasped his biceps, letting the tears dampen her cheeks. 

“Look at you,” she scanned the length of his body, still in shock of the man that stood before her. “You left for Paris a boy, and they sent us back a man.” 

“Yeah, they also sent him back with a haircut that makes him look like a moke,” Bash lifted his daughter, who seemingly just noticed that her father was there. Marilla whacked the towel that had sitting on her shoulder against Bash’s arm. Dellie giggled when her father jumped “Ow, its true!” Bash and Marilla stared at one another before they too began to laugh.

Gilberts eyes moistened, unable to fight the happiness he was feeling at that very moment. He was home, truly home. Surrounded by people who loved him for the man he was, never asking him to be anything else. It almost made the anxiety he was feeling at that moment fade into a distant memory. Almost.

The moment was interrupted all too quickly by an intense coughing fit coming from the upper level of the house. Everyone silenced immediately as Gilberts heart fell into his stomach. “How is she?” He whispered.

Marilla shot a glance to Bash, who nodded in silent understanding. “Hey sweet girl, why don’t you go show me what you and Miss Marilla were workin’ on in the kitchen, eh?” Dellie quickly whipped her head back and forth, pointing over to her Uncle.

“Don’t worry Del, I’m not leaving,” Gilbert took his bag in his hand and pointed upstairs. “I just need to go check on Auntie Anne, alright?” Dellie contemplated his response for a brief moment before accepting it and pointed to the kitchen. 

“Go Papa!” Bash obliged, flying her into the kitchen as if she were a bird, letting the door slam behind them. Marilla’s eyes met Gilbert’s, so much fear sat behind them that it sent a chill down his spine. 

“This was in her coat pocket when Bash brought her home.” She slid her hand into her apron pocket and pulled out a handkerchief with tiny purple and pink flowers embroidered along the edges. Something so intricate could only belong to one person. She gestured it towards him, which he swiftly began to unfold to reveal a crimson spot in the center. Before he could stop himself, he inhaled sharply. Marilla, trying to remain strong, let a single tear roll down her cheek. “Does she have it? Does she have what the Gillis girl had?”

“I need to see her,” his voice cracking as he put the handkerchief into his coat pocket. Marilla nodded as they made their way up and through the door.

\----- ----

Gilbert rapped his knuckles against the door at the end of the upstairs hallway. “Come in,” a weak voice called from within the room. 

Taking a deep breath, Gilbert pushed gently against the door, eyes immediately shooting towards the bed. Much to his surprise, it was empty and panic began to set it. Quickly, he scanned the room, searching for the person he desired to see. He found her sitting near her window, wrapped in a thick quilt, staring out to the setting sun.

“I know that I need to stay in bed Marilla, but,” Anne let out a series of chesty cough that shook her entire body. Perfect flaming curls bounced against her back with each one. Gilberts stood silently, unable to find words for what he was feeling. “Sorry,” she whispered once the coughing had ceased. “But you know how I feel about sunsets.”

“I do,” he answered, somehow preventing his voice from cracking. Anne stiffened in her chair, holding her breath. Slowly, she rotated so that she was facing Gilbert head on. “Long time no see Carrots.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone, so I am trying to maintaining a schedule of updating twice a week. All of the love I have received for this fic has brought actual tears to my eyes. You are all wonderful <3
> 
> That being said, I have started chapter four and I am hoping to have it done by Sunday. However, my grandmother has suddenly passed today and my family and I must travel quite a ways to attend to affairs. I hope to see you all Sunday but just know, that if there is no update, that is the reason. Thank you all again for you outstanding support dears.
> 
> As always: find me on tumblr: onedayiwillflyfree  
Editor: Lil_Redhead (royalcordelia)


	4. Dear Anne

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all, I am beyond tired but I did it, I freaking did it. I am going to bed now.

Chapter 4: Dear Anne

_Dear Anne, _

_Oh how I wish you were here. Perhaps then, someone could finally describe the beauty that is Paris. But since you are not currently present, I shall do my best._

_The city is always bustling, always changing and moving, you never see the same face twice. Hordes of people fill the streets daily to sell their various wares. They peddle all sorts of items. Everything from trinkets and souvenirs to the finest jewels and silks. People are even selling food from their carts, just like they did in the streets of Trinidad. Every food you could imagine is available as you walk down the road. Cheeses, toasted chestnuts, fresh pastries, and (what I am sure would be your favorite) the most delicious chocolates. You would be in awe of the romantical culture._

_Speaking of romantical, Notre Dame is as stunning as your imagination described it to be. I have included a postcard, but it doesn’t quite do the actual cathedral justice. The glass is stained to be the loveliest colors of the rainbow. And the bells, Anne, are perhaps one of the loveliest sounds I have heard in my twenty years. One day, I hope you will be able to lay your eyes upon its beauty._

_I hope letter finds you well, Anne-girl. Give everyone my love._

_Take care,  
Gil_

———-

“Long time no see Carrots,” Gilbert said smirking. Anne, who had been rendered speechless, mouth sat agape. He chuckled, placing his bag on her nightstand and stepped toward his friend.

“Gil,” Anne whispered, finally finding her voice. “What are you…” She slowly pushed herself up out of the chair, only to begin to stumble forward. Gilbert dashed to her side, grabbing her hand and arm in support. Anne let out a wry laugh. “Heavens above, I am such a…”

“Clutz,” they finished in unison. Their gazes immediately found one anothers, hands still interlocked, and smiled. A warm feeling began to rush over Gilbert, as it did almost every moment they were together, as he felt Anne’s soft skin against his own. In the nine months since they had bid one another farewell, he worried that their friendship would begin to fade into the distance. That Anne would become just another childhood friend who would surely forget about the laughter they once shared. Yet standing there, being together once more, he could tell nothing had changed between the pair. He supposed that is what being kindred spirits was all about.

Anne let out a chesty cough, knocking the quilt off of her shoulders and ending the moment. Gilbert looked down at their interlocked hands and began to notice that the warmth he felt was different than the one he normally felt when he was around her. The heat was emitting from Anne’s body like an oven. He clenched his jaw. “Let’s get you to bed, Anne-girl, I imagine you’re tired.”

Surprisingly, Anne put up no arguments, leaving the quilt laying next to the chair as Gilbert led her over to her bed. He noticed she was leaning against him a fair amount, her muscles shaking with every step. She also appeared to have lost some weight, but he couldn’t tell for sure due to the flow of the nightgown. A blush creeped upon his cheeks as he caught himself staring at Anne’s lean body.

_For Lord's sake, Gilbert, she is just another patient. Assess her as you would any other. He scolded himself as he pulled down her covers to allow her to crawl under them._

“So,” Anne started as adjusted her pillows behind her to allow her to sit up. “You never answered. What are you doing here?”

“Are you serious?” he walked over to his bag and brought it to her bedside.

Anne rolled her eyes, giving a small, breathy laugh. “Oh, honestly, I am fine.” She cleared her throat and gently patted her chest as if something was stuck, “It’s just a little…” she hit her chest once more, only this time harder. “Cold,” her voice caught.

Gilbert chuckled. “Well, you had Bash so frightened that he practically ran to Charlottetown, so I suppose I had to come check if you were just wanting everyone to fuss over you or if you were just being…” He was interrupted by a series of coughs as they echoed through the room. “Dramatic.” he mumbled. Noticing a cup of steaming tea on her bedside, he handed it over to her, which she proceeded to take a large sip. She coughed once more, this time spitting the tea back into the cup.

He quickly took the cup from her as she patted her chest. As he went to put it down, he glanced into it, noticing a streak of thick mucus laced with blood. He swallowed hard, sliding the cup away from her eye line. Anne shivered.

Gilbert looked over to the quilt on the ground and went to retrieve it. Upon picking it up, he realized that it was the quilt Mary had made for him as a birthday present just months before her passing. The corners of his lips raised as he held it close to his heart. He had been unable to bring it to Paris with him, his trunk filled to the brim with medical texts and clothing. Before leaving, he brought it over to Anne, as she had always admired the craftsmanship and figured it would not go unloved in the months he would be separated from it.

“It kept me warm all throughout the winter,” Gilbert turned his attention towards the bed to see Anne staring back at him. “I suppose you’ll be wanting it back now,” Anne whispered, sadness creeping into her tone.

Gilbert smirked, rubbing the soft fabric between his fingers, before he throwing the quilt over her lap. “No, you keep it for a little while longer. You can give it back to me when you are feeling better.” He flattened the quilt over top of her, tucking her in as he would Dellie, allowing just enough slack so when she lay flat it would go up to her chin. “Then, when you return it, we could have a picnic in the orchard like we used too. I have sorely missed your apple pie.”

“I suppose Winnie would be joining us as well,” Anne mumbled, barely audible. Gilbert stopped, hearing envy drip from every word. He dropped his hands to his side in frustration.

“I suppose she would,” he turned towards his bag, pulling out his stethoscope and a thermometer, “Perhaps Roy would like to join us as well.” It came out colder than he intended but any mention of a certain Royal Gardner made his blood boil. When he turned towards his friend, a blush had crept upon her cheeks and neck. Although he was confused as to why she was upset, from what Anne had written him, the pair loved one another enough that they rushed their courtship and were set to be married early next spring.

She broke from his gaze, suddenly thoroughly intrigued with a lavender patch on the quilt.“Yes, I suppose he would.” Her voice was small. Gilbert softened his gaze, he didn’t mean to upset her. He stepped towards the bed, pulling a chair up along with him.

Once there, Anne met his eyes. “May I sit?” She nodded, gaze not leaving his. He sat close to the bedside, pulling the stethoscope from around his neck.”If it is alright with you, I would just like to have a listen to your lungs.” She nodded once more as he positioned it properly in his ears. “Sit up please Anne and take deep breaths when I tell you.”

She did as she was told and Gilbert pressed the stethoscope firmly against her nightgown by her upper lungs. He should have asked her to take it off but he didn’t want to embarrass her, so he decided to just do a quick exam while opting to do a full when Doctor Ward arrived. “Alright Anne, deep breath for me.” Please, please be clear he prayed silently as she obliged.

He almost let out a cry of joy when her lungs contracted normally. Joy consumed him as he moved the end to the lower right lung, asking her to breathe in again. As she did, she let out a hoarse cough. The lung rattled slightly, but not enough to cause worry. He continued the process with the left lung, pausing when an unfamiliar noise rang through his ears. “Can you take another big deep breathe and let it out slowly?”

Anne peered at him from the slits of her eyes, exhaustion had begun to set in. “Gil, can it wait? I’m so tired.”

“Anne, do it,” he didn’t mean to snap but he was trying to focus and didn’t need to argue with her at this very moment. Mustering every ounce of strength she could, she breathed in deeply, letting the air flow slowly through her lips. Gilbert’s throat tightened when her lungs sounded like a piece of paper being crumpled, ready to be thrown away.

As she let out the last bit of air, she wheezed causing her lungs to rattle even harder. “Gil,” she coughed as he pulled his stethoscope out of his ears and wrapped it around his neck. He met her eyes once more. Her eyelids slowly blinked, fighting to stay awake for another moment. “Finished?’ she asked half-heartedly.

“Yeah Anne-girl,” he took a pillow out from behind her and helped her lay back, pulling the covers up to her chin. “I’ll do more in the morning when the doctor arrives in the morning. You get some rest.”

He began to pack up his bag, opting to leave it there until morning, when he felt a tug on his sleeve. “Gil?” Her voice was soft as she began to slip off into the land of dreams. “I’m glad you’re here.” The words came out as a breathy whisper, Gilbert barely able to hear it. He smiled softly as he fought off the urge to brush a stray curl behind her ear.

“Me too, Carrots, me too.”

———  
As he made his way downstairs, Gilbert had to resist a smile as he was greeted by the sweet smell of Marilla Cuthbert's cooking. He looked on from the platform to see Marilla pouring stew into a large bowl, mumbling to herself. Bash sat next to the fire, playing with his daughters curls as she slept in his lap.

Bash looked over as Gilbert stepped off the platform and to the table. “How is she?” he whispered, not having any desire to wake the sleeping toddler.

“Asleep thankfully. Although, she does need a new cup.” He walked over to the sink, pouring out the contents of the teacup before Marilla could peer at its marbled liquid. She glanced up from the bowl she was pouring and met Gilbert's eyes, a million questions swimming behind them.

“Does she have it? Is Anne going to…” Marilla’s voice caught before she could get out the final word. Gilbert reached up to his hair before remember it was firm and unmoving so he brought it to his neck, rubbing tension knots out gently.

“Marilla, I haven’t graduated yet, I’m not allowed to make an official diagnosis…”

“To _hell_ with procedure Gilbert Blythe! You tell me right this moment: is my girl going to die?!” She snapped, throwing down the bowl of stew on the table, causing brown gravy to spill onto the table. Bash covered Dellies ears but she appeared to be unphased by the commotion, snoring lightly. The three of them stood silently. Regret filled Marilla’s features and she collapsed into the chair that stood before her. “Gilbert, I apologize...I don’t know what came over me.” Gilbert stepped towards her before pulling out the chair next to her and sitting, resting his hand gently on hers.

“Marilla, it’s alright.” Tears had once again welled in the older womans tired eyes. A silent understanding passed between the pair as she placed her other hand on top of his. They were all exhausted with worry and anything said in anger would be null. Gilbert squeezed her hand. “So, while I can’t diagnose her fully, I can say that I don’t believe she has consumption. When I listened to the upper portion of her lungs, here,” he gestured towards his upper ribs to help give context to what he was explaining. “They were clear.” Marilla’s free hand shot up to her mouth as she let out a cry of joy. Bash smiled, sighing in relief.

Gilbert wished he could share in their enthusiasm but after what he had just heard in her lower lungs gave him pause. “However,” he continued, their full attention immediately trained back to him. “Her lungs are making this crackling sound whenever she coughs or breathes and that worries me slightly.”

“What does that mean? Marilla questioned, her face paling.

“Well, rattling lungs paired with fever and headaches, along with a cough,” he cleared his throat. “It can usually indicate pneumonia.” Marilla bit her lip as she took in the information that was shared with her. Bash looked between the pair before he raised his hand slightly.

“What is pneumonia exactly?” he asked.

Gilbert squeezed Marilla’s hand once more, bringing her back to the conversation at hand. “Pneumonia is an infection within the lungs. There is no cure, yet, but it isn’t necessarily a…” Death sentence. He decided it best not to say it out loud, seeing as at the mere indication made Marilla lose all color in her face. The room became silent once more only to be interrupted by the sound of Gilbert’s stomach growling. Marilla smirked and slid the bowl of stew in front of him. He managed to get out a quick thank you before he began shovelling the flavorful stew into his mouth.

He felt joy course through him as the stew crossed his lips, as it captured all the essences of home. Bash’s special spice mixture, the earthy taste and feel of the carrots and potatoes from Matthew’s former garden, and Marilla’s sweet broth that would bring grown men to tears. The only thing that would make the feeling better is if Anne was sitting at the table with him, scolding him for forgetting to eat again.

Shoveling the last spoonful into his mouth, he dabbed the corners of his mouth with his napkin, realizing only now how much of a mess he made. Marilla and Bash stared at him, smiling. “Sorry,” placing his napkin next to his bowl. “I, uh, didn’t eat yet today.”

“Well that explains why you look so thin,” Marilla snatched the plate and proceeded to scoop it full once again. “Did they not feed you in Paris?”

“Oh, the food was wonderful.” _If only I had eaten it more often._ He hated to admit it, but while in Paris he would usually only eat once a day, sometimes not even that. Between the classes, lectures, activities Winnie had planned, and studying, most days he forgot to eat. It wouldn’t be until he would walk past a particularly fragrant patisserie that he would remember.

Marilla looked concern as he placed the bowl in front of him. He tried to push it away. “Oh Marilla, I couldn’t.”

“Gilbert, you may be a man now, but as long as you are under my roof,” she slid the bowl back towards him and shook his fork at him. “You listen to me. Eat.”

———  
“You know, I had almost forgotten how formidable Marilla could be,” Gilbert said, as he adjusted his grip on Dellie. The little girl had woken up not long after he had finished his second bowl of stew, only opening her eyes just enough to reach for her uncle before drifting off in his arms. Her head lay on his shoulder as her arms draped across his shoulders.

Bash chuckled. “The Cuthbert women are not to be trifled with, that’s for sure.” Gilbert smirked, adjusting Delphine once more. He was amazed at how much she has grown in such a short amount of time. It made him wonder how much else had changed, how much he had missed.

The pair walked in silence, both deep in thought. They were halfway home when Bash peered over to Gilbert. “Blythe?”

“Hmm?” He whispered, not wanting to stir Dellie.

“You think Anne is going to be alright?” Bash asked, matching Gilbert’s stride.

Gilbert sighed. “I believe so. The infection seems to be isolated in the lower portion of her lung, so as long as it doesn’t spread over the next few days, she should be fine.”

Bash nodded silently, as if to debate something. “And then you’ll be off at that point again I suppose?” Despite trying to hide it, a tint of resentment soured his tone, causing Gilbert to stop dead.

“Have I done something to offend you?” Gilbert asked, trying to keep his voice down.

Bash stopped a few feet ahead and brought his hand to his neck with a sigh. “Let’s not do this tonight.”

Gilbert tensed defensively. “No, if I have done something something to offend you, I want you to tell me.”

Bash spun around, allowing Gilbert to see the exhaustion on his brothers face. He realized now that the man before him had probably had as an exhausting day as himself. “Gilbert, I am tired. You are exhausted. I don’t want to fight. It’s a talk for another day.”

Gilbert opened his mouth to respond, knowing that he wouldn’t be able to rest until this was discussed, when Dellie lifted her head off of his shoulder. “No yell.” She whispered, half asleep.

Bash sighed once more as he stepped over to the pair and snatched Dellie from Gilbert’s arms. “No yelling, my sweet.” He kissed the top of her head then stared at Gilbert. “No yelling.”

————

Gilbert decided to let Bash and Dellie walk ahead, wanting to clear his head before he turned in for the evening. He held his lantern by his side as he strolled up to the house, admiring the comfort he instantly felt as he stepped through the fence that lay on their property line. Minus a single gas lamp lighting his bedroom, the house was dark.

_Bash must have already gone to bed...suppose we will talk in the morning._ He shrugged lightly, trying to push the anxiety aside he had felt since Bash’s comment.

He made his way towards the barn, peeking his head in to see that Bash had completely rebuilt the loft and stable doors. It looked incredible, better than any job that Gilbert could have done. Silently, he promised to help with whatever Bash needed over the next few days, as long as Anne’s health was improving.

Turning towards his house, he saw a second lamp had been lit in Bash’s bedroom. He swallowed hard, knowing that a fight was going to ensue when he entered his home. But part of him wasn’t worried because much like his arguments with Anne, Bash and he never stayed upset with one another for long. the house,

Entering through the threshold, nostalgia hit like a boulder. Nothing had changed within the house, every object in its rightful place, not even a kitchen chair out of place. Fresh apples sat in the center of the table, causing a sweet aroma to greet him, enticing him to grab one and take a large bite from it. Something about the taste of the fruit after dinner satisfied his sweet tooth that he never seemed to grow out of. He walked over to the stove, eyeing the cook book that Anne had beautifully created for Dellie. He gently stroked the cover and whispered, “Evening Mary.”

A floorboard creaked behind him and Gilbert spun around to face Bash, whose tired eyes fighting to remain open. “You know,” Bash began, Gilbert sucked in a large breath, readying for whatever he was about to be told. “Mary loved you like a brother.”

Well, I wasn’t expecting that. Gilbert closed his fingers around the book, smiling down at it. “As I loved her. She was my sister.” He turned back to Bash expecting to see a returned smile, but the man was the most serious Gilbert had ever seen him. Gilbert’s smile fell. “What’s wrong?”

“Just don’t let her down Blythe.” Without waiting for his response, Bash turned on his heels and made his way towards his bedroom, shutting the door lightly behind to not wake his daughter.

Don’t let her down? What does that mean? Gilbert wondered, putting the half eaten apple down on the table, staring into the dark hallway. He shrugged, deciding to put it off until morning. After the day he had today, he wasn’t sure how much more contemplation he could take. He grabbed a pitcher, filling it with water from the spout before he made his way down the hall. Before making his way into his room, he peeked in to check on Dellie, who was snoring happily while snuggling a rag doll. The corners of his mouth pulled, a soft smile forming.

_“Queen Anne, you didn’t need to bring anythin’ for Dellie,” Bash complained but in truth, he was smiling as Dellie cradled her new favorite possession. _

_“Well Bash, every little one deserves something that is all their own, made especially for them.” Anne stroked the little girls cheek as giggles filled the room. Gilbert listened from the hallway, Anne unaware of his presence. He observed her closely, memorizing every detail of that moment, and wondered how someone who has had a tragic start in life, be so wonderful. He knew that the man who would one day call her wife, and the children, who would one day call her mama, would be the luckiest group of people in the world._

_Anne looked up, meeting his eyes as she picked up Dellie, and smiled softly. Giving a soft wave, he prayed to whomever was listening that he would be able to be apart of her life then too. _

“Sweet dreams, Del,” he whispered, smiling as he shut the door gently. As he turned towards his room, he heard mumbled words coming from Bash’s room. Stepping closer, he debated one whether or not he would knock, almost bringing his free hand to the door when he heard words that halted him.

“Oh Mary, you would know what to say to him,” Bash whispered to his deceased wife. Gilbert lowered his hand to his side as he continued to listen. “I’m worried about him. He has changed and he doesn’t even realize it.”

Gilbert bit his tongue, feeling anger stewing inside of him. Unable to listen to anymore, he stormed off to his room, closing it tightly behind him. He went to his dresser, pouring water into the wash basin and splashed the cool water in his face. _I haven’t changed. Sure, I’ve matured, but I am still the same Gilbert John Blythe I was when I left._

He dried his face and caught his reflection in the mirror. Marilla wasn’t kidding. The last time he looked in the mirror, he was a boy, trying to be a man. His hair stringing over his eyes, his moss eyes full of wonder and courage. Now, with his slicked hair and fatigued eyes, he looked like a man of thirty rather than twenty. The pressed white shirt that Winifred had bought him in Paris made him look like he had come from a long line of land barons. Sighing, he leaned over the basin and began to pour water over his hair, slowly scrubbing the pomade away. After a few moments, he felt slick curls beginning to fall lose in his fingers.

When he looked back into the mirror, he smiled, seeing some semblance of his former self. No matter how fancy his clothes were, no matter how he changed his appearance, deep in his soul, he was still the boy with big dreams and not a dime to his name. And if he wanted to make those dreams come true, he would do whatever it took. He would simply just have to adapt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> be my kindred spirit (no for real, i need friends): onedayiwillflyfree (tumblr)
> 
> Editor: Lil_Redhead (royalcordelia)


	5. Dear Gilbert

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Grab your popcorn and tissues folks, your regularly scheduled program is back.

**Chapter 5: Dear Gilbert**

_ May 12th, 1901 _

_Dear Gilbert,_

_The Notre Dame is quite possibly more ravishing than even I could have ever imagined and I am ever so thankful that you decided to share it with me._

_Your letters have been most wonderful but I do find myself envious of your and Winifred’s time in the city of love, finding myself longing for an adventure all my own. Perhaps someday, I too will be able to journey to Paris. But I find that to be unlikely._

_Have you seen Diana since your arrival? She sent post that she was going to attempt to make her way to see you at her earliest convenience. She exclaimed she would love to take the two of you about the city with your final stop being the Louvre. If you decide to go, you simply must share your experience with me in your next letter. It is said to hold some of the most romantical pieces of art in all the world. _

_I certainly hope you are sleeping and eating properly, Gil. You have created quite the most horrible habit of over burdening yourself. Make sure you are taking time to take care of yourself but also taking moments to enjoy the beauty that is surrounding you throughout the streets of Paris._

_As for the going ons in our neck of the world, there is sadly very little for me to report. The orchards have begun to sprout lovely blooms as they do every late spring. Bash has done a brilliant job of replanting Mary’s garden fully, filling it with bright flowers and delicious vegetables. Dellie has become a master mud pie maker (they definitely look better than they taste). OH! She has also begun to create the most marvelous flower crowns, I even wore one to class the other morning and received the most cordial compliments. She is truly a kindred spirit, Gil. Hopefully you will be home before the blooms fade so she can make one for you._

_Oh Gil, I find myself missing your company horribly. No one can make conversation as lovely as you. No one challenges me or allows me to share my ideas freely. It’s been ever so lonely. I wish you would return home… I wish you weren’t marrying someone else and that instead, you could love me. But perhaps the biggest wish I have is that I could provide you with all of the happiness that Winifred brings you because Gilbert Blythe, I am most thoroughly in love with you. There. I said it. I, Anne Shirley-Cuthbert, am in love with you. I have been for as long as I can remember. Not a day goes by that I regret not telling you to stay. Not a day goes by that I wish I would have taken your face in my hands and..._

**Anne stopped writing as tears flooded the paper. “Oh Gil…” she whispered, longing for the man she knew she could never have. Why couldn’t she have been born into a family of rich businessman, into a family with connections and renown. Then, perhaps, she wouldn’t have had to leave him when he told her he wanted to stay. **

**Wiping her nose, she pulled out a new piece of paper and started the letter over, word for word, carefully trying to avoid soaking the page once more. Once she arrived to the final paragraph, she stopped, tears welling once more. She couldn’t say those words to him. Never. She had made her choice. **

**A knock came at the door. “Anne? Are you ready to go?” Roy’s sultry voice called through the closed door. Anne quickly wiped her eyes and nose once more. **

**“Almost,” she choked out, scolding herself for potentially letting on that she was an emotional wreck. She cleared her throat and adjusted how she was sitting in hopes to raise her confidence. “You go on ahead, I will join you all shortly.” **

**Roy shifted uncomfortably outside the door. “Are you sure? I don’t mind waiting.”**

**“I’ll only be a few more moments, I am finishing a letter to....” Her voice caught as a tear fell down her cheek once more. Anne silently prayed he wouldn’t hear it her voice shaking and ask her what was wrong. She wasn’t sure she could bear to answer him.**

**After a moment, Roy shifted once again, this time preparing to step away to give his fiancé the space she seemed to desire. “Well, don’t take too long, we have a boat to catch if we want to make it to Cole’s exhibit on time.” Anne heard retreating footsteps echo throughout Aunt Josephine’s mansion. **

**She sighed as she turned back to the letter, unsure of how to end it without making an utter fool of herself. Suddenly, a devilish thought came to her. The pen began floating across the page, words flowing from her that she never expected to write.**

_Oh, Gil, also I have some exciting news of my own. I was going to wait to inform you of this when you returned home but I simply cannot contain my excitement. I have met someone! His name is Royal Gardner (isn’t his name most divine). He is everything I had ever imagined my destiny to be. Tall, dark, handsome, incredibly smart, and the most marvelous of dancers. When we first laid eyes on each other, it was just as the novels had described: love at first sight. I am thrilled for the two of you to meet, I am sure you will get along swimmingly. _

_Take care of yourself Gil, and give Winnie my best._

_Your Kindred Spirit,_

_ Anne _

* * *

“Breathe in,” Anne obliged, breathing deeply as Doctor Charles Ward pressed his stethoscope firmly against her under clothes. Marilla stood perched in the far corner, eyes searching for any indication of how her girl was feeling. Gilbert, however, found himself feeling incredibly uncomfortable. 

A gentle burn crept upon his cheeks as he stared at Anne’s flushed face, his eyes fighting to glance down to her bare skin. _ Winifred, you are engaged to Winifred. Anne is just your patient and your friend. _ He had repeated the mantra to himself at least thirty times. Alas, the words did not appear to be sinking in. Because every time she would suck in a deep breathe, his eyes would stray to a particular freckle that lay just below her collar bone. _ Had that freckle always been there? _

Just as his straying eyes were about to search her for more unique markings, Anne focused her sight on him. He met her deep blue orbs, taking notice of how weary they were. Despite saying she had a full night of rest, the black under her eyes gave her away.

“Mr. Blythe,” Doctor Ward motioned for his assistant to join him. “Come here for a moment.” Gilbert felt his breathing catch.

“Uh sir, I, uh, had a listen to her, uh, lungs yesterday…” The words came sputtering out before he could stop them. The doctor glared up at Gilbert, which sent a chill slide down his spine. He may look like a man who had little to fear in this world, but the man who he had been apprenticing under for over four years had a way to wilt his soul. Mustering confidence, he regained his composure and pulled his stethoscope from around his neck. “Yes sir.”

Gilbert felt Marilla’s eyes bare into him with each step he took towards Anne, as if she could sense the conflict within his mind. Anne smiled gingerly as he took one final step to her side. Doctor Ward beckoned Gilbert’s ear and whispered, “Yesterday, you said that only her left lung was rattling, correct?” He nodded in response. Doctor Ward’s face contorted, his eyebrows scrunching together as he turned back towards Anne.

“Now Miss Shirley, I am going to have Gilbert listen to your lungs now. I need you to take a large breath and let it out over the course of ten seconds, do you believe you can do that?” Anne nodded, eyes slowly closing as if she were dozing off. “Good, now Gilbert, place your stethoscope here.” Before Gilbert could stop him, Doctor Ward grabbed the diaphragm of his stethoscope and placing it against Anne’s right lung.

As Anne was breathing in, annoyance crept into Gilbert’s soul. How could he be using Anne as a teaching moment. It felt wrong. Just as he was about to pull away, he heard the sound that had made him so fearful the previous day. Only this time, it was in both of her lungs. He didn’t want to continue to listen, for he shuddered at the thought of what the sounds meant.

Suddenly, Anne sprung into another round of wheezing coughs as she clenched her chest. “Anne, I need you to remain calm,” Doctor Ward helped her remain upright as Gilbert stood motionless, continuing to listen in horror. Soon Anne began to panic, fighting to catch her breath. “Gilbert, tell her to remain calm, she had to try and stabilize the cough.” But he couldn’t form words, all his thoughts focused on what he was listening to. Anne’s lungs were rattling like one of Dellie’s old baby rattles. Marilla sprang from the corner, closing the gap between her and the bed with a sprint.

“What’s wrong?” Marilla grabbed Anne’s free hand. Anne’s eyes desperately searched for Gilberts, desiring comfort and safety. When she finally found them, he could only see one thing: fear.

Gilbert ripped the listening device from his ears, throwing it on the floor as he tried to think of what to do. He kept his eyes locked with Anne as tears began rolling down her cheeks. In all the time the pair had known one another, he had only ever seen her afraid once, and at that time he had been able to save her. This time, fear was beginning to consume him as well. Through the fear, however, an idea came to him.

“Move,” he demanded, shoving his mentor to the side. Anne’s hand flew from her chest, frantically reaching for Gilbert as he positioned himself behind her, balling his hand into a fist. He brought his fist to the center of her back with one forcefully _whack. _

A ball of pus flew forward, narrowly missing the doctor before landing on the floor. Instantly, Gilbert heard Anne breathe deeply, pulling as much air into her lungs that she could manage. 

“Thank...you…” she whispered through heavy panting, reaching for his hand. Gilbert took her hand within his own, trying to not shy away at the burning of her skin.

“Not a problem Anne-girl,” he responded, giving her hand a brief squeeze. He began to move from behind her when she tugged his hand, almost begging him to stay.

“Gil,” Anne whispered, throat sore from the fit she just had. “Am I going to die?”

Marilla frightened eyes shot to Gilbert as he looked between hers and Doctor Wards anxious ones. Words caught in his throat, realizing that he wasn’t sure how to answer his friend. Could he tell her that he wasn’t sure? Would that bring her any comfort or would it just instill more fear than she was already feeling? 

He desperately wished that Doctor Ward would respond to her, give her all the answers she desired, but Anne had addressed him. She wanted the answer from the man she trusted perhaps more than anyone in this world. Because, despite how scared he was, she was petrified. And he knew that he would do whatever it took to protect her. 

Sliding from behind her, hands remaining clasped with one another, he took a seat facing her on her bed. “You’re going to be just fine…”

“Mr. Blythe,” Doctor Ward’s voice was harsh, frustration leaking through. 

Gilbert glared over his shoulder, demanding the man to silence himself, before turning back to his dearest friend sitting before him. “You’re going to be just fine, Anne.” Calm washed over him as the corner of her lips raised ever so slightly, her eyes drooping. He placed a hand behind her, guiding her into the pillows Marilla arranged ever so carefully behind her. “I promise.” He whispered as he pulled the covers over her shivering body. 

“_Gilbert._” Doctor ward scolded as Gilbert’s eyes shot to his. Coldly, his voice just above a whisper. “Hallway. Now.”

Without waiting for a response, he stormed out the door. Marilla and Gilbert exchanged glances. “Well, this should be fun,” he mumbled, giving a sarcastic eye roll for good measure. 

Marilla, who was attempting to remain stern but worry was consuming her, threw her head back towards the door. “You get out there,” she muttered as she sat on Anne’s bed, not releasing her hand for a single moment, eyes not leaving the resting woman before them. He hesitated, not wanting to leave the room, but he knew that as usual, Marilla was correct. 

“I’ll only be a moment,” he muttered before making his way into the hall, ready to receive his scolding.

\-------

“What was that?” Charles Ward bellowed as Gilbert gently shut the door behind him. He held a hand out, signalling for his mentor to lower his voice. He passed him, leading him past Matthew’s former bedroom, stopping at the top of the steps.

“What was what?” Gilbert asked, playing dumb.

“You know bloody well what,” The Doctor hissed, trying to keep his voice low. “You cannot promise a patient…”

“_She’s my friend _,” Gilbert shouted abruptly, fingers beginning to tingle as they did every time he felt frustration boiling within. He balled them, trying to focus his anger anywhere besides his voice. After a deep breath, he leveled his voice as he continued. “I simply had the desire to reassure her that everything was going to be alright.”

“Reassure her?” His mentor let out a dry chuckle. “I have always admired your ability to care for your patients but I fear your judgement is being clouded by this woman.”

Gilbert clenched his jaw, fighting the scream he felt forming in his throat. “My judgement is perfectly fine.”

“Really now,” Charles crossed his arms, speaking to Gilbert as if he were scolding a young boy rather than a man. “ What was her blood pressure last night?” Gilbert looked down, realizing he didn’t know the answer. “What about her pulse? Respirations? Temperature?”

“It was late, she was exhausted…” he mumbled. 

“_Exactly _my point, you are treating this girl as your friend. You”re allowing your personal relationship with this woman to prevent you from seeing what is truly happening!”

Gilbert turned to face Anne’s door once more. “Anne is going to be fine.”

“Gilbert, you cannot be that blind.” Charles response was frigid. “You are not the same boy who asked for my help so many years ago.” Gilbert opened his mouth to interrupt but Charles cut him off, wagging his finger in front of his apprentices face. 

“Now you listen to me, son, and you listen good. I have been doing this for a long time. I delivered your father, for Lord's sake.” At the mention of his father, Gilbert’s anger began to simmer once more, readying itself to overflow. “And I am telling you, I have never heard someone’s lungs as horrible as hers.” He threw his thumb in the direction of Anne’s door. “And by you sugar coating her diagnosis, you have done her a great disservice by not preparing her for what’s to come.”

Shock overtook rage and Gilbert found himself unclenching his jaw, trying to process what he had just been told. “Wait, wait, wait,” he sputtered, shaking his head. “Doc, you’re sounding like you’re prepping her death certificate.” He fought to meet his mentors eyes, looking for any indication that he wasn’t being serious, that Gilbert was right in thinking this was just a slight case of pneumonia. But Doctors Ward’s refusal to directly meet his gaze caused his stomach to plummet into the floor. “No.” He felt his knees slack, the room began to spin around him. Frantically, he reached for the nearest wall, feeling the need to stabilize himself before he fell down the stairs.

Charles reached out, grasping Gilbert’s arms tightly in his hands, pulled him away from the edge of the stairs. “Gilbert, breathe. _ Breathe. _” Doctor Ward began breathing in through his nose deeply, urging Gilbert to mimic him. He was unsure of when he had begun to hyperventilate but he forced his breathing to slow, matching his breathing to the man he had just been quarreling with. “Good. Good job.”

He straightened, vision ever so slightly blurred, his knees still shaking but he felt better than he had just moments before. Doctor Wards hand remained on his arm, shooting glances of remorse to his young apprentice. “I am terribly sorry son.”

“For what?” Gilbert questioned, genuine confusion filling his voice. Charles mouth sat agape, wondering if the young man before him had truly become delirious or was simply in shock.

“For the girl, of course.” He spoke each word slowly, articulating each word as if Gilbert was dim. 

Gilbert clenched his jaw. “_Anne _. Her name is Anne. And she is going to be fine.” He yanked his shoulder from the Doctors hand, anger was beginning to find its way back into his soul. 

Doctor Ward held up his hands defensively, once again speaking slowly. “Gilbert, son…”

“_Stop calling me son._” His voice boomed, Doctor Ward stepping back when his eyes peered down to Gilbert’s slowly forming fists. Gilbert had no idea where this anger was coming from, normally he was able to work through his emotions without it affecting anyone. And he had never minded Doctor Ward calling him son, the man has given him incredible opportunities and taught him many valuable lessons over the years. However, at the moment, it was insulting. He was treating Gilbert as if he didn’t understand the gravity of the situation. As if he didn’t just hear that Doctor Ward, the man who was supposed to try and save people, was signing Anne’s death certificate as she lay in the next room. This anger was different, this was pure, uncontrollable rage. “_You are writing her off after seeing her for all of five minutes. I have known her for six years! So do not speak to me as if I am allowing my judgment to be clouded when you are signing a death warrant without even trying to save her!” _

“Gentlemen!” A voice shrieked from the top of the steps. Both mens eyes shot to Winifred, both unaware of how long she had been observing them. She glided towards them, carrying an air of elegance but also an aura that would strike fear into the burliest brutes. “Now, gentlemen, I hate to interrupt this _discussion _ but,” she slid her hand down Gilbert's arm, wrapping his fist in her hands. “I do believe that if you so chose to continue, you should do it elsewhere.” Gently, she glanced over her shoulder, pulling Gilbert's attention towards Anne’s door once more, only this time, he found it open.. And within that opening stood a mortified Marilla, who looked as if she could faint at any moment. 

Rage melted away as remorse quickly took its place. He tenderly stepped towards Marilla, letting his hand slip from Winnie’s. “Marilla, I…”

“She...she’s asking for you,” Marilla managed to whisper as a tiny sob escaped her lips. Winnie pushed past Gilbert and took the older woman in her arms. Tears soaked her sleeves as she began to lead Marilla towards the steps.

Winnie peered over to Gilbert remorsefully. “I’ll make some tea, give you two some time.” Without another glance, she guided the sobbing woman down the stairs, leaving Gilbert alone with his mentor once more.

Charles rested a timid hand on Gilbert’s shoulder, giving it a light squeeze. “Would you like me to go with you?” Gilbert’s eyes remained focused on the door at the end of the hall as a series of coughs began sounding off. Despite the fight the pair had just had, he wished that Charles could come in with him, remembering that years ago, he left him to deliver the news to Mary that she was in fact dying and how difficult it had been. Gilbert had been furious with him for quite some time after that, so far as questioning his career choices, when it was Anne who reminded him why he wanted to become a doctor in the first place. It was Anne who reminded him that caring too much was always was the right thing to do. He owed this to her, to do anything in his power to help her fight this disease. 

“No, thank you sir. I will be okay.” He glanced over his shoulder, meeting Doctor Wards eyes. Slowly, he stepped down the hallway, stopping a few steps away from Anne’s door before turning back to see Charles still staring at him. “And sir, I apologize for my outburst.”

“It’s quite alright Gilbert, the news can be hard to handle.” Doctor Ward smiled softly. He had attempted the smile for comfort, but Gilbert felt the rage trying to make a reappearance. “I’ll explain to Miss Cuthbert, start having her make necessary arrangements for Anne.” Gilbert nodded, turning around before he would start shouting again. Instead, he escaped into his thoughts.

_You’re wrong this time Doc. She’s going to be just fine. You have never seen a more powerful force than Anne Shirley- Cuthbert._

\-------

“Knock knock,” he exclaimed audibly as he slid through the open door. Anne was still propped up against the stack of pillows, her eyes still fighting to remain open. Gilbert made his way over to the bed, sitting in the chair beside her bed. He had a feeling he would be sitting there quite often over the next couple of days. “Hey Carrots.” Anne’s eyes widened quickly, suddenly alert.

“Honestly Gil, do you think now is the best time for that?” Her voice was hoarse but he could hear the laughter that so often came when he used her despised nickname.

Gilbert leaned forward against her bed. “Well, I don’t see any slates around, so I suppose this is as good a time as any.” Through her exhaustion, Anne fought off a smile but it was to no avail. Her ocean eyes sparkled with glee as a small chuckle escaped her lips before it was joined by a chesty cough. He leaned forward, ready to sit her up if necessary.

She gave out two more coughs before she spoke. “You know, every time I cough, I can feel that crackling you mentioned.” She rubbed the side of her ribs, as if she could massage away the internal pain. His throat constricted and his cheeks began to burn. Anne turned to him, smiling weakly as she inched her fingers towards his, stopping just close enough their fingertips were touching. “Oh Gil, I’m alright. Calm yourself.”

He knew he wouldn’t calm down, not until she was out of this room. Not until he saw her walking through the forest, greeting each tree good morning and building crowns from the most beautiful blooms. Not until she was teaching young minds that the world is indeed larger than this small minded town they had been raised in. He wouldn’t be calm until he saw Anne, his dearest friend, be her remarkable self once again.

Gilbert’s eyes wandered to their fingertips, wickedly wishing he could take her hand within his own and hold it for the rest of his days. He longed to feel the comforting warmth of her skin against his own, the feeling only she had ever provided. 

But then his mind drifted to just below them, thinking of his fiance pouring tea for the distraught Marilla Cuthbert, doing her best to care for people she hardly knew. His thoughts proceeded to drift to Royal Gardner, the man who held Anne’s heart and hand, and would for the rest of their days. Anne and him, they were nothing more than childhood friends who had followed different paths. As much as it pained him, he knew that allowing himself to crave her touch was disgraceful.

Anne’s mind must have been processing similar thoughts simultaneously, because the same instant Gilbert went to sit back, she pulled her hand away and rested it against her chest. Her eyes, however, didn’t leave his as tears began to pool on her lower lids. “Sorry, I just..” she whispered. “I’m so terribly frightened Gil.”

Gilbert felt his own eyes moisten, wishing he knew how to comfort her properly. He would give anything to be the one in her place, fighting as his lungs were slowly filling with pus and fluid. A single tear escaped her lid, leaving a stained trail as it slid down her cheek._To hell with proper. _His hand shot towards her, pulling it from her chest and intertwined it with his own.

Electricity shot down his spine, but he fought the feeling. His friend was afraid and he planned to do everything in his power to comfort her and help her heal. No matter what it took. Anne took her free hand, reaching up to his face and wiping a stray tear he hadn’t realized was falling. “Gil,” she whispered, her voice catching. “Be frank with me.” He swallowed, squeezing her hand lightly, already knowing the question she was going to ask. “Am I…”

“_Get back here!” _ A voice screamed from just below Anne’s bedroom window. The pair exchanged glances, unsure of what demon had just been unleashed within the gates of Green Gables. “ _ You’re destroying your dress! This is not how a lady behaves!” _ Instantly, their faces shifted into amused smiles, all anxieties and woes melting away. The screaming voice could only belong to one woman: Eliza Barry. 

The kitchen door slammed below them, soon being followed by the sound of someone sprinting up the stairs. “What on earth..” Gilbert overheard Marilla cry from below as the door slammed for a second time. “Eliza?”

“Oh Marilla, my deepest apologies, I informed her about…”

The conversation was interrupted by heavy foot falls running down the hallway. Gilbert and Anne pulled their hands apart, him bringing it instinctively up to his curls. He peered at Anne from the corner of his eye to find her beaming when the door slammed open.

Gilbert was unsure he had ever seen Diana Barry look so frazzled in all his life. Her bun had loosened, allowing strands of hair to fall wildly around her face, an assortment of leaves and twigs sticking out every which way. And her dress, which he was sure cost more than what he made in a year, was now covered in brown sludge and had begun to fray at the bottom. He tried his best to stifle a laugh as she breathed heavily, eyes searching for Anne. For the first time since his arrival, Anne grinned ear to ear, appearing as if the presence of her bosom friend had cured her of all ails.

“My dearest Diana,” Anne called from the bed, trying her best to hold in a cough.

“Oh Anne,” Diana’s eyes filled with tears, a smile dancing on her lips. “My mother just informed me that you had taken ill and wouldn’t be able to make it today. I simply knew I had to come see you…” Diana began to step closer to Anne, when Gilbert stood blocking her from stepping any closer. “Gilbert Blythe, what is the meaning of this?”

“Well hello to you too, Diana,” he smiled, clearly bemused as his old friend tried to dance around him. “Diana, stop. Anne is very sick, highly contagious. You need to keep your distance.”

“Oh, so only you can be near her?” She asked clearly annoyed, Gilbert felt a blush creeping on his cheeks. “Now, _Doctor _Blythe, I have been half way around the world for the last two and a half years and if you do not move out of my way this instant, I will be forced to push past you, which would be most rude of me.”

Gilbert weighed his options. If he wanted to follow procedure, he would have Diana remain a safe distance away. It was his job to ensure the safety of those around him and not to spread disease. However, he had determined when he entered medical school that he would always put his patients' needs first. Which, at the moment, meant allowing his patients dearest friend through to hug her. 

With mock frustration, Gilbert stepped aside, allowing Diana to pass. Within a second, Diana threw herself across Anne’s lap, wrapping her arms tight around Anne’s torso. Tears began to stain Anne’s nightgown, Diana’s euphoric sobbing muffled within the cloth.

“I have sorely missed you, my dearest bosom friend,” Anne whispered, weakly pulling her arms around Diana as tight as she could. Gilbert watched the pair, unable to fight the smile he had been trying to suppress.

When the girls finally separated, Diana grabbed hold of her friends face, her smile falling instantly. She lifted the back of her hand to Anne’s forehead, recoiling at the heat emitting from her friends skin. “My Lord, Anne, you are burning up!” Her focus shifted to Gilbert, hundreds of questions swimming through her mind.

“I am so happy you are here Di,” Anne coughed into the crook of her arm. “I don’t know if I could bear the thought of not seeing you again…” Before she could finish, she coughed twice more, each one sounding worse than the other. Her lungs were forcing fluid up again. 

Her panicked eyes found Gilberts, who in turn ran towards her bed, helping her sit up fully to hopefully prevent her from choking once more. Anne’s breath started to catch once again. Her panic setting in as she latched onto his arm, digging her nails into his skin. 

“What’s happening,” Diana panicked, too terrified to move. Gilbert positioned his fist in the center of Anne’s back, fighting the pain he was feeling in his forearm from her nails. 

“Alright Anne, I need you to try and cough on the count of three. Just as we did before, remember?” Anne wheezed, nodding in understanding.

“Gilbert, what is happening?!” Diana shrieked. 

He ignored her, trying to maintain his calm as best he could. “Alright, one, two…” he lifted his fist high in the air as Diana’s face became void of color. “Three!” As his fist made contact with Anne’s back, she managed a weak cough, causing a thick ball of green mucus laced with streaks of red to fly from her mouth. The ball projected onto Diana’s skirt, trying to absorb into the fabric. Anne gasped, loosening her grip on Gilberts arm as she inhaled panicked breathes. “You did it, Anne-girl, you got it.” She leaned into him, exhaustion overtaking manners. 

“What’s wrong with her?” Diana asked, tears streaming from the corner of her eyes. Gilbert felt Anne’s breathing began to stabilize, slowing ever so slightly as she drifted off to wherever her dreams were taking her this time.

“Pneumonia.” Much to his dismay, he moved from behind her, leaning her back into her pillows once more. He adjusted them so she was sitting up a bit higher, pulling her blankets up to her chest. “Her lungs are essentially filling with fluid, so sometimes, when her lungs are trying to constrict and can’t,” He turned his attention towards Diana, looking down at the stain forming on her skirt. “Mucus forces it way out.”

Diana’s eyes joined his, though she didn’t seem to show much concern for the skirt. “Gilbert…is she…”

“No.” he replied curtly. Diana glared at Gilbert as he cleared his throat. “Sorry,” he mumbled. “But no, Diana, she is not going to die. I’m going to ensure it.”

Diana considered his response and found it satisfactory, knowing if anyone could save their Anne, it would be Gilbert Blythe.

She turned back towards Anne, clasping her hand within her own. “May I sit with her for awhile?” 

Gilbert hesitated, knowing if Diana was there, he would be expected to leave the room and he found himself petrified of what would happen it hr wasn’t around. “I don’t know Di..”

“Only for a little while.” Her eyes pleaded with him as he bit his lip, tempted to refuse her request. Diana glared at him, growing frustrated with his hesitation. “Besides, your fiancé is downstairs. I’m sure she would love for you to join her for at least one cup of tea.” The words were cold, she knew how to hit just the right chord to make him leave. Gilbert bit his lip once more, looking down at the sleeping fire queen before him and then over to the door.

“Alright, but I will be right downstairs if you need me.” When he was met with silence, he turned to make his departure, glancing back only for a moment to see Diana’s gaze had softened as she began humming Anne’s favorite hymn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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	6. Brothers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, please...don't hate me for this. Just bear with me because things are about to go down.

If it was up to Gilbert, he would make small talk against the law. He detested sitting in most formal settings, talking about unimportant topics like sermon or weather. To him, it was a waste of time. But since he wanted to be successful going forward in his career, he had mastered the art of keeping himself active in the conversation without actually caring what is going on. It just so happened to be what he was doing as Rachel Lynde was gossiping to a particularly disheveled Mrs. Barry. 

“Honestly, I still am in disbelief that the Pye’s let Josie go off to study in America. _ Alone, _no less.” Mrs Lynde gabbed as she switched her needle to continue knitting her scarf that was already about five feet long. 

“Yes, quite shocking indeed,” Mrs Barry responded halfheartedly, not looking at all interested in the gossip at this particular moment. She, in truth, looked almost as bad as Diana, her hair falling in strands, each curl frayed and pointing all different directions. Her skirt was covered in the same sludge as Diana’s, but luckily it appeared to have remained intact. Honestly, Gilbert was surprised at how calm she was behaving, half expecting her to have dragged Diana out of here by her ear. But when he caught the glimmer of a single stray tear, he realized she must have been informed of just how gravely ill Anne was. 

She turned to Sebastian, who until now seemed to have gone unnoticed in the conversation, and politely asked how Dellie was doing. “I half expected her to come running down the hall when I heard you come through the door.”

“Ah, me mother decided to teach her how to make apple loaf this morning,” Bash smiled as if the thought amused him. Dellie, who was as smart as Gilbert, strong as Mary, and witty as Bash, had certainly given Hazel Lacroix a run for her money over the last three years. She would often try to scold the young girl only moments before they would break down into a fit of giggles. Throughout the years, she had truly turned into a loving and fun grandma, teaching Dellie all about spices and traditional recipes, and would chase her all about the orchards. It was truly a sight to behold. “She wanted to be here, fighting me tooth and nail to come see Queen Anne, but of course, she needs her rest now. ” Bash peered over to Gilbert sitting beside him on the couch, tension still brewing.

Unfortunately, the pair hadn’t had a moment alone to finish their conversations from the previous evening. Gilbert was woken up, before the sun had even begun to kiss the horizon, when he was pounced on by an over excited three year old, who wanted to introduce him to the farms newest calf. _ “Gilbur, Gilbur! See Nina, see Nina!” _She had chanted all the way out to the barn, where they proceeded to play with the calf until the sun finally decided to wake. However, by then, it was time for Gilbert to greet Doctor Ward and Winifred at the station.

“Well she is very fortunate to have such a...wonderful relationship with...” Mrs. Barry’s voice caught. She couldn’t seem to say her daughters beloved friends name, fearing she might start to cry.

“Anne,” Mrs. Lynde finished for her, as she began pearling the new row. “For Lord's sake, she’s sick, not dead.” Conversation ceased after that, the silence broken only by the sound of Rachel’s needles clacking against one another.

A gentle pair of footsteps sounded down the hall as Marilla stepped through the entrance of the parlor with a tea tray filled with cookies and slices of Hazel’s apple loaf. Winifred trailed closely behind, anxiously watching as the tray shook with each step. “Miss Cuthbert, I really insist you let me carry this.”

Streaks of tears stained Marilla’s cheeks and her eyes puffed so much, Gilbert was unsure of how she could see two feet in front of her. “Nonsense,” Marilla sniffed. “You are a guest in my household and I will treat you accordingly.” She gently placed the tray down on the table, flipping over each teacup carefully. “Please sit, Miss Rose.”

Winnie hesitated, looking desperate to help in anyway. “Miss Cuthbert, I honestly...” Marilla shot daggers towards the young woman.

“Winnie, I wouldn’t argue with her on this,” Sebastian warned, standing so that she could take her place next to Gilbert. Winnie hesitated only for a moment before she decided the fight wasn’t worth it 

“Very well.” She smoothed her skirt before she settled into the spot next to her fiancé.

Marilla cleared her throat as she picked up the tea pot, the lid rattling from her unsteady hands. Her eyes had begun filling once more as she attempted to pour the tea. Gilbert felt his breath to catch when he noticed daisies elegantly placed within the porcelain. It was the teapot that Marilla had promised to give to Anne for her own parlour one day. 

“This has always been her favorite.” Tears began to stain her cheeks once more as Mrs Lynde exchanged a look with Gilbert. “I figured it may bring her luck...” Her hands were uncontrollable now as Gilbert and Rachel stood.

Gilbert stepped forward, placing a tender hand over top of the sobbing woman. “Marilla, I believe that you forgot the honey. It would taste most wonderful with the apple loaf, would it not?” He slid the pot from her hand, holding it tightly within his own. 

“Yes, honey, of course. How silly of me. I’ll be back in a...” Another sob escaped her lips as Rachel held onto her, slowly guiding her from the room. The room was silent once more, the sound of Marilla’s sobs echoing throughout the house. Gilbert cleared his throat, turning his attention towards the cups and began pouring a fair amount of tea in each, knowing that he had stopped being a guest at Green Gables long ago.

“Mrs. Barry, how do you take your tea?” he asked politely, just loud enough to drown out Marilla’s cries.

“Oh, a little milk, please,” she whispered, tears welling within her own eyes. He did as requested and handed her the cup along with his handkerchief. “Thank you.” 

He smiled, turning back towards the tray where he prepared everyone else’s tea from memory. Winifred a dash of milk and a single cube of sugar, Bash no milk and three sugar cubes, handing them each their cup before filling his own. Silently, he wished he had grown out of his sweet tooth as he plopped six sugar cubes into his tiny cup. Just as he was about to take his seat, Mrs. Lynde returned to the room, waving a hand at him to sit while she prepared her own tea. As she took her seat, Gilbert noticed the sobs had subsided and the room was silent once more.

Each person sipped their tea, no one wanting to speak first until finally, Mrs Lynde took the initiative. “So Winifred...” Winnie straightened, all of her etiquette training making an appearance. Gilbert brought his cup to his lips, only slightly relieved that he wasn’t the one to be addressed. “How have wedding plans be going?” she asked, taking a small sip of her tea.

Gilbert choked, tea spilling from his mouth back into his cup. How could he have completely forgotten once again that he was supposed to be sitting with Winifred’s parents in Charlottetown? The wedding was still nine months away, two weeks after his graduation, but it still continuously slipped his mind. All eyes shot to him as he put down his cup on the table and wiped the corner of his mouth. 

“Sorry,” he mumbled. “Hot.” No one questioned it, despite all of their tea being poured around the same time. The only one who didn’t seem to believe him was Bash, who stared at him just a few seconds longer than necessary.

Winnie smiled at the silliness of her fiancé before turning her attention back to Mrs Lynde. “Truth be told, between all the travel and his studying, we simply haven’t made the time,” she replied politely, taking a small sip from her cup. “We were due to be meeting with my family to discuss florists and possible venues…”

“You’re not gettin’ married here?” Bash interrupted, the women in the room glaring at him. The question had been directed at Gilbert more than Winnie but she answered for both of them.

“Well, it had been considered but we wanted to keep our options open,” she continued calmly. “There is this most lovely church up in Nova Scotia…”

Bash interrupted once more. “Did Gilbert tell you that every person in his family has been married in the orchard for the last seventy five years?” Gilbert glared at his brother, unsure of where these outbursts were coming from. 

“Well, yes he did…” Frustration was creeping into her voice as she peered over to Gilbert looking for support. 

Bash’s eyes met Gilberts, anger simmer behind them. “And you’re okay with breaking that tradition, Blythe?” Gilbert swallowed as all eyes in the room fell to him once more.

“Uh, well if that’s what my bride wants, then yes,” He tried his hardest to hide the disappointment in his voice. Truth was, when Winnie first brought up where they should get married, he had suggested the orchard. But her mother had quickly shot down any thoughts of them getting married in Avonlea, claiming it would be too far for their family to travel. Bash shook his head in disbelief as he sat back in his chair, pulling himself from the conversation.

“Well, I think it is lovely that Gilbert wants to appease her,” Mrs. Barry spoke for the first time, breaking the awkward tension. She continued, addressing Winnie. “You said you were supposed to meet with your parents this weekend?” 

“Well yes, but when we heard about...” her voice trailed off not desiring to bring the tension back into the room. “Well, I phoned them to cancel but they decided to come anyway, so I will be joining Charles on the six forty five train out this evening. My mother is worried we will run out of time.” She giggled, as if the wedding was still years away. “At the moment, I am more worried about Gilbert and his studies.”

“Ah yes of course. And Gilbert how are your studies going? Well, I assume?” Rachel asked, turning towards him.

_If you mean getting three hours of sleep an evening and forgetting to eat most days well, then yes, they are going well _. He politely replied, “Yes, they’re moving along rather well. The semester at Sorbonne and all the seminars truly helped expand my knowledge. There is still much for me to learn, but that will be ongoing my entire career. Medicine is ever changing and evolving.” He suddenly felt giddy, he was in his element. “Oh, did you know that a man recently discovered an antitoxin for diphtheria? He even won an award for it...” Winnie cleared her throat, pulling Gilbert from his rant to notice Mrs. Barry and Mrs. Lynde looking utterly confused. “Oh, apologies, I tend to ramble...”

“His professor adored his passions,” Winnie cut him off, saving him as she so often did. “Some even offering to keep him at Sorbonne for the rest of his studies.” Gilbert shot a look to Bash, who suddenly seemed to be interested in the conversation again. 

“Well, it seems that Blythe seemed to neglect that in his letters...” Bash mumbled, slowly bringing his cup to his lips.

Winnie laughed stiffly, fearing that she was beginning to say too much. “Oh well, you know Gilbert. Always the humble one.” She looked over to him as he reached forward for his own cup, needing something to ease his anxiety.

“Well he should have every right to boast about himself,” Mrs. Lynde continued, oblivious to all the tension that was somehow building itself back up. “He was the smartest student in all of Avonlea, say of course minus Anne, but he was also known to be the most handsome boy around.”

Mrs. Barry nodded in agreement. “Absolutely, a part of us had always hoped our Diana would catch his eye, but you beat her to it Miss Rose.” Winnie smiled proudly, bringing her cup to her lips.

Gilbert shifted uncomfortably, he despised being spoken about like he wasn’t in the room. He sipped his tea as Mrs. Lynde chuckled lightly to herself. “Why, between the two of you, I suppose you will have the most beautiful children in all of Avonlea.”

Gilbert choked on his tea once more, only this time, he began to wheeze as it shot down the back of his throat during a cough. All four pairs of eyes shot to him once more as he put his cup down on the table, trying to catch his breath. 

“Are you alright?” Winnie whispered to him as he held up his hand. He cleared his throat, feeling some relief.

“Yes, quite,” He managed to whisper before having to clear his throat again. “Apologies.” Winnie smiled, placing her hand gently on top of his in comfort.

Mrs. Lynde stared at the pair stunned. “My apologies if I have spoken out of turn, I simply assumed that the pair of you wanted children.” 

“Well, of course...” he mumbled, unsure of how to finish his answer without creating tension.

Winnie, unaware of the consequences of her words could cause, finished for him. “It’s just that we will not be returning to Avonlea once Gilbert finishes his studies.” 

_Oh no. _ Gilbert’s attention immediately went to Bash. 

“What?!” Bash’s voice boomed, slamming his tea cup on the table beside him, causing everyone in the room to jump. Winnie cast another glance over to Gilbert, biting her lip, realizing she had said too much. Marilla ran into the room with a jar of honey in her hands, her face a darker shade of red than it had been only a few moments prior.

“What is the meaning of this, Sebastian?” Marilla questioned, looking to anyone for answers, but no one spoke. 

“What do you mean you aren’t returnin’ to Avonlea?” he cried, ignoring Marilla as he rose from his seat. “Nine months, that is what you told me when you left. Nine months and then you would be back in time for harvest.”

Gilbert stood, slowly stepping towards his brother. “Bash...”

Bash was now pacing about the room, trying to not let his temper get the better of him. “But I suppose since you already skipped out on that, I shouldn’t be surprised that you want to skip out on us forever.”

“Bash, if you would let me explain…”

“Why?” Sebastian stopped pacing, looking to his brother accusingly. “You just going to spout more lies?” 

Gilbert winced. “No, I wanted to tell you in person...” 

Bash held up a hand, stopping Gilbert from continuing. “Save it. I need to get back to the farm, _ our _farm.” He turned to leave, stopping only to place a gentle hand on a stunned Marilla’s shoulder. “Apologies for the commotion Miss Marilla, if you need anythin’, don’t hesitate to ask.” He glared over his shoulder. “We’re family after all.” 

“Bash, please,” Gilbert stepped towards him once more, reaching out to stop him but he was too late. He had already made his way to the door, not even stopping to grab his coat before he slammed the door behind him. 

“My…” Rachel held a hand up to her chest. “I never knew Sebastian to have quite a temper.” Mrs. Barry looked on horrified as Marilla threw herself into a chair, confused and exhausted.

Winifred stood, placing a gentle hand on her fiancé’s shoulder. She squeezed it apologetically before she whispered, “Go.” 

Gilbert didn’t hesitate as he ran to the door, stopping only for a moment to grab Sebastian’s coat before leaving behind his fiancé to mull over the whole situation. 

—————

“Bash!” Gilbert called as he sprinted down the path leading away from the house. Bash had already almost made it to the fence, each step filled with purpose. “Sebastian, please!” His voice cracked as Bash continued to ignore him. He continued his pace despite the burning sensation forming in his lungs. _ When did I get so out of shape? _ “Stop!”

He caught Bash’s shoulder. Without slowing down, Bash ripped his shoulder from Gilberts grip, attention still focused on the gate that stood ten feet away. Gilbert slowed his pace before stopping fully to catch his breath. “Would you just let me explain?” No response. “I’m your brother, aren’t I?”

Bash halted, hands clasping into fists at his side as he turned to meet Gilbert’s gaze. A mixture of fury and heartbreak played on his face as he spoke, every word dripping with sadness. “I thought you were.” Gilbert thought he saw glistening in the other man's eyes, but he was too far away to tell. “But ever since you left, I don’t know you anymore. And it’s more than you lying to me about when you were coming home.”

“What are you talking about?” Gilbert questioned despite partially knowing what his brother was referring. 

“Oh don’t play dumb with me Blythe,” he stepped closer as he spoke, closing the gap with a few large strides. “When I saw you yesterday I didn’t even realize it was you at first. And it was more than just that stupid hair style of yours, which just so you know, made you look ridiculous.” 

“It makes me look more professional.” Gilbert replied defensively. 

Bash let out a throaty chuckle. “It makes you look like a schmuck and you know it.” Gilbert bit the inside of his cheek, trying to remain calm and keep the anger at bay. Bash smiled, realizing he was dancing on a nerve. He took one more step, squaring his shoulders to Gilbert’s. “And the only reason you are wearing it like is because your rich girl thinks it will help you fit in with her schmuck friends..”

Gilbert’s cheek began to bleed. “Well, if I want to be taken seriously by my peers…”

“Do your peers know you’re an orphaned farm boy?” Bash continued, his anger becoming increasingly apparent. “Or about your black niece who would crawl into bed with you whenever she had a nightmare, because me slipping your mind, well that is forgivable, but Delphine? The Gilbert I knew would be braggin’ about her to anyone who would listen.”

Shame consumed him as he realized Bash was right. Over the last nine months, he had made no mention of his brother or his niece. He felt no shame of them but whenever the topic of family arose, he found himself silent, usually allowing Winnie to answer for him. And when he was alone, he simply mentioned that he was marrying into the Rose family and that was all the information anyone cared to know about him. 

Bash swiped his thumb across his lips, laughing dryly once more as Gilbert fumbled to form words. “And the truth comes out.” Bash laughed once more as he ripped his coat from Gilberts grip, heading on his way once more. 

Gilberts hands formed fists, tensing so tightly that he soon felt the blood drain from them. He was livid. 

“You told me to go, that you supported me.” Gilbert shouted to Bash’s back as he started closing the distance.

“That was before it changed you,” Bash mumbled, not stopping or even giving a glance to Gilbert.

Gilbert ran in front of his brother, forcing him to face him. “You told me we would always be brothers. Why has that changed now that I am trying my damndest to live my dream?

“Oh yeah?” Bash stepped closer, squaring up with Gilbert again. Only this time, Gilbert could feel the rage radiating off of his body. “Lying about your family, using a rich girl for her money and connections...”

Gilbert resisted the urge to punch the smug smile off of Bash’s face. “How dare you. I care for Winnie deeply.”

“But you don’t love her!” Bash screamed. “Anyone with eyes can see that Blythe! And honestly, what you’re doing, it’s just wrong!”

Gilbert exploded, “Just because I actually courted her properly rather than taking her on a couple of walks and then bedding her after two weeks doesn’t mean that I don't care about her!”

Tension hung in the air so thick it could be cut with a knife. Gilberts mouth hung open, in utter disbelief of the words that came from his mouth, unsure if he would ever be able to atone for them. 

Bash’s face was void of emotion as he took wobbly steps away from him. “Bash... I...” Gilbert tried to reach for him, but quickly pulled his hand away as he realized how horrible of an idea that was. He had no idea of where the words had come from, he had never felt that towards his family. Mary… Mary was his sister, the love of his brother’s life… how could he had said such cruel words. _ What is going on with me? _

Gilbert wished Bash would say something, anything to let on what he was feeling at this moment... But no words came. Only prolonged silence.When Gilbert couldn’t take the silence any longer, the words came out in one frantic breath. “Bash, punch me, tackle me. Do something. Say something.” Bash met his eyes, Gilbert saw no rage, no anger. Just sadness. “Bash, I’m so sorry…”

Bash remained silent, glancing up towards Anne’s room as he pondered his response. After a moment, as if he recalled a distant memory, his mournful eyes met Gilberts one final time. “You make her better, then we’ll finish this conversation.” Without waiting for a response, he spun around, slamming the gate of the fence behind him. 

————

Gilbert, despite his worry for Anne, had no intention of returning to the house immediately, knowing he would be bombarded with questions that he wasn’t ready to answer. Instead, he made his way towards the barn. His adrenaline was causing his fingers to twitch and he needed to calm himself before he could be any use to Anne. And he knew just how to do it.

Upon entering the barn, he realized that he had two companions rather than the three he had expected. _Jerry must have taken Midnight out in the fields. _A loud whiny came from beside him, causing him to jump. “Butterscotch! You have got to stop doing that buddy.” He reached up, Butterscotch meeting him half way as he nuzzled his nose within Gilberts hand. Instantly his nerves began to calm. Gilbert had missed many things in his time away from Avonlea but other than the people, he most missed being with the horses. “How you been doing?” Butterscotch snorted, desperately trying to convey his frustrations. Gilbert smiled sadly, understanding what the colt was meaning. “Oh, don’t get too upset with Anne, she would much rather be out here with you. What do you say I give you your brush today?” The colts ears perked as Gilbert walked to retrieve the brush, turning back to discover Belle had made her way over, gently nudging her foal out of the way. Gilbert rolled his eyes as he laughed. “Alright jealous, calm down.” Spying a bag of sugar cubes sitting near the stall, he grabbed two, putting one in front of Belles nose. “You’re still my best girl.” 

She seemed content with his praise and offering, taking the cube with a soft snort before walking back over to her corner. His attention turned back to Butterscotch, who now impatiently waiting for his sugar cube. “You get yours _ after _.” He led the young colt out, tied him to the rail and began to run the brush along the horses back, retreating into his thoughts.

_What’s wrong with me? My temper… my temper is never uncontrollable. But that is twice today… both with people I care for dearly. Is it… because I’m worried… no, that’s crazy. Anne’s going to be fine. Just fine. _ Gilbert bit his lip, worry suddenly consuming him. He had only been away from her for a half an hour but he couldn’t stop the feeling in his gut that this wasn’t the worst to come, that she would get much worse before she got better… if she did get better. _ No you idiot, she will be fine… she will worsen over the next few days… pneumonia works its way through the body fast. Her fever should peak in a couple days. Which means I need to make sure we have enough pain meds to keep her comfortable. Also clean water, rags..._

“_ There _ you are,” He resisted the urge to jump, not wanting to scare Butterscotch as Diana called from the front entrance of the barn, annoyance dripping from every word. Winnie stood to her left, her hands gently fidgeting.

“What’s wrong? Is Anne okay? Why aren’t you with her?” He dropped the brush beside him, ready to sprint up the stairs if need be but Diana rolled her eyes. 

“Oh, calm down Gilbert.” She entered the barn, Winnie trailing directly behind. “Marilla is with her. She’s as fine as she can be right now.” Sadness crept into her eyes only for a moment before the irritated expression returned. _ Why is she so angry with me? I haven’t done anything to her... _“Anne asked me to have you fetch something for her.” Diana held out her palm. Gilbert stepped forward to see a gold chain with a half locket and a key sitting in her palm. “She said you would know where to find her treasures.” He swallowed hard, taking the key tightly in his hand, knowing exactly where he needed to go.

“It’s a little far…” he mumbled, concerned about traveling that far from her.

Diana’s face softened for the first time, understanding he was just as worried for their friend as she was. “I will stay with her until you get back.” She smiled genuinely, putting some of his worries at ease. “Besides, Winnie hasn’t seen that much of Avonlea, I’m sure she would love to see where you grew up.”

Gilbert considered it, he hadn’t thought about how little he had actually shown Winnie of his home. “Would you like to join me?”

Her face lit up. “That would be lovely.”

———

Even though he had not wanted to be far from Anne, he did find himself relaxing the longer he spent time with his bride to be. Throughout their time in Paris, the pair had learned a great deal about one another and Winnie’s company was always pleasant. Although, at the moment, he did feel bad about dragging her through the mud on their way to the school house.

“Sorry, I didn’t expect it to be this wet.” He apologized for the third time, helping her over yet another large puddle. 

“Gilbert, honestly, stop apologizing.” She jumped over the puddle with elegance, as if she had done this a hundred times before. “A little mud never hurt anyone before.” He smiled as she laced her arm within his once more. “So this is the path Anne used to take every day to get to school?” 

“Mhm,” Gilbert nodded. “Normally Diana and her would meet at the crossroads and walk together. Although, on occasion…” Gilbert’s words trailed off, coming across a clearing that always had given him pause. 

_Gilbert had absolutely zero desire to leave his father. None at all. But John Blythe, in his best strict tone, had said that if Gilbert didn’t go to school then he would have to write a five page paper on the symbolisms within Romeo and Juliet. As much as Gilbert enjoyed the play, English had and never would be his strong suit and he preferred to do it as little as possible. So, with the promise from his father that he would stay in bed, he grabbed his favorite scarf and cap before rushing from the door. _

_It had been a year since he had lived in Avonlea but the beauty hadn't changed in the least. The leaves were falling from their trees, decorating the ground orange and yellow. The birds were singing soft tunes to one another as they prepared to migrate. It was such a comfort to know that nothing had changed too drastically. _

_“Sorry, I truly meant no harm. I…” he heard a quivering voice cry. He turned slightly, trying to find the owner of the voice when his eyes made contact with the back of Billy Andrews, who had grown about five inches since Gilbert last saw him. _

_“I’m gonna teach you a lesson, Fido.” His voice came out like poison, each word designed to instill terror into its victim. Even though Gilbert couldn’t see who he was talking to, he knew something had to be done. Billy had a habit of picking on those he deemed unworthy, often making jabs about Gilbert’s dead mother when they were younger. Of course, that was before Gilbert had grown into his harsh jawline and grown a solid ten inches since he left. He quickly made his way over to the pair, just in time to hear the victim tripping and dropping a stack of books on the ground. “You’re a bad dog. Bad little dog.”_

_“Hey Billy!” Gilbert shouted, causing the bully to pull his attention towards him. Little did he know then that one simple act would change his life forever. _

“Gilbert? Darling? Are you alright?” Winnie asked, pulling him from the memory. 

“Yes, just remembering something.” He smiled, not wanting to worry her. She politely smiled back, concern filling her eyes. They continued their walk, Gilbert making it a point to tell her random memories and facts about Avonlea along the way to help ease her mind. Shortly, they arrived at the simple white schoolhouse. 

Winifred stifled a laugh. “This… this is where you went to school?” 

Gilbert smirked, remembering Winnie grew up in a large city. “Well, not this exact building, but the same design and concept.”

“What do you mean not this building?” She questioned as they made their towards the steps, stepping over the occasional apple. “Is there more than one?”

Gilbert laughed, picking up a stray apple core that had become a snack for a stray deer. “Well, the school house that I actually attended was set on fire a few weeks before our Queens entrance exam.”

Winnie’s eyes widened in horror. “Why would someone do something so cruel?” 

“Anne,” he said surely, tossing the core far into the fields. Winnie’s eyes were bulging from her head, anxiously awaiting for him to continue. He cleared his throat. “Remember how I told you I was a co-editor of our towns local paper?” She nodded slowly, listening patiently. “Well Anne just so happened to be the other editor, and after a particular act of injustice,” he silently kicked himself whenever he thought about his lack of action the evening of the fair, “she decided to call out Avonlea for their small mindedness. At the time, I was furious with her for not consulting with me before she published it...but then I read the article. Truly read it. And honestly, it’s one of the greatest pieces of literature I’ve ever laid my eyes on.” He smiled, thinking back to when he first began to understand what Anne had meant with her words. 

Winnie stared at him, his smile contagious. “Well, I hope for the opportunity to read it then someday.” He could hear in her voice that she genuinely meant it. “I did quite enjoy the stories she would send you while you were away. She has a special way with words.”

Gilbert nodded solemnly, his slight bit of joy disappearing as he remembered why they were there. “She does indeed....” He walked over to a vibrantly painted plant box and pulled out the spare set of keys Anne always kept hidden within it. He slid the key into the door, hesitatingly. It felt wrong entering the schoolhouse without her but she had asked him to fetch her most important possessions, so he took a deep breath and turned the key. 

The door let out a loud creak as it opened. Upon entry, Winifred whispered “Oh my.”

The school house may have looked exactly the same on the outside, even the desks remained in their normal rows on the inside, but Anne had truly turned her classroom into her own sanctuary for learning. Miss Stacey had made learning fun, Anne made it magical. Potted plants lined the walls, each one painted differently by one of her students. Eccentric cloth hung from each of the window tops, embroidered with different equations and the alphabet. Gilbert smiled, remembering when she had asked him to come help her hang them because _ “even with a chair, I’m still much too short. Otherwise I wouldn’t require your assistance for such a trivial task.” _

“This is incredible,” Winifred whispered in disbelief as she took timid steps into the room. Gilbert followed her, looking about the classroom despite having memorized it before he left. 

“When Anne was in the orphanage, she didn’t get the opportunity to go to school,” Gilbert reminisced, walking farther into the room. “And when Mr Philips was our teacher, he wasn’t exactly… great. So she made a promise to herself when we graduated from Queens that she wanted to make it a place for children to fall in love with learning as she had. So when our old teacher, Miss Stacey, told Anne the school was now hers, she tried her best to make her promise come true.” He smiled softly, placing a tender hand on the third desk from the front. How much time had he spent staring at her from his desk when he should have been studying? Remorse stewed within him.

Winnie continued to stare around the room, taking in every detail. “She truly is a special person,” she whispered, eyes falling slowly to Gilbert’s as a smirk crossed her face. “So Mr. Blythe,” her voice flirtatious. “Where did you sit?”

He smiled as he ruffled his curls, walking over to his old desk. “Here.” 

Winifred glided towards him. “So far back? My my, you never cease to surprise me.” She stood within inches from him, sliding her hand down his arm before pulling his arm around her waist. “I took you to be more of a front seat type of man” 

In truth, Gilbert had sat in the front row for the beginning portion of his schooling, as well as his recent years at university. But when he returned from the cross country trip with his father, he had opted to sit a few rows back. He had used the excuse that he wanted to sit with the older boys when in truth, he had quite enjoyed the view from his row. “Well, I most certainly am now.” Returning her smirk, hand still awkwardly placed on her waist. Winnie stood as if she was expecting something, a coy smile designed to tempt him. He gently leaned in, wanting to appease her and placed his lips firmly against hers.

Despite being engaged for a little over two years, they had only kissed a handful of times before. The first being at their engagement party at her mother’s insistence, and then a few stolen in private there after. While he had found himself enjoying them, something felt very odd about them. Like they weren’t kissing for love but instead out of duty. He thought Winnie probably felt the same way, because often she would pull away from him and quickly change topics or insist she needed to go freshen up. 

This kiss was no different. It was short, sweet. No passion behind it. No spark his father had told him he would feel. They pulled away from one another, stealing an awkward glance before he dropped his hand back at his side. He cleared his throat, eyes drifting towards Anne’s office. “I, uh, best go fetch her belongings.” 

“Her treasures.” Winnie corrected, smiling sadly and refusing to meet his eyes. “I’ll give you some time.” His hand gently went to caress her face, to hopefully erase the heartbroken expression from her eyes, but she turned away and made her way towards the exit before he could. 

Gilbert sighed, dread overtaking him. _ Oh Win, what have we gotten ourselves into? _He quickly pushed away the thought, forcing himself to focus on the job at hand. Making his way over to the office, he unlocked door before he gently pushed it open.

The smile returned to his lips as he looked about the familiar room, not a single object out of place. From the bookshelf holding Anne’s ever growing collection of books, to the armchair she had stolen from Gilbert’s bedroom before he left, to the different paintings she had hanging about. He made his way into the room, fingers reaching gingerly to touch the frame surrounding a painting of a sea star.

_“So, are you trying to get fired before your first day of teaching?” He joked as he began to memorize every stroke Oqwatnuk and Ka’kwet had carefully painted. It was one of Anne’s farewell gifts, along with allowing Gilbert to study under their medicine woman, before they were forced to relocate once more. _

_“Well, the council must simply deal with it.” Anne said matter of factly. “It’s horrible enough that the Globe refuses to publish my article but also that people of Avonlea continue to stand by and watch as children are being ripped from their families.” Anne’s face flushed as it often did when she was passionate about something. Her rage was beginning to boil as Gilbert made his way over to her, making sure to place his hammer out of arm's reach. _

_“Hey,” he spoke softly while putting a gentle hand on her shoulder, pulling her attention to him. “We know that Ka’kwet and her family are safe for the time being. And when they are ready to continue the fight, we will be there, right by their sides.” He smiled reassuringly. Avonlea still held a deep hatred of the Mi’kmaq but after Anne had given a passionate speech at graduation, a small group of brave individuals had discovered the errors of their ways and volunteered to help in any way possible. Gilbert included, who had been horrified to hear the details of what was happening to innocent people at the hands of their government. One night the following week, most of their classmates along with a few of the more open minded people of Avonlea met with Aluk and Oqwatnuk to stage a break in and free their daughter and as many others as they could. _

_Most of Ka’kwet’s tribe had gone into hiding after that, only allowing a few trusted people to know the location of their new home..Anne breathed deeply, calming herself before she threw herself into a fit. Gilbert was surprised how much she had matured while in Queens, not only in looks but learning to focus her temper, using it only when necessary. “You are absolutely right, Gil. Thank you.” Her eyes slid over to his hand, causing him to pull it away quickly. _

_Disappointment crossed Anne’s features as she turned back to her satchel and pulled out a rectangle package. Slowly she began unwrapping a copy of Jane Eyre, kissing it lightly before putting it away in the middle drawer of her desk. He tried to fight a chuckle but he couldn’t help it. Only Anne would kiss a book. She glared at him. “Make yourself useful and hang this up.” She carefully lifted up a mobile of seashells and colored glass. “Right in the center, I want it to catch the light.”_

_Gilbert smirked, picking up his hammer and grabbing the mobile from her. “Yes, your highness.” Anne rolled her eyes and laughed. As he began to center the hook, he saw from the corner of his eye, Anne pulled a small square book and a yellowed letter out of her bag, running her fingers gently over both of them. “Whatcha got there?” he asked curiously._

_Panicking, she threw the objects into the drawer and slammed it shut. “Nothing.”_

Gilbert reached up and touched the chandelier, causing the shells to clink together. “Oh Anne-girl, you are a special person indeed.” He stepped closer to the desk when something caught his eye. 

It was the stained letter he had seen her shove into her desk, only this time tiny specks of blood covered the envelope. He hesitantly picked it up, only to discover he recognized the handwriting on the envelope. 

“_Make haste sending that love letter Blythe.” Bash had joked with him. _

_"It’s not a love letter!” _

The letter slid from his fingers as he felt a sob rise in his throat. Swallowing it down as he reached into his back pocket to retrieve his wallet and carefully pulled out a folded piece of paper, stained and worn much like the one he had just dropped. 

_“I win...You love Anne!” _Sebastian’s voice echoed through his mind as he unfolded the piece of paper he had been carrying around for five years, fingers gently caressing the swirled letters at the top when a single tear fell onto the paper. 

_Dear Gilbert._

_———_

No words had been spoken on their journey back from the schoolhouse, Winnie’s mind appearing to be preoccupied as she looked about the woods. He had wanted to ask what was conflicting her, but he couldn’t seem to find the proper words. So, the pair walked in silence, only stealing occasional glances at one another, eyes never meeting. After the day Gilbert had, he wasn’t sure if he could handle another person being upset with him._ I will talk to her when we get back to Green Gables… _

Upon their arrival, however, Gilbert realized he wouldn’t get the opportunity to speak with his bride to be. The entire farm was in a frenzy, everyone moving quickly about. Doctor Ward was raving about the fact that he had forgotten a meeting he had that evening that he simply couldn’t be late for. Jerry was running, trying to tack Belle as quickly as I could while dodging Mrs Lynde who was carrying in baskets of laundry. Through the window, he could see Diana being scolded by Mrs Barry for some unknown reason. Winnie and Gilbert exchanged glances, the scene sending them both into a fit of giggles.

“Well,” Winnie wiped a tear from her eye. “I suppose that is my queue.”

Gilbert peered over to Winnie, expecting to see a smile on her face as well as his, but her happiness had left once again. He lifted his fingers to caress her cheek, hoping to bring her some comfort. She turned her body to face him head on, avoiding his touch and keeping her eyes low. “Are you sure you don’t need anything besides clothes?”

He shifted awkwardly, adjusting Anne’s bag of treasures on his shoulder. “Uh, no, just the clothes.” He mumbled, biting his lip. In all their time together, he was unsure Winnie had ever been this upset with him. _ Fix it, don’t let her leave angry. _Taking a deep breath, he reached down and snatched her hand before she could pull away. She shifted her gaze to his. “Thank you, Win.”

She nodded, her lips forming a tight smile. Jerry walked over to the pair. “Miss Rose, ready when you are.” Winnie nodded, turning back to face her fiancé, where she brought her lips to his cheek. 

He smiled softly as she pulled away, Jerry assisting her up into the passenger seat. Doctor Ward was adjusting himself in the back of the wagon as Gilbert made his way to him. Charles smiled when he saw his young apprentice, accepting Gilbert’s outstretched hand. 

“I’ll see you soon, sir.” Gilbert smiled, as he gave his mentor’s hand a small shake. 

Doctor Ward returned the smile sadly. “See you soon so...Gilbert.” He corrected himself, causing a pang of guilt in Gilbert's stomach. “And I am truly sorry about Anne.” 

Gilbert bit his tongue, not wanting to start another fight today, and gave a polite smile as he made his way back at the front of the wagon, he looked up to Winnie, wishing he could do anything to make her happy. “I’ll see you Monday.” He said giving her hand another squeeze before giving Jerry a small nod. 

“Walk on Belle.” Gilbert watched the group ride through the gate, closing it behind them. He waited for his fiancé to glance back, but she never did. 

Gilbert swallowed, ashamed at the relief he felt. Bash’s voice began echoing through his head once more. _ You don’t love her...what you are doing to her, it’s just wrong. _And though he wanted to hate Bash for what he said, in that moment, Gilbert knew that his brother was right. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gilbert: look down, see your foot? put it in your mouth.
> 
> find me on tumblr so we can rave together: onedayiwillflyfree
> 
> Proofreading gems: Lil_Redhead (royalcordelia tumblr) and bruadarxch (rootedbutfl0wing). Check both of these talented ladies out!


	7. Apple Loaf

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello friends, so the news monday really threw me for a loop. This chapter was totally written in three days (as opposed to my normal week) so I apologize if it isnt perfect! Enjoy this slightly funny, mostly feels filled chapter :)

Chapter Seven: Apple Loaf

“I would be careful going in there, the Barry women are at each other's throats again,” Mrs Lynde had warned when she saw Gilbert walking up to the house. He had almost been tempted to remain outside for a little while longer but he knew that he couldn't. Anne needed him.

And what Gilbert did _ not _ need was to not be pulled into another argument today. But as he stepped through the kitchen door of Green Gables, he felt it was almost inevitable when he heard an enraged voice scream from the parlor. “Mother, I am a woman now! You _ cannot _continue to treat me like a child!” 

“Since you are behaving like a child, I will treat you accordingly!” Gilbert closed the door quietly behind him, hoping to sneak past without poking the bear even further. _ Alright, take off your coat, grab your plate, go to Anne. _He stealthily made his way towards the table as the screaming raged on. Upon his arrival at the table, he was soon reminded that he had forgotten to eat today...again. The enticing aroma of cooked potatoes, carrots, and beef caused his stomach to growl. Before he could stop himself, he reached forward and plucked a carrot and popped it in his mouth, savouring each bite.

He was about to reach for another when he was quickly reminded he was supposed to be rushing as a deafening voice wailed from the parlor. “_ Diana, get back here.” _

“Mother, I am staying and that is final!” Footsteps marched quickly down the hallway, his position about to be compromised. _ No no no... _He frantically tried pulling his coat off as the footsteps inched closer. It was more difficult than he thought, one of his arms grasping tightly to Anne’s treasure bag. 

“Diana, honestly, it’s bad enough we missed tea with your father, but now you’re being ridiculous,” Mrs Barry scolded as she and Diana entered the kitchen. He didn’t appear to be noticed, Diana’s attention solely on the door that she was going to force her mother through. Gilbert continued fussing with his coat, still holding onto a slight amount of hope that he wouldn’t be noticed when the bag slipped from his grip and went crashing to the floor. When their eyes shot to him, he silently scolded himself for not being able to control his hunger. They stared at him bewildered as he stood there with his coat half way off his body and a bag of various objects strewn about the floor. 

With a hesitant laugh, he shrugged his coat off the rest of the way. “Evening, I was just, uh..” he mumbled as he threw it over a chair.

“Oh Gilbert, thank goodness you’re here!” Mrs Barry said exasperated, dragging Diana over to him. “_ Please _ explain to Diana that she simply cannot stay!” 

Diana yanked her arm away. “Don’t ask him, he thinks he is the only one capable of caring for Anne.” Resentment dripped from every word she spoke, almost as if the words tasted bitter on her tongue. Gilbert sincerely needed to figure out what he had done to make Diana so angry with him. He opened his mouth to add in his opinion on the matter when he was interrupted.

“Heavens above Diana, he is studying medicine!” Mrs Barry cried, looking as if she was ready to rip her hair out. “He _ is _ capable to care for Anne!” Gilbert opened his mouth once more, hoping to finally get a word in edgewise.

“I won’t leave her!” Diana cried as her eyes began to moisten as her frustrations were becoming increasingly apparent. “And neither you nor _ him... _” She shot him a look that held so much fury, he was sure it would kill him if possible. “...can tell me otherwise!”

“Di...” Gilbert spoke softly, hoping it would calm her.

“I never should have allowed you to drop out of finishing school to go to college.” Mrs. Barry’s eyes filled with tears along with her daughters. “I thought if you had some freedom to follow your dreams that you would learn to behave properly but it’s clear to me now that it was a mistake. You will never find a husband now and will become a spinster....”

“Maybe I don’t want to marry, Mother!” 

“Oh, you will marry Diana, whether you like it or not!”

“That is enough!” Gilbert yelled as he brought his fists down hard against the table. Both women silenced, eyes both swimming with tears and now, horror. He cleared his throat and brought his fingers up to his curls. “Sorry,” he whispered, sucking in a deep breath as he turned his attention to his childhood friend. “Now, Diana, your mother is right..”

She scoffed, crossing her arms like an upset child. “Oh, of course you would agree...”

“Damn it Diana, would you let me finish!” His words were harsh but he was done being interrupted. He was hungry, tired, and a sharp pain was beginning to form in his head. Diana’s mouth stood agape, shocked that Gilbert would speak such crude language to her. Mrs. Barry looked like she was on the verge of fainting as her face paled. He rubbed his brow, taking another deep breath in an attempt to prevent another outburst. “Your mother is right that you need to go home.” Diana tried to protest only this time it was his turn to shoot daggers at her. She closed her mouth, lips forming a tight line, allowing him to continue. “You have been traveling for weeks Diana. You have to be exhausted and you’re a mess.” He gingerly stepped towards her. 

She uncrossed her arms and for the first time since her arrival, she took a good look at herself. Her face bore surprise, as if she realized just how dishevelled she had become on her run through the woods. Gilbert put a hand on his friend's shoulder. No matter how angry she was with him at the moment, she was still one of his oldest friends and he cared for her well being almost as much as Anne’s. “I’m not saying that you need to leave because I don’t want you here. I am saying you need to get yourself cleaned up and a good night's rest in your own bed. You need to take care of yourself before you can take care of Anne.” 

Diana’s eyes found his, all traces of anger dissipated, leaving behind only sorrow. “I...I don’t want to leave her...”

He smiled softly, understanding every emotion she was feeling. “Di, the best thing you can do right now is take care of yourself.”

“I...I..” Tears were pouring as she collapsed into Gilbert, her anger towards him now a thing of the past. 

“I know,” he whispered, rubbing her back gently. She sobbed into his shirt, allowing herself to be vulnerable. “There’s nothing you can do tonight, she is just going to rest this evening. However, in the morning...” His eyes met with Mrs Barry, warning her to not say a word to only notice wet stains upon her cheeks as well. She nodded, her lip quivering while she fought back her own sobs. Gilbert tilted his head in return before he turned his attention back to his friend. “In the morning, you can come over and make Anne and Marilla some breakfast, that would be helpful for both of them.” 

She let out a final sob before she pulled away and looked up at him, her eyes so swollen he was unsure how much she could actually see. “First thing?” she asked hopefully. 

“First thing,” he confirmed with a smile. 

Diana grinned for a moment, the answer satisfying her, before she turned serious. “And if anything happens this evening, you’ll fetch me?” He nodded and she beamed once more. “Good. Then I will see you first thing in the morning.”

“Diana...darling...” Mrs. Barry interverned nervously. Diana’s anger began to return as she remembered her mother was still standing in the kitchen with her. She readied herself for another screaming match when her mother sniffed softly, speaking slowly to not raise emotions. “I’m fine with you coming, however...” She sniffed once again as a stray tear descended down her cheeld. “Your friends...they are due tomorrow morning.”

Diana’s face dropped as her mind processed what her mother had just reminded her. “Cole..._ Cole!” _ She yelled, grabbing tightly to Gilbert’s arm. “Has anyone told him?” 

Gilbert shrugged, he was still confused about how Mrs. Barry had been informed seeing as Marilla hadn’t left Anne’s side all night. “I’m not sure how he could know, not unless someone had sent a telegram.” He scolded himself, he should have told Winifred to bring the news to Josephine Barry and her young ward. They would be just as worried about Anne as all of them.

“If Cole doesn’t know...” She bit her lip when her eyes became the size of saucers. “Then that means Roy doesn’t know. Oh no no no.” 

A perfect mixture of anger and envy began consuming his heart, as they so often did whenever Royal Gardner was mentioned. He knew that the man had every right to know, he was her fiancé after all, but selfishly, Gilbert had hoped that he wouldn’t have to face the man who captured Anne’s heart. 

“Oh no,” Mrs Barry whispered. “We must inform him immediately. He would want to be here, he _ needs _ to be here.” 

Gilbert clenched his hands, digging his fingernails deep into his palms. “The telegraph office will be closed by now.” 

Diana, oblivious of his frustration, shook her head. “It doesn’t matter, they will be arriving tomorrow morning with Aunt Josephine anyway. Father and I will fetch them before coming here. They must see her.” Gilbert hesitated, causing Diana to focus on him. “Gilbert, they_ have _ to see her. Roy is her fiancé _ ” _

He wanted to say no, that they couldn’t risk it that she was too sick and couldn’t be exposed to people. But he knew how selfish and wrong that was. He couldn’t keep Cole away from her as much as he could Diana, let alone her fiancé who was sure to be sick with grief. She wasn't Gilbert’s alone, she never had been. So, with that thought running through his mind, he swallowed his pride and forced his anger away and whispered, “Of course.” More confidently he added. “They can’t touch her though.” Diana cocked an eyebrow, questioning him silently. He ruffled his curls nervously. “Disease is more likely to spread through contact. It was bad enough I let you touch her.”

Diana, still not fully convinced that was the sole reason, opened her mouth to question him when a voice boomed from up the stairs.

“Honestly, Anne Shirley-Cuthbert! Of all the times you chose to be stubborn, why is this one of them?!” A door slammed only to be followed by heavy footfalls making their way down the hall to the stairs. Gilbert couldn’t help but smirk and cast a glance towards Diana, who was rolling her eyes and smiling. How many times had they heard Marilla yell the same thing? 

Marilla raced down the steps, grumbling quietly as she carried a tray of tea and a plate identical to the one that was left for him on the table. “This child is going to put me into an early grave, heavens above.” She nearly jumped from the platform before she slammed the tray on the table, unloading the contents in frustration and oblivious that she wasn’t alone. “Rachel. Rachel! Lordy, where is that woman when I need her.” Gilbert and Diana exchanged glances and both let out small chuckles, causing Marilla to jump. Her eyes found Gilbert’s and she sighed in relief. “Oh thank heavens you’re back! Mayhaps she will listen to you!”

“Doubtful,” he mumbled, knowing just how stubborn Anne could be when she puts her mind to it. “What’s happening?” Gilbert asked, still bemused by Marilla’s frustration.

She however, didn’t find any humor in the situation. “She’s not eating. She hasn’t since yesterday morning.” 

———

“Thank you for the platter, Marilla, I am simply starved!” Gilbert yelled from just outside of Anne’s closed door. He took a deep breath, balancing the tray and her treasures in one hand as he turned the knob to enter Anne’s bedroom. 

Upon his entrance, he was met by a series of moist coughs. Anne’s cheeks were scarlett, her hair sticking to her forehead from sweat. “I told Marilla...” She coughed, this time holding a handkerchief up to her mouth to catch mucus as it flew from her throat. “I told her I’m not hungry.” She replied, her breathing heavy and her eyes tired. 

Gilbert smirked as he made his way over to her, resting the tray on her nightstand before resting the bag on the floor. Anne eyed it anxiously, aware of what was in the bag. “Marilla said you haven’t eaten since yesterday.” He said, sliding the bag away with his foot, causing her to frown deeply. Gilbert moved his head to force Anne to look at him, their faces only inches apart. When she finally did meet his eyes, he realized how tired they were. Her cheekbones, which were always prominent, were sticking out more so than they normally did. “Anne, you need to eat.”

“I know,” She replied sadly, pulling her face away from his, her cheeks turning the faintest shade of pink. Her voice was raspy, he could only imagine how sore her throat had become over the last twenty four hours. “But as I said, I am not hungry. And I would greatly appreciate it if you wouldn’t try to force food upon me either, Gil.” Gilbert swallowed as she scored lower into the bed. She looked exhausted, even more so than she had a few hours prior. He hated to ask this of her, but he knew that she needed to eat to keep her strength. 

His own stomach growled, giving him an idea. Tussling his hair, he let out an over exaggerated sigh. “I won’t force you Anne.” It took a lot to surprise Anne Shirley-Cuthbert, and her doctor,_ her friend _ not trying to convince her to eat? That surprised her indeed. 

“You won't?” 

Shaking his head, a boyish grin popped onto his face. “No, I can’t force you to do something you have no interest in doing. I have learned that much over the years.” She rolled her eyes lazily as he wiped away the grin, feigning upset. “It is a shame though, Hazel’s apple loaf looks marvelous…” On cue, his stomach growled, this time loud enough that it caught Anne’s ear. He licked his lips as he stared longingly at the sweet bread sitting next to them. “I know I have sorely missed it, _ almost _ as much as your pie. But I suppose I will have to wait a bit longer.” He sighed and reached into his bag for his anatomy book, pulling it onto his lap and flipping to a random page.

Anne cocked a weary eyebrow, watching intently as he pretended to read. “Gil?”

“Hmm?” he hummed, flipping to the next page and skimmed through a paragraph on diseases of the kidneys.

“Are you not going to eat?” she questioned curiously.

Gilbert flipped the page nonchalantly. “Uh nope, not hungry, Carrots.” 

She stared at him. “Gil...please eat.” The words came out in a scratchy plead. Gilbert fought of a smirk. _ You never change. _

“You know Anne,” he closed his book with a sharp _ snap _ before resting it on his lap. “When my father was sick, I ate alone almost everyday for months. You see, the scent of food made his stomach upset, so I had to eat at the kitchen table.” Grief began creeping in as memories flooded his mind. He remembered all the times had he would force his father to eat or drink just so he could cling to life for one additional day. Anne’s gaze never shifted, hanging on Gilbert’s every word as he continued. “I grew to dread supper time, knowing it would be filled with silence. And when he died...the silence began to affect me in ways I never expected.” He bit his lip and ran a tender hand through his curls when his eyes connected with Anne’s, hers filling with tears. _ Back on topic Gilbert, supposed to be getting her to eat. Not bare your soul. _ He forced out a chuckle, trying to reassure her that he was alright. “But then, while on the freighter, I met Bash and he would sit with me at every meal. Laugh with me, _ laughed at me _ on most occasions.” This brought a smile to her face. She knew better than most that Bash’s favorite past time was giving his brother grief and making him the butt of most of his jokes. “He made meals fun again...and after that, I decided that I never wanted to eat without company again.”

Anne bit her lip, as if she was considering his words. “Well,” she started before she brought her handkerchief to her lips and let out a short cough. “I am still in the room with you.” 

Gilbert rolled his eyes. “True but it is rude for me to eat in front of you, isn’t it?” His stomach started growling, this time so ferociously it was beginning to hurt. He placed a gentle hand on his abdomen, hoping it would calm down if he rubbed it. “But if you choose not to eat, Anne-girl, then I won’t eat either. Because like I said, I hate eating alone.”

Anne wiped her nose and pursed her lips together, her mind going through her options. “You said it was Hazel’s apple loaf?” she asked gently. 

“_ And _ Delphine’s,” He smiled proudly, as he normally did when his niece was brought into conversation. “Bash…” he paused for a second, remembering his brothers rage with him just hours earlier. Anne looked concerned at his hesitation. Gilbert plastered on the biggest smile he could muster. “Bash said that she wanted her Auntie Anne to have something sweet because...” 

“Because I make her something sweet whenever she doesn’t feel well.” Anne finished. Gilbert nodded as she scratched her head. “Well...if Dellie made it...” 

Gilbert grinned triumphantly as he took the biggest slice from the tray. “Honey, jam?”

“Just the bread please...” Anne mumbled as she struggled to push herself upright. Gilbert leaned forward to provide assistance but she shook him off. “I can do it, thank you.” After a moment, she adjusted herself to a sitting position, holding her hand out for the bread. He obliged, handing it to her.

A smirk crawled on his lips as she tore off a small piece and put it in her mouth, chewing it slowly before forcing down her throat. Through the pain, the corners of her mouth lifted slightly when suddenly, his stomach screamed, begging to be filled. Anne peered sideways as she pinched off another bite. “I thought you were going to eat with me.” 

“Just wanted to make sure you kept up your end of the bargain.” Anne looked mortified as Gilbert pulled his plate onto his lap and shovelling a large potato into his mouth, resisting the urge to let out a cry of joy. 

“Did you trick me, Gil?” He stifled a laugh while he chewed, having no desire to choke. 

“No,” he mumbled, swallowing the bite. Anne glared at him. “Well maybe a little. In my defense though, you’re the one that is usually harping on me to eat, I figured I would simply return the favor.” Anne couldn’t argue with him, knowing he was right, so instead she timidly tore another piece off and shoved in her mouth. 

The pair are the rest of their meals in silence, only being interrupted by Anne’s occasional coughs as she struggled to get food down. Gilbert, however, had no issues eating the entirety of his plate in only a few bites, and almost found himself going downstairs to ask Marilla for seconds. Deciding against it, he decided to move onto desert when he noticed Anne still staring at him, her half eaten loaf resting in her lap. 

“What do you need? Are you thirsty?” he asked, pulling his hand away from the tray. Anne smiled softly. 

“No thank you. It’s just…” She cleared her throat as if to ward off another fit. “It’s just nice to eat with you again.” He returned her smile, thinking of all the meals they shared over open text books the night before big exams and the holidays their families had shared over the last five years. 

“Yeah. It’s been a long time.” Gilbert replied reminiscently as he reached for his desert. He was unsure of how Hazel had always managed to capture the perfect combination of sweet and tart, a flavor that not even french patisseries could master. Much like Marillas stew, it brought the taste of home when he took a piece on his tongue. He was beginning to realize he longed for home more than he thought. The food, the smells, the expansive land, the people, that is what made Avonlea home. His family home was here, his family was here… Anne was here.

Their eyes connected as she began sinking further into her pillows, exhaustion beginning to win over and her dinner long since forgotten. Her breathing was heavy, as each inhale hurt worse than the last. Suddenly, the bread didn’t taste so sweet. Quickly, he began cleaning up, ready to leave Anne to her slumber. He reached forward to grab the bread from her lap when her hand grabbed hold of his arm, grasping it tightly as tears streamed from the corners of her eyes. “Stay,” she whispered. 

His voice caught, as it had so many times in the last twenty four hours, only this time he was unsure if it was from her declaration, the shock he felt when she grabbed ahold of him, or the heat that was radiating off of her. Anne’s hand felt like his own personal oven, her fever creeping higher with each passing moment. “Anne...” he knew he should pull away, the butterflies in his stomach growing every second she held to him. But when he tried to pull away, she held tighter. 

“I didn’t ask you to stay before,” she whispered, her voice cracking. “I have regretted it every day since.” Gilbert’s heart hurt as it pounded hard against his chest. So hard he was sure it would break through his rib cage. “Please stay.” Before he could respond, question what she was saying, her hacking began and this time it seemed there would be no end, each one shaking their hands and sent her body flailing. He slowly sat down as his knees began wobbling with every wheeze. 

Why couldn’t he think of what to do? Why couldn’t he stop the pain she was feeling? All his years of schooling and experience in his apprenticeship, he should know what to do. Medicine was always advancing, growing and learning. And yet, staring at Anne, his Anne, in so much agony and so afraid, he couldn’t think of any medicine that could help her. There has to be something. Why couldn’t he just think of it?

Still, no matter how hard he willed it, nothing came to him as her coughs began to subside and she rolled over on her side to face him. Their hands remained locked, his thoughts of leaving instantly disappearing.

Her hair fell in front of her face, sticking to her moist cheeks.“Do you want tea?” he whispered gently as he moved her hair away from her eyes, holding it a second longer than necessary.

“Sleep...” was the only response he received as Anne slipped off into a deep slumber. 

He wasn’t sure how long he stared at her for. Seconds, minutes perhaps? Anytime he even considered taking his eyes off of her, his mind would wander to her words that he finally began to process...

_ “I didn’t ask you to stay before… I have regretted it every day since.” _

Gilbert was unsure if the words were her own or the fever talking. Had Anne just admitted to feelings he had long given up hope were there? No, she couldn’t be. She was engaged. 

But then again...so was he. And even though it was wicked of him, he knew the feelings for Anne had never diminished...he had simply tucked them away, knowing his love would always be unrequited. _ But what if _... he pushed the thoughts away. Even if there was ever a chance for the pair to become a “them,” it had long since passed. Gilbert, although unsure if what he felt for Winifred was love, was a man of honor. And he would remain true to his word. 

It pained him to slide his hand from Anne’s grasp, but he did just so. Instantly he missed having her fingers enlaced with his, fitting perfectly as if her hands were molding exclusively for him. Even though he had pulled away, he couldn’t find any desire to leave, her desperate plea for him to stay ringing in his head.

_ It’s just one night. I’m a doctor whose looking after a scared patient. A friend taking care of a friend. _

He told himself that lie continuously as he walked down the hall to the linen closet and pulled out a spare blanket. It repeated in his head as he knocked on Jerry’s bedroom door and asked to borrow a shirt since he would be staying for the evening. He repeated it to himself as he bid Marilla good night and told her that he would watch over Anne this evening so she could rest. He repeated it as he sat down next to Anne’s bedside, blanket wrapped around his shoulders and he reached for his anatomy, this time absorbing his study material. He repeated it again as the sun kissed the horizon a fond good night and he lit the lamp beside her bed. It repeated over and over again, hoping that it would finally stick at some point.

After hours of repeating the mantra, when the stars were lighting the night sky and he wanted nothing more to rest his weary head, his eyes once again drifted to the ethereal being before him and knew the lie would never stick. 

Because he knew, no matter how hard he tried to tuck away his feelings, Anne would never be just a patient. Just a friend. Anne Shirley Cuthbert would always be his first love, and what he was slowly realizing, his only. 

A curl fell over her eyes again as she coughed. He brushed it back once more, only this time bringing his fingers to gently caress her cheek. Even though it felt like warm embers, he felt the spark he so desired to feel with his promised. The spark his father told him he would feel with the right person. 

_ “Marry for love, nothing else.” _

He swallowed, Mary’s words echoing, as if she had predicted years ago that he would put himself into quite the pickle.

“_ You don’t love her!” Bash yelled. _

Tears rolled down his cheek, remembering earlier that he realized he wasn’t in love with his bride to be. He never had been and never would be. And with that realization, his made the choice that he should have made two years ago. He wouldn’t marry Winifred.

——-

When the rooster crowed the following morning, Gilbert found himself surprised. He had half expected to be awoken many times during the night by one of Anne’s many coughing bouts but found himself relieved that she had hopefully slept well. 

Trying to right himself, he found it difficult, his neck and back were stiff and cracking in various places. _ You’re only twenty and you’re already have the body of a sixty year old man. _ With one final crack of his neck, he felt almost normal but he would have to work at the knot on his upper shoulder before he would be able to function fully. He stood and stretched, hopefully to relieve tension on the muscle. 

Smells of bacon and toast wafted from down below causing Gilbert’s stomach to let out a bellowing growl. In Paris, he would have to force himself to eat. He had been back in Avonlea for less than two days and somehow, food just sounded delightful again. It was almost as if magic surrounded his island, constantly providing him with reasons for him to return. 

His eyes wandered to the being sleeping before him and he paused his stretching. He should probably wake her, she needed to eat this morning. “Anne?” he asked, reaching down gently to tap her shoulder. When she didn’t stir, he cocked an eyebrow. “Hey, Anne-girl.” He shook her shoulder, this time her eyes fluttering for a moment before shutting. Gilbert bit his lip, he truly didn’t want to wake her but he also knew that if she didn’t eat when he did, then she was most likely not going to eat at all. 

“I’ll be back in a minute, Carrots.” He leaned forward, his lips almost touching her forehead when he stopped himself. Even though he had made the decision to call off his engagement, he was still currently promised to Winnie. And even then, she was still in love with another man, which was something he was going to have to deal with.

With a large sigh, he exited the room, casting one final glance over as he slowly shut the door behind him. “Gilbert?” Diana’s soft voice rang through the hallway. He spun around to see Diana, carrying a plate with a fried egg and thick cut of toast. 

“Oh, uh...” He tried to tame his curls and tuck in the front of his shirt that must have come out while he slept. “Morning Diana. I, uh, thought you had to pick up…”

A lanky young man with strawberry blonde hair climbed the last step, careful not to spill a cup of juice he was holding. “Diana, you forgot the…” His eyes locked with Gilberts and a massive grin formed on his lips. “Gilbert, it is so nice to see you!”

“Morning Cole,” he said with a smile as Cole shoved the cup into Diana’s hand. Gilbert extended his arm, ready for his old friend to shake it when he was wrapped up in a tight hug. He looked back at Diana, who just shrugged her shoulders. Gilbert returned the hug, relieved that at least a few people were excited to have him home. “It’s nice to see you too.”

Cole pulled away, his gaze drifting to Anne’s door. “How is she? Diana said she isn’t eating?” 

Gilbert swallowed, “I managed to get her to eat a little last night but not enough to aide her recovery. The eggs will be good.” He pointed to the plate Diana was holding. Cole nodded while biting his lip.

“Can we see her?” He asked innocently, his voice sounding like that of a small child rather than a six foot man.

Gilbert hesitated. “Well, she is still resting now, so I don’t think that would be best…”

“Don’t worry Gil,” a sultry voice spoke from just behind Diana. Gilbert’s blood began to boil. This stranger was using his nickname, Anne’s nickname, and he had not even uttered an introduction. The man stepped forward, squaring his chest to the young doctor. His chestnut eyes pierced through Gilbert’s moss ones. “We won’t wake her.”

Cole looked anxiously between the pair and Diana, begging her for some assistance. “Um, Gilbert, this is…” Diana began.

“Oh Diana, allow me the pleasure of introducing myself to my fiancée’s dearest friend.” Diana shut her mouth and Gilbert could swear he saw the slightest smirk form on her lips. The man held out his hand to Gilbert expectantly. “Nice to finally meet you, Gil. I’m Roy, Royal Gardner.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gilbert can't win yall.
> 
> Follow me on tumblr: onedayiwillflyfree
> 
> Proofreaders: Lil_Redhead (royalcordelia) and bruadarxch (rootedbutfl0wing) check them out!


	8. Royal Gardner

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...hey guys, hows it going? So, sorry for the lack of update last week but I have a genuinely awesome excuse! This chapter; this beautiful, intense, crazy chapter is well over 11,000 words. So much happens within those 11000 words, that I have decided to split it into two parts. I will be uploading half today, and then half in Monday morning! Thank you for your patience lovelies, and you might wanna grab some popcorn;)

Chapter 8: Royal Gardner

“I can’t believe you still have this!” Cole exclaimed as he held up a sketch that he had penned years ago. Gilbert smiled smally to himself, he had always loved the portrait of Anne. Her long fire braids gently over her shoulders and not a freckle was out of place. He had even managed to capture the sparkle in her eyes that always accompanied her smile. If he had that much talent as a teenager, it was no wonder his sculptures and paintings were taking the world by storm.

“Of course I kept it,” Anne smiled weakly. Despite Roy's promise not to wake her, the moment she heard her friends step through the threshold of her room, her eyes shot open and her spirits lifted immediately. “You made me look beautiful when I was so homely.” _ Liar _Gilbert thought. Anne had never looked homely a day in her life, not even now when she had been so terribly ill and hadn’t bathed in days. Diana held another forkful of eggs to Anne’s lips, who grimaced and pushed it away. She looked up pleadingly to Gilbert. “No more please.” 

Diana looked to Gilbert for approval. He gave a curt nod as he stepped forward to retrieve the plate when Roy stepped in front of him. 

“Allow me, Di,” he said as he grabbed the plate. Gilbert had known this man for all of five minutes but whenever he heard the sound of Roy’s accented voice, he instantly felt nauseous. And what was his problem with nicknames? 

“Thank you Roy, that’s very kind of you.” Diana’s voice was sweet, genuinely thankful. This too infuriated Gilbert, because ever since her arrival, Diana had spoken to him with such malice despite everything he had been doing for Anne. Roy walked over to Anne’s armoire and placed the plate upon it, shooting him a wink only he could see. Gilbert clenched his jaw, grinding the back of his teeth together to fight off a scowl.

Cole cocked his head to the side, still entranced with his old sketch, before he pushed it away from him as if the sight of it disgusted him. “Yeah...that’s not going to do.” He reached into his bag, producing a sketchbook covered with black dust. It wasn’t until he pulled out his drawing utensil that Gilbert realized it must be charcoal. “Anne, can you sit up a tad more for me?”

Her eyes rolled to the side, peering at him through half closed lids. “Really?” 

Cole nodded, flipping to a bare page. “Yes! The muses are speaking to me and they're telling me I need to update this sketch. Diana, help her please.”Anne groaned as Diana giggled and pulled her friend forward, arranging a bundle of pillows behind her so she could sit up without much effort. “Perfect! Royal, can you open the curtain just a smidge more? There is a shadow.”

As Roy slid the curtain open, Anne covered her face. “Honestly Cole, I look…” she coughed, causing hair to fly into her eyes. “I look positively frightful.”

Gilbert wanted to step forward, brush her hair from her eyes and tell her that it was impossible for her to look anything other than stunning. That she was sunshine personified. He almost took a step, not caring any longer who would hear. But Roy was quicker crossing the room, sitting down at the end of her bed and brushed a curl of fire behind her ear. Anne’s eyes rose to his, appearing shocked by his touch.

“My dearest, you and I both know you’re lovelier than autumn leaves, than the first blooms of spring, and the freshly fallen snow.” His hand gingerly lingered on his fiancée’s cheek, which were slowly shifting from a pale peonie to a deep scarlet. Anne’s eyes shot to Gilbert, who refused to meet her gaze for fear his heart would shatter. He still felt the burn from her gaze when he cleared his throat to remind the couple of the no touching rule.

Roy pulled his hand away slowly, eyes not leaving Anne. “Sorry, can’t help myself sometimes. My bride is just simply irresistible,” Roy glanced over his shoulder with a smirk. “Wouldn’t you agree, Gil?” Diana’s mouth sat agape as she looked in between the two men as Anne bit her lip, gaze not leaving Gilbert. Cole, who had become completely focused on his sketch, seemed oblivious to the tensions that were slowly building.

Gilbert smiled tightly, a piece of his scabbed cheek resting between his molars. Roy licked his lips, holding Gilbert’s glare for a moment when he let out a soft chuckle as he rose from the bed. “With your own bride to be, of course.” He took confident strides towards the aspiring doctor in the corner. “From what I’ve been informed, she is rival to that love goddess... what was her name again, dear?”

Anne looked down at her hands, her embarrassment becoming more and more apparent. “Aphrodite.”

Roy snapped his fingers as he closed the space between them further. “That’s it. Aphrodite. Tell me Gil,” He stood mere inches from Gilbert and smirked once more. “Is she truly rival to Aphrodite?” 

Gilbert peered over Roy’s shoulder, eyes scanning for Anne. Her own eyes were still glued to her intertwined hands, out of embarrassment or exhaustion he didn’t know. He swallowed and spoke slowly. “Winnie is...”

Cole stopped scratching the charcoal against the page. “Anne, you can lay back now, but still try to keep your face towards me.” Anne looked relieved as she slid down deeper into her pillows, looking as if she could drift off at any moment.

Gilbert decided that she wasn’t paying the men any mind, he turned his attention back to Roy, who was grinning smugly. “Winnie is rather lovely.”

As the words left his mouth, he turned his gaze to Anne, curious to see if she was going to react at all. To see she was feeling any of the same jealousy he felt when Roy had taken her face in his hands. Despite her eyes fluttering shut, she still found his eyes and he could see it. The storm that was so often paired with her anger was brewing within her.

Their stares were broken when Roy shifted just enough to block them from seeing one another, an aura of protectiveness radiating off of him as he balled his fists. Gilbert wanted to chuckle, was Roy actually jealous? Was he trying to start a fight with _ him _? Roy had a good few inches on him, sure, but from what Gilbert could tell, that was about all he had going for him. His hands looked soft, like a man who was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. He was lanky, well kept, and in all honesty, appeared to be far too posh to have ever actually punched someone before. Gilbert’s anger was making its return, something that was becoming more and more frequent over the last few days.

“Roy!” Diana broke the silence. Roy glanced over his shoulder as Diana pressed her hand against Anne’s forehead. “Could you bring me that pitcher? I imagine Anne would like to wash her face, it has been a few days..”

Roy swiped a finger across his lip and clapped Gilbert’s shoulder with a smile. “Well, cannot wait to meet that girl of yours!” With that, he turned and reached for the water pitcher and basin resting on top of Anne’s armoire. He picked up the pitcher, looking into it sadly. “Looks like we need some more. I’ll...”

“I’ll get it.” Gilbert stepped forward, ripping the jug from Roy before exiting from the room. He needed to get out of the room, he didn’t want to lose his temper. Not in front of Anne, especially with her feeling so sick. Once he crossed the threshold, he heard a loud smack followed by an annoyed grunt.

“What was that for Diana?” he heard Cole ask cluelessly. Gilbert rolled his eyes and took a deep breath before making his way down the hall. 

His mind wandered to what had just happened a few moments prior. Was Roy truly trying to pick a fight? What was that guy's problem with him?And why did he feel the need to protect Anne against Gilbert of all people? Gilbert hadn’t done anything to him, he had only just met him less than an hour ago. And as far as he knew, he had never done anything to hurt Anne, not intentionally anyway. If anything, Gilbert should hate him, for Roy held the one thing he had always desired. _ No, no, Gilbert, that is on you. You gave up that fight. _He gave up the right to Anne’s affection the moment he slid a ring onto Winifred’s finger.

“Just be happy for them,” he whispered to himself as he descended down the stairs. 

In the kitchen, he spotted Mrs Lynde sitting by the fire, still continuing on the same lavender scarf she was working on yesterday morning. He was unsure why she was still working on it, the scarf was surely longer than his entire body at this point, but he had no intention of asking her why she wasn’t stopping. Especially not after he saw Marilla on her knees with a bucket of water and a scrub brush, cleaning every inch she could reach and grumbling with each stroke. 

“What’s happening? They aren’t bothering her too much are they? No, that’s silly, they’re her friends. Does she need more food? Drink? Tea. I should make tea.” She threw the brush into the bucket as she stood, droplets landing on Rachel and her masterpiece. 

“Heavens sake, Marilla!” Rachel scolded, wiping the moisture from her face. Marilla ignored her, grabbing the kettle to fill from the spout and let out a small sob. Rachel sighed, looking sadly at her friend as she threw her masterpiece into her yarn bag and swiftly made her way to her friend and rested a gentle hand upon Marilla's shoulder. “Marilla, you need to rest. I’ll make the tea.” Marilla opened her mouth to argue but was waved off as Rachel filled the kettle and placed it on the stove. “She is with her friends, they will fetch you if need be. Besides, Gilbert is up there. And we all know how that boy is when Anne is involved.”

He shifted awkwardly on the final step, it was strange to hear someone talk about him as if he wasn’t present. It also caused him to realize his presence could raise tensions and cause unneeded worry. He eyed the back door. _ Perhaps I can sneak out without alerting either of them, get water from the outside spicket. Yeah, that could work... _

“Hey Doc! What’s taking you so long?” Roy shouted from the top of the steps, compromising his location. Both women spun, Marilla’s face falling. 

“What’s wrong? Does she need me?” Marilla sputtered out, looking seconds away from bolting up the stairs. 

Gilbert shook his head frantically. “No, no she’s...”

“No need to worry Miss Cuthbert.” Roy bounced down the steps. Gilbert resisted the urge to scowl as Roy bumped his shoulder hard when he joined him on the platform.“Anne just wanted to wash up a bit is all, so Gil here was coming to fill up the pitcher for her. Weren’t you, Gil?”

_ Call me Gil one more time… _ Gilbert smiled tightly, fighting every urge within him to not push Roy off the steps.

Marilla locked eyes with Gilbert. “So, she is alright?” 

“Yes,” Roy and Gilbert responded in unison before they each shot a disgusted glare towards the other. 

Roy cleared his throat, snatching the pitcher from Gilbert’s grasp and drifted towards the older women. _ What is with this prick? _“When I left them to come see what the hold up was on the water,” Another glare over his shoulder. “The three of them were laughing over something Diana had said. I assure you Miss Cuthbert, Anne is well.” Roy gave a reassuring smile. 

Marilla nodded, finding some comfort in the young man's words. Her eyes drifted to Roy’s hands. “Give that to me, I’ll fill it for you so you can be on your way.” 

“Thank you Miss Cuthbert, you’re too kind.” The pitcher exchanged hands, Marilla stepping to the sink to fill it. Gilbert was surprised at how genuine the man’s voice was and that he had managed to calm Marilla so quickly. Roy flashed another bright smile as the pitcher made his way back to him. “Thank you.” Marilla gave a curt nod before he continued. “Also, I would like to apologize for our intrusion, I know Anne needs her rest.”

She smiled softly. “Think nothing of it Roy. Anne needs her rest, yes, but knowing her, she also needs you all here. We all know if she were alone with only me for company, she would be incredibly bored.” Marilla chuckled before glancing over to Gilbert. “It is so wonderful to hear these halls filled with laughter once more.” Gilbert smiled, fond memories flashing through his mind.

Roy looked between the pair. “Well, when Anne is feeling better, I would love to hear some of those stories. And later on, it will be wonderful to be apart of _ new _memories.” He said the words in response to Marilla but his focus had fallen on Gilbert, their eyes locking and anger brewing.

Marilla smiled nervously, as if she could sense the rising tensions. “Yes. Of course.” 

The kettle whistled from the stove and Rachel clapped her hands together. “Finally!” She went grabbed the kettle, oblivious to all the going ons in the room as she poured the water into a teapot. Roy and Gilbert continued their stares, tensions building higher and higher with each passing moment. “Boys, would you like some tea?”

“No thank you, Mrs Lynde,” Roy said smoothly, not breaking his gaze. “Gil and I should be getting back up to _ my _girl anyway.” Marilla continued looking between the pair as Gilbert balled his hands.

“Come along, Marilla,” Mrs Lynde said, corralling her friend from the room. “We have many things to catch up on.” Marilla opened her mouth to speak but Rachel continued on, giddy to share the latest gossip. “You will not believe what I heard about the eldest Andrews girl! She’s trying to buy a farm up in Nova Scotia!” And with that, Roy and Gilbert were left alone, one smirking while the other was holding his fists so tightly that crescent cuts were beginning to form from his fingernails. 

Seconds had ticked by when Roy cracked a smirk. “You alright, Gil?” 

“I’m fine.” Gilbert mumbled. Roy’s lips dropped into a frown as he rested the pitcher on the table, stepping towards the platform. 

“It’s alright Gil, you can tell me. We’re friends aren’t we?” Roy clapped his hands against Gilbert’s shoulders. “Tell me what’s wrong.”

Gilbert yanked his shoulders away, for fear if lingered a moment longer he would lose control. “Don’t touch me...” 

Roy held his hands up defensively, chuckling. “Woah Doc. What’s the problem?”

“What’s _ your _ problem, _ friend _?” Gilbert spat back at him. Roy smirked and let out a dry chuckle as he cocked his head to the side. 

“_My problem _ ? Hmm, let me think.” He tapped his chin as if he was deep in thought and began pacing in front of the stairs. “Well I have problems with quite a few things actually. The color fuchsia, chalk dust, messy hair and clothes, someone hurting people I deeply care for,” he peered over as he ceased pacing. “Oh, and poor little farm boys who are trying to pretend to be something they are not.” Gilbert felt his face flush out of rage and embarrassment as Roy stepped forward again, their noses almost touching. “Which, I’m pretty sure you share at least three of those things, don’t you Gil?” Gilbert bit down on the scab in his cheek, causing his mouth to fill with metallic tasting liquid. _ Don’t stoop to his level. Focus on Anne. _

He swallowed, pushing past Roy to make his way to the pitcher. “We should get back upstairs.” Gilbert mumbled. 

“You’re right. We should.” Roy stepped up the platform, ready to ascend the stairs before he quickly turned back. “Oh, one more question, Gil. Do you know where Anne’s soap is? She so enjoys when I wash her.”

Gilbert stiffened. “What did you say?”

Roy shrugged. “I know it's taboo to see each other before the wedding but...we simply couldn’t resist.” Gilbert felt his stomach fall to the floor, he felt as if he could vomit. He must have paled because Roy smiled wickedly. “Man to man? She has the softest breasts...” 

Rage blinded Gilbert as he threw himself across the kitchen, taking Roy's shirt within his hands and shoving him against the wall with such force he was sure he would push him through it. 

Roy cackled. “So you do have feelings!” 

Gilbert’s voice came out close to a growl. “Don’t talk about her like she is your goddamn play thing.” 

“Oh? And why not?” Roy grinned maliciously, it was almost as if he was having fun. “She’s _ my _ bride to be. That makes her _ my _toy to play with.” 

The next moments passed in a blur. Roy being thrown from the steps and crashing into the kitchen table. Gilbert throwing a rage fueled punch into his opponent's cheek. Mrs Lynde's screams of horror as Marilla cried for Cole. Roy laughed as he caught Gilbert’s second punch and shoved him into the wall. Gilbert’s head bounced against the wall, dazing him for only a moment as he saw Roy beeline for the door.

He caught his footing, sprinting after the man who was trying to escape. Marilla screamed for him to stop but he couldn’t hear her. After days of feeling rage and keeping it contained, it had finally boiled out of the pot.

Roy was waiting just outside the door by the wall, holding a foot out as he ran through the door. Gilbert tripped, flying across the porch before crashing into Anne’s dormant daylilies. He rolled onto his back, gasping for the wind that was just knocked out of him. Roy jumped off the porch, smirking down at his fallen foe. “Well, that was easier than I thought.” He cocked an eyebrow, as if he was genuinely confused. “Still have _ no _ idea what she sees in you.”

“You don’t... deserve...her.” Gilbert panted out between each labored breath. 

Roy let out a hearty chuckle. “That’s real rich coming from you.” Gilbert ignored him and tried to reach for the standing man ankle. Roy pressed down hard with the heel of his shoe, applying just enough pressure to pin his hand to the ground. “Do you realize how many times you have broken her heart? How many times I heard her cry over you?” He pressed down harder with each question as he bared his teeth. Gilbert groaned, he felt like his hand was going to be crushed at any moment. “And now I come here and find out you’re nothing special. Nothing more than a…” He felt his knuckle shift, if Roy stepped down much harder, his hand would break. “Pathetic...little...”

“Royal!” Cole shouted as he threw open the screened door. Roy's attention shot to Cole, lifting his foot just enough that Gilbert could pull his hand free. Gilbert rolled over, grabbing his opponents ankle and yanking him to the ground. 

“Gilbert, stop!” Diana screamed, but he couldn’t bear her. All he could hear was ringing in his ears, hatred consuming his soul. Cole lunged forward just as Gilbert was about climb on top of the downed man and wrapped his arms around him. Roy scrambled to his feet and sprinted away. 

Gilbert struggled in Cole’s grasp before he reared his head back, making contact with some part of Cole's face. “Shit!” Cole yelled, releasing Gilbert. He didn’t hesitate for a moment before he dug his feet into the dirt and took off after the man he had quickly come to hate.

They were halfway across the yard when he finally began to close the distance between them. Gilbert’s lungs stung and is head throbbing but the pain was good, it made him push himself. It added to the rage. 

Gilbert was a few paces away when Roy made the mistake of looking back, causing him to stumble. _ Got you. _ He smiled devilishly as his fingers curled around his opponents collar and pulled him back sharply. Roy crashed to the ground, winded just as Gilbert had been a few moments prior. 

Diana and Cole screamed for him to stop. He wanted to listen, he knew he should listen. But every ounce of anger that he had suppressed, not only from this weekend, but the last two years since he proposed to the wrong woman, was finally out. Gilbert threw himself on top of the man who earned the affection of the woman he truly loved, the man who he thought he should be. Roy struggled beneath him but it was no use, Gilbert’s full weight rested on top of him and his arms were pinned. He raised his fist when Cole grabbed his arm. “Stop! This isn’t you!” he cried. Gilbert threw his elbow back, making contact with his friend's stomach. Cole stumbles back and Gilbert brought his fist down, making contact with Roy’s cheek. 

“Jerry! Jerry!” Diana screamed towards the barn as a second punch came down, this one grazing connecting with his opponents lip. _ Where’s that smug grin now? _He thought. His knuckles stung, he was sure that skin had broken on them but that didn’t stop him from pulling his fists back for another punch. 

He aimed for Roy's nose, hoping to shift it just enough that he would have to breathe through his mouth for the rest of his life but was stopped when strong arms wrapped around him. Suddenly he was being pulled up and dragged away from his opponent. 

“Get off of me!” he growled, thrashing wildly, hoping to break free. He wasn’t done yet. He wanted to hit him harder, he wanted him to ensure he would never disrespect Anne again. 

“Calm down!” Jerry shouted. Gilbert thrashed, doing everything in his power to break free but it was no use. Jerry had become the caretaker of the farm since Matthew’s passing, which meant not only did he have almost a foot on Gilbert, but he had the muscles to match. If Gilbert had continued working at the farm, perhaps he could stand a chance but his months in Paris had made him weaker. He stopped thrashing, his fury simmering down. Jerry still held onto him in fear he would soon lash out again.

Cole dropped down next to Roy, who had somehow moved himself into a sitting position. He lifted a tender hand to Roy’s cheek, almost appearing like he was going to stroke it, when he quickly shifted it down to his shoulder. “Are you alright?”

“Peachy.” He mumbled, spitting out a glob of blood. Gilbert smirked in satisfaction.

Diana breathed a sigh of relief before she shot daggers to Gilbert, stomping furiously towards him. It was only then Jerry let go of him. He knew all too well of the wrath of the young Barry woman. She lifted a sharp hand and smacked him. “What the _ hell _ is wrong with you Gilbert?!”

Gilbert’s blood boiled again as his hand went to nurse his cheek. “What’s wrong with _ me _?” He laughed dryly and pointed to Roy. “You should be asking what is wrong with him! He has been an absolute prick for no goddamn reason!”

“Oh, I have my reasons.” Roy said dryly as Cole helped him to his feet. “And all of them involve you being a selfish bastard.” Gilbert’s fists formed once again, begging to meet his face once again when Diana forced herself in between the two men.

“That is enough!” She boomed, looking between the two sides. “_Both _of you are being selfish bastards! Have you both forgotten why we are here? Anne!” They looked away from each other and to the ground, both feeling very ashamed. Diana’s voice shook as she spoke. “She is sick, so very sick. And she needs us.” Her eyes began welling tears and her knees were wobbling so intensely Gilbert thought she might fall over. “All of us are important to her…”

“Some more than others.” Roy said smugly and Gilbert couldn’t stop himself. He marched forward, ready to tackle Roy back to the ground when Diana screamed.

“_They aren’t in love! _”

Gilbert stumbled as he skidded to a stop, his heart racing. Did she just say what he think she said? He turned slowly towards her.“What did you just say?” 

Roy raised a hand to his chest dramatically. “Diana, how dare you insinuate…”

“Enough Roy,” Cole placed a tentative hand back on his friend’s shoulder. “You just picked a fight with him and lost, don’t you think this charade has gone too far?”

Roy gritted his teeth, looking ready to argue with everyone. Cole shook his head gently and Roy scowled. “Dammit…”

The group stood silently, all exchanging glances that ranged from anger, sadness, and utter confusion. No one spoke. No one moved. It was as if time had stopped. A hawk screech overhead, indicating that time was still moving forward, that what Gilbert heard was in fact reality and not a strange dream. 

“Well...this is awkward.” Jerry laughed dryly, hoping to ease some of the tension but it only earned him a glare from everyone. He nervously ran his fingers through his hair. “Sorry.”

Gilbert finally began to process the words Diana had said fully. _ They weren’t… in love? _He looked to Diana, hoping she would clarify on what was said but her eyes looked remorsefully at her two friends. Cole looked nervous as he held tightly to Roy’s shoulder, as if it were the only thing keeping him upright. 

“I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have... it wasn’t my place...” Diana whispered.

“It’s alright Diana.” Roy’s demeanor had changed completely. Instead the air of arrogance in his voice, it was soft, kind almost as he spoke. He looked up at Cole.“ As usual, Cole is right. I went too far.” Roy brought a tender hand up to meet Coles, both smiling gently at one another. 

Gilbert rubbed his temples, his head was really starting to hurt now. “Will someone_ please _explain to me what is going on?” Three pairs of eyes found there way to his, a mix of embarrassment, anxiety, and what he could only guess was fear, filled each one. He turned to Diana, hoping that she would explain her words to him. “Diana, what do you mean Roy and Anne aren’t in love?”

She hesitated, ashamedly looking down at the ground. “It isn’t my place…” 

“Gilbert, allow me to explain.” Cole stepped forward, positioning his body defensively in front of Roy. He took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. “What Diana said, it’s true. Roy_ isn’t _ in love with Anne.” 

“_Ah merde _!” Jerry mumbled. 

Gilbert shook his head and pressed his fingernails into his palm. His anger was trying to make a reappearance. “If he isn’t in love with her...why would he propose?” He wanted to get his hands around the smug bastards neck but one glance at Roy, all forms of confidence had been erased. Instead his gaze was to the floor, almost cowering behind the blonde man. The mere sight of it almost made Gilbert laugh. “What? No fancy words now? No explanation on why you would want to marry someone you don’t love?”

“Oh, you’re one to talk,” Roy mumbled. Gilbert pulled his fist back, ready to throw himself over Cole when Diana pushed him back. 

“It was Anne’s idea!” She screamed. 

Gilbert’s stomach dropped with his fist. _ Anne knew? _“Wh-what? Why... would she do that?”

“She was doing it for us.” Cole's voice cracked as he spoke, tears filling his eyes as he reached back and grabbed Roys hand within his own. Both of them were shaking. “To help protect us.” Gilbert was completely lost now. _ Why would two men over six foot need Anne to protect them? _

"_Mon dieu _,” Jerry whispered from directly behind Gilbert. “You… two are...”

Cole and Roy both held their breath, waiting for Gilbert to finally place the final piece of the puzzle together. His eyes trailed down to their enlaced hands, realization dawned on him. His jaw dropped as he tried to form words. “Wait, you two are...?”

Diana quickly stepped forward to place herself in between the men. “Gilbert, you may not like Roy, but Cole is your friend. Don’t do anything rash.”

“Anne… you two...” Gilbert worked the words the best he could. His head was spinning, he wasn’t sure if he could walk straight let alone do anything stupid. “In love... but Roy is engaged to Anne... Anne knew…” Suddenly, a happier thought formed and he looked up. “Roy doesn’t love Anne?”

Diana opened her mouth but Roy stepped forward. He looked confident now, almost returning to the cockiness that Gilbert had come to know him for. “I think it would be best if I explained. But we should start making our way back.” He cast a glance towards the house, where Marilla could be seen standing on the porch. “I’m sure Miss Cuthbert will want an explanation of our… activities.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So fun fact: I actually had my husband help me with some of the fight sequences...and by that, I mean he let me fight him for reference. We stan one supportive and slightly confused hubby.  
See you tomorrow dears!


	9. Roy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: talks of suicide and depression. 
> 
> I also want to take a brief moment to thank you all for your incredibly kind words and support throughout this story. I read and appreciate every bit of feedback and am so grateful for each and every one of you! xoxo

** _Chapter Nine: Roy_ **

** _“Your mother and I have worked too damn hard to ensure your future and here you are trying to throw it away? You’re a disgrace, you’re filth. An embarrassment to the Gardner name.”_ ** _ The eldest son of the Gardner family held the half empty bottle of whisky to his lips as he stared out into the never ending sea. Waves crashed high against the pier, their anger growing with the incoming storm. A particularly enraged one flew high, soaking through his shoes and socks. He couldn’t feel it anymore though, his toes had gone numb around the fourth swig of the bottle. Tears dropped, freezing to his cheeks in the frigid February winds. _ _ **“You will take a wife, she will bear your children, and you will be the perfect husband and businessman. You will not sully our good name because you want to gallivant around like a goddamn ponce.”** _

_ “Sod off, you prick.” Roy mumbled into the bottle as the liquid fire slid down his throat. The burn felt good, comforting almost._

_When he was a boy, he swore that he would never be a drinking man like his father, but as he got older, he began to get these attacks that would make his heart race and the drink seemed to be the only thing that could calm him. He would never drink too much, only just a nip but today, he needed an extra dose of courage. _

_ It was quiet where he was, only a few brave souls wandering the streets but no one paid him any mind. Nor should they have, the temperature was well below freezing. They were in a hurry, trying to make it to their destination without catching their death, which would only take a few hours. Four hours to be precise. He knows, he calculated that when he was in the early stages of planning how he wanted his life to end. _

_ He had considered lying down on a park bench and slowly letting his body shut down. It seemed like a very good option. He would most certainly be found quickly and it would cause quite the scandal for his parents. But then, with it being so public, he also ran into the problem of others recognizing him and dragging him home. No, freezing to death wouldn’t work. _

_ His mind traveled through so many different options. Each more morbid than the last but none quite appealing to him. He wanted his death to be meaningful to him. _

_ That was when his mind went to the sea. Roy had always adored the water, considering it to be vast with possibilities and wonder. Water in the ocean was free, uncontrollable..something that he had always desired. His thoughts then wandered to a book he had read a few months ago on one of his private nighttime strolls. Within that book, the main character has her own awakening within the water of the ocean, much like his own awakening when he was swimming with Matthew Clyde in the sixth grade. And much like Edna Pontellier, his story would also end with his final descent into the ocean. Yes, the sea would work just fine. _

_ So there he stood, downing a bottle of the finest whiskey the bartender would allow him (after throwing it on his father's ever growing tab, of course) staring out at what would soon become his tomb. It would be cold, sure. It would hurt, of course. But he would finally be free the chains that had bound him his entire life. _

_ He swallowed the last drop before he threw the bottle behind him, not caring who would step on the shards of glass that were now littering the pier. It was time, Roy was ready. He took a few steps back, ready to throw himself over the rail. Earlier, he decided that he didn’t want his last thoughts to be fear, he wanted to think of the last time he felt true happiness. His mind wandered to the handsome artist with strawberry blonde hair that would tickle his face as they kissed, his blue eyes that looked like a cloudless summer morning. Roy swallowed, smiling ever so slightly at the solace the nameless man he had met only but one time brought him. Yes, he would miss him. _

_ One step, then another, he quickened his pace ready to throw himself over the rail. _

** _CRASH_ ** _ ! Roy was knocked sideways, landing in the icy snow with a hard thud. “What the bloody hell?” He mumbled, rubbing his shoulder that was most certainly going to bruise. _

_ Roy looked up, his gaze connecting with the most peculiar and panicked ginger-haired woman. “Oh my word! I am so deeply sorry! Are you alright? I lose my head whenever I am deeply in thought, Marilla says it will be my death, but I find myself coming from the most frightfully frustrating situations and I was hoping that taking a walk could help me clear my head before tea. But oh look! I have gone and run into somebody again! Stupid, you’re so stupid.” He was unsure if she was talking to him or if she was scolding herself as he cocked an eyebrow. Her eyes widened as she sputtered, her entire face darkening three shades of pink. “Oh no, not you. I was referring to myself. I am the stupid one, I ran into you after all! I’m sure you are of incredible intelligence.” She shook her head, realizing she was talking nonsense to a man who was sitting in a pile of snow. “Here,” she extended her hand out. “Let me help you.” _

_ Still confused and unsure of what just happened, he hesitantly took the strange womans hand and much to his surprise she pulled him up with ease. Roy dusted the snow from his pants as the woman continued rambling. “I am truly, terribly sorry sir. I do hope you can forgive me. But as I said, whenever my mind is burdened I tend to forget myself and my mind is definitely most troubled at the moment. I… I am talking too much, aren’t I?” He wasn't what to say or if she would even let him get in a word edgewise, so instead he shook his head. “Oh, you’re too kind, truly. I have been so rude, haven’t I? Rambling on and on without so much as a proper introduction. Allow me to introduce myself, my name is Anne Shirley-Cuthbert. And if you ever feel so inclined to spell it, please do spell Anne with an e.” She extended her hand once more, only this time hoping he would shake it. _

_ He accepted it, giving it two firm shakes.“Uh, Roy. Royal Gardner.” _

_ Anne beamed, grasping tighter to his hand. “Well, Royal Gardner, it is ever so lovely to make your acquaintance. Even though I do wish the meeting could have happened another way besides my running into you.” _

_ “Um, well, it’s quite alright. I was just…” His words drifted away from him as he stared out into the ocean. Anne’s face softened, her gaze following his. _

_ “You know, I’ve always liked when the ocean was like this.” She dropped his hand, gliding over to the railing where she peered over the edge. _

** _Who is this woman?_ ** _ Roy thought to himself, still confused more than he had probably ever been in his nineteen years. He knew he should walk away, he had a plan to finish but there was something about this fire haired woman that captivated him. It was almost as if she had put a spell on him. He stepped closer to rail, this time having zero desire to jump, only curiosity for what she was going to say next. “I’ve always liked it when the waters are so rough that it appears every wave is fighting against one another.” _

_ “That’s different.” He said, still unable to pull his eyes away from this mysterious woman. She brushed a stray curl behind her ear, her fingers were quivering from the bitter air. _

_ “I suppose it is. But there is nothing wrong with being different in my opinion.” Her eyes never left the battling waters as a smile grew on her lips. “Society looks down upon those who do not follow the norms that they have put in place. They want everyone to remain steady, to know their place and follow preset paths. But to me, people are like waves. No wave is the same and not a single person is the same. Don’t you think?” She peered over to Roy, who was hanging tightly to every word she spoke. Somewhere in the distance, the clock struck three and her face dropped. “Oh no! I am going to be late!” _

_ She pushed past Roy, who was stunned by her sudden departure. This woman, who had just crashed into his life so suddenly was running out of it just as quick. He wanted to let her go, to never see her again and go continue with his plan but something nagged at the back of his mind. “Wait! Miss! I have a question,” he cried, chasing her down the pier. She slowed her pace, allowing him to catch up with her. _

_ “Yes?” Her smile was so soft that he knew it could calm the most intense storms. _

_ “You said people are like oceans?” She nodded as he fought to catch his breath. “So… why… do you like these types of water? Couldn’t that be seen as the bad in people.” _

_ Anne’s smile widened. “I suppose some could. But I prefer to see it as something else entirely.” He nodded, urging her to continue. “I see the rough seas as a conflict within a person. Their thoughts and feelings going to war with one another when life gets difficult.” Roy tried not to react but his eyes began to burn and he knew it wasn’t just from the chill in the air. “But then, when life begins to get easier, that war calms, much like the sea after a storm. Does that make any sense?” _

_ Roy tears poured over the lids of his eyes as he nodded. He tried to hide his eyes but it was too late, she had seen and offered him a handkerchief lined with purple and pink flowers. Anne looked down the road, allowing Roy a minute to dry his eyes. “Thank you,” he whispered as he handed her back the cloth. _

_ She accepted it as a devilish smirk danced on her lips. “Mr. Gardner, forgive me for being bold but how would you like to join my friend and I for tea?” _

_ “Oh, I couldn’t intrude…” _

_ Anne wrapped her arm within his and began dragging him along side her. “Nonsense! Cole loves company! Oh, I am sure you two will simply adore one another. He’s an artist, you know.” _

_ \------- _

Gilbert’s head felt like it was going to explode. Roy’s story and confession mixed with being slammed against the wall earlier was making thinking way more difficult than it needed to be. “You’re telling me… that Anne…”

“Saved my life.” Roy finished for him, rolling his eyes as he took large strides towards Green Gables. “I just said that. Keep up.” His pace quickened, practically breaking into a run as he left the group behind. Gilbert walked alongside Cole, while Diana and Jerry trailed behind, walking close enough that their fingers would occasionally graze against the others. Gilbert pinched the bridge of his nose, he _ really _couldn’t deal with another secret relationship today. 

“Sorry about Royal,” Cole said, not taking his eyes off of his love but offered a polite smile. “His temper has gotten a lot better, but he slips up on occasion. He is actually pretty great once you get to know him.”

“Uh, yeah, I’m sure.” Gilbert rubbed the back of his head, where an egg sized lump had begun to form. His eyes drifted to Cole, feeling instantly remorseful when he noticed his lip had been bleeding. “Sorry about your lip.”

Cole smirked, shaking his head. “You know, I warned him to not pick a fight with you, told him that he would probably lose. But whenever Anne is upset, he becomes incredibly protective over her.” He peered over to Gilbert. “Suppose he is like you in that sense.” Gilbert raised an eyebrow in confusion. Cole chuckled. “Hey, don’t deny it. I saw Billy’s shiner the day after you decked him.”

Gilbert bit his lip, he had totally forgotten about the first time he let his anger get the better of him. The right hook to Billy Andrews face had been a long time coming and had been incredibly satisfying, even if it left his knuckles throbbing the following morning. He looked at his knuckles. They had stopped bleeding thankfully, but they were caked with dirt and grime.

“Oh no,” Cole mumbled, Gilbert looked up to see a furious Marilla scolding Roy as if he were a small child. His stomach dropped, he would take a fist to the face over receiving one of Marilla’s scoldings any day.

“Of all the _ childish _ and _ selfish _ things you boys could have gone and done, a fight? In my _ clean _ kitchen no less?!” Marilla’s voice was sharp. Her gaze never left Roy, but she pointed a harsh finger directly at Gilbert. “Over here. _ Now _.”

Gilbert swallowed, stepping slowly towards what could be his eminent doom. He took his place next to a nervous Roy while Marilla glared at both of them. Over the course of his life, he had not found himself afraid often, but he knew that the look Marilla was giving Roy and he would haunt him for the rest of his days. “Marilla…” 

“Don’t you Marilla me.” He cowered, remembering days ago standing in the very same spot and her being overjoyed to embrace him. She crossed her arms. “Honestly, I expected more from both of you!” She scoffed, focusing fully on Gilbert. “Especially you, Gilbert. I know for a fact that John raised you better.”

Her words stung, as if she was physically smacking him with each syllable. Marilla was right. Even though his father had taught him to stand up to injustice and to always protect those he loved, he threw the first punch on a purely selfish reason. He couldn’t meet her eyes as heat crept upon his cheeks. 

“Miss Cuthbert…” Roy’s voice sounded confident, but he flinched when Marilla shot her daggers at him once more. “Ma’am, Gilbert… well it wasn’t all his fault. I said some rather vulgar words towards him…” He swallowed as Gilbert slowly lifted his eyes towards the man he had almost pulverized just moments before. What was he doing? Roy cleared his throat as Marilla looked on impatiently. “Cole and Anne, well they have told me that I have a horrible temper and it is something I am trying to improve. Gilbert…” he hesitated, as if the next words were sour in his mouth. “Well, Gil just knocked some sense into me.” Roy smiled and held out his hand. “Gil, I apologize for my childish actions.”

Gilbert had to hinge his jaw in order for it to not fall to the floor as he took Roy’s hand cautiously, really unsure if the apology was genuine or just for show. Roy squeezed Gilbert’s hand, digging his fingers into his scabbed knuckles. _Well, that answers that. _“And I apologize for hitting you… multiple times.” Gilbert said the words cordially enough, but he squeezed Roy’s hand with every ounce of strength he had left. The men looked up to Marilla, hands still locked and each one trying to squeeze harder than the other, and flashed boyish grins. 

Her hawk eyes appeared unconvinced but after the events of this whole weekend, she was too exhausted to care. “I expect better from both of you from now on.” They nodded frantically, much like two schoolboys who had just escaped a lashing from their marm. “Good. Diana,” Diana pulled away from Jerry and straightened. “Boil some water for these two, they will not be stepping in my house until they have washed themselves.”

Gilbert looked down, realizing just how dirty both he and Roy had gotten. His shirt was covered in dirt and grass stains, Roy being worse off than him. His entire back was caked with mud, his hair slowly falling out from its gelled form, and his lip had a small cut on the right hand corner. 

Diana nodded, “Yes Marilla. I’ll go get that started.” She took timid steps away from Jerry.

Marilla pursed her lips, keenly aware that Diana wouldn’t leave him first. “Jerry, have you milked Prejudice this morning?” 

A blush arose on his cheeks. “No ma’am. I’ll go do that now.” Jerry turned and walked away quickly, casting a brief glance to Diana before heading into the barn.

Marilla sighed and mumbled. “You children will be the death of me.” She looked back over the men and pointed to the steps below her. “Sit right here, Diana will be out shortly after she brings Anne up some water as well.” She stopped short, holding the door open for Diana and Cole. “I trust you two are going to be civil.”

“Yes ma’am.” They said in unison. For two men that were not fond of the other, Gilbert was starting to realize they may be more similar than he originally thought.

“Good.” Marilla followed Diana and Cole through the door, leaving the two men alone in silence.

Roy and Gilbert exchanged glances and pulled apart, Roy wiping his hand on his dirty pants as if the germs he received from the handshake were worse than the mud. Gilbert rolled his eyes and looked down at the daylily bushes that had broken his fall earlier. He bent down, trying his best to fluff the fallen buds and leaves, but they continued to droop sadly. “Anne’s gonna kill me,” he mumbled to himself. 

Roy chuckled from the steps where he had decided to rest. “That’s for sure.” Gilbert rolled his eyes once more, not wanting to cause new tensions. Roy bit his lip, realizing he was behaving poorly and rubbed the back of his neck. “So… Anne told me you helped her plant those after Matthew died.” 

_ Be civil _. Gilbert packed the soil around the plant to assist it in standing upright. “Yeah...I did. She had a rough go of it for a while after he passed. One day she made sixteen apple pies...” 

“Sixteen? That’s impressive,” Roy laughed genuinely. 

Gilbert smirked. “Delicious too. Pretty sure all of Avonlea gained ten pounds that day. We figured we needed to find a healthier outlet for her.” He wiped his nose, the chill in the air was beginning to make it run. “So when she suggested that Green Gables had become gray without him, we went on a search for any vendors that still had blooms left. Could only find these but they brought her joy, so it made me happy.” 

Roy nodded, eyes trailing to the flowers. “Well they’re beautiful. She said whenever we found a home that she wanted to transfer some of the bushes from here. She played it off that she simply wanted a piece of home... but secretly I think she wanted something to remind her of you.” Gilbert looked away from the flowers as sadness crept in. “So you’re really not gonna ask me, are you?” Roy asked. 

Gilbert met his eyes. “Ask you what?” 

It was Roy’s turn to roll his eyes. “All the questions that are swarming through that tiny brain of yours.” He tapped his temple. Gilbert bit his lip, earning an exasperated sigh from Roy. “Alright, here’s some samples for you: Why would Anne want to marry me even though she knew I could never desire her for anything more than her friendship? What exactly is mine and Cole's relationship? Why was I being such an ass to you if I wasn’t in love with Anne? Take your pick.”

Gilbert swallowed harshly. Every question Roy had stated had swam through his head and he knew he wanted answers to all of them. Roy smirked and patted the deck next to him. “Common Gil, ask me anything.”

The standing man considered this, before he sat down on the porch a little farther than Roy’s hand. “Alright. Well let’s start with the first one. Diana said the engagement was Anne’s idea...”

“It was,” Roy said bluntly. 

“If she knew about...” he carefully considered his words. “About your lack of desire for her, why would she offer to marry you?”

Roy sighed and leaned back on his elbows, staring out to the horizon. “Well it’s like Cole said. She wanted to help protect the two of us. My family, as I’m sure you gathered, aren’t the most accepting folks. Probably would’ve had me arrested if it wouldn’t cause such a scandal for them.” Gilbert's eyes widened. How could parents do something so cruel to their own son? “Instead, they threatened to disown me. Honestly it wouldn’t be a huge deal, I’m sure I could figure out my way on my own… but I have two sisters and a brother that are my world and I couldn’t bare to lose them.”

Gilbert cocked an eyebrow. “So instead you tried to end your life?”

“Yeah, wasn't my best plan now was it,” Roy said with a chuckle. “_ Anyway_. The day I met Anne, she too was bothered. Turns out she had been having trouble with a publisher and her book.” Anne had written him about that. That letter had been difficult for him to read. It had been smudged in various places from what he had assumed were her tears. He almost hopped on the next steamer out of Paris right then and there. “Anyway, the publisher she went to just so happens to be a friend of my old man. He is a sexist prick if you ask me, much like dear old dad.” Roy dug into his coat pocket, producing a small flask where he unscrewed the top and took a swig before turning his attention back to a shocked Gilbert. “Oh, sorry. It’s an old habit that I can’t seem to break. Cole and Anne have been helping me quit… Been doing a pretty good job but I keep it around for when... well, when this gets bad.” Gilbert looked down at Roy’s hands to see them shaking. “It’s weird, like my heart races and I start shaking. The whisky takes the edge off just enough for me to calm down.” 

Gilbert had read about people who would feel their heart racing and having these attacks that would prevent them from functioning. It was some sort of panic disorder. The texts told him that these people were mentally sick and should be thrown in an institution for treatment. But then in June, he sat in a lecture done by a woman alienist who had been practicing a new form of treatment called talk therapy. It seemed more humane and safer, and it appeared to actually be working in a lot of cases. “Roy, have you talked to anyone about what you’ve been going through? I met with this lecturer ...”

“I’m fine,” he said sternly as he took another large swig. Gilbert decided to not press. “Now back to the topic at hand.'' He tucked the flask back into his shirt and cleared his throat. “Anyway, upon realizing that I have an infatuation with Cole… Anne came up with a proposition. We would marry, appease my family so I wouldn’t be disowned and could still be in my siblings lives. Not to mention she would allow me to meet with Cole whenever I so chose. My only job was that I helped her find a decent publisher that would give her novel a chance. To her, it was the perfect plan.”

“Perfect?” Gilbert scoffed. He couldn’t believe that Anne, the romantical fire sprite that he knew and loved would come up with such a plan. “But… what if she fell in love with someone else? She would be trapped.”

Roy let our a booming laugh. “Yeah Doc, I don’t think that’s possible.” 

Gilbert lifted his eyebrows. “What do you mean? Anne is young, intelligent, wonderful… stunning.” Roy peered sideways as Gilbert looked off dreamily, his mind drifting to Anne’s ethereal beauty. Once he caught the other man staring, he shook his head. “Surely she would find a man to love her and she would love him in return.”

“Wow, are you really that dense?” Roy asked curtly. 

“Excuse me?” Gilbert asked, trying his best to not get offended. 

Roy pinched the bridge of his nose, annoyed. “Let me put this plainly for you: Anne agreed to marry me because she knew she would never fall in love.”

Gilbert lifted his eyebrows. “And how could she possibly know that?”

“_Oh my Lord, _how did you get into medical school?” Roy groaned and adjusted himself so he was facing Gilbert head on. “Because she is already in love with someone! And he is too much of an idiot to notice it.”

His heart sank. _ Anne was in love with someone? _“She’s in love with someone else?”

Roy grunted, fighting off a scream. “You! She is in love with you, you dense bastard!”

Gilbert felt his lungs tighten. “Wait… what you’re saying… Anne’s in love with me?”

Roy clapped slowly. “Ladies and gentlemen, he does have a brain! Yes, you moron. Anne is in love with you. Has been for _ years! _” Gilbert couldn’t breathe, his heart started to race and his vision blurred. Anne… loves him? Not just loves but is in love with him? 

“She loves me?” His voice came out no louder than a whisper. “Anne loves me?” He repeated still in disbelief, only this time the words were tasting sweeter. “Anne loves me!” He jumped up from the porch, he couldn’t help it. He felt like he could run to the lake of Shining Waters, perhaps even farther. Anne loves him! He wanted to scream, he wanted to announce to the world that Anne Shirley Cuthbert, the fire goddess herself was in love with him. 

“Took you long enough,” Roy rolled his eyes but a small smile crawled on his lips.

Gilbert beamed. “I have… I have to see her.” He quickly stepped towards the house, not wanting to waste a single moment, when Roy blocked his path. “Do not make me hit you again.”

He held his hands up defensively. “Look, I get it, I do. But if I’m being honest, you look and smell like a horse's rear end.” As much as Gilbert hated to admit it, Roy was right. With how bad Anne’s lungs were, he didn’t want to chance bringing more dirt and dust into her room. Roy stepped back, plopping back down on the porch step. “Not to mention, you’re still marrying Winifred. Unless you have finally come to your senses on that matter.” Gilbert debated on whether to tell him his decision on that matter, but he was still focused on Anne’s love for him. 

He knew sitting wasn’t an option for him, so instead he paced, five steps, turn, five more steps. He was unsure how many times he repeated that process, but he could feel the annoyance radiate off of Roy, so he decided to try and sit, his leg bouncing madly. Roy rolled his eyes. “Would you calm down? You’re driving me insane.” 

Gilbert pressed his foot firmly against the ground and mumbled out a “sorry” before he blurted out. “You are right, by the way.”

“Uh, okay...” Roy said, unsure of how to respond to the declaration. 

Gilbert looked out to the horizon. “I’m not marrying Winifred. I decided last night… I don’t love her. Not like I have loved Anne. It wouldn’t be fair to her for me to keep her away from someone who could put her first.” 

“Huh. Alright. Uh, congratulations I guess?” Roy mumbled, still confused. 

He continued, not hearing Roy’s words. “I know it’s wrong, I asked her to marry me when I didn’t even understand what love was. And I thought that perhaps since she was helping me follow my dream that I loved her,” he bit his lip, keenly aware now of how much of a fool he had been. “So you’re right, I’m a selfish bastard.”

Roy knitted his eyebrows together. “Is that supposed to be an apology?” 

Gilbert turned to face the man he considered his enemy hours before. “Yeah. I guess it is.” 

Roy nodded slowly, as if to consider it he was going to accept it or not. “Well, then I’m sorry for saying the things I said about Anne. In case you haven’t realized, none of them were true.” Gilbert smirked, he had figured as much. “Anyway, truth is, I wanted to get a rise out of you. Anne shed so many tears over you, I wanted to hurt you worse than you had her. Didn’t expect it to backfire on me.”

They both looked over one another, both fighting smiles before they both let out hearty chuckles. It didn’t feel awkward, in fact it almost felt normal. Like two friends who were sharing a laugh. Gilbert smirked, holding out his hand. “So what do you say, friends?”

Roy sneered. “Hardly. I still think you’re a prick and an idiot.” Gilbert tried to not feel offended as his hand fell, only for Roy to grab it firmly. “But I will say truce. At least until you decide to be an idiot again and hurt Anne.” 

Gilbert smiled, he had no intention of making that mistake again. “Truce.” They shook, neither grip too tight this time, a true handshake between comrades. “So, what does this mean for your engagement then?”

Roy looked back out to the horizon and dropped Gilbert’s hand. “I’ll break it off, it was selfish of me to accept the proposition in the first place.”

“What about your family?”

Roy shrugged. “I’ll tell them the truth, that I cannot marry a woman I don’t love. My siblings will hopefully understand but my parents will probably write me off, blacklist me.” He licked his lips, his eyes saddening. “But Anne will be free and for the first time, I will be too. I will be surrounded by friends and my love.”

Gilbert swallowed, nervous to ask the following question. “So you and Cole are a couple?” Roy nodded hesitantly, his body language changed and became more defensive. “So that makes you...” his voice trailed off. He was unsure of the correct term to use.

Roy chuckled coldly. “Homosexual. A fairy. A pounce. Take your pick. I’ve been called it all.” He looked away, almost as if he were ashamed of who he was. “And I know I disgust you for it too.”

“That’s not true. You nor Cole disgust me in the least,” Gilbert said sternly. Roy looked up in surprise. “Cole has been my friend since we were children. My views of him won’t change based off of whom he loves. And even though I’m not your biggest fan, Anne and Cole are apart of both of our families, so that makes you and I family in our own strange way.”

Gilbert couldn’t imagine what Roy must’ve thought he would say, but from the tears forming in his lids, he could tell it wasn’t that. “Thank you...”

“Gilbert! Gilbert!” Diana screamed from inside the house. He shot to his feet and threw open the door, ready to fly up the stairs when Diana knocked into him.

“Di, what’s wrong?!” he yelled as he caught her. 

“Anne’s turning blue! Her lips, they’re...” Gilbert didn’t let Diana finish when he pushed past her and sprinted up the stairs, taking them two at a time. He ran down the hallway and through Anne’s door, eyes catching Cole cowering in the corner. Gilbert looked to the bed where Anne’s breathing was shallow and quick, her face whiter than cotton. Except for her lips, which were normally red as a rose in bloom, now had begun to take a blue hue. She reached for him weakly, gasping.

“Hey, Anne, it’s okay, I’m here. I’m here.” Gilbert grabbed her hand as she tried to catch her breath. Fear filled her eyes as she squeezed his hand, breaking through the freshly forming skin and letting blood drip down his hands. He needed to calm her and steady her breathing. “Anne, I need you to try and breathe in through your nose, okay? Through your nose.” It was too late now, she was panicking. He sat down on the bed next to her, trying his best to remain calm.

Roy and Diana barrelled through the door, Marilla following close. She pushed past the two young adults, running to the other side. “Gilbert, what do we do?” She asked, her voice rising as she held on tightly to Anne’s arm.

Gilbert’s mind swirled, a million thoughts running through it at once._ What do I do? What do I do? Medicine. What medicine? Is there any? Why can’t I think of what to do? _

“Tell us what to do,” Diana asked with a shaky voice as Roy went to Cole, taking him in his arms. _ Think Gilbert. Think _. Gilbert tried to tune out the commotion around him, but all he could feel was everyone screaming and crying for him to fix this. His hand was throbbing from Anne’s iron grip. 

“Dammit Gil, tell us what to do!” Roy shouted as he squeezed a praying Cole tighter.

“Come on Anne,” He yelled, trying to do his breathing just as he was instructing. Through his nose, out his mouth. She looked like she was trying to understand and follow, but he could tell the pain it caused her was close to unbearable. Why couldn’t he think of what to do? This is what he was trained for. 

“Gilbert!” Diana screamed. _ Shut up, shut up. Everyone shut up! _ He looked at Anne, who had tears rolling down her cheeks. She was so afraid. Diana and Marilla were afraid. Cole and Roy were afraid. Gilbert was petrified. 

He shook his head, feeling his heart pick up the pace. He didn’t know what to do. Tears began streaming down his own cheeks as he reached forward for Anne’s face, hoping his touch would heal her. But he knew it wouldn’t. Her infection was spreading, her lungs were filling with puss, and she was in excruciating pain. And his mind was blank. 

His fingers gingerly touched her chin, wiping a tear that was sliding down. “Carrots…” 

Images flashed through his mind as she stared at him through water filled eyes. Her whacking a slate across his face the first time he called her by her dreaded nickname, dancing with her in the middle of the schoolhouse, him running to her front door when the Queens results came in, planting flowers and helping her cope, their hundreds of walks through his orchard. All of those memories and he was unsure if they were ever going to be able to make any more. 

Anne leaned into his hand as if she could read his thoughts. Her breathing was quickening, her body fighting to take in oxygen. Tears dripped from her fluttering eyes, she was going to pass out. Gilbert felt a sob rising in his throat, he felt so helpless. Anne’s grip loosened on his hand as she sucking in a large breath, still trying to match her breathing to his, when something caught his eye. 

Garland hanging between her bedposts. Flowers, seashells, feathers all uniquely tied to a string. But none of those things were important. What caught his eye was the sprig of pine needles on the far left hand side. “The earth provides...” he whispered. He shot up, still holding tightly to Anne’s hand. 

“What on earth?” Marilla panicked. 

Gilbert leaned forward and without the previous nights hesitation, he pressed his lips to Anne’s forehead before pulling back with the largest grin. “Carrots, listen to me. I need to go for a bit.” She shook her head, pulling his closer. He leaned his forehead against hers. “I will be back, I promise. Until then, I need you to fight as hard as you can. Try to keep your breathing steady. You can do that for me, right?” Her eyes were filled with fear but she nodded. “Good, I won’t be long. We have much to talk about when I get back.” He smiled gently, brushing a stray curl from her face. He focused on Marilla. “Stay with her, talk her through the breathing.” Marilla nodded slowly, she was confused but he didn’t have time to explain. 

He pointed to the group of Anne’s friends in the corner. “You three, come with me.” Gilbert almost ran through the door, dragging along Diana, Cole, and Roy. “Cole, I need you to cover all the openings in Anne’s room: under the closet, doors, window, wherever you think air could escape. Get blankets, towels, even stuff clothes in there if you need too.” Gilbert commanded as they began descending the stairs.

“Uh, okay.” Cole said. Gilbert didn’t stop, crossing the kitchen to grab his coat from by the door. Mrs Lynde stood from her place by the fire, looking at the group curiously.

“What’s happening?” She asked, receiving a shoulder shrug from Diana.

Gilbert pulled his coat on, ignoring Mrs Lynde and turned to Diana. “Diana, I need you to stoke the fire, make it as hot as you can get it and boil water. When the water is boiling, Roy needs to bring it up to Anne’s room and make sure she is breathing it in. She needs steam.”

Diana beamed. “Of course! Steam!” 

“Steam?” Roy inquired. 

“Moisture helps clear the lungs. We used it to help Minnie May when she had the croup years ago.” Diana answered as Gilbert grabbed his cap and an old flour sack from by the door.

“I am furious with myself that I didn’t think of it before!” He opened the door, halfway stepping out the door.

“Where are you going?” Roy questioned. 

Gilbert grinned so wide they all probably thought he had lost his marbles. “The earth provides!” He ran through the door, only popping his head back in for a moment to yell one final command. “Steam! Constantly!” Down the yard he went, sprinting towards the barn as he screamed for Jerry. “Jerry! Jerry! Saddle Butterscotch! Saddle Butterscotch!” 

Jerry peaked his head out the barn. “Gilbert! What is going on?”

Gilbert felt like laughing, he was so excited. “I know how to help Anne!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The earth provides y'all.
> 
> Anyway, chapter 10 may take a minute because I am currently writing a short, fluffy ficlet for my secret santa! But I will most likely see you all before the new year :) Hope you enjoyed this crazy whirlwind, and see you soon!


	10. Juniper

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay loves! Was very busy with the holidays! To all that have joined due to the international drop of s3, welcome! Hope you all enjoy :) xxx

Chapter 10: Juniper

_ Summer sunsets in Avonlea were truly incomparable. Gilbert should know, he had seen them fall in many different locations over the years. Trinidad, Jamaica, Costa Rica, even in the outer borders of Europe. And none, not one had ever compared to the sun setting over the Lake of Shining Waters. From the peach and lilac streams of light that kissed each wave to the warmth of the last light of the day that contrasted the first of the cool evening breezes. He truly thought nothing would ever top it. Of course, that was until he saw the sight of two shadowy figures dancing farther down the cliff, yelling praises to the sun and all its glory. _

_ “Oh marvelous, wonderful setting sun!” Anne yelled out over the cliff, her fire locks blowing gently behind her back. “Thank you for gracing us with your presence this most glorious of evenings! Your phenomenal beauty knows no bounds!”She grinned from ear to ear as she grabbed hold of Ka’kwets hand and together they twirled. A smile beamed from the young Mi’kmaq girls face, her small braids flapping in the wind. All too quickly, she began losing her balance and sent the pair of them toppling to the ground. They exchanged a single glance before bursting into a fit of childish giggles. _

_ Gilbert smiled as he looked on, his heart feeling more at ease hearing their laughter. A few days prior, Aluk had expressed his concerns to Gilbert about Ka’kwet. He said she was barely eating or speaking to anyone, along with having extreme bouts of rage, and would scream at anyone given the chance. And in the night, she would wake up screaming so loudly that it once woke the entire village. The only activity that appeared to put her to rest was painting with her mother as she was retold stories of days long since passed. Gilbert wasn’t sure what he could do to help her - or if she would even accept it- but Anne, who had zero medical training, seemed to be helping her better than he ever could. _

_ He felt a sting cross his shoulder as he was smacked with a cluster small oak branches. “Ow!” Gilbert cried, fingers gingerly touching the sting. He looked over to have the branches shook in his face while being scolded by an older woman in a language still foreign to him. “I’m sorry ma’am,” A leaf brushed against his mouth as she continued to shake them. “Aluk! Can you please tell her...” Another whack. “I’m sorry!” _

_ Aluk held in a laugh, resting a gentle hand on his mother’s shoulder and began asking her to stop. She looked back at her son and spoke quickly, saying something that made Aluk smirk. “She said yes they are beautiful, but you are here to learn medicine.” Gilbert felt a flush creep up his neck and make its way to his cheeks. _

_ This brought a grin to her face as she let out a wry chuckle. The medicine woman then pointed in front of them to an empty stump that had four different herbs resting on it. She spoke quickly and then looked at him expectantly. Gilbert peered over her shoulder, silently pleading for a translation from Aluk. He let out a small chuckle and translated. “She wants you to name the four herbs in front of you and what purposes they serve to healing.” _

_ Gilbert nervously swallowed. He had never had an issue with tests before. Why should this one be any different? “Well,” he looked over the roots and herbs. He picked up a small red berry cluster, this one he could identify in his sleep. “This one is highbush cranberry, it’s good for ails of the bladder, bowels, and stomach. Best to be dried and powdered. However, can be consumed orally as food or in a tea.” Aluk translated, the older woman curtly nodded her approval before pointing to a cluster of purple flowers. _

_ "These are rosemary,” Gilbert smiled, remembering how Anne had commented on their beauty when he was explaining them to her at dinner a few nights prior. She stated that their name should be changed though, seeing as they were purple rather than the color of a rose. He was urged to continue as the medicine woman raised the leafs again. “Sorry, sorry, it helps with sore joints, spasms, and improves memory.” _

_ Aluk offered a gentle smile and nodded, pointing to the final two herbs on the stump. Gilbert knew the one with long oval leaves from their powerful aroma. It was a smell he knew well from whenever Mary would cook one of her signature recipes. “Sage. Used in cleansing rituals as well cuts, bruises, and minor colds. "The other one...” he glanced down at branch of vibrant green needles and bit his lip. “I’m not sure. I’m sorry.” _

_ His words were translated, the elderly woman shaking her head slightly and began speaking. Aluk nodded, responding briefly back before turning back to Gilbert. “She said needles can get confusing, but these are special and must be remembered.” She continued speaking, picking up the cluster of needles and dark blue berries. “It’s juniper. Hard to find if you don’t know where to look. Luckily, she said she likes you.” She offered a gentle smile and pointed behind him. Gilbert turned around and a little bit in the distance, close to where Anne and Ka’Kwet were off praising the sun, was a small grouping of bushes growing close to the ground next to a stunning, old oak. He had seen the tree often, always admiring its beauty but he never would have guessed that it was the bushes surrounding it that would be the truly special ones. _

_ “And what does it heal again?” he asked, his eyes not moving from the bushes. _

_ “Many different things,” Aluk responded. “Indigestion, sore lungs and throat, we have even had luck with it curing people with diseases you call pneumonia and consumption.” _

_ Gilbert’s eyes ripped from the tree, gazing at Aluk in disbelief. “Consumption? That’s impossible. Our medicine...” _

_ The old woman wagged a finger. “Not always right.” _

_ He cocked an eyebrow. “I’m sorry?” _

_ Aluk sucked in a deep breath. “What she means your medicine is good, but you have all been led to believe it is the only way to heal.” The elderly woman pressed the berries and needles into his hands and spoke in her native tongue. “She said the earth has provided means to keep our people alive for hundreds of years. The earth provides for all.” _

_ He had never considered it that way. In school and in his internships, he had been taught that medicine was always science, nothing more. But the idea that there was so much more out in the world that he could learn as long as he kept his mind open, the thought excited him. Gilbert wrapped his free hand around his mentor and smiled. “Thank you for everything you have taught me this past week. I will treasure it always.” She smiled before Aluk even had a chance to translate. His words didn’t need to be translated, the gratitude was radiating from his body. _

_ “Earth provides,” she spoke slowly. _

_ He nodded. “The earth provides.” _

\-----

“Come on boy,” he squeezed his legs tighter as Butterscotch cantered through the woods. Stray branches stung his face and arms, but he didn’t slow down and try to dodge them. Time was short. He could see the clearing a few feet ahead, the cliffs coming into view._ Almost there. _With a flick of the reigns, he urged the horse to move faster. “Little bit more Butterscotch, we’re almost there!”

Gilbert burst through the trees, one stray pine branch giving a farewell scratch along his leg as he brought a hand up to shield his eyes from the blinding sun. He pulled back on the reigns, encouraging the horse to slow its pace. A familiar sea breeze ruffled his mess of curls, almost as if it was welcoming him home after many months away. His mind drifted to the last time he had been there, desperate and broken after Anne had let him go off to Paris, when he caught sight of the old oak. A smile spread across his lips and he tugged his reigns to the left, dismounting and wrapping the leather straps around a sturdy branch. 

Pulling the empty flower sack and Jerry’s knife from the saddle and jogged over to the bushes. Taking a few sprigs in his hand, he breathed in their calming scent. “Hello old friends. It's been a while.” His voice was soft, much like Anne’s was whenever he heard her speaking with the kindred spirits within the forest. “I need your help. Anne needs you.” He unsheathed the knife and began expertly cutting through the thin branches, needles poking his hand as he slid them into his bag. _ A couple more, then back to Anne _. 

After he placed a few more branches into the sack, he tied the burlap shut and quickly made his way back to the horse. He untied the reigns, throwing them over Butterscotch’s lowered head as he grazed on the grass below. “Sorry bud,” he placed a foot in the stirrup and hoisted himself onto the saddle. “I need you to run a little bit more.” The horse snorted in understanding as Gilbert patted his neck. “Good boy.” He pulled the reins towards the woods, stopping only to glance back at the bushes that could be Anne’s saving grace. “Thank you.” He whispered, giving them a grateful smile before he squeezed his legs together and took off back towards the quickly darkening woods. 

\-----

_ Fweeet! _

Steam forced its way out the kettle spout, screaming for someone to come relieve the growing pressure. Gilbert grabbed the kettle, ignoring the slight burn he felt on his pinky through the thinnest portion of the towel and poured it into a large pewter cup, few needles escaping. He grunted in frustration and reached for a spoon to fish them out. 

“Di, can you clean this out and refill it?” he requested, pulling out most of the needles in one go. 

Diana nodded, her soft black curls tied tightly in a knot on top of her head. “Of course. Roy should be in with a second bucket of water soon.” She wiped a bead of sweat from her forehead, her sleeves rolled up past her elbows. 

“Good,” he said, still fishing for the final few needles. “You all should take a break for a bit. Don’t want to overheat her from all the steam.” Much to Gilbert’s frustration, a few stragglers remained floating in the water, no matter how hard he fought to get them. “I don’t have time for this.” He mumbled as he tossed the spoon aside and walked swiftly to the stairs, leaving Diana to plop into a kitchen chair.

Cole met him at the top of the stairs, a bucket of cool water in his hands. “Her breathing seems easier now, but her lips are still blue around the edges. She just fell asleep a few moments ago.” Cole wiped his runny nose with the back of his hand when his eyes drifted to the contents of the pewter cup. He frowned. “Are those pine needles?” 

“Juniper needles! I’ll explain later,” Gilbert pushed passed his friend, not trying to be rude but desperate to have Anne ingest the medicines. He pushed opened the door, steam pouring out in large puffs. He left it open just a crack to allow it to further filter out of the room.

Anne lay her head against Marillas chest, her eyes lightly shut and breathing heavy through her mouth. The tiniest amount of relief wash over him, she was breathing well enough that she could sleep. 

Marilla acknowledged him as he walked over to the bed and sat at their feet. “She fell asleep about ten minutes ago. Poor girl is beyond exhausted.” She ran her fingers around though her daughter’s hair, pulling stray strands from her soaked forehead and pressing them back on her head. “She did the breathing like you showed her. It caused her tremendous pain but she didn’t complain one bit.” She pressed a gentle kiss on the top of Anne’s head. “You’d have been proud of her,” Marilla whispered. 

He was proud. In fact he was so proud he wasn’t sure he could find the words for it. He couldn’t imagine the excruciating pain she must have been feeling in the beginning parts of the breathing treatment. Fighting against pus and mucus that was nesting in her chest...well, he had seen grown men lose hope because of it. 

Anne let out a large cough and her eyes slit open. “Gil...” she whispered in a raspy voice. 

“I’m here, Anne-girl.” He scooted closer to her, cup still firmly in his hands. “I brought something that will help you feel better. You think you could sit up a little more?” 

Anne nodded, reaching for Gilbert’s hand for assistance. He shared an unspoken agreement with Marilla, who pushed Anne forward while he pulled. She sat for a moment, her body swaying as if the mere act of sitting up had made her head spin. Gilbert kept a steady hand on her shoulder, hoping to help keep her upright but to no avail. Anne had eaten very little and moved even less in the last few days, her body was too weak to maintain itself upright. She leaned forward, collapsing into Gilbert’s chest with a soft thud. “Sorry...” 

“Don’t be Anne-girl, but I do need to get into a better position.” She nodded, her forehead moving his shirt with each movement. Gilbert pushed her forward slightly, making sure to keep her stable with one of his hands as he slid next to her on the bed. He looked to Marilla, hoping to not cause a stir but her focus was solely on her weakened child. “Alright, rest against me. You can put as much weight against me as you need,” Anne leaned into him, her shoulder digging into his upper abdomen but he didn’t have the heart to adjust her. She was fading and from the intense warmth radiating off of her, her fever would soon be reaching its peak. “Anne, I need you to drink this,” She reached a shaky hand towards the cup, trying to take it with her quiver fingers before they fell into his lap. 

Gilbert bit his lip, she was getting weaker with each passing moment. “Here,” he pressed the cup into her hand, his firmly wrapping around hers. “Lean your head back, we will do it together.” 

She lifted her chin, her head resting heavily on Gilbert’s chest as they together brought the cup to her lips. “Little sips, alright?” Together they tipped the cup slowly, Anne taking small sips while Gilbert kept a careful eye that no needles made their escape. She forced the liquid down her throat, each swallow sounding more painful than the last. After a sip that was too large, she began to stir into a coughing fit. Marilla bent forward, patting her back in hopes to assist the pus out. Anne coughed as she turned her face into Gilberts white shirt, launching one final cough of green and red mucus near the collar.

“I’m so sorry...” she whispered as tears dropped down her cheeks, her fingers trying to reach for the spot to wipe it away.

“Stop,” Gilbert wrapped his arm tighter around her, hoping she would learn that he could never be angry with her for something so trivial. “You have nothing to apologize for.” 

“I’m so tired Gil,” Anne mumbled aimlessly, her eyes looking around the room while her lids slowly shut. “So tired.”

“Little bit more,” Gilbert whispered, tilting the cup the tiniest bit. Anne ignored it, already beginning to slip away. “Come on, Carrots.” He waited for her eyes to shoot open, for her to become cross with him but her breathing began to slow. Gilbert shook her enough that her eyes fluttered. “Just one more sip Anne, please. And then you can sleep. Just one last sip.” His words came out in a plead.

Marilla watched the pair, fighting off tears as Anne opened her mouth to let Gilbert pour in the last bit of liquid. He smiled tightly as she forced it down, coughing one final time before she sunk deep into him, her fingers still holding tightly to the cup beneath his. “Good job, Anne-girl, good job,” he whispered into her sweat soaked hair when his eyes drifted to Marillas. 

“What did you give her?”

“Boiled juniper needles.” He placed the cup in the hand behind Anne, balancing her as he deposited it onto her nightstand. “It’s a traditional Mi'kmaq healing herb.” 

“Why didn’t we use this sooner?” she asked. Her voice was genuine, no anger or frustration in her tone, but instead curiosity. Still, he felt enormously embarrassed by his answer.

“I… I forgot,” he mumbled, looking down at Anne, her red curls had turned into wet clumps from sweat and were sticking to her neck and forehead. Her cheeks were the deepest shade of scarlet he had ever seen on a person and yet, somehow, he still thought she looked as radiant as ever. “I forgot a lot of important things,” he whispered more to himself than Marilla as he wiped a bead of sweat from Anne’s forehead.

Marilla continued staring at the pair. “Now what?” she questioned, allowing some edge to her tone.

“Well, her breathing seems better for now, so we should be able to stop the steam until she wakes up. Let her cool down and rest.” Gilbert slowly slid her off and laid her down into her stack of ever growing pillows. He pulled her hair from out behind her in hopes it would keep her neck cool. “Give everyone a chance to rest.”

She considered this. “Yes, rest would be good for all.” She looked back to Anne. “And she will be alright?”

Gilbert rolled up his sleeve, already beginning to boil after being in the room for only a few moments. “Well, it’s too soon…” Marilla glared at him. “What I mean is as long as we keep her fever controlled and on the lower end, then yes, she should be okay.”

“And then what?” 

He began running his fingers through the bottom of her hair, pulling out small tangles. “She will take time to recover...” 

“That isn’t what I mean Gilbert.” Marilla’s voice had gone completely cold. 

Gilberts hand stopped, his eyes travelling to the older women. “Marilla...” He started.

“Are you going to leave her again?” Marilla glared at him, her pointed hawk eyes staring into the depths of his soul. “Leave to let the rest of us pick up the pieces of the broken woman you left behind?” Her words were that of venom, her anger of his departure no longer able to be hidden behind politeness. “Because if that is your plan, to destroy her heart once more then perhaps she is better off...” her voice caught, a sob slipping through as she sat on the bed and rested a hand on Anne’s arm. 

He leaned over top of Anne, careful to not place any weight on her and grabbed Marilla’s hand. “Marilla… I am calling off my engagement.” Marilla’s mouth sat agape in shock of the news she had just been told. Gilbert licked his lips and looked over to Anne. There was no one out in the world for him other than Anne Shirley-Cuthbert and he had left her behind. How could one man make such a horrible mistake? “I was a fool. A selfish, ridiculous fool.” His voice was hoarse. Despite the words being directed towards Marilla, they were truly meant for himself. “The mistakes I have made. The hurt I have caused… I fear I will never be able to atone for them.” Gilbert glanced up to Marilla, who was swiping a stray tear from her eyes. “I am so sorry Marilla. So truly sorry for everything. I have done so many things wrong… I’m not sure if I will ever do anything right.” 

She flipped her hand over and held tight to his. “You have made mistakes, Gilbert Blythe. That much is for certain.” He dipped his chin, only for it to be immediately lifted by Marilla’s free hand. “But those made in the past cannot be changed. What is important now is how you grow and learn from those mistakes and how you can prepare for what is to come.”

Gilbert’s eyes burned, tears creating rivers down his cheeks. "I have hurt you all so much Marilla. I have been cruel to Bash, said horrible, heartless things to him. Oblivious to how all of you were feeling. You should all hate me..." 

Marilla rounded the bed, placing herself next to him and cupping his face firmly between both of her hands. "You listen here Gilbert Blythe, you push that thought right from your head.” He let out another sob, the tears continuing to pour as Marilla swiped them away with her thumbs. “Bash, Anne, Delphine, Hazel, Diana, Cole. We are your family and we support one another through the darkest of times. We pick each other up when we fall. You have helped us all up at some point or another when we could barely stand.” His lungs were hurting now, he wanted to wail but he fought back to not wake Anne. Marilla continued to stroke his cheeks, wiping every tear before it fell. “Now this time, it is us who have been waiting to pick you up." She wrapped her arms around him, holding him close to her and placed a gentle kiss on the top of his head. “And always know, my darling boy, that we will never stop loving you.” 

Gilbert’s entire body shook as he sobbed into her arms. She held him close and let him release every pent up feeling he had held in. Minutes ticked by slowly, the tears flowed but his sobbing ceased, for the tears were no longer out of sadness. Now they were from the relief he didn’t know he needed. Gilbert was home, truly finally home. 

\-----

That night, with Marillas approval, he was allowed to stay in Anne’s room to keep an eye on her. If it was any other situation, he was sure that she would have denied him without hesitation. But as they all sat around the table that evening, each exhausted from the long, stressful day, Anne awoke with such a wail, it would most likely give Gilbert nightmares for weeks. And the sight he saw when he entered Anne’s room, that would surely haunt him for the rest of his days. 

Anne flailed violently, the entire bed shaking under her. “Oh my God,” Diana, who had been following close behind with Roy and Cole, gasped and brought her hand over her mouth. Gilbert ran to the bed, immediately rolling Anne onto her side. As her eyes rolled back in her head, he began tracking the length of the seizure. _ One, two, three- _

“What’s happening?” Marilla wailed, running down the hall. She let out a loud cry, stumbling back into Cole’s outstretched arms. “What’s happening to her Gilbert?”

“She’s seizing!” He pulled a few pillows from under head, allowing her lay flat. _ Thirty-three, thirty-four. _

“Will it kill her?” Gilbert swallowed and tried to focus his attention on his counting. _ Forty, forty-o... _ “Will she die Gilbert!” Marilla screamed, Cole’s arms being the only thing to keep her upright. “You answer me right this moment!”

“_I don’t know _ !” He snapped, silencing the older woman. “Now everyone, shut up and let me count.” The only noise filling the room was the rattling of Anne’s bed as she continued shaking. _ Seventy-one, seventy-two, seventy… _ Anne’s body began to slow its movements, the seizure had come to its end. Her lids remained heavy, her breathing shallow. Everyone except Gilbert exhaled in unison when she let out a single cough.

“Her fever is rising. And if the seizure is any indication, it’s high.” Gilbert said.. “Diana, open the window.” Diana nodded, still in disbelief of what had just happened, and ran to lift the window pane. Gilbert threw Mary’s quilt off of Anne, causing her to shiver.

“What…” Anne whispered, her head rolling towards Gilbert.

“Anne-girl, you just had a seizure. Your fever is elevating and you need to cool down. I’m going to bring you over to the window.” Gilbert picked Anne up in his arms, not even pausing for a response. He carried her over to the window where he held her close enough that the cool September air could cool her. 

As the wind blew in through the window, her eyes opened wider but continued to shiver within his arms. “Don’t leave me Gil. Please don’t leave,” she sobbed quietly into his shirt, her words barely audible. 

“Never again,” Gilbert whispered, sliding down the wall so she lay in his lap. He held her close, allowing his body heat to help cease her chills. “Never again,” he repeated, pressing a soft kiss on her forehead. 

Marilla sobbed into Cole’s chest, his own terror clear on his face as Roy wrapped both of them in his arms. Diana appeared on the verge of passing out from a combination of exhaustion and fear. It wasn’t until he felt her go limp in his arms and her breathing steady did he bow his head and did something he hadn’t done since he had lost Mary. He prayed.

\-----

Soft, golden light was streaming through the window when Gilbert decided it was safe to move away from the cool air. Anne’s fever had lowered slightly in the night and he had decided it safe to wrap her in blankets for a few hours. When he went to rise, he noticed his backside was numb from sitting on the floor all evening and he legs felt like jelly. _ Sitting on a wood floor all night, not your best plan, Gil. _ He scolded himself, forcing both he and Anne up into a standing position, noticing for the first time just how little Anne was. _ She’s lost weight so quickly. _

Gilbert yawned as he adjusted her into a better position. His eyes were heavy, begging to close and run away from the world if only for a moment. He carefully stepped over a sleeping Diana, who had made a makeshift bed to stay close if help was needed, and placed Anne gently on the bed. 

He tucked the blankets tightly around her shivering body and stacked an additional pillow under her head. She let out a collection of coughs, none intense enough to wake her from her deep slumber. A familiar smell wafted through the door as Gilbert rubbed his eyes and demanded they remain open a little while longer.

“Coffee,” Gilbert whispered as he inhaled the scent. Anne stirred in the bed, almost as if she could sense that he was going to exit the room. In truth, he dreaded the thought of leaving her, especially after the promise he had made. But he had been awake for over twenty-four hours and had a feeling he wouldn’t be falling asleep anytime in the near future. He needed coffee. Anne would also be coming due for a breathing treatment as well as another round of medicine. “I’ll be back in a moment, Anne-girl,” he whispered close to her ear, pushing hair away from her eyes. 

He stepped over Diana, pausing for a moment to cover her with a blanket that had been kicked off during the night. “Thanks Di.” She snuggled the blanket close, mumbling something along the lines of thank you before drifting back off. 

The smell of coffee carried him down the hall, almost as if the magic scent was moving his body for him. Sounds of laughter and silverware clacked against china echoed up the steps. He took the first few steps when a familiar voice stopped him in his tracks.

“You mean to tell me that skinny little Blythe, who is like half of your size, did that to your face?” Gilberts stomach did a backflip as he took one additional step, peering around the wall to see a full table. Roy and Cole sat on the far end closest to the fire, while Marilla, who looked in desperate need of additional time in her bed, sat at the head with a wild Delly bouncing on her lap. Hazel scurried around the table, depositing freshly fried eggs onto every ones plates.

“I thoughts I had him at firsts.” Roy said, his cut lip now swollen to the size of a small stone. Hazel scooped the last of the eggs onto his plate. “Thanks yous, Miss Lacroixs.”

She nodded, her lips curled in a tight smile as she fought off a laugh and went to filling the coffee cups resting on the table. 

The man sitting with his back to the stairs let out a hearty laugh. “I’m gonna be honest, I’m impressed with him. So what did ya say about Queen Anne to earn that type of beating?” Hazel snapped a towel, the corner flicking hard against his neck. He brought a hand up to the sting. “_ Ow, _ what was that for Ma?” 

Hazel rolled her eyes, looking expectantly at him. “Honestly Sebastian Lacroix, that is not a discussion for the breakfast table.”

“Ah, so save it for lunch.” He couldn’t see Bash’s face but he knew that he was giving his signature grin, which earned a second, less serious eye roll from his mother. Gilbert smirked, feeling comfortable enough to take the rest of the steps. The sounds for forks scraping against plates ceased as the kitchen floor creaked beneath his feet. All members of the table, save one who couldn’t quite bring his eyes from the plate in front of him, stared at him.

Gilbert held up an awkward hand in greeting. “Mornin’.”

“Unsel Gilbur!” His niece rejoiced, leaping from Marillas lap and barreled over. 

He bent down, forgetting his exhaustion, and caught her when she jumped into his outstretched arms. He blew a gentle raspberry against her cheek, earning a tiny squeal in return. She grabbed hold of his cheeks, pushing his face away with a toothy grin before brushing her nose with his, their secret greeting. “Good morning, my angel.” 

She cast a glance over his shoulder, half expectanting another to come down behind him. “Where Auntie?”

Hazel’s eyes widened, as if her grandchild had just brought up a taboo subject. “Delphine,” she said sternly. 

Gilbert locked eyes with her and shook his head. Delphine Lacroix was a smart child, perhaps one of the smartest Gilbert had ever known. And she had a right to know what was going on with one of the most significant people in her life. _ Especially if Anne... _ He pushed the thought from his head and instead went to explaining in a way he felt wouldn’t cause the young girl much distress _ . _ “Angel, you know how at times your belly hurts or your throat feels scratchy?” She nodded her head. “Well, that means you’re sick. And Auntie,” he paused, finding himself struggling to speak. Delly’s doe eyes stared up at him, hanging from his every word. He swallowed the lump in his throat. “Auntie is sick, more sick than just a belly ache or a scratchy throat.” 

“Oh.” She considered his words before asking. “Ring Auntie treats?” Gilbert smiled, amazed that her young mind associated illness with receiving treats from Anne.

“Not right now, angel,” he spoke softly, hoping his niece would understand.

She contemplated his words again, this time shrugging her shoulders and pointed to the table. “Me hungry.” 

Gilbert chuckled softly. “Me hungry too. Let’s go eat.”

He carried her over to the table and dropped into a chair with her on his lap. Hazel brought over a plate of eggs, toast, and perfectly paired with a piping hot cup of coffee. “Thank you, Hazel.”

“Of course,” she said hesitantly. Gilbert buttered the slice toast and handed it to his niece, who began happily munching away on it as he reached for the coffee. He brought the black liquid to his lips and took a large sip. It was as thick as sludge and burned his tongue the moment it entered his mouth but he found himself not caring. After all the events from this weekend, he would drink dish water if it would keep him awake for a while longer. 

It was only after drinking half of the mug did he finally notice everyone’s eyes were silently trained on him, no one touching their food or making a peep. The only exception being Bash, who seemed rather enthralled with shoving his eggs off in different directions on his plate. _ Please look at me. _ Gilbert wished silently. _ Please Bash, just give me some sign that you don’t hate me. _

Cole was the first to break the awkward silence and asked the question that they all were holding on their tongues. “How is she?” 

Gilbert wiped his eyes and adjusted Delphine on his lap. “She had a few additional fits in the night. Each lasting at least sixty seconds.” He pinched the bridge of his nose. Why was the coffee taking so long to kick in? “Her fever thankfully broke enough for her to sleep.”

“That’s a good sign rights?” Roy asked. Gilbert finally caught a good look at the mans face and fought back a grimace at the large bruises and cuts.

“Yes and no.” Gilbert sighed. “It’s good that it went down, but it wasn’t going without a fight. I’m sure we haven’t seen the last of it. She also has started having her coughing fits again.” He took another sip of his coffee and looked across the table at Marilla, the bags under her eyes most likely a reflection of his own. “We should do another breathing treatment, keep her lungs clear.”

“Roy and I will be in charge of water, running it to and fro?” Cole asked.

“It would be appreciated.” Gilbert stabbed an egg in the middle. “Finish up your breakfast and then head out to get started.” He shoved the entire egg in his mouth, chewing thoroughly to not choke. “Hazel…”

“Swallow first.” She scolded. Gilbert forced the eggs down with a loud gulp, earning a giggle from Delly.

“Sorry,” he mumbled. “Could you please grab the herbs in that bag by the fireplace and begin boiling a kettle? Anne is due for medicine.” Hazel nodded curtly and went about her task.

“And what of me?” Marilla asked, her weary eyes constantly drifting up to the steps. Despite his insistence that she sleep last night, she was up almost hourly checking through a crack in the door to see how her daughter was doing. She tried to stay away, give him space to care for Anne but he would hear her soft sobs coming from just outside the door after a particularly bad coughing fit or seizure.

“You should rest, Mar...”

“As should you,” she snapped. Immediately she took a deep breath and regained her composure. “Just tell me what to do Gilbert.”

He shook his head, he could never win in an argument with Marilla even when he was well rested so what was the point of trying to on no sleep. “Water. She needs to drink. The last time she managed to get down any way from a cup was last afternoon. When we tried to give her some last night, she could barely swallow. So you’re going to need to...” he looked down at Delly, who was paying the conversation no mind as she fed the last bites of her toast to her doll. He still made an effort to keep his voice low so as not to frighten her. “Moisten a rag and put it in her mouth.” Marillas eyes widened. “I know, it sounds barbaric but she is burning from the inside. She needs to hydrate. If she doesn’t...” He let his voice trail off, knowing all those present in the room didn’t need to hear the ending for that sentence to understand it.. “And I’m going to…”

“You’re going to rest,” Bash interrupted, speaking for the first time since Gilbert had walked down the steps. Bash shoveled the last bits of his eggs into his mouth and walked his plate over to the sink. 

Gilbert tried to find words. “I have things I need to...” 

“Yes, like sleep.” Bash didn’t turn, instead his focus was on the water he began pumping into the sink. “You look like hell, Blythe. Worse than the time foreman made you shovel coal for twelve hours after you sang one too many songs.” He picked up his plate and began scrubbing it gently. “Maybe take time to bathe too, you’re starting to smell worse than a latrine after bean stew day. We can hold down the fort while you take care of yourself for an hour.”

“I can’t do that. I need to be there for her.”

Bash threw down the brush in the soapy water. “_Dammit Blythe, _ would you stop being so stubborn for once?!”

Stunned silence engulfed the room. The only sound came from the water rushing from the spout and the gentle popping from the fresh log Hazel had just placed in the fire. Even Delly seemed surprised by her fathers outburst, her doll slipping from her small fingers and landing on the floor. Bash exhaled slowly and picked the brush out of the basin and began scrubbing harder.

Marilla cleared her throat. “Well, we all have jobs,” She scooted her chair back and stood. “Best get to it, come along boys.” She began gathering plates, nudging Cole slightly when he didn’t move from his seat.

“Uh yeah. We better...” Cole rose, still staring between the two men.

“Gose. Wese betters gose.” Roy finished, half shoving Cole out the door. Marilla and Hazel shared a glance as Marilla took the kettle and poured its contents into the same cup Gilbert used yesterday. 

Hazel cleared her throat. “Uh Delphine,” Delly paused her futile attempts to reach for her doll and looked to her Grandmother. “How about we go and see how Mr. Baynard is doin’ out in the barn?” 

Delly shook her head, holding tight to Gilbert’s shirt. “Gilbur come.” 

“Delphine,” Hazel scolded. Delly responded by digging her head deep into her uncle's chest. “Delphine Mary Lacroix.” She shook her head, pushing her forehead hard against his sternum. 

The pain made Gilbert break his gaze. “Del, listen to Gram Gram please.” She shook her head again, her brown curls bouncing back and forth. He bit his lip, for once hating the stubbornness that she had inherited from him. A horse brayed from just beyond the window, an idea coming to him. 

“Hey angel,” Gilbert placed tender fingers under her chin, lifting so her glistening doe eyes were staring back at him. “Auntie Anne is sick, right?” She nodded her head slowly. “Then who is brushing Belle, Butterscotch, and Midnight? And making sure they’re getting their treats?” 

Delly’s eyes widened as she leapt off of her uncle's lap and bounded for the door. “Gram gram! Come! Horsies!” She threw open the door, slamming it hard against the wall and running through it.

“Del…_ Delphine! Wait for me child!” _ Hazel barrelled after her grandchild, the faintest traces of a smile forming on her lips.

Bash and Gilbert were the only two to remain, the bristles scraping against the porcelain being the only thing to break the silence between the pair. Gilbert stared at his brothers back, anxiety taking hold. _ What do I say to him? I need to apologize. I need to tell him how deeply sorry I.. _.

“If you’re finished with your plate, could you bring it to me?” Bash requested as he deposited the final breakfast plate onto the counter.

“Oh uh, yes,” Gilbert mumbled as he stood and brought the plate over. Bash didn’t look up focusing solely on pumping more water into the sink. Handing off the plate, Gilbert finally began to muster courage to speak. “Bash, I want to...”

“You remember when we first heard about Mary? That there was nothing that could be done for her?” Bash interrupted, scrubbing hard against the plate.

“Uh, yes, I do…” Gilbert replied, feeling the slightest bit confused. “But Bash I want…”

Bash ignored him. “I was so angry. Angry at God, angry at doc, angry at Elijah… angry at myself. I hated myself the most, thinking how could I let this happen to my love. I was supposed to provide for her, protect her.” Gilbert watching his hand press harder into the plate with every word. “And I felt… I felt like I couldn’t talk to anyone. No one could possibly understand my rage or my pain. I wanted to hide away from the world.” His hands ceased moving, his eyes drifting out the window. “And then you found me. And you told me you would be there for me. Always. So when I found out you would be gone...” Bash’s voice trailed off but Gilbert didn’t need him to finish, he understood now why he had been upset. It wasn’t because Bash would be taking on an additional load of work, it would be because he was losing one of the only remaining members of his family.

Gilbert stepped closer, reaching tentatively for his brothers shoulder. “Bash… I am so...”

Bash ignored him once again and began scrubbing the already pristine plate, his voice began to crack. “I thought to myself, he has no right to be angry at _ me _ . _ I _am the one that is being left behind. You were running off to go live your perfect life with a pretty little wife. Leaving behind me and Delphine and your home. And then I remembered why you came back.” His words came out hoarse as he placed the plate down to be dried. “The woman you love, really truly love, is sick. Dying maybe. Which made me think… that maybe you are feelin’ the same anger I felt.” Bash finally met looked Gilbert head on, his eyes beginning to red around the rims. “I was selfish. I hope...” 

Gilbert threw his arms around his brothers shoulders and squeezed as hard as he could. Bash’s breath quivered as he returned the hug, wrapping his arms so tightly around Gilberts chest that breathing became a challenge.

“I’m the one who is sorry, brother.” Gilbert mumbled into Bash’s shoulder. “I have been so oblivious to the world around me and focusing solely on my desires.” His voice broke as a sob was working it’s way up. “Mary...”

“Would be so proud of you.” Bash pulled away, grasping tightly to his brothers shoulders. 

Gilbert shook his head. “No she wouldn’t. She would be ashamed of the mess I made.”

Bash chuckled. “You have caused a right good mess, haven’t you?” Gilbert smirked as Bash patted his cheek. “No Blythe, she would be proud that you are learning from your mistakes. And through each one, you have found your way home. And more importantly,” he threw his chin over his shoulder to the stairs, “You made your way back to her.”

Gilbert knitted his eyebrows together. “How do you...” 

“I know that temper of yours only flares up when Anne is involved. And by the look of that rich boy’s face, I would say it exploded.” 

Gilbert touched his scabbed knuckles instinctively, his cheeks burning in embarrassment. “Yeah… may have gone a tad too far.”

“No kiddin’.” They exchanged knowing glances, immediately bursting in roars is hearty chuckles. He should feel guilty, knowing that Anne was upstairs struggling deeply, but he had to admit: the laughter felt good after days filled with fear and anger. It made it feel like old times, times before Paris and engagements. Before times of lossed loved ones. 

At the thought of Mary, Gilbert’s stomach dropped. There was one last aspect he needed forgiveness for. “Bash,” Gilbert said seriously. 

Bash stopped chuckling but a smile still played on his lips all the same. “Yes Blythe.” 

Gilbert inhaled nervously. “I need to let you know how deeply I regret the cruel words I said about you and Mary.” Bash’s smile faded, suddenly realize just how serious this conversation has turned. Gilbert continued, “I have never thought that those things about either of you. Or of your marriage. I know the love the two of you shared… it was something of pure magic.” Bash nodded slowly, digesting the words. Gilbert began to grow anxious at the silent response he was receiving. “I hope one day you can forgive me or I can find a way to atone for them.” 

Bash stopped nodding and rubbed his chin. “You finished?” Gilbert bit his lip and nodded. Bash grabbed hold of his brothers shoulder, readying to pull him into what Gilbert thought would be another hug and smiled softly. Gilbert smiled back, relief washing over him for the briefest of moments until he felt a fist plunged into his stomach. 

“Christ Bash,” he sputtered as he doubled over. He couldn't catch his breath and felt the beginnings of his breakfast wanting to make a reappearance. 

Bash smirked as helped his stumbling brother over to the sink, clapping him gently on the back. “It’s alright Blythe,” Gilbert spit into the sink as his mouth began to salivate. “Let it out.” Bash rubbed his back, a laugh laying in his tone. 

“A little...” More saliva in the sink. “Warning would have been ni...” He gagged, unable to hold down the entirety of his breakfast from falling into the sink. . 

“Ah! There we go!” Bash cheered, handing Gilbert the towel he has slung over his shoulder. “Good to know you can throw a punch better than you can take one.” 

Gilbert glared at his laughing brother as he swiped the towel from him.“Yeah. We even?” He asked as he wiped his mouth.

Bash smirked, holding out his hand. “For now.” Gilbert rolled his eyes and threw the vomit covered towel at Bash’s chest. He caught it before it hit him, mocking disgust before tossing it aside before holding his arms out to hug Gilbert. “Come here, Gilby Goo.” 

He happily accepted the hug, holding tight to Bash once more. “Love you Bash,” Gilbert whispered into his brother's shirt.

“Paris made you soft brother,” Bash said it jokingly but the tone of his voice was filled with an underlying tone of love. Gilbert understood that in his brothers own special way, that the insult was his own way of expressing his love for him. 

The kitchen door slammed open and they quickly pulled apart from the other just in time to see Delly skip into the kitchen, sights set directly on her father and uncle. She ran over to them, jumping up excitedly as she announced. “Papa, Gilbur! Pretty lady here!” 

Bash and Gilbert exchanges glances, knowing all too well that there was only one person Delly referred to as the “pretty lady”. 

“It is a pleasure to see you again, ma’am! Here, let me take those heavy cases for you.” Hazel said from the porch. 

A soft voice responded. “Oh, Miss Lacroix, you don’t need to-“

“Nonsense! You have travelled all this way, the least I can do is help you with your bags!” The screen door creaked open. 

“This should be fun.” Bash mumbled under his breath as he placed a gentle hand on his daughter’s shoulders.

“Well actually they’re for Gilbert…” Her voice was tender as she stepped over the threshold. Gilbert swallowed as his eyes glued immediately to the woman’s face, which glowed with a radiant smile and sparkling sapphire eyes. The dark shade of blue on her dress flattered each of her curves perfectly and should have left him breathless but it never did. When her eyes found Gilbert’s, her entire demeanor seemed to falter, the air of elegance turning into something much less. 

“It is so kind of you to bring Gilbert’s things.” Hazel busseled in the door behind Winnie, her tone still excites from the new company. “I’m sure he will appreciate… my lord Gilbert, are you feelin’ well?” Hazel questioned. 

Out of the corner of his eye, Gilbert saw Bash pointing to the corner of his mouth, indicating a stray egg that he had missed with the towel. Gilbert quickly swiped the back of his hand across his lips, wiping away any last traces of vomit and nodded. “Just ate too quickly this morning.” He said with an awkward laugh. 

“_ Anyway _ ,” Hazel said slowly, clearly unconvinced. “Miss Rose has arrived with your things,” Lifting a dark leather case. _ Yet another gift from your supposed in-laws _. Gilbert bit his lip at the thought as Hazel continued. “Where would you like to me to put them?” 

Words suddenly became foreign to him. He couldn’t find himself focus on any one word or person. Not with Winnie standing in the same room as him, giving him an expression he couldn’t clearly read. To him, deciding to break off the engagement has been easy, but now, seeing the woman whose heart he was going to break before the day was out...he felt like Bash has punched him in the gut for a second time. 

Bash looked between the young couple, sensing the tension. He cleared his throat and nudged Delly slightly to the side as he reached for the bag. “Here Ma, why don’t we leave Blythe’s suitcase here and then head back out to the barn? Give these two some time alone.”

Confusion crossed Hazel’s face until she looked between the young couple staring at one another. “Ah yes of course. Uh, here.” She handed her son the suitcase and awkwardly continued to look between the young couple. Bash tossed the bag back into Gilbert’s chest, which he caught blindly. He couldn’t seem to move his eyes away from Winnie as he still tried to figure out her expression. 

Delly shifted anxiously. “Me hungry!” She declared loudly. 

Hazel rolled her eyes. “I swear child, you are going to eat us all out of house and home!” It was meant to ease the tension that seemed to be ever growing but it fell short.

Bash smiled down at his daughter and picked her up. “Come along my sweets. Let’s let Uncle Gilby and Miss Rose have some space.” 

She crossed her arms and scolded her father. “Papa, Unsle Gilbur.” 

“Right right, Unsle Gilbur, not Gilby.” Bash laughed, stepping towards the door before giving a small nod to Winnie. “Always a pleasure, Winnie.”

Winifred finally broke her stare with Gilbert and offered a polite smile. “As you, Sebastian.” He smiled in return, shooting a glance over to Gilbert before carrying his daughter out the door to play outside.

Wisps of curls moved slightly as the door closed behind her and her gaze returned to Gilbert. “Hello,” she said, the corners of her mouth lifting as she addressed him for the first time.

“Hi,” was all Gilbert could squeak out, his leather bag being held tightly to his chest. Winifred bit her lip, both appearing to be lost for words once more. 

“I can make you something while I make Delly a snack Miss Rose!” Hazel blutteres out. Both sets of eyes travelled over to her in confusion as she laughed awkwardly. “Yes, that’s what I will do. I’ll make you something.” She immediately walked to the stove, grabbing pots and pans from the shelf above. “Eggs, toast?” 

“Oh, no thank you Miss Lacroix. I won’t...” She stopped herself. “I’m not hungry at the moment. Thank you kindly for the offer though.”

“Oh,” Hazels face fell. Her eyes scanned the room quickly before landing on a basket of fruit. “Well I uh, I will take Delphine her snack!” Grabbing a plump red apple from the bowl and shining on her apron. “Ah perfect. I uh, will leave you two be, then.” Her words fell upon deaf ears as she exited the kitchen.

Gilbert shifted his weight, wondering what to say to make this any easier on her. He just needed to muster some courage but none seemed like it would come. _ Just get it over with. It’s going to hurt her either way. _“Win...”

“You should go get changed.” She interrupted with urgency. 

Gilbert’s jaw sat slacked. “Uh…”

Winnie took a deep breath, her voice calmer and said, “Sorry, I just mean, perhaps you would like to change before we talk. You’re in the same clothes I saw you in on Saturday.” 

Gilbert bit the inside of his cheek, realizing she was correct. He desperately wanted to get out of the clothes that Anne had been coughing all over for days. Another realization dawned. It had only been a little over a day since he had last seen Winifred. And somehow, within that time frame, he had decided to break off the engagement and realized his true feelings for Anne. 

“I’ll, uh, be right back,” he mumbled, trying to not reveal his shock and clambered up the stairs. 

\------

Gilbert splashed water from the basin on his face before glancing back up at himself in the mirror. The man he was staring at was similar to the one he saw a few nights ago. His chestnut curls cling to his face and his eyes were beginning to red around the edges, but he looked older, like this weekend had aged him. Or perhaps it was simply the lack of sleep. He knew he should close his eyes for a short while but with the height of his anxiety, he knew that wouldn’t be possible. _ Okay Gilbert, you can do this. It is not good for either of you to drag this out any longer. _

He readied to head out the door, even went so far as grabbing the door knob before turning around and started pacing about Jerry’s room. “For Lord’s sake Gilbert,” he whispered quietly to himself. “You just need to get it over with.” _ After everything she’s done for you. Her family has done for you, you’re just going to break her heart. Two years you’ve been engaged! Two years! What kind of monster are you? _

Gilbert groaned, shaking his head and sending water flying about the room. He had to do this. It would be a cruel disservice to continue along with this engagement when he knew that he loved another. Winnie was a wonderful woman and she deserved someone that would give her his heart fully. “Alright, I can do this.” His voice shook, trying hard to find any small amount of courage. 

He caught a glance at himself in the mirror once more and straightened himself. “_ You have to do this _.” He said with more confidence. Turning towards the door and this time without hesitation, he took the knob and clicked the door open, entering the hallway. Anne’s door sat ajar, a soft voice flowing from its opening.

“_ When Dorothy stood in the doorway and looked around, she could see nothing but the great gray prairie on every side _ ,” he peered through the crack. Winnie sat in the chair next to Anne’s bed, an emerald book cracked open in her hands. Her voice was melodic as she read, not filled with the passion and vivacity that Anne would, but it was calming. “ _ Not a tree nor a house broke the broad sweep of flat country that reached to the edge of the sky in all directions. The sun had baked the plowed land... _”

He rapped his knuckles gently against the oak door, causing Winnie to jump and the book slipping from her fingers onto the floor. She looked at him, holding her hand to her chest. “Oh darling, you frightened me.” 

“You shouldn’t be here, Win,” he whispered, not out of cruelty but of concern.

Winifred rolled her eyes and bent to pick up the fallen book, closing it and placing it gently on Anne’s bedside table. “Honestly Gilbert, I work in a doctor’s practice. I’m not frightened by the sick.” She glanced to Anne, whose breathing quivered as she shook from her chills. Winnie pulled the quilt up just below Anne’s chin. “Besides, someone needed to sit with her. Diana, who looked almost as ghastly as you, needed to go eat and clean herself up. And Miss Cuthbert went to check on how the water boiling was coming along.” She reached into the water basin beside the bed, ringing out a cool rag before placing it on Anne’s burning forehead. “Not to mention, I am also someone who hasn't been awake for two days and don’t mind taking care of a friend while the rest of you rest for a moment.”

He wasn’t sure how to respond, so instead he let his eyes drift to the book. “That is the book you got for her in Paris, right?” He asked as he crossed the room and picked it up. _ The Wonderful Wizard of Oz _was written across the center in metallic gold lettering.

Winnie nodded, her eyes not quite meeting Gilberts. “I figured she would rather hear a story than anything I have to say.” 

Gilbert looked down and saw an expression that surprised him. Her features were not filled with anger or envy, but instead they looked calm and slightly sad. “Miss Cuthbert said she seized last evening,” she whispered sadly, her eyes not leaving Anne’s scarlet cheeks. 

“Yes,” he put the book down and bent over to adjust the rag on Anne’s forehead so water wouldn’t soak her hair. Slowly, he moved stray curls behind her ear before he went to wiping a stray droplet of water from her cheek. “She seems okay for now. Tired. But I’m expecting it to spike again soon.” He pulled away, realizing his hands lingered much too long. 

Winifred bit her lip. “Darling?” she said to grab his attention.

“Hmm?” 

“When Miss Cuthbert returns, will you walk with me? ” 

He breathed deeply, knowing that the minute he was alone with her, he would have to do the task he was dreading. “I shouldn’t stray too far from here…”

“Just a short one, only to the edge of Green Gables.” He pulled his stare from the sleeping woman and looked at the one standing across from him. Her eyes had begun to glisten. _ She knows. _ “Please.” 

_ Now's the time for you to be a man, Gilbert. _ “Okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Let's take a walk?"  
"Where?"  
"To see the Wizard!"
> 
> ha ha, I like to think I'm funny.


	11. Confessions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO MY PRETTIES. I am back, with another split chapter (because I enjoy getting carried away...sorry.). My apologies for the delay. Chapter 12 is very important and will be up in a few days:) Without further ado, enjoy!

Chapter 11: Confessions

“I truly appreciate you taking time away to join me for a walk. It is such a lovely morning, isn’t it?” Winnie said, finally breaking the molded silence that they had all too soon become accustomed to. Though he didn’t show it, the gratitude Gilbert felt towards her for her words was huge. The silence between the pair was almost deafening. He wanted to speak with her but every time he felt would be a good time to begin, he would be scared off by one of her gentle sighs as she enjoyed the remains of the morning sun. 

“Yes, it is.” Gilbert said awkwardly as they approached the white fence on the outer borders of Green Gables. Winnie arrived first, resting gentle hands atop the rail. He followed close behind as he ran nervous fingers through his mess of curls. “It’s, uh, good to see you, Win.”

Winnie peered at him from the corner of her eyes with an impish smirk. “Is it now?” 

Gilbert scrunched his eyebrows together as he took his place beside her. “Of course it is. Being in your company is always nice.” 

“Not as nice as others.” An ambivalent and wistful smile crossed her lips, her tone was filled with tiny hints of amusement. _ She knows. It’s time. _

“Win...” 

“When did you start wearing your hair without the pomade?” Winnie asked as she quickly faced him.

“Oh, uh, a few days ago I guess.” Gilbert answered slightly dumbfounded. She looked him up and down, examining him closely. Never liking to be observed and assessed, especially after he hadn’t washed his hair since Friday evening, he awkwardly brushed the tips of his fingers through the ever growing mess. 

She bit her lip, a playful smirk. “It looks nice, more comfortable. You should keep it like this.”

_ It was your idea in the first place _. Gilbert wanted to say as the annoyance bubbled in the pit of his stomach. But as she turned back, the nervousness quickly found its way back home. Rubbing the back of his neck, he found himself unable to pull his gaze from his feet. “Win...” 

“Don’t.” His eyes shot towards her profile. Sadness had found itself a spot in her voice but her smile remained all the same. “Not yet.” She closed her eyes, inhaling the sweet autumn air. “Please, just permit a few more minutes to enjoy your company before we reveal our hearts.” 

Gilbert glanced back to the house, anxious to return back to his chair in the upstairs bedroom, but he owed her one last moment before their worlds would come shattering apart. 

“Okay,” he whispered, clenching his jaw tightly as he sucked in a piece of his severely scabbed cheek between his teeth. Winnie wrapped her hands tight around the fence post and leaned back, closing her eyes to allow the late morning sun to warm her cheeks. Her steady breathing contradicted his own, feeling that he couldn’t fill his lungs to full capacity.

Humming elegant pitches, a familiar tune came from her lips. Gilbert remembered hearing it one late evening walk, Winnie commenting on how she loved the sound of the violin. They had been happy that early August evening. _ We were happy once, weren’t we, Win? _Gilbert thought, the melody of the soft song surprisingly bringing him comfort with the happy memories.

The song came to an end, Winifred slowly opening her eyes and whispered, “Darling.” He expected her to look at him after she said his pet name but it appeared she was speaking quietly to herself, almost as if she wanted to taste the words like a piece of hard tack candy. With a sigh, she straightened and gazed at Gilbert decisively. “I cannot marry you.” 

Gilbert swallowed nervously, her words not properly settling into his mind. “Win, I have a confession…” he was interrupted by a swift smack of realization. “Wait, did you just say you can’t marry me?”

“Precisely,” she said, smirking.

Despite his efforts to keep it firmly shut, his jaw unhinged. “You can’t... marry...what?” 

“I can’t marry you. You can’t marry me,” she said candidly. “Is that not what you have been wanting to say to me?” 

“Well yes, but...” he sputtered. 

Winnie nodded her head along with the words, the smallest smirk dancing on the corners of her lips. “Yes but… you didn’t want to offend me? Or hurt me in any way?” She cocked her eyebrow, mirroring an action he had given her so many times before. 

“But-I-well… yes, but…” Gilbert firmly shut his mouth as he realized proper sentences were not coming to him. His lips formed a tight line as Winnie fought off a smile, her cheeks slowly flushing. As the scarlett reached her ears, she realized a roaring fit of giggles, doubling over. He stared blankly at her, his confusion growing more and more apparent. 

As her laughter began to subside, she rested a hand on the fence for support as she pulled more air into her lungs. “Oh Gilbert, you’re such a gem.” She wiped a stray tear from her lids. “A sweet, oblivious gem. Anne’s most certainly going to have her hands full with you.”

Winnie’s words almost pushed him to the ground. “You knew?” he asked in disbelief. 

“I’ve always known,” Her smile dropping ever so slightly that to a stranger, it would appear she was still maintaining her happy aura. But to someone who has spent two years looking at her face, studying its expressions, he knew that the happiness was being overtaken by sadness. “Well, at least from when I first met Anne that is.” 

“How? I didn’t...”

A gentle hand patted his cheek. “Gilbert, you are one of the smartest individuals I have ever had the pleasure of knowing.” Winnie’s hand lingered, her words genuine and filled with love. “But to be completely honest, I have discovered that when it comes to life, you often overlook things.” 

Gilbert knew he should feel offended, but he knew that sadly, she was probably correct. All the events from the last four days that he thought he had known the answers to were proving to be quite the opposite. And this has been just one weekend, how many other things had he missed in life because he had been overlooking them? “But still, how did you know?”

Winnie sighed heavy, her gaze returning to the far woods. “How could I not know?” All happiness had left her voice, she no longer tried to keep the sadness hidden. “The way you speak of her, the light in your eyes whenever you are both in the room together. And the smile you give her, the one I have learned is only reserved for her.” A harsh laugh escaped her throat. “You even ran after her at the county fair the first time you met my family!” _ When Anne had messed up Mary’s cake recipe… oh how I had wanted to do anything to comfort her. But I didn’t. _Gilbert pulled his thoughts from Anne, Winnie deserved his full attention no matter how rueful her words made him. Her eyes never drifted from a single maple tree in the distance. “My parents questioned why you abandoned us, asking if it was a habit of yours to run off after a different girl. It was almost as if they could sense your desire for her then and there.” She dug her fingernails into the chipping wood. “I told them that you were comforting your dearest friend. That you are incredibly compassionate, that it would help you in your future endeavors in medicine.” 

She shook her head with a small smile. “They saw right through it, of course. I mean, how couldn’t they? We all saw the look in your eyes as you chased after her. A look of pure, unconditional love.” Her voice grew increasingly sorrowful with each word. Gilbert took a timid step forward, daring to close the distance between them. She allowed it, watching as he put his hands on the fence post next to hers. “To be frank, I believe the only one who didn’t know was you.” She finally looked to him, a sad sparkle in her eyes. 

“Winnie,” he said, daring to brush a finger across her hand, trying to think of anyway to comfort her hurt. “I am so sorry.” 

Winnie stared at his fingers caressing hers and whispered. “I’m not.” Gilbert stopped stroking her hand as she brought her glistening eyes to meet his. Her face seemed brighter than it had moments before. “Can I tell you a secret? And you promise to not speak a word of it to anyone?”

Gilbert wondered what secret she could possibly share with him, a man who has been courting her for the last two years while being in love with another woman. She looked adamant about sharing this particular secret with him though. And it was the least he could do for her would be to hold her secret. “Of course.”

Her entire face lit up as she leaned in, acting like there were others around to hear her whispers. “In truth, Gilbert Blythe, I have no desire to marry.” Out of revelation he had heard in the past weekend, this one surprised him the most.

“Not now?” he asked puzzled.

She smirked with a small shrug. “Not now, possibly not ever. It took me being engaged to realize that I’m not exactly interested in marriage.”

Gilbert’s heart fell into his feet as he leaned forward, pressing the palms of his hands firmly against his eyes. _ She... isn’t interested… in marriage. And yet, we remained engaged. I never even loved her. I was going to marry her… and neither of us loved one another! _The pounding returned to his head, steady like the beat of a drum. He wanted to cry, he wanted to scream. The stress was overwhelming him and he would soon be consumed by insanity if he didn’t find a way to relieve himself of it. Gilbert did the only thing he could possibly do to prevent him from falling into madness: he laughed. 

This laugh wasn’t his normal laugh. This one was more desperate, less soft and more along the lines of a cackle. Winifred’s smile fell as she watched the man double over, his cackles growing louder with each breath. She reached a tentative hand out, hoping to snap him back into reality. “Are you alright Gilbert?” 

“Am I...” he laughed harder, fighting to catch his breath. “Alright?! Lord, Win, I am bloody fantastic!” Gilbert wheezed, the laughter becoming hoarse. Slowly, he sat himself on the ground,Winnie keeping a worried eye locked. He tried to control his fit and calm himself but he couldn’t. The laughter had become manic and he didn’t know how to stop. “This weekend… has been full of unexpected... surprises! How could I not be alright? First I hear Anne is sick, possibly dying.”

“I see how that can be frustrating but…”

“_But _ that was just the beginning of all the events!” Gilbert looked up at her, his eyes almost as wild as his wind blown curls. “I come to discover Bash was angry at me for not coming home and we got into a huge fight. Then there was this deep hatred from Diana. Of course, now I know the reason for that is that I broke Anne’s heart.” His voice was getting caught in his laughter, his lungs hurt but he couldn’t stop talking.

“You know, she also broke my heart. Completely shattered it,” Gilbert said plainly. He wiped his mouth as spit kept flying from it.“But I figured, hey she must love this guy, be happy for her! _ And then _ I come to meet Roy, who was a complete twat when I first met him and he picks a huge fight.” 

“So that’s why your knuckles are scabbed,” Winnie said, hoping he would give pause but he kept his pace, words flowing in a fit of mania. 

“He insulted and degraded Anne! _He destroyed her daylilies!” _Winnie nodded along, listening intently. Gilbert paused for a moment, memories of yesterdays events returning.“Okay, well that was actually me, but he tripped me! But guess the best part Win. Go on. Guess.”

“I, uh, don’t know.”

“Anne isn’t actually marrying Roy! Well she was but not anymore,” he shook his head, his curls smacking hard against his forehead. “But that’s besides the point!” Gilbert looked to his ex fiancé, who remained standing as she stared at him with concern. “Now I come to find out that after two years, you have had no urge to marry, not just me but possibly anyone! _ And to top it all off, you didn’t even like the pomade that you suggested!? _ Why wouldn’t I be alright, for Christ’s sake?” 

Winnie smiled awkwardly as she swayed side to side, unsure of what else to do. _ Relax Gilbert. You’re scaring her. _ He forced his laughter to stop, instead trying to focus on his breathing by following the instructions he had given Anne the previous afternoon. _ In through your nose, out your mouth. Calm down. You’re beginning to sound crazy. This weekend may have made you crazy. In through your nose, out your mouth. _

Gilbert repeated the steps, listening to the world around him as he calmed. The happy whinnys coming from the barn followed by the sounds of Delly's thrilled giggles. _ Horses must be enjoying their treats. _ He leaned his head on the post his back was pressed up against, a solid stream of consciousness finally forming, one question sitting in the forefront. “Why did you say yes, Win?” 

“Why did you ask in the first place?” She snapped, her words coming out harsher than she intended. 

Gilbert took the words with grace, knowing he deserved to be scolded by someone. He closed his eyes, the sun relaxing him. “Because I was selfish. Naive. Stupid even.” Sighing heavily, he wondered if he would ever forgive himself for the last two years and all the hurt he caused those that he loved. “I proposed because I enjoyed your company. You are witty, smart, and absolutely stunning. And my foolish self considered that to be love.” His fingers came to his nose, pressing it hard in efforts to release the ever growing tension in his head. As much as he didn't want to confess the biggest reason for his proposal, he knew it needed to be said. “Also, you could give me Sorbonne, the thing I longed for more than anything in this world. A beautiful wife and the school of my dreams, it seemed like the perfect deal two years ago.” 

“And now?” There was no indication of anger in her voice much to his surprise. He slit his eyes, peering over to her. 

“I realize it wasn’t. For either of us.” 

Winnie nodded her head slowly, her lips pressed tightly together. She bent down next to him, for once not caring that her skirts would become mucked with mud and leaves. She held out her gloved hand gracefully. “Help me sit please.” 

Gilbert held tightly to her fingers as she found a dry patch of land that seemed clean enough and plopped next to him, showing the least amount of properness he has ever seen from her. She mimicked Gilbert, resting her own back against the post and raising her chin to the sky once more. “You know, I was rather selfish in this situation myself.” She spoke quietly, a soft breeze shaking her curls. 

He couldn’t help but stare in disbelief, unsure whether it be from her words or the fact she was currently sitting on the ground next to him. “How… how were you selfish?” 

“I knew your affections for Anne, yet I said nothing. I knew your desire to go to the Sorbonne and that it was perhaps the only reason for the engagement, yet again, I said nothing. I saw how unhappy you were with me, how the kisses meant nothing more than pure obligation, and yet, I never said anything at all.” 

Gilbert lifted his eyebrows in confusion. “I’m sorry I’m not understanding how that makes you selfish.”

Winnie glances sideways. “You don’t?” He shook his head, her smirk making a reappearance. “I never let you go Gilbert. I had so many reasons and opportunities to, but I didn’t. Because I knew you were a man of honor and that you wouldn’t leave after everything my family had done for you. Even though your affections lay elsewhere, I selfishly kept you for my own because you are a good man.”

“I’m not a good person, Win,” he whispered, staring down at his hands that were resting on his knees. “You say you’re the selfish one, and that may be true to some extent. But I’m not a good person. I was the one who put us in this situation in the first place. I used you for years, knowing that nothing felt right between us. I should have broken it off years ago.” 

She stared at him, waiting for him to see if he was going to continue but his head hung in shame. “I almost broke off the engagement in Paris, you know.” 

He dared a glance towards her, his eyes full of questions: “You did?” 

A small chuckle escaped. “Yes, I did.” She reaches up and pulled the pin from her hat, taking it from her head and placing it on her lap. “As I’ve stated, I knew where your heart lay from the beginning. I would see the two of you together and felt the electricity that would flow throughout the room. I half expected you to break things off with me at any moment.” Her fingers fidgeted with the silk ribbon along the brim of her hat. “So imagine my complete surprise when you showed up at my door, proposing marriage and declaring your love for me. It caught me so off guard that I first thought you were joking.” She laughed again genuinely, as if the memory amused her. “I presumed that you were genuine and despite my distaste for marriage, I was almost happy. A man I considered my only true friend decided to spend his life with me.” Gilbert felt the corners of his mouth lift at the thought. He had truly come to cherish her companionship, it was nice she reciprocated those feelings. “I figured that perhaps over the years, your affection for Anne would dwindle and our love for each other would have grown. That maybe we could even be happy together. But then, at the engagement party when my mother told us to kiss… I knew that wouldn’t be possible. I felt nothing. I knew you felt the same.” 

Gilbert remembered that kiss well, not because of how elated he felt but it had been his first. His father had always told him that when you kissed the other half of your soul, you would know. The feeling could make one burst with happiness and pleasure. So it was much to his surprise that when he kissed his fiancé and felt nothing more than the warmth of her lips pressed against his. His face must’ve shown the disgust he had felt because Winnie chuckled. 

“My sentiments exactly. Anyway, as the years passed us by and the more time you, Anne, and I spent together as friends, the more I saw that you were engaged to the wrong woman.” Another tender, genuine smile as she closed her eyes. “The two of you together, well that is magic unto itself.” Gilbert turned his attention to the house, half expecting to see Anne standing in her window smiling and waving to him. Only to be saddened upon realizing that she was still bedridden. 

Winifred didn’t seem to notice the lack of attention, her chin still lifted to the sky. “Father was oblivious to the whole thing of course. But mother sensed it instantly, told me I should forbid you from seeing her. Part of me knew she was right, that I shouldn’t allow the two of you to be together, especially not alone. But part of me knew I couldn’t separate you two. You needed one another, and frankly, I had grown quite fond of Anne’s company.” This pulled Gilbert’s gaze back to the blonde. 

“You liked spending time with Anne? Even knowing I…” he couldn’t bring himself to utter the word to Winnie. “Like her?” 

“Of course I liked spending time with her!” Winnie laughed as she turned back to him. “She is wonderful, intelligent, and her stories are by far one of the most entertaining parts of my parents’ boring parties. I had found another true friend in her.” Gilbert smiled with her, it made him a little relieved that through everything, Winnie had found a friend within Anne. “Which is why I allowed you to go on seeing her. But then everything changed when you went back to Avonlea for the final harvest before we left for Paris.” Her tone shifted back to one of sadness. “Every time you came back, you would share stories of Anne’s students, of a funny joke she said as you walked about the orchards in the evenings, or the new treat she had you try. Every word that left your lips was Anne. Always and only her.”

The guilt of his past actions began to weigh down heavily on him, as if somebody was physically stacking boulders on his chest. His headache was increasingly worse as all his thoughts began swirling like a tornado. Winnie continued on, oblivious to the pain he was feeling. 

“So when your acceptance finally came for the Sorbonne… a part of me almost felt relieved. I’m not sure why, perhaps I was a little jealous and didn’t even realize it. We would be able to be together without interruption. And we would be halfway around the world from_ her _.” Winnie sighed, staring out across the yard. “But still, every flower box, every smell or building would remind you of Anne of Avonlea.” 

“So when did you decide to break things off then?” He asked, his gaze following hers to the house. 

“Around early May,” she said plainly. “I had done my duty and helped provide you fulfill your dream. And I was thrilled I could help you with that. Once the decision came to me, I felt relieved, happy almost. I was counting the days until we would be on the train heading home and the pair of us could move on with our lives. Then,” she eyed the side of his head, knowing that what she was going to say was going to cause him more stress. “the end of May arrived and you received the letter informing of Anne’s engagement to Royal.” 

Gilbert’s heart ached, recalling the pain he had felt when he first opened the letter, seeing her words of love for someone else. It was as if someone had reached into his chest and ripped his heart out. He even threw up the entirety of his breakfast that morning and destroyed a brand new pair of pants. His face paled, his stomach churning at the memory. For once, he was grateful that Bash had punched him earlier.

Winnie eyed him, the tiniest amount of remorse hiding in her eyes. “I’m sorry, you have had such a difficult weekend and I suppose this isn’t helping any. I can stop if you would like.” 

Gilbert forced the pain away, he truly wanted her to finish, no matter how much it hurt him. “I’m alright, please continue.” 

Hesitantly she nodded, rubbing her hands together. “Well, after that letter came, I watched you break. Like, completely and utterly destroyed. You didn’t eat, barely spoke to anyone for weeks, and most nights, I could hear your walking about your bedroom waiting for a slumber that would never come.” He looked away, embarrassed that she had noticed how deeply Anne’s words had hurt him. “After I heard your quiet sobbing one late evening, I couldn’t stand it anymore. I knew I couldn’t bring any more pain into your life. So instead, I decided to make the best of situation. I decided to try harder in my affections for you, do anything to make you happy. It wasn’t much, but I tried my best to bring back some form of your happiness. Although, I was never quite sure that you noticed.”

“I noticed,” Gilbert said truthfully. He had noticed that in early June, Winnie’s personality shifted. She became highly affectionate, throwing propriety away as they walked hand in hand down the Seine. Whisking him away from parties with the elite and sneaking him off to a small bakery or library. She even began calling him darling then, a name he had come accustomed too in the last few months. In a dark moment of his life, his fiancé became his best friend. So much to the point, he began to force himself to share her affections, trying to return the love she was giving him. He reached over, resting his hand on top of hers. “I truly noticed. And I will forever be indebted to you for everything you have done for me, Win. You pulled me out of what I thought would be the darkest moment of my life. You do make me happy, Winifred Rose.” 

Winnie smiles softly, flipping her hand to give his a tight squeeze. “As you do me, my dear friend.” 

“Friend,” Gilbert repeated, liking the way the words tasted.

\---

“So what will you tell your parents?” he asked as they made their way back towards the house, Gilbert fearing he had been away for far too long already. 

Winnie matched his quick stride easily, her stamina being built by her life in the city. “Oh, they know. I told them yesterday that I was calling the engagement off.” 

Gilbert stopped mid step, almost stumbling to the ground. “You already told them?!”

She continued walking, her shoulders rising quickly as she giggled. “Of course!” 

He ran forward to catch up with her, their shoulders bumping into one another. “I’m sorry, Win. You shouldn’t have had to go through that alone.” 

She shrugged. “Father took it rather well all things considering. He said that as long as it was my decision and I was content with it, he would support me. Mother on the other hand…” She bit her lip, Gilbert suddenly becoming very anxious. Celia Rose was not a woman you wanted to be on the bad side of. “Well, mother wanted you blacklisted and barred from every practice throughout Canada.” Gilbert felt like he could faint, his knees wobbling beneath him. Winifred held up a hand to help him maintain his balance. “Don’t worry Gilbert, I quickly deterred her from that. Gave her another topic to fuss over.”

His knees stabilized as relief washed over him. “And what could possibly deter your mother from her epic war path?” 

“Well, how about her only daughter confessing her longing to go to medical school?” Gilbert stopped suddenly once more, only this time bringing Winnie along with him as he reached for her wrist gently. She didn’t meet his eyes as she turned, a flush arising on her neck.

“Win, you never told me you wanted to go back to school,” Gilbert said with a smile.

“It’s always been a desire to receive higher education. Of course, I went to university for the certification program in typing and secretarial work. My mother told me that becoming a secretary was even far too much education, that I should focus on my finishing if I wanted to find a good husband. I thought that is what was best and I pushed away the longing, that is until I met you and Anne.” Winnie finally looked up, her sapphire orbs meeting the moss of his. “You both rekindled the passion for schooling as I watched you study for your courses at Queens. The temptation grew when I would attend a seminar with you. Growing even further still when I would pick you up from your classes, quietly listening outside the door as final questions were being asked. It made me want to learn more, to be more than just your wife. And silently, I had hoped that one day you would have allowed me the privilege to do just that.”

“Oh Win,” he said, holding tightly to her shoulders. “You would’ve been allowed to do anything that your heart desired. You never needed my permission.” He smiled, feeling truly proud of his friend. “And I am excited that one day we will be working side by side together, not with you as my secretary but my equal.”

Winnie smiled, showing each of her gorgeous white teeth. “Thank you.” She brought a gloved hand up to his hand, resting it gently on top of it. “And Gilbert?” 

“Yes?”

“Don’t ever doubt that you’re a good man again. You are a little clueless at times but that doesn’t make you a bad person. In my eyes, you are one of the best men I have ever had the pleasure of knowing.” 

Gilbert nodded as he fought off the urge to sob. He had cried more this past weekend than he had in his entire life. Instead, he stared into Winnie’s eyes as he let a small smile crawl onto his lips. Even though he could never love her the way that he was expected, a new form of affection had appeared and not a day would pass by that he wouldn’t be grateful for Winnie.

They stared at each other, wind messing both of their curls and stinging their now scarlet cheeks. Winnie shivered as a particularly cold breeze drifted past.

“We should get back,” he said, taking wool plaid jacket off and wrapping it around Winifred's shoulders. She nodded in agreement, pulling his jacket tightly around her shoulders as they swiftly made their way back to the house.

\---

Closing in on the front porch of Green Gables, he saw Jerry tacking Belle onto the carriage. Jerry offered a small wave and a smile as they approached. “_ Bonjour _, Gilbert.” He tipped his hat towards Winnie. “Miss Rose, Miss Cuthbert said you would be needing a ride to the train station. We should heading off soon if you want to make it on time.”

She inhaled deeply, shrugging Gilbert’s jacket from her shoulders. “_ Merci _Jerry. I’m ready.” 

Gilbert took his jacket from her, looking between her and Jerry. “You’re leaving?” he asked, a little disappointment slipping into his voice.

Winnie bit her lip and turned to him. “I’m due on the eleven o’clock train. I didn’t think you would want me here when you tell her.”

“Tell her what?” Gilbert asked as he watched Jerry locked the back of the wagon as he felt a pair of judgmental eyes on him. He connected with Winnie and realization finally dawned upon him. “Oh, tell her_ that _.” 

A laugh escaped her lips as she rolled her eyes. When they landed on Gilbert’s serious expression, she clasped tightly to his hand. “It will be fine. She will be fine.” 

“But what if she’s not?” Gilbert’s voice was barely above a whisper as he stared down at his shoes. His faith in her healing was dwindling for the first time. And as much as he hated to admit it, he was nervous.

Winnie bit her lip and squeezed his hand tighter in hopes he would look at her. “She will be.” 

He couldn’t bring his head up, worrying thoughts making it heavy to lift. “Between the fever, her lungs, and now the seizures… she’s so exhausted.” 

“She will fight as long as she has the strength to.” Winnie said confidently. 

“Her strength is waning.” His heart began to beat as panic settled into it. _ Anne’s going to die. You can’t save her. Her strength and fight is gone. _

“Look at me,” Winnie said, frustrated with his downcast gaze. He tries to lift his head but found himself unable. She put two fingers under his chin, lifting it so he could look directly into her eyes. They had a ferocity behind them. “Anne is strong, a lot stronger than most. She will fight until her body forces her to stop.” He choked, the words being too painful to hear. Gilbert tried to look away but Winnie forced him to maintain eye contact with her. “And then, when she is too weak to fight, when the exhaustion is unbearable, you be there. You fight for her. Be her strength. Be her hope.”

Gilbert’s body shook uncontrollably, he felt faint. Winifred brought another hand up to steady him, holding him tightly at an arm's length and offered a tender smile. Only then, did the tears begin to fall. He was afraid, no terrified. He couldn’t lose Anne. If she ceased to exist in this world, he would lose a piece of his soul that he couldn’t afford to part with. “I’m so afraid, Win. I can’t lose her.” Tears created tiny ponds on the ground as they slid in waterfalls from his cheeks. 

“I know.” Winnie’s hands cupped his face, her white gloves immediately soaked . “Gilbert, listen to me.” He hiccuped, his sobbing was making his lungs hurt. Would he ever stop crying? Would the fear ever cease? Winnie brought his head to her shoulder, brushing his curls behind his ears. “Listen,” she cooed, her voice as if she were comforting a child. “You are allowed to be afraid. So long as she doesn’t see it.” He lifted his head, understanding what she was saying to him. 

“Because if I lose faith, then how can she keep it?” Gilbert whispered. 

Winnie nodded, her hand still sitting in his muss of curls. “So, don’t lose faith in her. Alright?”

Gilbert reciprocated the nod as he wiped the salt water from his eyes. “Thank you, Win. For everything.” 

Winifred smiled, reaching up on her toes and placing a gentle kiss on his cheek as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders. Shades of rose kissed his cheeks at the unexpected closeness of her. This hug, the kiss, and all of her words of comfort. They were the first time he genuinely felt any form of closeness to her. More so than any brush of their lips or hand holding that had happened over the last two years. This was the love of a true friend. 

Their embrace lasted a few more moments, and for once, he couldn’t find himself wanting to let her go. Gilbert felt as if this was the last time he would see his dear friend for a long time. She was the first to break the embrace, her eyes sparkling with clear liquid, with a bright smile plastered on her face. “We will see each other again, I can feel it.” 

“We will,” he said, swiping away a stray tear from her crystal eyes. “After all, I need to bid Mr. Bones farewell.”

Winnie lifted her eyebrows to her hairline in surprise. “Of course, can’t go breaking his heart without a good bye now can you?” Both of them were quiet for a moment before they burst into a fit of giggles. 

“Has anyone seen Gilbert!” A desperate voice called from within the house. The giggles ceased instantly, Gilbert's worry made another appearance. _ You've been gone too long. Somethings happened. She’s in trouble. _The screen door flew open so hard that it almost flew off the hinges. Roy pointed to him, his breath heavy. “There you are, Gil!” 

“Roy, what happened?” 

“I don’t know, she started flailing about, crying and pushing us all away.”

“Her fever. Shit,” Gilbert whispered. He shot a look to his ex fiancé. “Win...”

“Go,” Winifred said without hesitation. With firm hands behind his back, she pushed him up the porch stairs. “Go help her.” 

Gilbert looked back and nodded. “Thanks again, Win.” Without waiting for a response, he ran through the door and took the steps two at a time.

\---

Winifred stood on the ground, staring at the door, debating if she should go up and help when a throat cleared beside her. She turned, brown doe eyes staring nervously at her. “Ma’am, it’s ten-thirty. If you would like to make the train, we must be off.” 

“Yes, thank you Jerry.” She said with a polite smile. The young farmhand led her to the front of the wagon, assisting her as she climbed aboard. Taking his place beside her, he gave a quick flick of the reigns and the wagon began rumbling from the house. The last time she traveled through the white fence, she felt Gilbert’s eyes staring at the back of her head, waiting for her to wave a final goodbye. What she didn’t want him to see was the tears that had formed within her eyes. 

This time, she did turn around, not a single tear in sight as she whispered. “Good bye, my darling.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Actual conversation with bruadarxch:  
Me: "I HAVE TO COMPLETELY REARRANGE THIS CHAPTER!"  
B: "Uh meg, why?"  
Me: "I FORGOT THE HAIR GEL. HOW COULD I FORGET THE FREAKING HAIR GEL." *proceeds to freak out for a solid five minutes*.  
B: "Why don't you just stick it in as an offhand comment?"  
Me:*awkwardly stares into the camera like I'm in the office*


	12. Fight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back :) Chapter 13 is currently being drafted as well as bits of the epilogue. I am excited to share this last bit of the journey with you all! Thank you for your never ending support. Much love to each and every one of you xoxo

**Chapter 12: Fight**

“Ow! Get off!” Anne cried from the bed when Gilbert entered the room. Marilla and Diana sat on either side of her, trying to run cool rags along her body, as Cole fought to keep her from rolling off the bed. Her white cotton nightgown stuck to her body, her sweat soaking through the sheets and blankets that were furiously trying to be kicked off her. 

Anne’s shrill cries echoed off of the wooden floors, sending shivers down his spine. _ Her heart rate. Check her heart. _Gilbert rolled up his sleeves, taking large strides across the room. He reached for his bag, pulling out his stethoscope. Pushing Diana aside, he tried to speak calmly to hysterical woman. “Anne, I need to try and lie still! I need to listen to your heart!” Leaning forward, he tried to get close to her chest when a sharp fingernail slid across his cheek.

“Don’t touch me!” Anne growled. “Stay away from me!” 

His fingers nimbly touched his cheek, wiping away a drop of crimson liquid from the thin cut. It stung, but the pain was nothing compared to what he felt staring at Anne’s slender body roll around the bed. 

“Gilbert, are you alright?!” Marilla asked, her voice filling with fear. 

“I’m fine.” He said, wiping the speck on his clean pants. 

“Can’t you give her something?” Diana said as she leaned her full weight into Anne’s body so she wouldn’t harm anyone else. Gilbert peered over to his bag, thinking of the morphine he had brought with him. When he packed it, he prayed he wasn’t going to have to use it. It seemed that wasn’t going to be the case. 

Anne continued to fight as Cole swatted away a wild kick just as it was about to make contact with his jaw. “Gilbert, if you have something, do it!” 

Gilbert wasn’t sure why he was hesitant. Was it because he had seen people become addicted to it? Or the fact that he couldn’t bare to Force something on Anne without her permission. “I-I don't…” 

“She’s going to hurt someone!” Roy shouted as he ran to help Diana with holding Anne on the bed. 

“Or worse, herself!” Diana said, her words vibrating as she was being shaken. 

Inhaling deeply, Gilbert began to dig in his case. _ Where is it? Why is it whenever I need something I can’t… _

“Got it!” Gilbert yelled, grabbing the capped syringe beside it. He stared at the bottle for a moment as Anne let out another scream. _ Her heart will burst. Do it you coward. _He stuck the syringe into the cork and filled it with just enough to allow her some peace for a few hours. Flicking the glass with his fingers to release the air, he turned towards his frightened assistants. “I need you all to hold her still. Cole, Roy, take her waist and legs. Diana, her body. Marilla, her other arm.” 

Shifting into their positions, Anne’s eyes widened as everyone began to hold her down. “No! Go away! Away!” She screamed, her head now being the only portion of her body able to move. “Help me!”

_ Ignore her. This is for her own good. _Gilbert focused his attention on her left arm and wrapped a piece of rubber cord tightly around her arm. While searching for a vein, she cried for him. “Gil! Gil!” His eyes shot to hers, the fear overtaking her anger as tears streamed down her face. 

“I’m right here Anne. I’m right here.” Gilbert's voice cracked. The room began to spin, Gilbert’s attention being pulled every which way everyone's voices began overlapping one another. 

“Hurts! Stop!” 

“Do it Gilbert!” Cole and Roy yelled, their grips loosening.

“I can’t hold on much longer!” Diana struggled.

“Gil! Help me!” Anne sobbed.

A thin blue line surfaced and he quickly pricked the needle into her skin, catching the vein. “This will help you Anne-girl, I promise.” She howled as the thick, clear medicine into her body.

“Mama...papa...” her voice trailed off as the morphines powerful grip took hold. The groups hands lifted slowly from her body, each taking timid steps back and waiting for the young medical student to hopefully provide some answers. Gilbert pulled the needle from her arm, releasing the rubber cord, and set them on the table next to him, opting to set it down as far as possible from Anne’s reach.

Gilbert went to run his fingers through his hair when Cole pulled him away from his thoughts. “What the hell was that?” He looked up to see the strawberry blonde leaning against Roy for support. Diana and Marilla had joined one another, both sliding down to sit huddled on the floor.

“That…” He brought a cotton rag to where she was bleeding and pressed down to clot the vein. “Is what happens when someone’s fever is incredibly high.”

“First she can’t breathe, then the seizures, and now this?” Diana asked, the sadness obviously apparent as she stared at her sleeping bosom friend.

Gilbert sighed. “Most assume when a person gets sick that it’s the illness itself that kills them. In truth, I have seen more people die from fever than from the pneumonia itself.” He rubbed his eyes and glanced out the window, staring at the far fence where he had been talking and smiling with Winifred only a few moments prior.

“But I thought she spiked last night, with the seizures?” Roy questioned.

Pushing away the guilt of his happiness from before, he turned back to everyone’s terror. “I said it wasn’t going away without a fight. This is it fighting back” 

Every one watched on as he took his stethoscope from the floor and placed it into his ears before pressing the bell against Anne’s rising chest. The rattle in her lungs was still there but thankfully it sounded as if the mucus was loosening. _ Thank your mother for me Aluk _ he thought silently to himself. Four pairs of eyes burned into him, anxiously awaiting for what he was going to say. “Her lungs sound a little better. The breathing treatments and the juniper needles appear to be helping.” Gilbert threw the stethoscope back around his neck and pulled the chair that had somehow made its way across the room next to the bed. “Which means now we just need to focus on the fever.”

“So what do we do now?” Gilbert didn’t know who asked the question, nor did he care. He truly getting tired of being asked that when he knew he was running short on responses. Fevers were such a fickle topic in the world of medicine, and only now were doctors were beginning to research deeper into how to help cure diseases such as typhoid and pneumonia..

“We keep her hydrated.” Gilbert said plainly, eyes drifting towards Anne.

“And then what?” Roy asked for everyone.

“And then we wait.”

“We wait?” Diana asked confused.

“Yes. We wait.” Gilbert answered resting his elbows on the bed next to Anne’s arm. He laid his head down, hoping that the questions would momentarily cease because his answers, much like his courage, were slowly running out. 

———

Anne’s fidgeting grew worse as the sun began descending in the sky, every few hours waking in a fit of hysterical screaming. She would call for people who she had never met, reaching out for them and begging for their help. Begging for them to ease her pain and take it away. Begging for her Gil to save her while fearing the man who was standing next to her as he wipe her down with cold rags. Her eyes never looked to him, only staring at the ceiling and far corners of the room.

Others flitted in and out of the room, Marilla and Gilbert remaining constant as they tried to keep her as comfortable and cool as possible. Both held tightly to each of her hands as she slept, Marilla's head constantly bowed as she prayed to whoever would listen, begging them to let her daughter live and to ease the pain she was feeling. 

Gilbert sat silently, squeezing tightly to Anne’s bony fingers and pressing them to his lips every so often. Even though she wouldn’t acknowledge that her Gil was in the room, he wanted her to know that he wasn’t leaving. He was still there, keeping his promise.

As Hazel and Mrs. Lynde prepared supper in the kitchen, Anne awoke into a fit worse than any of the ones prior. Her body convulsed frantically, waking Gilbert just as he was beginning to doze off with a punch to the top of his head. Marilla received the worst of the abuse, Anne’s leg reached out and kicked her square in the chest, sending her tumbling back into the wall.

“Marilla!” Gilbert screamed as he stood to leap over the bed. 

“I’m...I’m...” she said through heavy breathes, clutching tightly to her surely bruised chest. “I’m fine, get the medicine!” 

Bash, Cole, and Roy tumbled in through the door, racing to help provide aid. 

“Roy, get Marilla out of here!” Gilbert yelled as he fiddled with the syringe and tried to get the last of the morphine from the bottle. He received no arguments, Roy rushing to Marilla’s side and pushing an arm underneath her to help her stand. quickly exited the room, Marilla wheezing as they walked away. Cole went to his designated spot, holding down Anne’s wild legs, earning a kick in his already swollen lip. He didn’t complain, it wasn’t the first time today he had been kicked and it was probably not the last.

Bash took his position and sat on the bed, leaning across her and grabbing her far arm.“Sorry about this Anne,” Bash said, leaning most of his body weight onto her chest. 

“Hurt! Stop!” Anne screamed, her head turning side to side, tying her hair further into knots. “Mary! Mary!” Bash’s eyes widened as he looked about the room, rising slightly from her chest. 

“It’s a hallucination!” Gilbert yelled as he tapped the glass for good measure. Bash ignored him, still looking about the room as he hoped to catch sight of a woman who wasn’t there. “Bash!” Bash snapped out of his trance, pulling his focus back to his brother. Gilbert understood his pain, the desire to see someone who was long gone. But right now, he needed his full attention on saving someone who was still breathing. “Please, Anne needs you now.” 

Bash nodded, leaning his weight back on Anne’s chest. She wailed as thick tears fell from her sapphire orbs. Gilbert sucked in a deep breath, pushing the needle into a fresh vein. The fit began to subside once again, her limbs went limp on the bed. Bash and Cole slowly stepped away, half anticipating that the fit would rev its wicked head. They only calmed when Gilbert removed the needle from her arm, setting it aside next to the unused rubber cording. 

He was about to fall into the seat, hoping to rid himself of this migraine when Anne turned her head slowly, meeting Gilbert’s eyes for the first time that day. She reached her fingers for his, trying to pull him near. He stepped closer, wrapping her hand tightly in his. “Thank...you...”

Gilbert watched as her eyes fluttered shut and her fingers go limp. His throat constricted, he couldn’t breathe and his heart was about to beat out of his chest. Most of all, he wanted to scream. _ You are allowed to be afraid. So long as she doesn’t see it. _

His legs moved by themselves, rushing him from the room and into the hallway, where his knees finally gave way. He fell onto them, shoving his head into his hands and let out a roaring scream followed by uncontrollable sobbing. Bash and Cole followed close behind him, stopping in the doorway at the sound of his wails. Diana and Roy, who were racing up the stairs to help, halted and stared down at the distraught man. 

He threw his head up, glaring at the ceiling. “_ You can’t have her! I won’t let you have her! _” Tears poured from his eyes, no one dared to move an inch. “You can’t have her.” He whimpered, his voice straining through the wails. 

Collapsing into himself, he curled himself into a ball with his back against the wall. He couldn’t stop the sobs, nor the tears. He couldn’t breath, his chest was being crushed. _ It hurts. Oh God, it hurts. I’m going to die, Anne’s going to die and I am going to die right along side of her. _

Bash reached forward, wanting to take his brother in his arms when a tiny voice called from the steps. “Unsel Gilbur?” 

Gilbert wanted to look at her but he couldn’t move his head. He was out of ideas. Out of pain medication. And above all, he couldn’t breathe. Why couldn’t he breathe? A small body shifted beside, dropping to lay down beside him and wrapping a tiny arm around his shoulders. Only when she squeezed him tightly did he finally begin to calm, his sobs ceasing. Lifting his head after a moment, he was greeted by a pair of the most beautiful chocolate eyes. There was no sadness behind them, no fear. Just adoration for the man she loved without conditions. “Are you okay?” She asked sweetly. 

“Yeah baby.” He lied, his voice hoarse from the sobbing. 

She pressed her lips together, immediately saw through him, much as she always had and would for the remainder of his life. “Lyin’ bad.” 

He sniffed, his lungs still hurt and snot dripping from his nose. “It is, angel. You’re right.” 

“You sad?” She questioned, wiping away a tear from his cheek. 

“Yeah Del, I’m sad.” Gilbert opted for honesty, knowing it was no use lying to her. “I’m afraid.” 

“Cause Auntie sick?” He nodded. Dellie, without any hesitation, smiled and kissed his nose. “Auntie get better. Promise.” 

Gilbert narrowed his eyes at her as he pushed himself onto his elbows. “What did you say?” 

Dellie sat up and looked to Anne’s room with a smile. “She get better.” Gilbert swallowed as he looked about the hallway. A stunned silence hung in the air, no one quite believing what they were hearing. 

“She get better.” Gilbert whispered as his eyes drifted to the crack in between Cole and Bash. Saying those three words, his chest began to expand and the weight that had been crushing them vanished “She’ll get better.” He repeated as one corner of his mouth lifted. Dellie gave him a toothy grin when he turned his head back to her. “Come here angel.” Dellie climbed onto her uncles lap and nuzzled her head into his chest. Gilbert squeezed her tightly, earning a sweet giggle in return. “You are right Miss Delphine Lacroix. She’s going to get better.” 

———-

When the sun began falling behind the far hills of Avonlea, those within the four walls of Green Gables were so exhausted that the house was near silent. Mostly everyone, with the exception of Delphine and Hazel, decided to stay down in the kitchen and parlor, waiting impatiently to see if they were needed. After much deliberation, Rachel had finally convinced Marilla that after the kick to her chest that she truly shouldn’t be sitting in the hard wooden chair for the entire evening and Anne would want her to be comfortable. Marilla eventually conceded, rubbing her surely bruised chest, and opted to stay in Jerry’s room so she could be closer to Anne if needed. The only one to remain within the four walls of Anne’s bedroom was an over exhausted Gilbert.

Anne’s fever remained elevated, her body fidgeting and shaking any time she tried to stir awake. Luckily, the last of the morphine was holding on longer than the others before it. Although, he wished he had more to give her, her quiet sobs as she slept indicating how much pain she was in._ Sleep through it Anne. Please. Just sleep through this last rough bought _. 

Gilbert pulled a fresh rag from the water bowl, parting her lips and ringing the water into her mouth. She shivered under the coolness but her lips would twitched in the corners, almost as if she was silently thanking him. Bringing the rag to her forehead, something twinkled in the corner of his eye. He turned to the bedside table to see the gold lettering shimmer in the fleeting light of day. _ Perhaps Winnie had the right idea to read to her. _

Right as Gilbert was reaching for the emerald bound novel, Anne’s finger twitched against his. His nervousness slowly returned, almost as if he was waiting for her to wake up and begin her thrashing but only her lips moved, uttering words of gibberish. 

“Katie, go. I don’t...go.” Anne whispered, a small amount of fear creeping into her tone. Gilbert adjusted in his chair, leaning his elbows against the bed. “Not ready. Go away.” Her voice became increasingly desperate, almost as if she willing away a dark force. “Go!” The fidgeting of her limbs was beginning, her hands and feet twitching.“Alone. Alone.” 

Gilbert slid his hands around her left hand. “Hey Carrots,” he said, his lips moving gently against her fingers. “You’re not alone.” 

Anne’s legs began to kick, not as violently as before but enough their quilt was shoved to the bottom of the bed. _ No no, not yet Anne. Sleep longer, come on. _“Mama! Papa!” Her voice begged. Gilbert squeezed her hand tighter, hoping to bring her back to some form of reality. “Don’t go! Alone!” 

Her eyes frantically moved about the room, searching for things he couldn’t even imagine. The convulsions continued violently as she called out for her mother and father, for Mary, even for someone named Katie. “Go away. Help. Go!” The words all sounded the same to Gilbert as they started to slur together. “Don’t leave! Alone!”

He shook, he was afraid. When would he stop being afraid? _ You fight for her. Be her strength. _ Winnie’s commands echoed through her head. “Be her strength,” Gilbert said as he willed his body stop shaking. He pushed the fear away, sending it straight into his toes, which tapped anxiously against the floor. _ Who cares, as long as she can’t see it. _

“Anne,” he scooted his chair closer, the smell of salty sweat stinging his nose as bent closer to her. “Anne-girl.” Gilbert called again, hoping he could become a beacon calling her home from the dark depths of her mind. “It’s Gil, your Gil. I’m here.” The quiver in his voice was prominent, but he wasn’t even sure if she could hear him. “You’re not alone Anne-girl. You used to be. But that was a long time ago.” Her eyes continued on their quest but as he spoke, her legs became less agitated. _ Be her hope. _

“I know before you arrived in Avonlea, you were alone and left to the solace of your imagination. You imagined all these fantastical places and people because you had no one.” He brushed a knotted curl away from her eyes, a little shock when she didn’t jerk away. “But then, a little over five years ago Anne-girl, you found us.” He smiled, thinking of that moment in the woods that he first met the fire queen that would hold his every ounce of his heart. “You had told me on many occasions that Avonlea was heaven on earth and Green Gables was your personal Eden. So much beauty, nature you almost didn’t need to escape.”

“Six years ago, Avonlea was a small-minded town, neighbors whispering behind one another’s back, everyone trying to be better than one another. And then, the Cuthberts sent for an orphan, a boy. And somehow, fate brought them the fire haired goddess of adventure. Slowly, she began to help people see that, perhaps there was more to life than the cheapest price on fertilizer”

Gilbert watched as Anne’s legs were shivered, not from a convulsion but instead a chill. Reaching down, he pulled the quilt to cover her. “You change people, Anne. You bring out the goodness in them that most didn’t know existed. I mean, Marilla was a feared woman, she terrified me as a child. And you helped her find joy again.” His eyes drifted to her treasures that had been strewn about the table. Spying a blue ribbon under Winnie’s book, knowing that it could only belong to one person, he picked it up and tied Anne’s matted hair off to the side. “Diana, who was destined to follow in the path her parents had laid out for her and marry whoever paid the highest price for her. You helped her find her voice and courage.”

Next, his fingers made their way to the old, yellowed sketch. “Your acceptance of people Anne, it’s remarkable really. Ka’kwet and her tribe, Cole, Bash... you saw them when society would happily shove them aside. And you didn’t ignore their differences, you embraced them.” 

Gilbert’s lip quivered, his wandering hands finding a small red dictionary. _ So you can beat me fair and square. _ “You...loved me, cared for me. Even after I shattered your heart and left to marry another, you still loved me.” 

“Go away! Go!” She mumbled, fear drenching her eyes with moist tears. The twitching in her legs began again, less volatile but enough to pull his eyes back to her. She thrashed, threatening to pull her hand from his grasp.

“No,” he said sternly, bringing his other hand to engulf hers so she couldn’t pull away. “Not this time Anne. I promised I wouldn’t leave you. Not now, not ever again. We’re in this fight together.” Words were mumbled under her breath, her eyes closing as exhaustion set in. Her body wouldn’t allow her the sleep she so desired. All her limbs throwing themselves, the only steady one belonging to the hand wrapped in Gilbert’s. “Fight a little bit longer, please. Just a little longer.” 

Her gaze locked onto the end of her bed, her limbs tensing.“Tired, Matthew. I’m so tired.”

“No,” Gilbert breathed out, reaching for the upper portion of Anne’s arm, trying to keep her here by sheer force.

_ “Seeing those who have left us when death is coming near is common Gilbert,” Doctor Ward said squeezing his young apprentice’s shoulder as both stared at a young mother calling to her deceased husband. “It’s just their way of fetching souls so they do not get lost on their way to Heaven.” _

“You can’t go Carrots!” Tears fell from his eyes, soaking her already sweaty arm. “You can’t go. Not yet. You’re not done here.” 

Gilbert's sobs were almost over taking his words but he fought through them. “You have young minds you need teach of the beauties of this cruel world. You need to publish your novel, your speeches.” He choked on his words, the weight returning to his chest. “You have so much of the world you need to see. So many beautiful sites that I want to show you.” 

Anne’s hand reached for the end of the bed, whispering Matthew’s name over and over again. “No.” Gilbert cried forcefully as he pushed her hand down. “We need to take walks in the orchards again, I need to show you the market streets of Trinidad and the beaches of South America. Together, we need to see the cathedral of Notre Dame and the masterpieces in the Louvre! Walk through the streets of London as you quote Shakespeare to me.” 

Gilbert’s mind swirled with everything he wanted to show and do with her- everything he should have been doing with her from the beginning. “Scotland. We need to go to Scotland. You… you need to dance under the stars in the fields of the Highlands. And... And find your family. Find who made you and where you came from.” He was squeezing her hand so tight that her fingers began to pale. But he was too afraid to let go.”I will get your there. I promise that someday I will take you everywhere in the world. I will do whatever you ask of me… You just need to fight.” 

His words fell on deaf ears but the words wouldn’t stop. He felt it was the only thing holding him together. “I want to kiss you. Lord, do I want to kiss you in every place I had ever desired to. The orchards, the Lake of Shining Waters, even at the schoolhouse.” A manic chuckle escaped his lips. “Do you remember when we were learning to dance for the county fair a few years ago?” His legs shook harder with every word, the floorboard rattling beneath his foot. “Of course you remember, you had to have felt it too. God, you have no idea how badly I wanted to wrap you in my arms and feel your soft lips against mine after we danced. I should have kissed you that day and I should have every day since.”

He sobbed, leaning his head into the bed and allowing tears to soak through the mattress. “I’m so sorry Carrots. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you that I have been drawn to you since the first moment I saw you in the woods. That I started having feelings for you when you smacked me across the face with your slate. It’s always been you, Anne. My Carrots, my Anne with an e.” His words were barely comprehensible and his throat was raw from the strain but he needed to say it all. If this could be the last time they were together on this earth, she had to know. 

Gilbert looked up, touching the knotted bottoms of her hair. “I have loved you from the first moment I met you, perhaps even before then. So live. Live so I can spend each day holding you in my arms and basking in the wonder that is you. I love you Anne Shirley-Cuthbert and I always will.”


	13. Fever Dream

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well guys, we made it... I made it. I have cried, laughed, and fought my husband (thank you dear for being my reference opponent) over this fic. And we are at the end. Through the dramatics of season 3, the heart breaking cancellation news, and travelling 1000's of miles between my home state and where we currently live, its finally done (well almost. Epilogue will be out soon, pinky promise). So everyone, enjoy this final, long, and incredibly complex chapter. Love to you all always, see you at the end.
> 
> Disclaimer: I apologize for any emotional distress.. but y'all know that by now. Grab you're tissues and popcorn.

**Chapter 13: Fever Dream**

“You know, the darkness of looming death is something no one has truly ever written about.” A young redheaded woman thought aloud as she twirled her thumbs as they rested against her stomach. “Most tomes usually speak of the large and glorious gates of Heaven.” She took a rogue curl in between her anxious hands as she fantasized about the beyond. 

“Scholars say that the gates are shades of pearl and opal, with a radiant warm light glowing behind them. And that you will immediately feel a warm sensation of comfort and joy wash over you as you see them.” Her fingers stopped, realizing she had spun the strand into a knot. With a sigh, she placed her hands back on her abdomen as they continued their twiddling. “But they conveniently neglect the fact before you begin your ascension into the great beyond, you must first have to sit and wait in this labyrinth of despair. You know, if I ever make it out of this realm, I will find the nearest piece of paper and write the truth and tell the world that waiting for death is nothing more than a dreary place with not a single companion” Anne raised her head to glance at the tree she had found solace with. “Well, except for you, my dear Sir Von.”

She had come to know that she wouldn’t receive a response from her new friend. That was one of the worst parts of being in this place, the silence was maddening. Every way she looked, there was nothing but the gray bark of peeling birch and ash trees, their branches sinking so low to the ground that they looked more along the lines of shrub. It didn’t surprise her though, they held out for the light of morning, only to become forlorn as they realized that the golden rays would never come.

However, the particular tree Anne had decided to take her leave against, seemed to be the only one that still remained hopeful that the battle could still be won. Sir Von, the bravest knight around, still held a single branch high into the air, as if he was brandishing his blade for all to see. Anne liked to think he was trying to rally his men, to tell them to hold on a little while longer. _ And perhaps _ \- Anne thought - _ he is trying to provide me with hope as well. _

The corners of Anne’s lips twitched, the tree did provide her with some hope. Her fingers lifted, touching one of the knights injured branches. Lightly, the injured branches tapped into one another as Anne dropped her hand and puffed out her cheeks, letting her lips vibrate as she exhaled. _ Dying should be more romatical than this. And definitely much less lonely. _

“I could try to call for someone again,” Anne said nonchalantly even though she knew it was a folly idea. She turned her head to the left, the pathway that she had been walking on for days stretched on as far as she could see. “I could return to where I came from I suppose. But we both know how well that has been going.” 

“Or,” She said as she turned her head the opposite way, completely unfazed when she saw more of the same dead trees and a path made of cracked, tawny cobblestone. “I can continue forward and hope that I one day come across a friendly face.” Her face contorted, puzzled. “Well, any face would be nice at the moment.” 

The last few days- _ at least she thinks it’s been days- _ she had been calling out any name she could think of, only to be continuously met with deafening silence. For awhile, it had disappointed her. When she had imagined death, she often assumed that she would be walking upon the fairy floss clouds and through an archway of immortal flowers and trees, where all lost loved ones would be waiting to greet her with a puffed sleeve, lace dress. They would call her Cordelia and her hair would finally transform into a lovely auburn or raven. 

Her parents would hold her close and tell her of her ancestry, that came from a long line of lords and ladies that lost their fortune in the years of famine. Mary would greet her with outstretched arms as the ran to the kitchen and she finally mastered the chocolate cake recipe. And most of all, Matthew would be there waiting to take her riding on her very own mare across the vast fields of wildflowers. 

Anne shook the thoughts away, they were causing her heart too much stress. Opting to no longer dwell on what could be, she decided to continue her search for another friendly face. Rising with a jump, she clapped her hands together as she balanced on gnarled roots. “If Marilla were here, I am for certain she would tell me, ‘enough wallowing and get on with it!’.” With a new found sense of determination, Anne grinned from ear to ear as she addressed her lone friend. “I should stop sulking and continue my search until I find someone else!” 

She went to wipe the dirt from her bunched turquoise skirt, only to discover that no leaves or dirt had rubbed off on her. “Well that is rather convenient, for now I can never be scolded for messing up my skirts!” Anne said gleefully as she looked to the knight standing before her as she placed a gentle hand upon its peeling armor. “Well Sir Von of the Dark Realm, I am ever so grateful for your ear as I took my rest. I will always remember your kindness as I go about my journey.” Bringing her lips to the tree, giving a small kiss before whispering, “I hope your battle is swift, my dear, sweet friend.” 

Pulling away, she found herself nervous as she stared out into the unknown,“This can’t be all,” she whispered softly, trying to convince herself even though she was certain it was a lie. “_ This can’t be all _.” Anne repeated with conviction. Almost immediately her hopeless task looked a little easier. Anne smiled, taking her layers of skirts in her hands. “Nothing is forever, right?”

\-----

Anne hated being wrong. She thought as she grew older, she would grow out of her competitiveness and would one day be okay with admitting on the rare occasion she was wrong. And sometimes she was alright with it. But as she trudged down the endless path, she was truly despising that she was wrong. 

“Nothing is forever? Ha!” Anne mumbled under her breath after the first hour - _ was it an hour? _ She had given up holding her skirts the second hour- _ hours or had it only been a few minutes? _ Around what she decided to be hour five, she started counting the cobblestone pieces she would step directly on, yelling each number. “ _ One hundred fifty two, one hundred fifty three, one hundred fifty four... _”

Little did she know, as she counted aloud, an ash tree with particularly wicked branches awaited her arrival. “_ One hundred fifty nine, one hundred…” _

The branch caught hold of her twisted hairstyle, causing her to yelp in surprise_ . “Ow!” _ Anne grabbed hold of the caught strand, giving it a tug only to watch it get tangled worse. “Oh, as if being stranded in the worst afterworld wasn’t bad enough,” she continued her struggle, listening as hair pins shook pinged to the ground. “I just _ had _to be held hostage.” 

The tree didn’t seem to be phased by her tongue. In fact, it seemed as if they wrapped a larger curl around their claws, increasing their hold on her. “Let go!” 

With a final fearsome tug, she managed to rip most of her curls free, but sent her crashing onto the freezing ground. Her fingers rose to just about her temple, rubbing the stinging spot that now lay bare. Copper curls swung from the branch, taunting her for her. 

“Marvelous.” She mumbled, rubbing her temple one final time before casting a venomous glare up to the tree. “You may keep those I suppose. But know this, evil Baron Than,” Anne said as she stood, brushing her hair over her shoulders to hide the barren spot. “I am only allowing you to keep it as a reminder that despite your best efforts, you were thwarted by me, Anne Shirley-Cuthbert!” Once more, the tree was unphased. 

Anne sighed, eyes traveling down to the ground that had become the home for roughly thirty hair pins. Slowly, she got down to her knees and began plucking them from the ground. “You know, you’re not the first tree to try and best me.” A wistful smile crosses her lips, the faintest smell of apples passing by her nose. “I was once in an apple orchard, and a dear friend of mine...” Anne’s voice trailed away as she had trouble recalling the rest of the memory. She remembered the apples, the sun slowly creeping to the horizon. The apple tree that was in its final days before bloom. A man with a boyish grin but that was as far as it went. After that, all her thoughts blurred before slowly blowing away like the seeds of a dandelion. 

“Curious,” she whispered, shoving the pins in a hidden pocket of her skirt as she rose. “Why are they…” A foreign sound interrupted her contemplation. 

For a moment, she felt as if the silence of this realm was driving her insane- _ that could still be the case- _but when she closes her eyes, concentrating as hard as she could, she heard it. From her left, the path that she had been putting behind her for what seemed like eternity, the sound came clear as day. 

_ Flap. Flap. Flap _. 

Her eyes shot open, her entire body shifting to face the noise. “Are those…” She paused, listening once again. 

_ Flap. Flap. Flap. _

“Wings?” The word came out as nothing more than a breath,fearing if she spoke any louder, she would be abandoned once more. 

However, instead of dissipating, the sound grew louder, as if it were approaching her. While she should be relieved that she wasn’t alone, something in the pit of her stomach urged her to turn away, to hide before the sound made its way any closer. But her legs wouldn't move. She narrowed her eyes, a black cloud quickly approaching her. _ No, not a cloud… _“Bats?” She said aloud, the swarm closing the distance at a much faster pace than she would have liked. 

Annes eyes took over her face as she finally got her legs to move as she took off in the opposite direction. It didn’t matter though, she had missed her window to escape. 

Within seconds, they were upon her. Their wings flapped hard, sending their tiny bodies into Anne’s. She held up her arms,guarding her face as a talon laced itself Into her hair. “Don’t touch me!” Her arms went wild, hands smacking away anything she could, one particular bar screeching as it took a large scrape from her finger nails. 

“Don’t touch me, go away!” The creatures ignored her cries, plucking away seams of her skirts. She felt like she was suffocating, her corset tightening itself as they closed in. “Stay away from me!” 

A bat bit her arm and she let out a desperate cry. “_ No! Go away! _” Her dress was in shreds, revealing her undergarments. She felt tears creep into her eyes and a sob in her throat. Why was this happening? Why wouldn’t they leave her alone? “Away!” 

Everytime she pushed one away, two more took their place, each one growing more violent than the one before. “Help me!” Her lungs screamed at her to stop yelling, to conserve the little amount of air they were pulling into them but her fear begged her to try and get ahold of someone..

“_ Any more dragons around here you need slaying?” _

Anne’s eyes opened as a familiar voice entered her ears, his face slowly taking mold. He was smirking at her, the same boyish grin that he had given her in the orchard memory. Instantly, his name flashed into her mind.

“Gil!” Anne wailed. “Gil!” Her only response was more claws to her face and arms. “It hurts!” The bats let out loud screeches that felt like they would make her eardrums burst. She constricted her arms tighter around her head, trying to drown out all the noise. “Stop!” 

If it were possible, Anne would’ve used her words to stop the very earth from turning if it meant that these beasts would leave her be. But the beasts continued to ignore her pleas, cutting deeper into her ribboned arms. Anne collapsed to the ground, the bats still tearing away at her but it didn’t matter. Her lungs felt like someone pouring liquid into them, waiting for them to overflow and not caring how much pain it put her through. Between that and the cutting of her arms, she begged her body to go numb or even give out all together. But most of all, she found herself begging to the one person whose face she could see clearly. 

“Gil...” she whimpered as her eyes glossed over with tears. “Help me.” 

As the words passed her lips, a mellow, incandescent light seeped in through the tiny openings of the bats. Anne couldn’t tell quite how bright the light was, but it was enough to scatter her attackers away from their mission. The crushing sensation in her lungs, as well as the excruciating pain that was on her tattered arms, seemed to ease as the light finally reached her. Despite all the previous pain she had been in, Anne found herself with a small smile on her face as the glow’s warmth reminded her of the first warm day of spring. 

Her moment of serenity was interrupted by a new set of flapping wings. She quickly tried to curl herself back into a defensive position but her body wouldn’t move faster than a slow creep. The wings closed in, even faster than the bats had flown. Anne squeezed her eyes shut as she prepared for the onslaught of talons and bites, only to be stunned when it never came. 

Only when a tree branch rustled about her head and the wings silenced did Anne dare to slit her eyes. On a hanging low branch, two alabaster doves stared back at her, cocking their heads as they observed her. 

“Hello there lovelies,” Anne whispered weakly. The doves cooed, their melodic song calming her anxieties, her eyes fluttering as they began to sing her to sleep. As her vision began to blur, two hazy shadows stepped from behind the tree where the doves resided. For some strange reason, she was unafraid of the new presences before, whether it be from her exhaustion or she had become too numb, she didn’t know. 

The smaller of the figures approached her first, reaching a hand towards Anne’s wounded arms and face. When she spoke, her voice was melodic, carrying a comforting tune that Anne had heard so many times in her dreams. “Well my sweet, you have certainly gotten yerself into a right good mess, haven’t ya?”

Anne tried to recall the face that matched the voice, but unlike Gil, none came. She tried to focus her vision as fingers softly brushed matted curls from her face but her lids were far too heavy. A second set of hands slid under her body, pulling her up into the air and pressed firmly against a solid chest. 

“Come on my flower,” the second voice said, this one lower but still just as soothing. He pressed his lips to the top of her head, a bushy mustache catching tendrils as he spoke. “Let’s get you out of here.” 

Somehow, despite her eyes being closed, she could see the images of her saviors clearly in her mind. “Mama...Papa...” her voice faded as the world around her fell into utter darkness.

\-----

_ She left her baby lying here, _

_ Lying here, lying here, _

_ She left her baby lying here _

_ To go and gather blaeberries. _

_ She saw the wee brown otter's track, _

_ Otter's track, otter's track ; _

_ She saw the wee brown otter's track, _

_ But she ne'er saw her baby! _

_ Ho-van, ho-van gorry o go... _

Anne sunk deeper into the lap she was laying on as delicate hand stroking her curls to the beat of the song. Her wool skirts and cotton blouse were soft against her skin, almost like a blanket. The bright sun warmed her to the bone as she spread her fingers against the soft grass that her back rested on. All around her, she heard the sounds of school children playing as rhythmic waves crashed against the shore line below her. “Hmm,” she hummed, bringing a hand to her eyes to rub the sleep from them. 

“Well well lass, it’s about time ye graced us with yer presence.” 

Annes eyes widened at the voice, shooting up so quickly she narrowly missed the woman’s noise. “Woah there flower!”

“Who’re you?” She jumped when she spoke, the voice that left her throat was foreign to her, brogue and deeper. But somehow, she knew it was her voice all the same. 

The woman laughed, distinct lines forming around her mouth as if she had smiled continuously every day of her life. Anne had always hated being laughed at, but this woman’s laugh held no malice within it, instead it was as warm as the sun that beamed above them. 

“Ye know, yer father said ye might not be feelin’ well.” She rolled her eyes, the smile still remaining as she thought about the memory. “‘Take her and all the younger students for some fresh air,’ he said. ‘I’ll sacrifice teaching’ the remainin’ courses of the older students’ he whispered as he locked himself like a martyr.” She let out another booming laugh. Anne couldn’t peel her eyes from the woman. Between the bouncing burnt orange curls, storm gray eyes, the heaps of freckles that covered the entirety of her body, Anne felt as if she were staring at a future version of herself. 

“Mama?” Anne whispered, her mouth falling open at the realization. 

Bertha Shirley frowned as she reached forward, brushing her daughters own curl away from her open mouth. “Of course I’m ya ma! Who else were ye expectin, bhobian?” Anne’s chin quivered, all color draining from her face. Her mother’s smile fell as she lifted the back of her hand to a stunned woman. “Are ya alright lass? Ye look as if ya seen a ghost.” 

Anne grabbed hold of the hand quickly and brought it to her cheek, holding it close to make sure it was real. Bertha knitted her eyebrows together, her confusion increasing when Anne lifted her free hand to the intricate twists atop her mother’s head. 

“Red...red hair,” Anne whispered under her breath as she let out a shocked laugh. Her mother continued staring at her silently, waiting for an explanation as to what was going on but she never received it as her daughter looked her up and down. She took in every inch of her mother, from her ink stained fingers and the small yet sturdy shape of her figure, to the peony blush that seemed to always remain. The aura surrounding her mother radiated comfort and warmth. In her mind, she knew that she had looked at this woman a million times before as she was raised in a house full of continuous laughter and love. But deep in her soul, it felt as if she was truly seeing her for the first time. “You're beautiful,” Anne croaked, finally finding words.

Bertha crinkled her nose, same as Anne did every time someone paid her a compliment, but still looked flattered all the same. “Oh my Anne, yer a good lass.” She brought her other hand up to Anne’s face, squishing her daughters cheeks together. “I love ye so.” 

Anne couldn’t contain herself as she threw herself forward, tackling her mother backwards onto a wool blanket. 

“Anne Shirley!” Bertha yelled through a fit of giggles as her daughter nuzzled into her. “What’s gotten into ye?” 

“Oh maw, I had the wurst dream,” Anne cried into her mother's chest. “You and paw, ye were dead.” Anne pulled away, her eyes glassed over as she spoke a mile a minute. “Gone. I was alone. And I was so afraid. And I was hurt. And...” her sobs cut her off and her mother pulled her close to her once more. 

“Shhh,” Bertha hushed her child, running her fingers through their matching curls. “Yer alright wee one. Maw is here. Yer safe.” 

Anne pulled away again, unable to stop her nervous words as they poured from her mouth. “But there was this horrid woman in this dark gray building. And a bully. And twins.”

“Twins?” Bertha questioned, a smile in her words.

“Yes! So many twins.” Anne shuddered at the thought as she continued. “They beat me, sent me away! I hated it. Oh, how I hated it. But then I got sent away again!” She stopped, trying to recall what she was going to say next as a distinct image formed in her head.

Her mother asked Anne, carefully paying attention to each word. “Sent where, my flower?”

“I was sent...”An image of an older man with the most beautiful brown mare pulling them down a walkway surrounded by blooming cherry trees. She was talking too much but the man didn’t mind, he seemed to enjoy her stories. They pulled up to their destination soon after, a white paneled house with green shingles as a woman with stone features came to greet them. 

“Anne?” Betha asked, reminding Anne that she was saying something. 

“A house,” Anne said casting a glance to the ground as more images reeled by. Flashes of her wearing an apron and humming with the old woman as they decorated an apple pie. A flash of her with the older man as he handed her a silver bracelet with a shimmering hat charm dangling from it. Another flash of her walking arm in arm with one of the most beautiful women she had ever seen, laughing as their matching lockets bounced against their chests. A separate image of her sitting in a house made of branches and moss, offering her pinky to a boy with strawberry hair. 

The final image stayed the longest, allowing her to see each and every detail. It looked to be Christmas morning, she began blowing out candles on the tree while she wore a stunning sky blue dress with puffed sleeves. Her hair was chopped close to her head, she was sure if it weren’t for the dress she would look like a boy. But those details weren’t as significant to her as the boy who assisted her in her task,who leaned in for the last candle in unison with her. Their eyes locked and held each other's gaze, the boy smirking at her. “Gilbert,” she whispered.

Bertha stared at her daughter as questions formed in her head. “Whose Gilbert?” 

“I think...” Anne said as she tried to pull the puzzle pieces together. More images swirled of the boy with curly hair. 

_ The boy, Gilbert, extended his hands as people cheered around them. “Should’ve added the e.” _

_ “Tragical romance and all?” he asked her questioningly. _

_ The pair of them are sitting under the stars on a porch in front of a tiny cottage. “Who would have thought, after all these years, we would make such a great T-E-A-M.” _

_ “Ask me to stay.” _

Anne stopped allowing the memories to come through. The last one, the look he was giving her, it made her stomach ache in remorse and sorrow. She shot a glance at her mother, realizing she never finished her though. “Ma, I think he is someone important.”

Bertha raised an eyebrow to her daughter, ready to question her sanity when a lanky man caught both of their attention. The man’s eyes lit up when he reached the top of the hill, casting a blinding smile.

“There are my two stoaters!” Walter Shirley said as he plopped himself down on the grass next to them, kissing the top of Bertha’s head before turning his attention to his daughter. “Anne, my sweet, yer awake!” Her father reached forward, lightly pinching her chin.

Anne wanted to stare at him, to push away the revolving memories in her head and focus on her family. But she couldn’t no matter how hard she tried. Continuous images of the same people, different memories repeated and yet the only name she could think of was Gilbert. Why was he so important? Why couldn’t she recall everyone else’s names? What was so significant about the house with the green roof?

“Berty, is she alright?” Walter asked curiously as he watched Anne try to process everything.

Bertha shook her head. “I’m not sure dear. Poor lass just woke and started goin’ off about some house and a boy.” 

“A boy?” Walter asked, his concerns growing.

Anne ignored her parents as they continued their conversation. _ A green roof, a farm… friends… family. _“Matthew... Marilla...” Her eyes turned into saucers as everything sorted itself right. 

“Green Gables! I was sent to Green Gables in Avonlea!” Anne smiled radiantly as she turned to her parents, who were now exchanging nervous glances.

“What are green gables?” her father asked genuinely, stroking his mustache.

“Not a what! A place!” She was ecstatic, as if she had just solved a difficult math equation. “Matthew and Marilla, they lived there you see, and they were so kind and they loved me!” Anne stood and began pacing around in excitement. “And there was my bosom friend Diana, and my dearest Cole. A man named Sebastian and his little girl Delphine, who lived with Gilbert.” She paused for a moment at the thought of the man whose name came first, shaking away all the butterflies in her stomach before continuing her traipsing. “I assume he is also a very dear friend. Oh mama, papa it was all so wonderful. It felt just like home!” 

Her words stopped in her tracks, comprehending what she had just said. _ It felt just like home. They loved me _ . “Green Gables is my home.” Anne whispered as a single tear slid down her cheek. “And this…” She adjusted herself so she could see her parents straight on. “This isn’t real. _ You _aren’t real.”

Her parents exchanged woeful glances, each turning back to her slowly with their own sets of tears forming. Bertha nodded her head slowly, confirming everything her daughter had just said. “We are not, my sweet babe.” 

Anne’s knees went limp, almost falling face first into the ground when Walter rushed forward to catch her. She burrowed into his lap, wishing she had never made the discovery. 

Her father stroked her hair, whispering to her gently. “Yer fevers right high, my bhobian.”

“My fever…” Anne‘s voice strained as she fought a sob. She pulled her head away from her father’s grasp, looking between both of her parents. “I’m sick?” Their expressions were grim, as if it were more serious than a common flu. “I…” her brogue accent slowly was diminishing, returning to her regular tone. “I’m dying, aren’t I?” 

Another side eyed glance between her parents was all the answer she needed. Anne felt the world around her slowly begin to wist away, like dust being blown from an old text. Green was being replaced with drab graphite hues, blossoms with wilting trees. _ The dark realm. _She remembered quietly to herself, fear striking down to her soul. 

She shot a panicked glance at her parents. “I don’t want to go back there.” Her voice was raspy, tiny sobs breaking through as she pleaded towards her mother. “Please don’t make me go back.” 

Bertha caressed her daughters cheek, the tears in her eyes creating rivers on her face. “I’m so sorry, my flower. Yer pa and I can’t stop that, only ye can do that.” 

Anne’s eyes widened once more with hope. “What do you mean? I could stay here if I willed it?” 

Her mother bit her lip, looking over Anne’s shoulder to her husband. Walter took lead, putting fingers under his daughters chin and pulling her gaze to him. “Not exactly. Like yer ma said, this…” he gestured to the collapsing world, “is all just a beautiful dream you created in that brilliant mind of yours.”

“Oh,” Anne’s eyes fell to the ground, which still held the plaid gray blanket and warm blades of grass despite everything else almost being gone. 

It was Bertha’s turn to lift her daughters downcast gaze, making their matching sapphire orbs to lock. “That don't mean that if ye did pass, it wouldn’t take you to some enchanted realm just like this.”

Anne considered that for a moment, was she truly ready to take that leap of faith? To let the vile disease consume her body and let her escape into a happier world? “Do I get a choice? To decide whether I want to live or...” She couldn’t bring herself to speak the ending of the sentence but her parents knew what she meant all the same.

“The choice is entirely up to ye, mo chridhe,” Walter said smoothly.

“I can choose,” she whispered, her accent completely gone. “I can choose whether I want to live or die...” 

Her parents offered gentle nods. She thought of the world she was just sitting in, the sounds of her students running freely through fields as her mother sang to her. Her father helping her plan lessons while they discussed the latest novel they had read. The utter joy she could feel as she had an eternity to get to know the family she had lost before she even had the chance to properly remember them. 

The choice should be simple, but the nagging knowledge that this was only a dream made her hesitate. That if she did die, it could be nothing like this. It could be more of the world she had so desperately been trying to flee previously. 

_ Gilbert. Marilla. Diana. Cole _ . Their names passed through her head as if they were played over a gramophone on repeat. _ Gilbert. Marilla. Diana. Cole _. Over and over again, reminding her that if she died, she would be missed. She would hurt people that she loved and that loved her in return. 

Her eyes darted between her parents again, their expressions neither sad nor happy, in hopes they wouldn’t sway the decision either way. 

“I...” _ Gilbert. Marilla. Diana. Cole _ . “I don’t...” _ Gilbert _. Her heart ached as the recording ended on the name of the messy haired boy. She longed to see his face again, this time with her own two eyes. She wanted to play with his curls, pressing down one in particular that always seemed to rebel against the rest. She wanted to feel his rough hands against hers as he taught her how to fish, something he had promised to do for the last few years. She longed to feel his pale pink lips kissing her, even though it would probably never come to be. She wanted to be in a vast field with him, laying on a blanket side by side, looking up at the stars and naming constellations together. She wanted to... 

“I have to go.” Annes voice came out determined, the smile appearing once again. Walter and Bertha shared a final glance, this one dripping with pride. 

“Good lass,” Walter said, swiping a tear from his lids. 

Anne stood, her father following suit before reaching a hand to help his wife. the three of them stood staring at one another, their happiness quickly slipping into sorrow.

“I wish we could have more time together.” Anne said finally. 

“Someday, we will have all the time in the world,” Bertha said. 

“Just not today, my flower,” Walter finished for his wife. Both her parents reached forward with their free hands, which Anne happily accepted. The warmth radiating from the pair, the love that only parents could offer gave Anne a large dose of courage. They pulled her close, engulfing her face in kisses as tears streamed down all their faces. 

“I lov...” pain swelled in Anne’s chest, her heart beating rapidly, dropping her to the ground in horrific screams. Her eyes closed wishing it would stop. “Mama...” she whimpered, hoping her mother could take the pain away. 

Anne pressed her palms hard into the ground, hoping she could channel the pain elsewhere but instead of warm, freshly cut grass between her fingers, they were turned to ice as they touched the frigid cobblestone path. Her eyes flew open as she lifted her head to scan her surroundings.. “No...” 

She was back, the world around her boring and sullen.Her warm woolen skirts had transformed back into the tattered remains of the turquoise gown, her hair tattered and frayed. 

Still, she held onto the tiniest amount of hope that her parents were there, waiting behind the tree line. “Papa? Mama?” 

Piercing silence was all she received. Her parents had left her for a second time in her short life. 

“Someday,” Anne whispered, her voice echoing endlessly. She looked to her right, a familiar friend greeting her. “Hello Sir Von, I see that you’re still on your quest for the treasure beam.” She awaited a response, but her hopeful friend remained silent. Not a ruffle of his empty branches or a quiet whisper. 

Anne scrunched her forehead. “Is everything alright, good sir?” 

A twig snapped behind her. She spun quickly, hoping to catch a glance of who had made the sound. But there was only black behind the weary troops. The perpetrator had fled as quickly as he had arrived. Anne allowed herself a breath when another snapped, this one even closer to her.. 

“Who’s there?” Anne yelled into the trees. Another loud snap, this one behind Sir Von. Just as she was about to turn; to confront her tormentor, when an icy chill shot down her spine. She knew that she should flee, to scream but her legs remained firmly planted in ground as a husky, ferocious voice whispered.

“_Woof, woof _.” 

Anne stopped breathing, she wasn’t sure for how long but the severe pain in her lungs forced air back into themselves with a gasp as long, malicious fingers grabbed hold of her shoulder. 

“Well hello there,” the man said, his lips so close to her she could feel the words reverberate against her eardrums. He got even closer still, his voice dropping just above a whisper. “Little dog.”

“It’s just a dream.” Anne squeezes her eyes shut as she quietly says the words under her breath. “It’s just a…” she let out a small yelp as his fingers dug into her shoulder so tightly that bruises quickly formed. 

“Turn and face me when you speak to me.” He spun her so fast her head rattled, forcing her eyes to open so she wouldn’t lose her balance. It took them a moment to catch up with her body, the world around her spinning but She didn’t need to see clearly to know who the villain was before her.

“Billy...” 

The back of his hand struck her cheek. “Don’t say my name, you little d...” 

Instinctively Anne’s foot lifted, kicked Billy in between his legs. She didn't have time to be disappointed that she missed by a fraction of an inch because he doubled over all the same, releasing her from his grasp.

Anne took the opportunity she had provided for herself and ran as fast as she could. A few moments later, she heard the devil scream at her, demanding her to come back. But she kept her eyes forward, running faster than Belle in an open field. He was sure to gain on her relatively easily, his legs were almost double the length of her own, but she sure as hell didn’t want to make it easy for him.

She pumped her legs harder and harder, her boots echoing loudly against the stone. _ Where am I going? Why am I running from him? This is just a dream, he can’t hurt me _. The thoughts didn’t make her feel any better as memories of the swarming bats crossed her mind. The way their talons carved into her skin or the way they closed in so tightly on her, she felt as if she were drowning. They may not have hurt her in the real world, but she had still felt the pain all the same. 

Billy’s loud footfall created a louder echo than Anne’s, warning her that he was closing the distance between the two of them. Her lungs were on fire at this point, she was fighting to catch her breath but she continued her pace as she said a silent prayer. _ Somebody. Please help me. _

“Too bad Gilly boy isn’t here to save you!” Billy shouted from a few feet away. Anne ignored the ache in her heart at the mention of the boy who had helped her before even learning her name as Billy continued taunting her. “You pathetic orphans have to stick together after all!”

All throughout the chase, Anne had been trying her hardest to keep her eyes forward and focused, when suddenly something flashed by in the corner of her vision. It was a quick streak of chestnut and it appeared to be running alongside her behind the drab tree line.

_What was that?_ The streak seemed to slow, its long legs making delicate work on the protruding limbs of the trees. _Is that_ _a deer? _Her eyes shifted for only a fraction of a second but it proved to be a grave mistake. A piece of cracked stone stood straight up, catching her foot and sending her crashing forward onto her hands. Immediately they began to sting, her first few layers of skin peeling away from them as tiny droplets of blood seeped out. “Ow,” She mumbled as she momentarily forgot why she had been running.

She was soon reminded when claws wrapped around her arm, yanking her up and pushing her back into a tree. When she saw Billy’s face clearly, he wore the same smug grin that a lion would give as they toyed with their prey.

“Too damn predictable,” He said with a sneer. “All I have to do is mention Gilbert and you go all weak in the knees!” Anne tried to wiggle her way free, but it was no use, he was much stronger than she was and he knew it. She thought if she could lift her leg, she could kick him again but he seemed to have caught on to her plan as he pressed his knee into her thigh. His impish smile turned cruel as he pressed her body harder into the tree. “It really is sad for you though. I mean, he actually made you think that you were worthy of being loved and then _ bam!” _ He smacked the tree next to her head, causing her to flinch. “He left you for another woman, who is not only rich but more attractive than you could ever dream of being.” 

Anne could feel as splinters scrapped up and down her back and the pressure that he was placing against her leg was making it go numb. She had never been one to beg, but in that moment, she wanted nothing more for him to leave her be. “Please… please stop this” 

“Oh Anne,” Billy feigned sympathy so well that it almost convinced Anne that he would let her go. But when his lips curled into a vicious sneer, Anne’s heart fell. In one swift movement, he ripped her from the tree and threw her to the ground. “You can’t stop this… Gilbert can’t stop this…” He took menacing steps towards her as she tried to scoot away, only to have her hands slip against the slick stone. “You’re going to d...”

_ Ping! _

The sound of cast iron resounded off of Billy’s skull as his eyes crossed and started falling straight into Anne. She managed to scoot quick enough, sending him face first onto the hard stone, where he vanished into wisps of smoke.

“Good lord that boy never knows when to mind his business.” 

If Anne hadn’t been in shock from seeing her school bully disappear before her eyes, she would have recognized the voice sooner. It wasn’t until she slowly turned her head towards her saviour, a petite woman that gave off the aura of a lioness, did she realize who it was. 

The woman's hair sat atop her head, her dark curls pulled into a tight bun while her sleeves were rolled up just above the elbow. The smells of sage and paprika wafted into Anne’s nose, bringing her back to the afternoons she spent in the Blythe-Lacroix kitchen where she had felt nothing but joy and happiness as she cooked along side...“Mary?” 

A pair of chocolate eyes smiled down to her, the same eyes she had come to associate with her niece. “Hello An...”

“Mary!”Anne launched herself from the ground, all of her pain disappearing as she threw herself into Mary’s unsuspecting embrace. 

Mary’s surprise only lasted a moment as she dropped the frying pan and wrapped her arms tightly around the sobbing woman. 

“It's nice to see you too,” she whispered as she rested her chin on top of Anne’s head. As Anne cried, She tried to soothe her by running her fingers through Anne’s copper curls but would get caught frequently on a knot.

“Oh sweetheart,” Mary sighed as she grabbed Anne’s face, pushing her away so she could get a better look at the young woman. It wasn’t just Anne’s hair Mary hadn’t noticed was a mess. The young woman’s face was as red as a cherry and snot dropped from her nose, her arms caked with dried blood. “Look at you, you’re a mess!” 

Anne snorted, pulling up the remnants of snot that wanted to escape her nose. “You wouldn’t believe the tragical journey I have had Mary.” She said as Mary wiped her eyes clear of tears. 

“Why don’t you tell me about it while we sit?” 

Mary began guiding her to the tree line, where Anne thought she had meant for them to sit underneath one of the ash trees but was pleasantly surprised when Mary guided her over the wicked roots. She felt her eyes grow as a separate path began building itself in front of them, this one of fresh oak planks and railings. The railings covered themselves in honeysuckle vines as they walked by while blooming wisteria trees appeared overhead.

“Wow,” Anne said in an audible gasp as white gazebo awaited them at the end of the path. It's green shingled roof catching rain that Anne didn’t know was falling around them. “How… how did you do this?”

Mary giggled, pulling her into the gazebo filled with overstuffed couches and the most marvelous tea table. “I didn’t do this.” She said mischievously as she guided Anne over to a vanity that closely resembled the one back in her bedroom in Green Gables. “You did.” 

“I did?” Anne questioned as Mary gestured for her to sit in front of the mirror. 

“Of course you did,” Mary said, reaching past Anne’s shoulder to grab a comb and started tugging away at the knots. “You’re the one dreaming, dear, remember?”

Anne flushed at herself in the mirror, feeling embarrassed she had forgotten she was only in a dream yet again. “Right.” 

Mary smirked, holding a knot the size of a walnut in between her fingers. “Good Lord child, how did you manage to get yourself so tangled?” 

“Well, truth be told it wasn’t entirely my fault,” Anne explained as Mary began ripping away at the knot, causing Anne to wince. 

“Sorry, some of these knots are gonna need a firm hand,” she grunted, finally loosening the knot enough to get the comb through. 

Anne forced away a second grimace, not wanting to make Mary feel bad when she was just helping her. “It is alright. This is nothing compared to the pain I received from the swarm of vile bats.” 

Mary puckered her lips as if Anne had said something that had intrigued her. She met Anne’s eyes in the mirror, pausing her combing adventure. “You imagined bats, did ya?”

“I imagined?” Anne said sourly. “No no, I couldn’t have ever imagined something so repugnant and evil.” She shook her head, the whole thing confusing her. 

“Eyes forward please,” Mary mumbled as she pressed her fingers against the young woman's temple and pushed it back toward the mirror, which caused Anne to feel embarrassed once more. 

“Sorry,” she mumbled, staring at herself as Mary worked out the last of the knots. Anne tried to push the thoughts away, only to have more questions creep in. Her curious mind was a fatal flaw of hers, but there was just so much she didn’t understand.

“I just truly don’t see how any of this is possible. I mean, I can understand imagining you. My parents.” Mary hummed, listening as Anne lay her questions bare. “But why the forest? The pathway? And why, oh why, the disgusting and treacherous Billy Andrews?!” Anne shook her head again, this time so hard it ripped the comb from Mary’s hand and sent it flying across the room. 

Mary put her hands on her hips. “Anne Shirley, do you want your hair fixed or not?” 

Anne bit her lip, slowly turning back towards the mirror as she mumbled out another small, “Sorry.” 

Mary smirked and crossed the room to retrieve the comb. In the reflection, Anne noticed something she hadn’t before about Mary. Around her hand, there was a cloth bandage, much like the one she had worn in the final days of her life. Anne bit her lip as she observed Mary making her back over to her.

“This whole thing just seems rather superfluous, don’t you think?” Anne asked as Mary returned her delicate fingers to the knots. 

“You tell me.” Mary said plainly, putting the comb down and reaching for the brush. 

Anne Watched as Mary ran the brush through, curls returning to their bouncy selves._ Why couldn’t I fix them myself? _ “Since this is all a dream, I should be able to control everything right?” she thought aloud. 

“Probably.” 

“So then why do I find myself wandering in a forest of death and wickedness, attacked by various creatures, with my dress in tatters and hair looking worse than a swallows nest?” Mary started humming again, which frustrated Anne slightly. _ She’s allowing you to figure this out on your own. _

Anne continues speaking her thoughts aloud, hoping that by hearing them, she could piece together what to do. 

“The strange part of it all is that so far, after every attack, I am saved by someone who is already dead…” She paused, waiting for Mary to react but she appeared unfazed as she began separating strands to twist into a braid. Anne shrugged and finished her thought. 

“And for a brief moment, I am happy, safe.” The thought warmed her inside for a moment before a shiver pushed it away. “Then I get thrown back into the realm of darkness, where my only kind companion is Sir Von, and then the same thing happens all over again.” 

“Fevers do strange things to the mind,” Mary said, tying off the braid with a pale blue ribbon and tossing it over Anne’s shoulder. “There. All done.” 

She touched the braid, reveling in how one small part of her was normal in this bizarre dream. “Thank you Mary.” 

Mary offered a motherly smile, giving Anne’s shoulders a tight squeeze. “Now, how about some tea? I imagine you’re parched after your thrilling adventure.” Without waiting for a response, she walked over to the tea table and began setting our cups and small plates of treats for the pair of them.

Anne wanted to feel relaxed, to know that for the moment she would be allowed a brief reprieve. But one more glance in the mirror, she was reminded of her scratched face and ribboned arms. They didn’t hurt as much as before but it still brought a thought to the forefront of her mind. 

She stood, turning to Mary as she finished their place settings. “Mary?” 

“Hmm?” She cooed as she poured a fragrant fruit tea into cups beautifully painted with white daisies. 

“If I can control this dream,” Anne’s voice came out smaller than she intended, but part of her dreaded the answer she was probably going to receive. “Then why can’t I make the pain go away?” 

Mary stopped pouring as her expression saddened for the first time.. “You know the answer to that, Anne.” 

“It’s because of what is happening to me out in the real world…” she responded slowly, holding onto a sliver of hope that she was wrong. But when Mary didn’t stop her, a lump in her throat began to form. “I know I’m really sick....” Mary nodded slowly, placing the kettle in the center of the table. Anne’s breathing began to quicken. “My parents lied… I don’t have a choice…” she couldn’t catch her breath. “I’m going to die and I can’t stop it!” Her hand came up to her chest, she felt like she was going to start hyperventilating when Mary crossed the room in two large steps, gripping tightly to her arms.

“You do have a choice Anne,” Mary said sternly. “It just all depends on how much you’re willing to fight for it.” 

“How can I fight something I can’t see?” Anne whispered, her shoulders hunching over. 

“You’re a smart girl, Anne.” Mary said, holding Anne tighter so she would straighten and look at her in the eyes. “If anyone can figure it out, it would be you.” 

Anne smiled as Mary tapped her index finger against her freckled nose, something Delphine had done a hundred times to her before. At the thought of her niece, something occurred to her. In the recent months, Dellie had slept over at Green Gables a fair deal. 

_ “She’s been suffering somethin’ terrible with her nightmares and Ma and I haven’t slept in days because of the screaming,” _Bash had said to her moments before Anne offered to take in the young girl a couple nights a month. Dellie would often wake up screaming and writhing in pain from these terrors, claiming the monster would hurt her. And up until that point, her Uncle would run next door and grab her, fighting off any of the creatures who tried to harm her further. Gilbert was the only one she seemed to want in those horrible moments, turning away Hazel and her father with large dew drop tears.

_ “Don’t worry Bash, I know a thing or two about fighting off those pesky monsters.” Anne picked up her niece and they rubbed noses. “We will do it together, right Del?” _

“The monsters,” Anne said under her breath. “Billy, the bats, the forest...that’s my pain! That’s what I have to fight against!” 

Mary’s lips spread, a beaming smile emerging. “There you go.” Anne’s grin stretched from ear to ear, she was relieved to have placed another piece of this over complicated puzzle. 

“Now,” Mary said, opening up her arms and presenting the tea table. “Why don’t you come sit with me and relax before you have to brace yourself for another fight.” 

Anne obliged, following closely behind her friend. Mary sat with her back to the outer portion of the gazebo, allowing Anne to watch as random scenes scrolled along just outside. One moment it showed Big Ben, chiming the stroke of noon as merchants emerged from their shops to peddle to the lunch crowd. The next moment, it was the sandy shores of the Caribbean islands as crystal waves crashed into it while seagulls flying overhead. 

Mary snapped her fingers in front of Anne’s eyes, snapping her attention away from the magic window. “You might want to drink that before it gets cold.”

“Yes, you’re right,” Anne said, taking the daisy lined cup in her hand and taking a large sip. While it tasted lovely, it didn’t quite seem to quench her thirst, more like she was only receiving tiny droplets as they slid down her throat slowly. She eyed the kettle, wondering if there was any left that she could have when the image changed behind Mary again. 

As it came into focus, the smell of freshly baked bread drifted past her nose. The streets in the image were lined with patisseries and clothing shops, the metal wonder known as the Eiffel Tower peeked over the top of them as if it were trying to say hello. But none of those things caught her eye. Instead, a man and woman were exiting one of the dress shops that pulled her attention. The woman’s honey curls were pinned intricately into a low bun, framing her face to make her look almost angelic. She glided as she walked, her ardent laughter spreading to the gentleman that held her arm. Anne went green with envy, not because of the woman’s ethereal beauty, but because the gentleman hanging off of her every word had dark curls and kind, moss eyes. Eyes that Anne had stared at hundreds of times and they were giving the blonde the same look he had given her on so many occasions. 

She tried to look away, her stomach feeling nauseous as it did every time she saw the pair of them together. But she couldn’t, because even though she was in a brief moment of reprieve, seeing Gilbert staring at his fiancée had hurt worse than any of the claws or taunts she had endured. Mary sensed her distress, turning around and catching a glimpse at the scene just before it faded into the scorching African desert.

“Well, aren’t they a lovely pair,” Mary mumbled as she turned back to Anne and took a sip of her tea. 

“He loves her,” Anne whispered, her eyes still glued to where the image once was. A sharp pain shot through her chest, causing her fingers to flinch and drop the tea cup. It shattered into tiny fragments, a visual representation of how she was feeling at that very moment. “He picked her over me.” 

“Did he though?” Mary sipped the final contents of her cup, lifting her eyebrows over the rim. 

Anne’s scrunched her forehead, pulling her eyes away to meet Mary’s gaze. “Obviously, I mean you saw them.” She said sadly as she took the folds of her tattered skirt in her hands, trying to not cry. “And why wouldn’t he pick her? She is beautiful and intelligent and could offer him so much more than I ever could have.”

“Ah yes, his scholarship to the Sorbonne and a few months in Paris with a pretty girl,” Mary said knowingly as she put her cup down and reached for the kettle. “What more could a man like Gilbert ever want?” 

Anne watched as she poured the remaining bits of tea into her cup, a smirk dancing on her lips. “What do you mean?” 

“Think about it.” Mary set down the kettle gently and wiped a drop away from her saucer with her finger, giving Anne a pointed look. “An orphaned boy, the last of his name and has absolutely no chance of ever attending the school of his dreams, finds a woman who has connections to that very same school. She is beautiful and well read, clever and witty…”

Anne nodded at each word.“Exactly my point…” 

Mary held up a finger to stop her. “And yet, despite that woman having all of those things, he still would take time out of his day to be with _ you _ .” She pointed the finger at Anne’s chest, where the pain was slowly getting worse. “To talk with you, to study with you, to help you with trivial tasks. None of which he had to do but _ chose _ to do because he _ wanted to _.” Anne balled her fist tighter, each of Mary’s words hitting her in just the right way. “He wanted you, Anne. He wanted you and you told him to leave.”

“He was already engaged, Mary!” Anne said coldly, bringing a hand up to her chest as she gripped it tightly. “What was I supposed to say?”

“Whatever it was that you truly wanted to say at that moment.” 

Anne’s lip quivered as she recalled the exact words she had wanted to say to him then. _ Don’t go Gil, I need you. I lov… _“He had every opportunity to say that he cared for me...” 

“And so did you,” Mary said smoothly, causing Anne to clamp her mouth closed. She was right. Anne had plenty of opportunities over the years to confess her feelings but every time, she allowed fear to win out.

As if she could read Anne’s thoughts, Mary reached a comforting hand forward, beckoning Anne to take it. Releasing her skirt, she slid her hand across the table into Mary’s. “You both were children when you both started developing strong feelings towards the other,” she said slowly, making sure Anne had time to take in each one before hearing the next. “You both did things that hurt the other in the past, that cannot be changed.” 

Anne’s chest throbbed, her lungs feeling like they were fighting for air under water, but she choked out what she knew would be her final question to Mary. “What if it’s too late?”

Mary squeezed Anne’s hand and offered her a motherly smile. “It’s never too late when you’re destined to be life mates.”

Anne blinked away tears, rubbing her eyes with the back of her free hand. “Thank you, Ma...” When she opened her eyes she found herself looking at Sir Von. Mary was gone, as was the gazebo they had been talking in. All the wisteria trees and honeysuckle vanished, taking along the small semblance of warmth with them. The only remaining object from her time with his sister was the teacup that still lay shattered next to her boots.

Anne puffed out her cheeks and let out an annoyed sigh. “Now what?”

Her answer came in the form of a sharp pain shooting through her ribs, feeling like someone was striking an ice pick into her lungs, immediately doubling her over.

“Oh God!” Anne screamed as she fell to her knees, her forehead banging against the ground. Normally, she would hate the throbbing but in this moment, anything felt better than the torment coursing through her chest. “Oh God, make it stop!”

Anne’s breathing scattered, no breath coming out evenly. _ It’s just a dream Anne! It’s just a dream! _ She repeated the phrase over and over to herself but this was not just a dream, this was crippling agony. Her entire body was being affected, her arms throbbed as they wrapped around her body and her head felt as if it were going to explode. And her lungs, oh, her lungs. It felt as if breathing was a chore they no longer wanted to do. 

Before, her monsters had come to her in a physical form. And those would have been easier to fight. But no, this time there was no wicked monster to fight. There was only her own body, which was becoming the more fearsome foe.

She wanted to scream, beg for the pain to go away, but every time she opened her mouth, the words only came out as gasps. Tears poured from her eyes, creating small puddles against the stone. Sobs tried to escape but the minuscule amount of air she was getting prevented them from ever coming. 

_ Please, someone, make it stop. _ Anne prayed in her head, hoping she would be heard by someone. _ Please. _ The fight for air became worse, fairy specks glimmered in front of her eyes. Soon darkness would consume them and she would drift away. _ I can’t breathe. I can’t… _Her eyes flitted, the tiny orbs evaporating one by one as they faded into black. 

_ Fight_.

Anne’s eyes shot open as a collection of voices called from all around her. 

_ Fight! _They called again, this time fading further away except one. 

_ Fight Anne_! The only remaining voice called. It was deep and raspy, but kind. Fatherly almost. _ Get up and fight. _He instructed. 

Anne did as she was told, forcing her arms out from around her stomach and pressing them into the frigid stones.

“Get up,” Anne said through gritted teeth, stressing her arms to push her up. For a moment, they did as she commanded, only to give way when another surge of pain coursed through her. She landed face first against the ground, her arms splayed out alongside of her. 

The warmth radiating through was counteracted by the icy stones, tempting her to lay there and drift away. _ No. _She scolded herself as she forced her hands back underneath her, her wrists cracking as she pressed the entirety of her weight onto them. 

“Fight.” 

Holding the inside of her cheek in her mouth, she heaved herself up and onto her backside. The sharpness returned, beseeching her to double over again, but she bit down on the side of her cheek harder, drawing metallic liquid as she adjusted her legs underneath her. 

Voices echoed in her mind, only these wicked and heinous, sent to discourage her from proceeding any further. 

“_I’m not kissing a disgusting orphan,” Billy mocked, his lips curled into a disgusted sneer. _

“_Poor Princess Cordelia, no friends to be seen,” Lucy taunted as she pinned Anne against a wall. _

“_Well certainly didn’t pick her for her looks now did they?” _

_ “Anne Shirley has a very bad temper.” Mr. Philips growled as he humiliated her. _

_ “No one will ever love you.” _

“_You’re wrong_!” Anne screamed, banishing the voices from her head. conviction overtook the stabbing pain she felt as she spoke, she was done playing this game. 

“You’re wrong,” she gritted her teeth as she stood on wobbly legs, feeling like a foal taking its first step. The pain was unbearable, stars formed in her eyes but she took a step. 

“You were all wrong.” Another step.

“I’m strong.” Another step, stumbling slightly over an elevated stone. 

She quickly caught herself on a tree, regaining her composure. “I’m strong. I’m beautiful.” Anne stepped forward, walking between trees, each step fighting her to stop. “And...” Her knees felt on the verge of collapsing but she pressed forward. 

“I’m loved.” Anne’s knees gave way, her full weight falling into the ash tree she was holding. _ Come on, Anne. Fight. Keep going. _

Her legs wouldn’t move, they were weak from the few strides they gave her. She collapsed, leaning her back into the tree as she fought to catch her breath. “Come on…” she whispered as she tried to rise but she was done. The exhaustion was too much. 

Just as she was about to allow herself to drift away, to take a brief hiatus from the world, a familiar sound perked her ears. 

It was a sound Anne could identify in her sleep and one that was always comforting. The sound of metal clopping against stone, the intimate whiny of an approaching friend. 

Anne rocked her head to the right, a mahogany mare with a white diamond on her nose stepped towards her, stopping only when she was close enough to bow her head into the resting woman’s hand.

Weakly, Anne lifted her fingers to meet the mare halfway. “Hello there, my dear friend” The moment her fingers touched the velvet hair of the diamond, a random surge of energy coursed through her veins. Her eyelids lifted, her arm no longer feeling as heavy as she ran it down the horses nose.

The horse huffed, shaking her mane so that a set of reins fell into Anne’s outstretched fingers. She followed the mares lead, taking hold of the reins. Before the horse readied to pull her from the ground, she caught a glimpse at the golden nameplate on the bridle, _ Katie _.

Anne smiled. “Thank you, Katie.” 

With a gentle pull on the reins, Anne requested for Katie to lower, which she happily obliged too. Once the horse was comfortably on her knees, Anne grabbed hold of the saddle and heaved herself up onto it. Katie waited as she adjusted herself so that she balanced while leaning forward, only standing when Anne gave her a pat on her neck.

“Katie, go,” Anne whispered, the effort needed to get up on the horses back had drained all of the energy she had been gifted. “I don’t know how long I will be awake for, but go. Take us from this wretched place.” 

Without hesitation, Katie began galloping, her shoes echoing loudly against the path. Anne expected to have trouble holding on, that the bouncing would bring crippling pain but was pleasantly surprised when it had the opposite effect. Instead, it dulled it to the point she thought it would disappear entirely. “Good,” she said with a smile. “I’m not ready to go yet. Go away and stay away.” 

The sound of flapping wings pulled Anne’s attention. She straightened, squeezing her knees tightly together and flicked the reins. “Go!”

Katie cantered, gracefully dodging low hanging branches as she did. As the flapping drew itself closer, Anne’s panic began to set in and with it, the return of the pain.

“Go away!” she screamed as loud as her lungs would allow. Evil cackles paired with the wings now, each malicious voice crescendoing as she rode past them. “Leave me alone,” Anne pleaded. Then, mustering a bit more courage, she repeated loudly, “Leave me alone!” 

Her screams echoed down the endless caverns, the voices and bats seeming to disappear at her command. 

Katie slowed her pace to a walk, her breathing heavy like Anne’s. “Good…girl…” Anne forced out as she patted the mares neck again. After a few moments of silence, before Anne was going to let her exhaustion take over, she dared a glance behind them. If it wasn’t such an effort to breathe, she would have gasped at the happenings behind her.

Every step Katie took shot a pure white beam of light through the floor. As it passed, the path straightened itself, aligning the stones into perfect rows. The beam would then travel to the roots of the trees, breathing life into them much as it had done briefly for Anne. Once defeated soldiers, their limbs weak and barren, now slowly raised themselves to the black sky, ready to fight once more. Anne stared in awe, it was something out of a fairy tale.

Anne only drew her eyes forward when Katie came to a halt in front of the final resting tree, its single branch still stretching high above the rest.

“Sir Von?” Anne asked weakly, the agonizing discomfort in her chest growing with each passing moment.

Katie clopped her hoof to the ground, sending one final beam into the brave Knight. Anne smiled, her head now laying against the horses neck, as Sir Von’s fallen branches lifted to join the branch of hope. Fresh buds appeared as they rose, each one popping into a sweet smelling white flower, reminding Anne to those that lined the White Way of Delight. “Congratulations Sir Von,” she paused to cough, her eyes drooping closed. “You...won…” Her voice trailed off, exhaustion had finally won out.

A tender voice whispered through the trees like a gentle breeze, keeping her awake for a few moments longer. 

_ I promised I wouldn’t leave you. Not now, not ever again. _ She recognized that voice, it was Gilbert’s voice. But why did he sound so sad? Anne didn’t like it when he was sad. When she woke from her nap, she would make sure to question him about what was going on with him. His voice continued, lulling her to sleep. _ Fight, fight just a little bit longer. _

“He is r-right ya know.” Anne slit her eyes open, already knowing in her heart who her final visitor was. She had known it from the moment she realized that this was a dream and that she was dying. If anyone was going to come and whisk her away to the after life, it would be the person who had loved her more than anything in the world.

“I’m tired Matthew,” she whispered, trying to reach out a hand towards the older man. It fell just short of touching his face, but he offered her a smile all the same. 

Matthew lifted his hand and brushed some of her loose hair away from her eyes. “You have every right to be tired,” he spoke softly, just low enough that Gilbert’s voice could still be heard in the background. “You’ve fought long and hard to get here.”

Anne squeezed her eyes closed, small drops of water falling down her cheeks. “I’ve missed you so much, Matthew.” Her words were barely above a whisper, all the emotions she had felt after his passing flooded into her. “Why did you have to go?”

Matthew’s own eyes filled with tears as she wiped them from hers. “Life… life is funny. Sometimes it ends when we are ready, sometimes when we are not.”

“I don’t know if I’m ready...” Anne sobbed as she stared into his cornflower eyes. “I don’t think I’m ready to die.” 

“So don’t,” he said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

She let out a small groan, regretting it immediately as she was sent into a fit of coughs.“Everyone keeps…” Anne worked forward a bit of mucus, giving herself a small reprieve. “Everyone keeps saying that. But I am so tired, Matthew. So tired.” And it was true, if it weren’t for the man she considered her father standing face to face with her, she would have fallen asleep, not caring if she ever woke.

Matthew paused, studying his daughter with great curiosity. “So you’ll just give up?” His voice was stern, a tone she had only heard a handful of times. He wanted to make sure she was listening well. “Because my Anne never gives up. Not for one single moment.” 

Gilbert’s voice became louder, bouncing off of unseen walls as he cried. “_ You can’t go Carrots. You can’t! Not yet. You’re not done here.” _

Anne’s eyes searched for him, no matter how much pain she was in, hearing his cries hurt ten times worse. She wanted to find him, to hold him and tell him it was all going to be okay. But she couldn’t even lift her head from the mare’s neck. How could she ever get to him now? 

“The lad’s right, you’re not done yet,” Matthew said, pulling her attention back. She could see his breath when he spoke, Anne shaking so badly she thought she may fall off the horse. _ Has it always been this cold here? _ “The world still needs Anne Shirley-Cuthbert.” 

Her heart was starting to race now, her fingers going numb in the cold. Matthew sensed this, leaning forward and placing a gentle kiss on her forehead. “You need to fight Anne,” Matthew whispered before pulling away. She wanted to ask him how to help her, if he knew what she needed to do but he simply shook his head. “I can’t help you. Only you can help yourself.” 

Slowly, he took steps away from her, Anne desperately reaching for him. “Please don’t go, I don’t want to say goodbye yet.” 

Matthew shook his head as tears streamed down his face. “It’s not goodbye Anne.”

“Don’t leave me again,” she squeaked, her throat tightening. “Please.” 

Matthew offered her one final smile as he stepped towards the back of the horse. “I am always with you, Anne.” 

Before she could beg him to stay, to talk with her more, he smacked Katie’s rear and sent her flying down the path. Anne’s head was incredibly heavy but she managed to lift it enough to look back, hoping to catch one final glimpse at her adopted father, but he was already gone, a trail of white blossoms laying in his place.

Her fingers had gone numb, she had become so cold in the last few moments. Everything on her body hurt, from her sore legs to the drowning sensation from inside her lungs. Anne wanted to sob, to just curl up on the ground and let the fever win out but she forced herself to straighten as Matthew’s words repeated in her mind. _ You have to fight Anne. _Sitting as straight as possible, she held tight to Katie’s reins as she raced to an unknown destination.

All around them, the tree’s began to fall, cracking the path both in front and behind them. Katie showed no fear as a tree crashed in front of them, jumping over it with ease. Anne started to worry though. If her pain had brought on the monsters, what could the collapsing of it all mean? Was her body finally giving way? Was it too late for her to fight back? Was she dying?

“No,” Anne said forcefully as Katie flew over a pair of fallen branches.

_ I’m not going to die, s_he thought. _ Not today. _

No, today she would live. She would wake from this horrible dream and get well. She would live.

A holy glow appeared in front of her, smaller than a pin hole, but it was there. The place her and Katie needed to make for. _ There you are. _Anne’s happiness lasted only for a moment, the path’s demolition increasing its speed to the point Katie could barely keep up. “Come on, girl! We got this!” 

Katie whinnied as her speed picked up to an unnatural pace as Anne yelled out as loudly as she could. “I will live! I will live for my parents, for Mary!” Her voice caught, the last name hurting more than the rest. “For Matthew.” 

Memories fluttered along the path, each one giving her another reason to live.

“_You are truly something special, Anne with an E,” Cole voice called out, small specks of ocean waves splashing against her cheeks as he and Roy threw her into the ocean with gleeful laughter. _

_ “My darling, sweet bosom friend,” Diana whispered next, the tickles of blown dandelion seeds tickled her nose. _

_ “Oh how I have missed you so.” Marilla’s smile warmed her to the bone. _

Anne’s eyes welled tears. “I’m coming home everyone.” The light grew larger, Anne’s smile joining it in size. 

A final voice echoed around her, only this time it wasn’t a memory she was hearing. This voice was current, each word sending a small shiver down her spine. 

_ “I have loved you from the first moment I met you, perhaps even before then. So live. Live so I can spend each day holding you in my arms and basking in the wonder that is you. I love you Anne Shirley-Cuthbert and I always will.” _

The light grew so large and bright, that Anne had to lift an arm to shield her eyes from its beauty. She knew she should be nervous about what awaited her on the other side, but for the first time since her dream had started, she wasn’t afraid. She was ready.

\-----

A chorus of morning doves cooing were the first sounds that greeted Anne as she cracked her eyes open. The light burned her eyes still, but it felt good as it warmed her to the bone. She went to bring a finger to Katie’s mane, wondering how her mare had fared along their journey when instead she felt a smooth cotton fabric.

Her eyes shot open, not giving a care that they watered severely from the morning sun. Everything around her looked hazy, as if she was seeing through a fresh pair of eyes for the first time. She stared at the ceiling for a moment, allowing the water to evaporate and let her eyes focus, and counted the mahogany planks just above her head. _ Five, with a chip in the one on the farthest right. _A gasp escaped her throat with a moist cough following suit.

“Ouch,” she whispered as she tried to bring a free hand to wipe a drop of spit from her mouth when someone groaned from beside her. 

Her eyes drifted over to the mess of dark brown curls that were resting on the bed, the breathing slow and steady as one of her hands rested into between his. _ Gil. _

She smiled, taking the hand from her chest and pressing down the rogue curl that never wanted to fall in line with the others. Her arm felt heavy as she let it fall from his head, landing just beside their intertwined hands. 

His hands completely covered her petite fingers, giving her a sense of comfort that only he could provide. Something was off about them though, one of his knuckles were covered in dried brown scabs. She reached out to touch them, gently running her index finger across them and regretting it almost instantly. 

Gilbert shot straight up, frantically looking about the room as if he was in trouble. “What? I’m awak..” His voice caught as his moss orbs found the ocean within hers. The color drained from his face, his mouth open in disbelief of what he was seeing. They stared at one another, neither wanting to pull their eyes away in fear the other would disappear.

A gentle autumn breeze entered the room through the cracked window, ruffling Gilbert’s curls enough to pull him from his trance. He removed the scabbed hand from hers, pulling it up to Anne’s freckled face, his fingers hesitantly touching it as if she would break. “A-Anne?” 

Anne wanted to roll her eyes, to say something witty, but her throat felt raw. Instead, she brought a hand to his, pressing his warm fingers onto her cheek. His breath caught, almost as if he forgot how to breathe properly. She smiled softly and swallowed the tiny amount of saliva that had pooled in her cheeks. It wouldn’t allow her to say all the words she desired, so she decided to say, “Hey Gil.” 

The corners of his lips pulled, desperately trying to form a smile when a relieved sob escapes his lips. His broad shoulders shook, the crying becoming more frantic as he brought their interlocked hands to his lips and, between choked words, said, “Hey Carrots.” 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, if anyone is interested in this, I actually planned this story to be a oneshot. It was going to be a simple fic of Gilbert taking care of Anne. Then it evolved into a five chapter story that involved only Marilla, Bash, Winnie, Gilbert, and Anne. And then, as I wrote the first three chapters...it grew. The original draft is still saved on my computer and it was a TOTALLY different story. Now that we are here and it has been finished, I am so happy this is the story I decided to tell. It has been so much fun watching my writing grow, making dear new friends, and watching your speculations in the comments (some of y'all cracked me up lol). So thank you for sticking with me, because this is so much more than just a fic to me. This is the first story I have ever fully published for others to read and helped me prove to myself that I can do it. So thank you all so very very much.
> 
> Thank you to my two kindred spirits of editors, I love you both always and will make sure Gilbert lays of the croissants.
> 
> That being said, I have a very, very special announcement: There is going to be two sequels to this story! One will be a two part story detailing our favorite couples wedding nuptials and the second is a secret that I am so incredibly excited for :) I truly hope you all will join me as we continue on this crazy adventure! Love you all and see you soon in the epilogue xoxo


	14. All is Well

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Allow me to set a scene for everybody:  
*slides across the floor in a button down, sunglasses, singing into my hairbrush. I had just put the final period on the epilogue. Waiting for my proofreaders to go over it* "I'm done! I'm finally done! I can write happy things now! FINALLY!" *continues dancing as my toddler and dogs awkwardly look at me. My music is interrupted by my phone dinging. It's Tessa and Irina.*
> 
> "So we think you need another chapter..."
> 
> *looks into the camera like I am on the office and dramatically collapses to the floor*
> 
> So, yes everyone. I truly apologize for the wait. I hate taking longer than a few weeks to update but when both your editors suggest it needs something more... you know that something is needed. I am so happy with how this turned out and I have loved getting to know some of you over the last few weeks on twitter! Enjoy and see you soon:)

Chapter 14: All is Well

“I did this to you?” Anne whispered. Her throat was still raw but the water Gilbert had provided her certainly helped soothe it. Her fingers touched a small scratch running along his cheek, one he had just informed her that she gave to him while trying to give her pain medication. He grabbed her hand, weaving his fingers in between hers with a smile. 

“It’s alright,” Gilbert said, his eyes glued to her as if he was still afraid she would slip away from him at any moment. “It didn’t hurt as much as it did seeing you in such horrible pain.” 

A tiny blush crept up Anne’s neck as he reminded her that she had been screaming and thrashing for almost a whole day, making an utter fool of herself. She wanted to bury herself back under her covers and was considering doing so when Gilbert brought his free hand to her cheek, brushing back a tuft of hair as he adjusted himself on the bed. Originally, he had sat across from her so he could check her heart and lungs, but opted to stay there so they could talk as Anne leaned against her headboard. His fingers lingered on her cheek, something she had been noticing was becoming more frequent in the passing days of her illness. As much as she enjoyed it and wished he could stay like that forever, she found herself turning her head away as images of a honey haired woman crossed her mind.

Gilbert's smile fell with his hand. “What’s wrong?” he asked obliviously.

“You shouldn’t do that…” Anne muttered, finding a spot on the floor to hold her attention. “Your fiancée wouldn’t approve.”

“Anne,” Gilbert’s voice had a nervous edge to it. “I, uh…”

“Please don’t.” Her lip quivered, she was exhausted from her fighting the disease the last few days and she was certain she would break if she heard him say anything about his soon to be wife. A finger pulled her chin up and over, forcing her to meet his gaze.

His eyes glowed, underlying bliss causing them to sparkle a brighter shade of green than normal. “I’m not engaged, Anne. Not anymore.”

Anne felt her jaw lax, the words he had just uttered not fully processing. “What did you say?”

“I, uh, I’m not engaged anymore,” Gilbert chuckled as he ruffled his curls, his eyes drifting to their conjoined hands. “Winnie and I, well, we decided we weren’t right for one another.”

“_But she’s perfect!_” Anne said before she could stop the words from leaving her lips. 

An amused smirk appeared as he said. “Win is pretty incredible, yes. And maybe someday she will be perfect for someone, if she so chooses. But she _ isn’t _perfect for me.”

She stared at him, her mind perplexed as her eyes narrowed questioningly. “I don’t believe I am understanding. If she isn’t perfect for you… then who else could be?” Gilbert’s eyes slowly drifted up, watching as the cogs turned within Anne’s brilliant mind. Despite the underlying exhaustion, her eyes locked with his as she reached the conclusion he was hinting at. Her eyes grew wide, her drooping lids instantly forgetting they wanted rest. “_Me?_”

The word came out as a breath, a tickle appearing in her throat alongside her words. A series of harsh coughs came next, reminding her that she was only just now recovering from pneumonia. Gilbert reached over to the table and handed her a pewter mug filled with lukewarm tea, biting his cheek as she took small sips. 

Finishing off the remaining contents, she handed the cup back to him as she wiped away small dribbles from around her mouth. She stared at him in disbelief. _ Me? He ended his engagement for me? _ Gilbert set it aside, his eyes quickly returning to hers as a million thoughts swarmed about her brain like a furious cluster of wasps. _ The things he said in my dream, they were real. He loves me. My dearest friend loves me. _

Gilbert’s fingers twitched against hers. He anxiously awaited for her to share what she was feeling in that moment but was patient enough to let her process it all. Still, Anne opened her mouth and said the one thing he was afraid of hearing. “No.” 

His entire body deflated, his very heart shattering like a dropped teacup against the solid ground. “No?”

Anne shook her head. “No Gil, you don’t love me. _ You can’t.” _

“What do you mean I can’t?” Gilbert asked flabbergasted. “Anne, I…”

She pulled her hand away, still shaking her head. “No, stop.” Tears started forming in his eyes as she swallowed hard. “Gil, you can’t. We can’t…” Anne stopped, her lungs tightening her chest. He couldn’t do this. She wouldn’t allow him to do this, not after all the pain she put herself through to let him go.

“We can’t what?” Gilbert’s voice was desperate, dew drops being blinked from his eyes onto their still conjoined hands. 

It hurt to see him like that more than Anne could have ever imagined, but she knew she would have to break his heart once more to stop him from making a choice he would regret for the rest of his life. “We can’t be together, Gil.” The words left her mouth like venom, each one perfectly designed to make him leave again. To go back to Winifred and to continue to follow his dream, no matter how much it hurt them both. Gilbert didn’t say anything, his face void of all color. Anne continued despite her own heart feeling as if it were about to burst. “I am so sorry, but we can’t. We wouldn’t be happy and nothing good would ever come from it…”

Anne stopped dead, her mouth hanging open as Gilbert squeezed her fingers so hard that they began to numb as his entire body shook. She wanted to hold him, to tell him everything he wanted to hear as her own eyes began to mist over. Anne wanted to pull her hand away but found herself not able too. She found the feeling of his fingers and warmth to be so comforting and if she pulled away, she may completely break. _ Don’t stop. You made the mistake of asking him to stay while you were scared. You allowed him to hold you, to kiss you. You made this harder on the both of you Anne Shirley, now it’s time to end it. End it for him. “ _I think you should…

“Do you love me?”

Her stomach churned as he asked her the one question that she knew couldn't lie about. “Gil...” she whispered, forcing her hand to try to separate from his. His grip loosened, he would let her go if that was what she truly wanted but she didn’t pull any more. 

His lip quivered as he repeated his question. “Anne, do you love me?”

Anne sniffed, her head once again shaking against her will. “Please don’t ask me that.” 

“Anne, if you don’t love me, tell me.” Gilbert pleaded, his eyes full of desperation and fear. “Tell me you don’t love me and I will never bother you about it again.”

“Gil, please,” she croaked, her own sobs rising fast.

“I know I don’t deserve your love. I don’t.” His voice strained as their hands were soaked with tears. “I have been a selfish, stupid man and I hate myself for all the pain I have caused everyone I care about. Most of all you.” The entire bed shook beneath them, his entire body was shaking uncontrollably. Anne stared at him, salt water dripping from her eyes and dampening her hair. “Leaving you, proposing to a woman that I thought I loved, it's all despicable. And it's even worse considering that I almost had to lose you completely for me to come to my senses. But I can’t deny my affections any longer Anne. I can’t.” _ Don’t do this. Don’t say it. Stop him. _ But she said nothing as he continued his ramblings, not because she couldn’t find the words, but because she wanted to hear him say it with her own ears. To allow her to know it wasn’t just her fever playing another cruel trick on her mind. “I love you, Anne. I've _ always _ loved you and I know now that there is no trying to deny it.” 

He dared to reach his hand forward, longing to touch her face. “I love your mind, your laugh, your wit. I love all the parts of you that you detest about yourself.” Anne flinched as he reached for the blue ribbon tied in her locks, running a timid finger down her curls. “I can’t marry Winifred, or anyone for that matter, because my heart...” he brought their hands to his chest, allowing her to feel the rhythm racing of his heart beneath his stained cotton shirt. 

“My very soul belongs to you. No one else will ever be able to lay claim to it because it has always been yours. Even before we met each other in the woods that cold January morning, it was yours. And it will be yours until the day I take my last breath.” Anne was now shaking along with him, biting back sobs as he pleaded with her. _ “Please, tell me. _”

“I have nothing to offer you,” Anne said, her throat and lungs blazing with pain. Gilbert started to shake his head, trying to bring his hand up to her cheek but she shied away from it. “I am a school teacher, who is too afraid to leave behind the first place I have ever called home. I would hold you back.” 

“That’s not-”

“You once said to me that you never wanted to be a country doctor, that you wanted to help as many people that you could.” Her words came out as sobs, recalling the emotions she felt when Gilbert first expressed those longings to her on graduation night. “You deserve more than to just sign death certificates. You deserve to save people, to be renowned around the world. And I can’t give you that.” He opened his mouth to say something but now that she was started, the words came pouring from her as she looked down, allowing water to pool on her bedsheets. “Letting you go was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life but _ I knew _ I couldn’t keep you here. A piece of me died when you left for Paris, a piece of me I have finally come to terms with losing. Because I knew it was what was best for _ you _ and _ your dream...” _

Gilbert pulled his hand from her grasp and held her cheeks firmly between both of his hands, forcing her to look at him. “_You are my dream._” Anne’s eyes widened as his face slowly inched towards hers. “My dream of being a big time doctor, of leaving Avonlea, they were dreams of a child who had nothing. It’s taken some time, but I realize now that I don’t want that.” If it weren't for the rawness of her throat, she would have squeaked out some sort of argument but, she was beginning to tire once more. Instead, she allowed him to continue, closing her eyes as she absorbed each note of the sweet song he was constructing. “I want to spend the summers in the orchard, listening to one of your amazing stories as Delly plays with her friends. I want to spend cold winter nights curled up next to you as we drift off to sleep in each other's embrace. I want to spend the rest of my days ensuring you know that I am so incredibly sorry for any pain I have caused you over the years. I want you Anne, I’ve always wanted you.” He pressed his forehead against hers, each taking in the others scent of sweat and exhaustion. But it didn’t matter to either of them, all the both of them could focus on was the tingling sensation running throughout both of their nerves. “You’re the dream I have had since I was a little boy, imagining what true love was like. You’re what I dreamed of every night that I was away travelling the world. You, Anne Shirley-Cuthbert, are the fulfillment of every dream I have ever had.” 

Anne felt the air around them disappear, her breathlessness not being caused by the fluid in her lungs. “Oh Gil,” she whispered as she brought her hands up to join his and opened her eyes. Gilbert inhaled sharply, his nerves rising. “We won’t have anything and we’ll be as poor as church mice.”

The blacks of his eyes consumed the moss laden irises. “Are you saying that you…” 

“Yes.” Anne interrupted, relief tugging at her lips. Gilbert exhaled quickly, the warmth of his breath warming her cheeks as she finished. “I love you Gilbert Blythe.”

Neither could hold in their sobs any longer as euphoria took them over. Anne moved her hands from his and brought them up to Gilbert's head, lacing them through his curls to bring him as close as she could. He shook his head in disbelief, rubbing their noses together as he blinked away large crystals. His face fell into Anne’s shoulder, her nightgown sticking to her skin as he soaked it through with each sob. “I am so sorry Anne,” he mumbled into her collar bone.

“Hey, look at me.” Anne gave his hair a small tug and he lifted his head. She softened her gaze and took an unstable breath. “You’re not the only one that has made mistakes over the years. I have my own sins to atone for.”

Gilbert knitted his brow together, wearing the look of confusion that Anne adored. “You’re sorry?” He questioned as he wiped his eyes on the back of his sleeve. “What could you possibly have to be sorry for?”

“Well,” Anne gave a small cough to clear her throat while they adjusted their seating positions back to normal. “I haven’t been entirely honest with you either.”

Gilbert smirked, his cheeks still stained red. “Wouldn’t happen to have anything to do with _your_ _fiancé, _would it?”

Anne opened her mouth for a quick moment before snapping it shut. “How…” 

“Roy told me,” he answered, rubbing his swollen knuckles. “We had a _ slight _ disagreement _ . _” Anne eyed him suspiciously, casting the smallest glance to his hands. Gilbert let out an exasperated sigh. “Okay, a major disagreement that ended in a small altercation but that’s besides the point. What the point is this: I know everything.”

“Everything?” Anne asked with the slightest blush. 

“Everything.”

“Even that I was marrying Roy to…”

“_Everything_,” Gilbert repeated with his eyebrows raised. Anne closed her eyes and released an airy laugh, a hoarse cough following suit. Once the cough cleared, she beamed from ear to ear and let out additional giggles at the insanity of the situation. He gazed at her with adoration, the sound of her laugh washing away all his worries of the weekend. She was here, she was awake, and she was laughing, all finally felt right with the world.

Anne wiped a tear from her eye, this one from her laughter instead of sadness, and became serious. “Gil, I am truly sorry for lying to you.” She reached forward for his hand and squeezed it tightly. “The letter I wrote to you, the one where I told you about Roy…” Gilbert bit his lip, the tiniest bit of hurt coming with the memory. Apparently, it brought the same emotions to Anne, who closed her fingers tighter. “I was hurt and too prideful to admit it was partially my fault. I wanted to show you that I was well off without you.”

“And are you?” Gilbert asked, his boyish smirk brought the smile back to Anne’s face.

“Definitely not. I almost did just perish after you not being here for a few short months.” A moment ticked by before they both broke down in fits of chuckles. They were both exhausted, both on the brink of mania but laughing together had never felt so good. Even though it was occasionally interrupted by a cough, things finally felt normal again. When their giggles died down, their gazes locked as they always seemed to do, both wearing matching tender smiles. Anne, despite feeling genuinely happy for the first time in ages, still felt the slightest sense of guilt for hurting him. “I am sorry, though, Gil.”

“Me too, Anne-girl,” he said before pressing his lips against her forehead. The warmth of his lips sent chills down her spine, a longing for more growing in the pit of her stomach. Slowly, she tilted her chin up, encouraging his lips to travel down to the tip of her nose. In silent understanding, he obliged to her wishes, placing a coy kiss on the tip before travelling to her cheek. She shuddered, all her body aches disappearing as he creeped closer to her lips. A miniscule amount of distance between them, their breathing quickened, the desperation to close the final gap making both of their hearts race when a cough forced its way forward. 

Anne turned her head, not wanting to cough in his face as she hacked. Gilbert reached over to her nightstand, grabbing her handkerchief and held it up for her to spit into. “I-” Another cough. “I’m sorry.” She spat the last of the green mucus into the rag before he pulled it away. 

Gilbert smiled, “It’s okay Carrots. Truly.” He swiped his thumb across her cheek. “It can wait.”

Anne smirked to hide her disappointment, she had felt they had waited long enough but deep down, she knew he was right. She was only just recovering from an illness that almost killed her, their special moment would have to wait just a little while longer. 

Her stomach stopped aching for his closeness and let out a booming growl, her appetite returning after such a long absence. Gilbert snorted. “I think it’s time for some breakfast.” He gave one final caress to her cheek before he rose from the bed, stretching out his back with a groan. Anne bit her lip as he turned to face her and kissed the top of her head as he whispered, “I’ll be right back. Be prepared for the mobs to come for you.” Before he could even take a step, Anne gripped his wrist with such force that she almost pulled him back on the bed. “What’s wrong?”

“Gil, I have been in this room for the last four days and I am entirely sure if I sit in here for one more moment I will fall into utter madness.” Anne said as she threw the quilts from her legs, not caring that her legs were exposed to just above her knee. She was starving and the only thing that mattered was the smell of ham as it wafted under the seams of her door. 

Gilbert swallowed, trying to look in any other direction besides her bare legs. “Uh, Anne, I don’t think this is the best idea. Your fever is just...” 

“I can do this with your help or without,” Anne said as she struggled to throw her legs over the side of the bed. “It would be much… Oh for heaven's sake, would you look at me so you can help me up?” 

He took in a deep breath in through his nose and lowered his gaze, taking extra care to focus on her outstretched hand. “I really don’t condone this, Anne,” Gilbert mumbled, but he still reached for her slender hand and helped her rise. Her legs wobbled, her weight now unfamiliar to them, but using Gilbert’s arm for extra support, she managed to stay upright. 

With her arm laced within his and him holding more of her weight than she would care to admit, she shot him a triumphant smile. “Now that is settled, I am ready to see the rest of my family.” 

———

Anne never noticed how much she loved the sounds of the kitchen. On most days, she would be in a hurry, running to stick a final pin in her hair as she gave Marilla a kiss good morning before quickly shoving a piece of toast in her mouth and rushing out the door. But this morning was different than all others. Today, walking arm in arm with Gilbert, she appreciated the orchestra of noises coming from just down the stairs. From the sizzling of the lard against cast iron to the mild _ ting _of wooden spoon scraping against a bowl, to the out of tune humming of Mrs. Lynde, each sound sounded more glorious than the rest. She stopped at the top of the stairs and closed her eyes, partially to take a moment to catch her breath but mostly to just enjoy the sweet symphony of day to day life. 

“You alright?” Gilbert whispered close to her ear. 

“Mhm,” she hummed as her eyes fluttered open, their faces closer together again so no one could hear their hushed tones. “It just… it sounds so beautiful, doesn’t it?” 

Gilbert smiled in understanding. “Yes, yes it does.” Anne would have stood there longer and he would have surely have let her, but her stomach once again made its needs known. “Come on, let’s get you downstairs.” 

The stairs of Green Gables were steep for even those with the best of balance, Anne even recalling herself tumbling down the first few nights when she was first adopted, but Gilbert took extra care to hold her steady. Her lungs ached from the extra use but she was too stubborn to care. She would make it down these stairs and she would have breakfast with her family. About halfway down, she began to make our faint voices that chittered away as they cooked. 

“Hazel, dear, could you pass me the salt?” the stout Rachel Lynde requested. 

Hazel handed the salt bowl over with a curt nod and went back to her task of slicing the ham. She already had a stack that looked as if she could feed a small army, leading Anne to wonder just how many people had stayed within the four walls of her home. The bottom step creaked as they finally finished their descent, catching Mrs. Lyndes ear. 

“Diana, I hope that is you.” She wipes her hands on the flour covered apron, and turns towards the platform. “I would really like an update on Anne, but I am…” Mrs Lyndes eyes connected with Anne’s and the bowl of batter she held in her hands clattered to the ground, her mouth sitting agape. 

Hazel looked down to the fallen batter and gasped in surprise. “Miss Rachel, are you…” Anne smiled as the second woman’s gaze locked with hers, her mouth falling just as low as her friends. 

Gilbert squeezed her arm tightly, almost as he was silently saying _ here we go. _

Anne wasn’t nervous and cleared her throat. “Good morn…” 

Joyous sobs erupted from the other end of the room. “Praise God! Oh, praise the heavens above!” Rachel sobbed, pushing aside the table and every object that stood between her and Anne. Hazel remained in her position, massive tears rolling down her cheeks as she uttered what Anne thought was a prayer under her breath.

“Anne, oh my sweet Anne,” Rachel sobbed into her shoulder, gripping Anne’s chest so tight that her breathing became uneven. Before Gilbert could ask her to release the young woman, Mrs. Lynde pulled away, taking Anne’s freckled cheeks in her hands. “I knew you would be alright. Didn’t I Hazel?” She looked back at her friend, who had pulled out a chair and was now sobbing into her hands. Rachel sighed and turned back to Anne, her own eyes misting. “I told them all, ‘if anyone, I mean _ anyone, _can survive this, it’s our Anne.’ Sure, you had to give us a right good scare but I knew in my very bones that you would be just fine.” Anne brought a free hand to hold Rachel, who despite her smile, her face was now the color of a turnip.

“I’m sorry for any concern I caused, Rachel,” Anne said softly. Mrs. Lynde frantically nodded, sending tears about the room as she pulled Anne in for another embrace. Gilbert found himself releasing his love’s arm, allowing her to fully embrace the older woman as she sobbed.

It was a short quiet moment, like the calm before a treacherous storm. The storm, however, came in the form of two men toppling over one another as they fought to get through the small entryway from the living room. Anne and Rachel separated, the latter holding the other up for support, as Cole and Roy finally squeezed into the kitchen, their tired eyes wide with panic. 

“We heard yelling!” Cole said through heavy breathing.

“Isth everything alright?” Roy finished, his face was almost back to its normal, smug self but his cut lip and purple bruise on his cheek still remained as a reminder of the disagreement on Saturday afternoon. Their eyes immediately found a beaming Anne, the worry instantly melting away from their expressions.

“Anne!” they yelled in unison before storming forward, Rachel making a narrow escape before the two men scooped their friend in their arms in a group hug. If Gilbert would have seen the sight a few days ago, Roy holding Anne in such an embrace, he may have found himself jealous. But today, the glorious smiles and tears that were streaming down everyone's faces as they all talked at the same time, each one trying to get out every thought they had as if it were their last moments together.

“I can’t believe it!” Roy said as they brought her to the floor, still holding her waist tightly in his arms.

“Is this real? Am I dreaming?” Cole asked, holding her face and running fingers through her hair.

“This is real,” Anne reached up, pinching Cole’s cheek in between her fingers, earning a small yelp in return. “And I am here to stay.”

“That’s good,” Roy said, pulling her attention towards him. “Because we would all be lost without you, _ Shirley.” _ He put an extra drawl on Anne’s nickname as he shot a wink to Gilbert. 

“Oh?” Anne’s eyes widened as she got her first good look at Royal’s face. “What on earth happened?!” Gilbert thought the look he received from Marilla was the scariest one he had ever seen, but nothing, absolutely _ nothing _ could strike more fear into him than the look the redhead was giving him now. He cowered slightly, thankful that Anne wasn’t at full strength. 

Roy chuckled, tilting his head so he blocked Anne’s line of sight. “Shirley, it's on me.” Anne narrowed her eyes, clearly unconvinced. “I swear. In fact, I like to think he knocked some common sense into me.”

“Really now?” she said suspiciously.

“Yes,” Roy replied matter of factly, adjusting his grip so that Cole could take over the duty of helping her stand. He wrung his hands together, a faux nervousness crossing his expression. “So much sense that I have some bad news for you.” Anne cocked an eyebrow, Cole holding in what was sure to be a serious bout of giggles. “I can’t marry you, Shirley.”

Collective gasps came from near the stove, Hazel and Rachel both dropping their act that they weren’t eavesdropping in on the group. The young people all turned to them in unison, silently instructing them that they didn’t desire them to be a part of the conversation. Hazel picked up on the signal before Rachel, so far as giving a frantic nod and wide eyes. “I, uh.. We uh…” An idea finally struck her. “Miss Rachel, we should go fetch Miss Marilla, I am sure she will be thrilled at the news.”

Rachel continued to stare at the group of young people before her, Hazel’s words falling upon deaf ears. A second ticked and Hazel gave her friend a small nudge, pulling her from her trance. “Yes, yes. Marilla.” Rachel said quickly, obviously displeased at being asked to walk away from what could turn into the biggest story to hit the Avonlea gossip chain since Muriel Stacy decided to move to Scotland. Nonetheless, Rachel and Hazel both excused themselves, pushing past Gilbert before disappearing up the stairs.

“Okay, what is going on here?” Anne asked as she looked between the three of most important men in her life, utterly confused by their varying expressions. Gilbert closed his eyes, holding air tightly in his body while Cole’s cheeks had sunk into a deep shade of cherry as he held in what Anne could only assume was booming laughter. Roy, who was now holding his hands clasped in front of his face as he took a calming breath, finally broke the overwhelming silence.

“It’s exactly what I said, _ my dear,” _Roy’s last words dripping with as much sarcasm he could muster, his mocking sadness becoming more obvious. “I am afraid I can no longer marry you. We are finished. Done. Concluded. Ended…”

“_Royal,_” Cole rolled his eyes, a laugh hanging heavy on his tongue. 

“What? We all know how much she likes when I use my big words,” Roy smirked for a second before he became serious for the first time. “Anne, I’m letting you go.”

Anne lifted her chin, her eyes swarming with questions. “Roy… we had a deal… we…” Her gaze drifted towards the curly haired man in the corner, who was still finding it difficult to breathe or look at the woman he just professed his love too. She swallowed hard, her still tender throat burning as the saliva slid down as her attention shifted back to her friend. “What of your family? Your brother and sisters?”

Sadness grew in his eyes as it so often did at the mention of his younger siblings but he maintained the air of confidence that Anne so admired about him. “I will explain to them that it was my decision to end this, that I cannot go on living my life as a fraud. That I cannot hold back a woman I care so deeply about from where she truly belongs.” All eyes in the room drifted to Gilbert, who had now managed to look at the man who was once his enemy with a grateful smile. Roy nodded, accepting his gratitude before he took large strides over to the baffled redhead, holding her shoulders tight in his hands to draw her attention.

Ocean met the shore line when they looked at one another, the waves restless with questions and confusion. “You’re the best of us all Shirley, don’t you forget it.” Roy smiled gently as he leaned forward and placed a kiss on top of Anne’s curls. She released her grip on Cole, pulling her hands up to hold Roy’s firm arms in her hands. 

“Roy,” Anne whispered as his lips left her forehead, a single tear glistening on her cheek. 

“Hey, no worrying for me now,” Roy gazed over to the man he loved, adoration radiating between the pair. “I’ll be just fine.” Gilbert couldn’t help but smile at the sight, he hadn’t seen this side of Roy before but now, he found himself understanding why Anne would make such a commitment to him. The appreciation lasted for a millisecond, Roy turning to face him with a smirk. “Besides, you’re gonna have your hands full. After all,” Roy leaned Anne back into Cole and walked over to Gilbert, giving a short slap on his shoulder. “You’re going to have to make sure this _ idiot _ uses that big brain of his more often.” 

Gilbert shoved Roy’s shoulder in a friendly way before everyone started chuckling. It felt good, like stepping outside for the first time after days of confinement because of a storm. Anne stopped laughing before the men, her lungs tired but she couldn’t wipe the smile off of her face. All was beginning to feel right within her small world when suddenly, loud stomping rose from the upstairs hallway.

All eyes turned towards the stairs, just in time to see a raven haired woman, still fully clothed in her work skirt and apron, come speeding down the stairs. “Anne and Gilbert are gone! Where is she! Where is…” Diana toppled down the last step, Roy and Gilbert holding out their hands just in time to catch her before she fell face first into the oak floors. “Gilbert?” she said wide eyed as they helped her upright. “If you’re down here… then where is…” Her head turned slowly to where Anne stood, grinning from ear to ear.

“Miss Barry, that is not distinguished behavior for a _ proper _lady,” Anne said in her best teacher tone, scolding her best friend's behavior. Diana, without a word, shoved Gilbert and Roy away from her and launched herself into Anne, knocking them both to the ground and on top of a startled Cole. 

“Anne! You had me so worried! You were seizing… and your fever… and Gilbert wasn’t sure if you were going to be alright so I moved upstairs to be closer to you and....” Diana’s words flowed from her in a way much like how Anne would have reacted if their situations were first. Anne nodded along as her bosom friend listed off all the events of the weekend as if she were an auctioneer. “And you… you almost died. I almost lost you.” She grabbed Anne’s face tightly in her hands, squishing her cheeks together as she planted hundreds of kisses all over her friend's freckled cheeks. Anne’s grin did not disappear as drops of happiness landed in Diana’s frizzy hair. In truth, Gilbert thought the two of them could have sat there for the rest of the day, sobbing and holding the other but Cole grunted from below them. 

“Hey, could we…” He strained to get out, most of their weight sitting on his diaphragm. 

“Oh God, Cole!” Diana cried, realizing for the first time that the soft padding was their dear friend. Gilbert walked over, helping Anne stand while Roy helped Diana and then his love. Anne leaned into Gilbert, nuzzling perfectly into the crook of his arm as she looked up to him. The dark circles under her eyes told him that she was getting more exhausted with each passing second but he knew that he couldn’t pull her away from her family even if he wanted too. Instead, he offered support as she held strong while watching Cole, Roy, and Diana all talk excitedly to one another, only to be interrupted by Anne’s stomach letting out a rambunctious growl. “You must be starving! Here, let me get you breakfast.” 

Diana took command of the kitchen, barking orders for Cole and Roy to take over toast, ham, and egg duty while she continued to make the pancakes that Mrs. Lynde had been stirring. Anne looked up to Gilbert, his chin dipping down and placing a gentle kiss on her forehead. “You doing alright?” he whispered softly, receiving a nod from her in return. 

“Mhm, just hungry,” Anne responded. He could feel her legs starting to wobble, she was trying to maintain a strong facade but after her weekend, he was impressed she had made it this long without collapsing.

“Come on _ Shirley _,” Gilbert said with a smirk. “Let’s get you a chair.” She nodded once more, too tired to even give him a verbal response as he half carried her towards the nearest chair and set her in it. 

“Gilbert, could you grab the dishes and set the table?” Diana commanded, pointing a spatula at the spare platters on the table below the stairs without even looking up from her task. Marilla had to pull extra china to feed the army that had been helping with Anne’s care and didn’t have room for them in the normal hutch. 

Gilbert looked down at Anne, who was watching her friends pamper to her, so he felt she was well enough he could leave her sitting for a little while. He walked over, grabbing the plates and readied to set the table when two sets of footsteps came down the stairs. 

“Alright Hazel, you go back on toast and I’ll finish the batter. Our dear Anne must be starving and we must be sure all is ready when Marilla comes down.” Gilbert smirked as the two women rounded the stairs, both sets of eyes growing wide as they watched Diana command the kitchen, Cole and Roy elegantly dancing around one another as they did their tasks. “What on earth?” 

Diana turned with a grin, “Ah, good morning! Don’t mind us, please take your seats and allow us to take over.”

“You don’t need help with anythin’?” Hazel asked cautiously. The cooking crew exchanged glances and shook their heads.

“I believe we have this handled, Miss Lacroix,” Cole said as he flipped a fried egg onto a dish already garnished with toast. 

Roy placed the kettle on the holder, the water ready to boil. “Please sit, you both have been cooking for us all weekend. It’s the least we can do.”

“Well, I…” Rachel hesitated for a moment when Anne reached her hand out, giving it a weak squeeze. 

“Come keep me company, I will grow frightfully bored if I don’t have company,” Anne said sweetly. That was all the convincing the women needed as they took their arranged seats at the table. “Now Rachel, I know I have had to miss _ something _while I was unwell.”

Rachel smiled mischievously and leaned closer to Anne, “You remember Prissy, yes?” Gilbert tuned out their conversation not long after that, his focus returning to the dishes he was supposed to be setting on the table when a third set of footsteps caught his attention. He looked up the stairs, Marilla, who was still in her night dress and hair was pinned back loosely, took each step slowly. The kitchen was full of commotion, between the conversations and the clattering of pans and ingredients, but when he saw the look on Marilla’s face as she saw her daughter laughing at her kitchen table, nothing else mattered in the room. 

Marilla held tight to the railing, her knees wobbling together as she stared at Anne, the light shining in from the window catching her hair perfectly that it almost made her look ethereal. Gilbert walked over to her, no one else quite yet realizing the woman's entrance into the room, and rested a hand on top of hers. Only when he gave it a tight squeeze did she break her stare and look at him, tears pouring down her cheeks like rain. 

“Thank you.” The room silenced around them, everyone stopping their conversation and task to watch as Marilla took the final step and threw her arms around the young man she considered to be her son. She sobbed into his chest for a moment, him hugging her as tight as he could until she pulled away to look him dead on. “Thank you, Gilbert.”

He had no words, at least none that he could say that wouldn’t bring him to tears. So instead, he offered a smile and nod before nudging Marilla’s shoulder so she could face a now standing Anne. She was putting too much weight against the table and she wouldn’t last long, but it didn’t matter. Anne had managed to stand on her own and was facing her mother as she fought back tears.

“Hi Ma…” Marilla rushed to Anne, grabbing her even more tight than she had Gilbert and together the women sobbed into each other, whispering words that only the other could hear. Looking about the room, not a single eye was dry and a single line of smoke appeared behind Cole.

“Uh Cole, the eggs are burning.” Gilbert warned, shifting everyone's attention back to reality. 

“Ah!” Cole yipped as he flicked the hot egg out of the pan and into the fireplace before they completely burnt to a crisp. All eyes were on him, wide with concern. “Uh, sorry. Did somebody want that?”

Laughter erupted in every corner of the room, Anne and Marilla still holding tight to one another as their shoulders lifted in harmonious giggles. Diana whacked Cole with her rag, bumping him aside with a smile as she took over his job. The kitchen waltz continued, Rachel and Hazel eventually deciding sitting wasn’t for them and took the plates from Gilbert and began to set the table. 

Gilbert watched quietly from the front corner of the room, deciding it being his best option to stay out of everyone's way while they finished their tasks. His gaze didn’t stay in one place too long, watching laughter and jokes being played, silent scoldings followed by cheeky responses, when his stare finally locked with Annes. No matter how crazy a room could be, he always knew he would find her eyes. They were dancing as she looked at him, her relief and happiness cancelling out all her exhaustion. He understood the feeling well, for he felt the exact same thing.

“Phew, what is smellin’ so delightful on this fair mornin’?” Bash asked as he walked down the hall, Delly still half asleep in his arms. 

“Oi, he lives!” Hazel called from where she was flipping the toast with Roy. “I swear son, you could sleep through Armageddon and that daughter of yours is no better!” 

Bash entered the room with a smile. “Possibly, but I am still not sure why we are…” He didn’t finish his statement as he saw the reason for the celebration. Unlike the rest of the group, he didn’t rush towards her and throw her into a bone crushing hug. Instead, his smile grew and he nodded his head. “Welcome back, Queen Anne.”

“Good to be back, Bash,” Anne said, returning his nod and eyeing the young girl in his arms, wiggling a finger for him to bring her over. He obliged, carrying his daughter across the room where Anne poked the toddlers cheek. “Delly, sweet girl, wake up.” Delly stirred, still not ready to wake as she let out a complaining grunt. Anne prodded her again with a chuckle. “Her Royal Highness, Princess Delphine, would you please wake up? I would so love a hug.” This seemed to catch the young girls attention as she shot up, nearly taking her father's nose with her.

“Auntie Anne!” Delly squealed, leaning so far forward that Bash almost dropped her into Anne’s lap. “You awake!” Anne held out her arms to take her. Bash set her down gently, Delly’s arms wrapping around Anne’s neck as she filled her cheeks with sloppy kisses. “Unsel Gilbur make you okay! Okay!”

Anne looked over to the man she loved once more before responding. “Yes, he did, princess. Yes, he did.” Gilbert’s nose tingles, the familiar feeling he got as tears formed. He rubbed it with the palm of his hand, determined to not cry anymore this weekend and perhaps the rest of his life. Delly pulled Anne’s face back to her as she began going on about her adventures with the horses yesterday morning and that Midnight would only take sugar treats from her.

Sebastian took two piping cups of coffee from his mother, kissing her cheek lightly before making his way towards his brother. “Good mornin’, Gilby goo.” 

Gilbert smirked, accepting the cup with silent thanks. They stood shoulder to shoulder, taking small swigs of their coffee as they watched the scene unfold around them, paying close attention to the bouncing little girl who was more than thrilled to be nuzzled by her Aunt. 

“You don’t seem surprised that she is alright,” Gilbert said, only a little confused by his brother's reaction. 

“Why should I be? Anne is a fighter. And more importantly,” he nudged Gilbert's shoulder. “She had a pretty great doc.” Gilbert smiled, a blush creeping onto his neck. “I’m proud of you brother. And, know that no matter where you and she,” he gestured his cup towards Anne as she began twisting Delly’s fine curls between her fingers, “end up, you will always have a home to come back to.”

“Thanks Bash,” Gilbert said, putting his mug on the table and taking his brother in his arms. Bash, returning the hug with a small laugh as Gilbert once again mumbled into his shirt, “I love you.”

“I love you, too brother. Even if you are a moke,” Bash joked as he pulled away, giving Gilbert a slight tap on his cheek. If it were any other day, any other occasion, Gilbert would roll his eyes, offer some sort of witty remark. But nothing could bother him today. He had his family, his friends. _And_ _most importantly, _he thought as he took a swig of the dark sludge, watching the fire goddess giggle profusely with her mother and niece. _I have you, Anne. _

“Alright everyone! Breakfast is ready!” Rachel announced, placing a large tray of pancakes, toast, sliced ham, and eggs in the center of the table.

“Outside!” Delly announced, looking up at Anne with a hopeful expression.

“Outside?” Rachel pondered but Anne understood immediately.

“Why Delly, I think a picnic sounds like a marvelous idea. But I need to make sure Uncle Gilby is okay with it.” She looked up to Gilbert, awaiting his approval. In fact, all eyes turned to him as he finished off the last of his coffee. 

Slamming the mug down on the table, he walked over to his two favorite girls and announced loudly, “Outside!” Before there were any protests, the younger crowd went about grabbing the food, offering instructions towards the older adults. Delly jumped off of Anne’s lap, beelining for the door before anyone could stop her. 

“Delphine! Get back here!” Hazel yelled as she and Bash rushed out the door to catch up with the young girl. 

Diana, Roy, and Cole carried the various trays of butter and food, while Rachel followed closely behind with the coffee pitcher and tin cups, shouting various commands at the young adults' backs before peeking her head in the door. “Marilla, would you grab the blanket? Our hands are full.” Letting the door slam on her backside before even receiving a response.

“Well, I suppose that is my cue,” Marilla said with an eye roll, standing from the table. From the corner of her eye, she saw Gilbert bend down and snuck a kiss onto the top of Anne’s head before helping her to her feet. Marilla’s heart swelled with joy but she did her best to hide it, crossing her arms and asking seriously, “And I suppose all is finally well with the pair of you? No more skirting around the other?”

The pair smiled as Anne brought her hand up to Gilberts, a familiar chill traveling up his arm and down his spine. “Yes Marilla,” Anne said as she looked up to him lovingly. “All is finally well.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> On a more serious notes, I truly hope everyone is staying safe and healthy during this time. If anyone needs company during this craziness, find me on tumblr or twitter!  
Twitter:iwillflyfree08


	15. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FINALLY IT'S HERE!

** _Epilogue_ **

_ November 21st, 1901 _

_ My dearest, darling Gil (I still love the way that feels to write, I do hope you allow me to continue to do so), _

_ The first true snow has fallen over Avonlea today. The children were incredibly excited that I finished class early so they could run along home and start snowball battles and build tremendous forts. It was quite a sight to behold. I found myself upset that I couldn’t join them, knowing I could easily defeat them with the tactics we would use as children. But alas, my wonderful (and incredibly handsome) Doctor informed me that this winter would be more difficult than most on my lungs. So here I sit, writing a letter from the comfort of my warm office as I listen to their joyous laughter from just beyond these four walls. _

_ A lot has changed in the passing months, even more than I have been including in my last letters. Hopefully I don’t forget anything, but if I do, you’ll just have to come over to Green Gables and scold me for my absentmindedness when you come home in a few weeks. _

_ In your last letter you asked how Diana was faring now that she has settled at home and I am pleased to inform you that she has been doing remarkably well! She has been stopping by the school house twice a week, helping me with the students a few hours a day and teaching them French. Her mother is still trying to convince her that she must find a husband soon but Diana often pretends she cannot hear the nagging. In truth Gil, I don’t think my darling friend longs to marry any time soon, especially not to a man she doesn’t love. Which I am completely fine with, seeing as it means I will get her to myself for just a little while longer. Lately, she has been spending a good amount of time at Green Gables, assisting Jerry with the care of the horses and any chores that were formerly mine. It’s been wonderful having her so close to home, it feels very close to old times. Well, with the exception of two significant members missing. _

_ Moody stopped by a few days ago, bringing along little Sarah with him. Darling, she is a mirror image of her dear mother, from her honey kissed curls and cornflower eyes. Ruby would be so in love with her. It is a shame that Sarah, much like our sweet niece will never know the love of her mother, but the zeal and pure adoration from their fathers certainly does help. He has been dealing with the loss rather well from what I have seen over the last few months but at the slightest mention of our sweet Ruby, this sadness clouds his expression. Although, when I informed him that you would be home for the holidays, I did catch a familiar glimpse of the boy we once knew as he quickly made plans for us to come to dinner (and I do hope you will forgive me for already accepting his invitation). _

_ Wait until you see little Miss Delphine, although I doubt you will be calling her little when you see her in a few weeks (I am convinced she is going to be taller than me by the time she is six!). She asks about you every day when she and Bash come to walk me home, wondering if I have received any more “pitchas” from you (which brings me to ask a favor of you, please try to send a few more of those postcards with the buildings on them. She seems to be gaining a piquing interest in their structure). Bash has also been enjoying your letters, quietly listening to each word as I read them aloud to Dellie. I know he is ready to see you at Christmas, we all are truth be told. _

_ On a more depressing note, I did receive a very strongly worded letter from the Gardner family, who have somehow laid the blame of the broken engagement onto me and have sworn on the Lord’s Holy Name that my work will never see the light of day. Roy told me not to worry when he and Cole visited a few weeks ago and said he would ensure they would never threaten me again. While I’m not entirely sure how he plans on managing that, I feel like it may involve smuggling his siblings off to France with them when they are on holiday next summer. I know you and he had your differences, but Roy seems much happier now that he has moved into Aunt Jo’s mansion with Cole and he’s even begun to lessen his drinking, which is such a relief. I do hope one day the two of you will become good friends or at the very least, don’t go knocking each other off the porch and into my daylilies again. _

_ Oh! Speaking of Cole, did he write to you? He said he was going too but in case he forgot, he has been commissioned by the Queen’s Academy Art Association to paint three new canvas’ for a new exhibit they want to open! He has decided to mix in portraits of former students along with original poems written by Roy and myself. I am incredibly nervous and incredibly honoured that he considered me. I’m enclosing a few that I am thinking about submitting. If you have a spare moment to look over them and help me decide, I would be ever so grateful. The exhibit isn’t until late January, but Cole needs it before the cessation of this year, so I would really value your input on deciding which one. Also, would you like to accompany me to the opening? I know your studies will keep you plenty busy before graduation and preparing for the graduates program later next year but I would very much like to attend with you, seeing as it will be the first time we will be out in a public setting since our courtship started. _

_ Courtship. While the word itself is very romantical, it seems so formal for us doesn’t it? You are still my Gil and I am still your Carrots- which I do hope you know I endure the use of the name only because I love the way it sounds coming from your lips- and not much has changed between us other than our feelings are now known. Perhaps, if we would have been able to share one sweet, tender kiss before you were forcibly taken from me (I still am positively livid that they threatened to pull your scholarship if you didn’t return immediately), this would all seem real and not just a dream. I understand why we couldn’t before, but I find myself being rather selfish when it comes to you, so I do hope you know I intend to spend every waking moment with you the first chance I get. And maybe then, you will have time to convince me that this is indeed, the real world we have always lived in. _

_ I hope your studies are going well. I’m glad to hear that Winnie has officially enrolled at Redmond and will be joining for the winter term. Despite the envy I once felt towards her, I have always considered Winnie to be a kindred spirit and I am so proud of her for wanting to pursue her dreams. Much like I am very proud of you for being accepted into graduate school at the University of Toronto. It will be a fair distance to travel and the years will surely be long as I finish my degree here, but I find myself swelling with so much pride that I can’t even be upset with you. _

_ My love, I must run for now, it is getting rather chilly and if I stay out much longer Marilla will fear I passed out in a ditch on my way home. I will write a longer letter tomorrow, and will continue to write until we are once again reunited. _

_ I love you Gilbert Blythe, today, tomorrow, and until the day I take my last breath (I just realized that was a horrible analogy, I apologize).Be well my dear. _

_ Most lovingly yours, _

_ Carrots _

\-----

_ “Then, being prepared for the journey, they all started for the Emerald City; and the Winkies gave them three cheers and many good wishes to carry with them.” _

Anne gazed about her classroom, each student staring at her wide eyed in awe as she closed the book slowly. “And that is where we must leave our merry gang until after the inception of the new year.” Snapped from the trance they had been sitting in for the last twenty minutes as their teacher had read aloud to them, they let out a series of groans and pleads for more.

“Oh please, Miss Shirley! One more chapter!” Emily cried out the loudest, her hands clasped in front of her. 

“Yes, more please!” Jacob Donnell begged.

“Just a few more pages!” They all cried, in various tones of pleading as Anne stood and crossed in front of her desk. The smallest smile danced on her lips, she understood their feelings all too well. Running away to the land of Oz had been a wonderful journey as she was healing, the magic in it all preventing her from closing the novel until the last of her oil was burning from her lamp beside her. In fact, she loved the story so much that she found herself considering their pleas. But a glance outside put their thoughts to rest as she watched flakes the size of cherry blossom petals swirled about just beyond the thick pane of glass. 

Minnie May, who had been enjoying the novel perhaps more than anyone else, stood and slammed her hands down, causing Anne to jump. “I need to know what happens with the Wicked Witch! Does she get her revenge on the evil Dorothy for stealing her sister's shoes?”

“Minnie May Barry,” Anne said sternly, raising her eyebrows just enough to let her know that she was serious. “Please sit down or I will be forced to ask you to stay late to help me clean this evening.” Anne thought for a moment that the young girl might protest but with a purse of her lips, Minnie May plopped into her chair and crossed her arms. “Good choice.” 

“Now,” Anne said as she turned towards her office, opening the latch and reaching inside for a small basket. Anxiously, the students shifted in their seats as she made her way across the room with a coy smile. “I know that Christmas isn’t for another three days, but I feel that this year that you deserve these a bit early.” 

Even though she had survived her illness, Gilbert had warned her that there may be some last effects for the first year or so. He, of course, had been right. It took two weeks before she found herself able to teach again, a month before she finally convinced Marilla she could walk to work without someone accompanying her. The solo treks were hard at first, she found herself taking short cuts and resting against the occasional willow for a few moments to catch her breath. And oftentimes, she would find herself laying in bed before the sun had even dipped low in the sky. It had been a difficult adjustment but she found ways to pass the time, the most recent involving making each of her beloved students gifts.

Each of the twenty students sitting before her had been some of the most helpful when it came to her healing, all stopping by to provide some sort of help around Green Gables. Some helped in the barn, some split wood or baked dinner with Marilla. And every day of the two weeks she remained off of work, every afternoon as she ate lunch, Minnie May and Emily would come sit at her bedside and take turns reading passages from various books smuggled from Barry's vast library. It brought tears to her eyes to know how much they adored her so she hoped that these small tokens could express just how much she cared for them. 

Anne set the basket down on her desk, earning jaunty giggles as her lips raised. “You all have been so patient and wonderful with me over the last few months. And,” She swallowed down pinpricks, hoping that she wouldn’t cry in front of them. “I am so grateful for each and every one of you. Watching you grow, watching your minds expand and cherish what I teach. It is the greatest gift I could have ever received.” She expected some sort of snicker or snide remark from at least one of her students but everyone stared at her, timid smiles. Anne’s smile grew into a grin, her excitement growing as she began to pull out each of the custom made book marks and set them down in front of her. “Now everyone, there is one for each of you. All with your names on them. Along with one of these…” She placed individually wrapped caramels on top of them, her student’s nearly bouncing out of their seats as she drew out their patience.

“And done,” Anne smirked as she placed the final sweet down. “Now, give me a two step head start before you all get up.” She said with a laugh as she stepped closer to her chalkboard. Some of the boys were already halfway out of their seats, waiting to jump her desk the moment she released them. Anne beamed and clapped her hands together. “Storm the castle!" 

Benches flew back as the students all toppled on top of one another trying to reach the basket first. The whole sight was quite hysterical, everyone fumbling to stand and bickering at one another. Anne should stop them, but she was feeling more tired than she originally had thought. Besides, they were intelligent kids, they would figure this out on their own… right?

Suddenly, a shrill whistle disrupted the commotion, causing all heads, including Anne's, to search for the source. Anne only found herself a little shocked when her eyes found Minnie May standing on top of her bench, fingers falling from her lips. “How about instead bumbling over one another, we actually get our stuff patiently? Miss Shirley worked very hard on these and I think we should appreciate them rather than destroying them!” 

The room sat in a stunned silence. Somehow, class clown, prank player, Minnie May Barry had spoken sense into nineteen other children. Anne crossed her arms, impressed as the young Barry girl jumped down from her desk and gracefully made her way through the pile of students. She shot Anne a wink when she approached the desk, searching the row for her name and then turned to address the students once more. 

“Alright, I don’t know about the rest of you, but I am ready to go home so, everyone line up, find yours, and let’s get out of here!” The class obliged, forming a perfect line and grabbing their presents one at a time, all saying a quiet thank you to their teacher. Minnie May came to stand next to Anne, unwrapping her candy and plucking it into her mouth. 

“I must admit Miss Barry, that was most impressive.” Anne said, crossing her arms across her chest. 

Minnie May shrugged, sucking on her candy. “Eh, figures you would want everyone out of here sooner rather than later.” 

“And why do you suppose that?” Anne said with a smile. 

“Oh, you know,” Minnie smirked as the pair dropped the facade of teacher and student. “Reasons.”

\-----

_ “You might want to wear a hat, snow’s coming down, could get worse.” _ Bash had warned Gilbert. 

_ “Ah, but then I won’t get to give you the feeling of satisfaction of a good ‘I told you so’ when I come back frozen,” _ he responded. He threw open the door and headed out into the snow that was slowly turning from a light flurry into a full fledged storm. Gilbert knew Bash was correct but the young man could hardly contain himself. He had gotten permission from his professors to take his exams early and found himself on the first train he could find back to his home. 

And while his niece jumping into his arms and greeting him with a sweet nose rub was wonderful, in truth, he had come home early because he found himself longing for the warmth he could only seem to find when he was around his love. 

After being rushed away to Redmond, on threat he would lose his scholarship and a rescinding of his letter of recommendation from Doctor Brunhill to U of T, he and Anne hadn’t been able to spend a single moment alone together since they barred their souls to one another. They had conversed more in their daily letters, each one becoming more impassioned for the moment they would get to finally see one another again. But, still, the entire situation felt unreal. After years of staring at her across the school house, of dreaming of her and wondering why her hair always smelled of fresh flowers, she was finally his to hold and love. _ And to kiss. _ He shook the thought away, he was picking her from her place of work. Some propriety would be required.

By the time he reached the fields surrounding Anne’s schoolhouse, Gilbert's heart raced faster, matching the snow. From a distance, he saw the children jump from their seats, storming toward Anne. His legs almost dug into the snow, taking off into a sprint to help her when his eyes connected with the youngest member of the Barry family, a mischievous smirk growing on her lips.

In typical Barry fashion, Minnie May, with her mouse curls tightly wound like a spring, stood and dramatically placed her fingers in between her lips. Gilbert could hear the shrill whistle from where he stood in the field, his eye brows knitting together. The students stopped toppling over the other, staring at their commander as she walked towards the front of the room. 

Gilbert nodded his approval, impressed that Minnie May could command a room just as her father does. He continued to watch as she took a place against the chalkboard, Anne no longer being her teacher flashed one of the smiles that had so often brought him to his knees. He could have stared at her for the rest of the afternoon but his nose was beginning to form a tiny icicle on the tip of it. With a shiver, he took a step closer to the entrance of the school house when realization dawned as he heard the students of the beloved Miss Shirley begin to bid their teacher a happy holiday, filling out the classroom to fetch their coats and hats. 

_ If they see me… _Gilbert’s eyes widened. In truth, surprising Anne had seemed like a wonderful idea when he had been formulating his plan but it was only now that he was beginning to rethink his decision entirely. If her nosy students saw that the two of them were to be alone at the schoolhouse, he was sure that before the next morning's rooster crow everyone in their small town would be whispering about the scandal. Anne would be fired or forced out, leaving her angry and the only person she would have to blame for it would be him. She would end their courtship and take away all the happiness he’d felt since she finally woke up from her fever. 

His heart broke at the thought but he wasn’t entirely to blame for his rash decision. Anne, in all her perfection and wonder, had always caused his thoughts to turn into a muddled mess. _ Sure _ he could have waited an extra day to see her at Christmas Eve dinner, as they originally planned. _ Of course, _he could’ve been a proper suitor and came to call for her at her home and escort her back to the Blythe-Lacroix homestead and cook her dinner. But, much like the morning they first met, he found himself unable to wait any longer than necessary to hear the fire goddess’s voice. Gilbert had hoped that this time he would escape without the slate scar this time, but as her students closed in on the door, he knew that was going to be unlikely if he was caught.

Gilbert watched the door knob turn as panic set in. His time to formulate a plan was over as he looked frantically around until he spotted a wood pile that was just the perfect size for him to hide behind. The door creaked open, followed by festive chuckles and dramatic words. A group of lean boys that reminded Gilbert much of his friends stepped out first as he threw himself behind the stacks of kindling. Luckily, he landed just in time for none of them to see him. Unluckily, his coat had caught onto one of the logs, causing it to teeter for a moment before it collapsed onto his foot.

“_ Ow!” _Gilbert yelped through gritted teeth, hoping no one had heard him.

The snow crunched next to him, his head shooting up to see Minnie May staring at him with a single cocked eyebrow. Two girls stood behind her, their expressions full of surprise. Gilbert bit his lip as a deeper scarlett appeared on his cheeks and neck. 

“Afternoon,” he said slowly, trying to think of a plausible answer as to why he was there. Minnie May’s friends coyly giggled behind her and began to whisper to one another.

Minnie May ignored them as her lips curled into a smile and in unladylike fashion, held out a hand to the downed man. “Looks like you could use some help there, eh Gilbert?” 

Gilbert grabbed her hand and allowed her to pull him up. Normally, he would be utterly embarrassed by receiving help from his life long friends little sister, but his foot was throbbing inside of his shoe and the snow that had seeped into his trousers were making his entire lower body slightly numb. “I was just uh…” His voice trailed, he truly had no valid excuse for why he was there.

“She’s in her office,” Minnie May said plainly as her friend's giggles could no longer be hidden behind mittened fingers.

“Er, uh,” Gilbert stuttered nervously as he brushed snow from his trousers. Minnie May shot a glare to her friends, their laughter silencing immediately. He swallowed as she turned towards him with a smirk. “Thanks,” was all he managed to whisper, too embarrassed to say anything else. Minnie May gave a curt nod but the faintest hint of a smile gave away her true feelings. She turned quickly on her heels, her friends following suit as the three walked down the bend. Gilbert was worried that they would spread word of Miss Shirley’s suitor arriving after they had all gone until he heard their giggles raring as Minnie May began to spout a story about the time her elder sister became intoxicated from ‘cherry cordial’. He made a mental note to himself to bring the young girl an extra apple loaf whenever Hazel baked them next.

Gilbert waited until he saw them enter the woods that led towards the Barry farm before he finally dared to make his way to the door. Gilbert sucked in a deep breath as his hand lingering for a second on the handle. 

_ “Here, let me get this for you, Miss.” _

There was a small tug at the corners of his mouth lifted. How many times had he held the door open for Anne over the years and entered the school house by her side? He recalled almost every time with fondness, each as unique as his Anne, but this entrance was going to be perhaps the most different of them all. For the first time, he wasn't entering the school house as her friend and rival. No, this time he was coming in as her suitor, her love. And he never thought about just how wonderful that would feel.

Crossing the threshold, the schoolhouse looked like an oasis in the drab whites of outside, her custom curtains and painted flower pots still surrounding the room. They were joined with popcorn chains and sprigs of holly and pine. A small tree rested in the corner, ornaments built from branches and yarn resided on it. He smiled brighter, Anne had told him that one day that her coughs were flaring that she had her students each design an ornament to decorate their classroom tree and it had turned out beautifully. She was right of course, it was indeed stunning. 

He stepped farther into the room, thinking of the last time he was here as he brushed his fingers against his old desk. A few short months ago, he had kissed the woman he was intended to in this very spot and it was another reminder of his lack of affection for her. The thought made him shudder. 

Gilbert was torn from his thoughts as Anne’s office door squealed open, her nose deep in what looked to be a child’s journal as she stepped closer to her desk. His breath caught at the sight of her. She was ravishing, even after an entire day of molding young minds. Her hair twisted back into a low bun, baby curls lining her face and nape of her neck. His eyes drifted farther, no longer feeling the slightest bit of guilt as he stared at her petite form. He noticed she was wearing one of his shirts, the sleeves cuffed just below the elbow. It was a little large on her and he was almost certain she wasn’t wearing a corset underneath but he doubted anyone could tell seeing as she had a lilac scarf wrapped around her like a tunic. 

_ "Anne will need something warm for winter and I always thought she would look lovely in this shade of purple. _” Mrs Lynde had told him as she tied off the end of the now seven foot long masterpiece. 

He wasn’t sure at the time how Anne would have been able to wear such a massive frock but he was glad to see she had found a way to improvise it. 

Anne continued reading through her notebooks, crossing over to her desk as she hummed a carol softly. He smirked, quietly digging in his pocket and pulling out a shiny red apple as he walked up to her desk. She didn’t look up at him, instead marking down something in the margin of the paper as she set them down. 

Gilbert reached forward, placing the apple down in front of her, her carol coming to an immediate pause. “Don’t smack me with a slate this time,” he said slyly. Anne slowly looked up, her face filled with disbelief. Her mouth fell to the floor as she took in the site of him. 

“G- Gil?” 

“Long time no see...” Before he could finish, Anne launched herself over the desk, wrapping her arms around his neck and sending them both to the ground. 

Her words flew out like bullets, each sentence coming out more quickly than the rest. “Gil! Oh my gosh, you’re early?! You weren’t due in until tomorrow? Your exams...” she stopped, and pushed away from him. “Gil, what of your exams? Oh God, you didn’t skip them did you! Gilbert Blythe I _ will _smack you with a slate again!”

A hearty chuckle escaped Gilbert’s lips as he stared at the woman laying on top of him and he brushed away her now disheveled hair. “I did not skip my exams, my love.” Anne cocked an eyebrow, her full weight still resting against his chest. “I simply gained permission to take them early. Told them I had important business back home.” His hand drifted down to her cheek, cupping it as crystals formed in her eyes. 

“Oh Gil...” Anne whispered, still in slight shock as she brought her fingers to his soaked curls. Their eyes remained locked, she laying on her elbows on his chest as they took in the sight of one another for the first time in months. His tired eyes held a glimmer in them that she had seen in their few moments together after she awoke from her dream. A glimmer that she knew was reserved only for her. Her gaze traveled to his lips, who were chapped and pink from the cold and she thought quietly to herself how she longed to warm them with her own. He must have been feeling much of the same, as he looped his hand around her neck, begging her closer. 

_ Crack!_

A log from the furnace broke in the fireplace, reminding them both of where they were. Anne shot to her feet, sadly ripping away from his arms and looked around the room anxiously. Gilbert tried to hide his disappointment as he joined her in standing, biting his lip as she continued searching the room to ensure they were alone. “I, uh....” He ruffled his hair, melted snowflakes cooling him as the rest of his body had become unexpectedly warm in the last few seconds. Anne still refused to meet his eyes, her own cheeks matching the crimson on his jacket. This is_ not _ how he wanted their first meeting as a courting couple to go. “Anne, I am really sorry…” he said as he took timid steps away. “I can leave, I just wanted…”

Once again, Anne threw herself forward, nearly sending them both to the ground once more when Gilbert stumbled into a desk and caught the pair of them. Letting out a short laugh, he met Anne’s eyes, who were staring at him as if he were the only other person on earth. Before he could offer her the same look, Anne leaned into him, her lips barely grazing against his. It was hardly anything, few would consider it hardly a kiss at all. But the feeling was there. The one his father had so often described he felt when he was kissing the woman he loved. Only, now that Gilbert had experienced it for himself, he knew it was so much greater than what he had been told.

Anne pulled from him slightly, trying to read his response while trying to process her own emotions. Did she feel it too? The same sunbursts he was feeling in the pit of his stomach? Or was it not what she wanted and disappointed. A million questions swarmed like bees in his mind, her quizzical expression giving nothing away. 

“Anne…” 

Anne closed the distance between their faces, her lips resting on his as she whispered. “We’ve wasted too many years because we have overthought things. Stop thinking Gil.”

“Okay.” Her lips curled against his as he brought a hand to her pinned hair, any space between their bodies now gone. 

The sunbursts returned, growing larger with every passing moment that they remained connected, occasionally spreading their lips to catch small tastes of one another. He was sure her hair was a mess and she was sure that he must be boiling with his wool coat still on his body, but neither pulled away. They both had been waiting too long for this moment and now that it was here, they had no intention of letting it end. 

Only after a few minutes passed did they come up for air, staring breathlessly into eachothers eyes. Anne smiled, letting out an exasperated laugh as Gilbert let his forehead fall to hers. He didn’t speak, instead he took in a deep breathe, allowing lavender to fill his nose. The sun was setting just outside the window, the snow still coming down heavy enough that it would make the walk back to Green Gables a difficult one, but it didn’t matter at that moment.

Almost a year ago, he left for Paris, in a loveless engagement, desperately trying to make himself matter in this world. Little did that Gilbert know, he already did matter. He mattered to his family, the ones that had chosen him. He mattered in the world of medicine, helping others realize that just because something had always been done a certain way didn’t make it the only way. But above all, he mattered to the woman he held in his arms, who planted gentle kisses against his chest as they both caught their breath. 

The day was ending in Avonlea, just as it had done hundreds of times before. But tonight, and every day there after, would be different. Because, as Anne snuggled deeper into his chest, Gilbert Blythe realized that as long as he had her, he was home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My darlings, this story is finally concluded. I have cried, giggled maniacally, and wanted to rip my hair out at some points but I wouldn't trade this journey for anything. I hope you all have enjoyed my first, full length fanfiction and stick around for the sequels (andddd some fun little one shots also set in this universe if i get around to them):) 
> 
> I also want to add in again, a huge thank you to the two women who have stuck with me and listened and read all of my insane ideas. Tessa and Irina, without the two of you, this fic would’ve remained unfinished in my google drive and I wouldn’t have grown as a writer at all. I love you both very very much ❤️
> 
> Much love to you all, I hope you all are staying safe. See you soon ;) xoxo

**Author's Note:**

> As always, big thanks to my babes: Lil_Redhead (royalcordelia) and bruadarxch (rootedbutfl0wing)
> 
> Also find me on tumblr: onedayiwillflyfree


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